Like many Texas Hold 'Em enthusiasts, Rounders is at the top of my list of all-time favorite movies. Like many Rounders enthusiasts my estimation of my game far exceeds its merit. Like many bloggers, the same could be said about my perception of NBA general managers.

But what is an NBA offseason if not a 30-man game of cards? With a chip and a chair every general manager approaches the summer with renewed optimism.

Hands are drawn out, bluffs are made and at every table there is always that one player driving up the costs of hands way past their value. And from time to time there is, of course, the luck of the draw.

Championships, however, have little to do with luck. For sure in the NBA the fortunate drop of a few ping pong balls can change a franchise. But as the Clippers have shown in previous drafts, getting a lucky hand is not as important as the person playing it.

"Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table at the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Vegas?"

Lakers. Spurs. Celtics. Magic. Cavaliers. That these five teams will be the only ones competing for an NBA title this year is hardly an accident. To be fair, at some point each of these teams were dealt the equivalent of a Royal Flush-whether it be through the luck of the draw/draft (Cleveland, Orlando and San Antonio) or gift wrapped via a mechanic's grip (Los Angeles and Boston). But each organization has played their hands well.

In honor of Rounders, the NBA offseason and the summer movie season, here is Rounders recast with NBA general managers (with some liberties taken).

Otis Smith and the Orlando Magic as Mike McDermott: Several years ago the Orlando Magic decided to make a big run after some marginal success as an underdog (the heart and hustle Magic coached by Doc Rivers). Like McDermott, the Magic got a good hand in Tracy McGrady and Grant Hill.

Unfortunately they received a horribly unlucky beat in the form of injuries and decided to cut costs, vowing never to pay the luxury tax again. A few chance incidents later-namely the drafting of Dwight Howard-and the Magic have spurned a former loved one (played by Hedo Turkeyglue) in favor of making another run. Will they win it?

"First prize at the World Series of Poker is a million bucks. Does it have my name on it? I don't know, but I'm gonna find out."

Mitch Cupchak and the Los Angeles Lakers as Johnny Chan: The Golden Boys of the NBA cast as the Golden Boy of Poker. Johnny F-ing Chan. The parallels run so deep that Lakers owner Jerry Buss once promised Chan and NBA championship ring if he could win three titles in a row. And like Chan, the Lakers are a close second in number of world titles held.

Want more? Think of how the Lakers handled Lamar Odom and take a look at the following quote about Chan from the film.

"Johnny Chan. Flops the nut straight and has the discipline to wait him out. He knows Seidel's gonna bluff at it...Look at the control. He knows his man well enough to check it all the way and risk winning nothing with those cards. He owns him. Poor Seidel. Kid doesn't know what hit him."

Los Angeles F-ing Lakers.

RC Buford/Gregg Popovich as Joey Knish: A grinder in every sense of the word. Knish serves as a mentor of sorts to McDermott, earning the respect of poker players in the know for staying within his means while making a successful living. Unfortunately his lack of flash also leaves him open for ridicule by those with skewed intelligence. Like Knish, the Spurs make no apologies for their boring but successful nature.

"It's like any other job. You don't gamble, you grind it out. Your goal is to win one big bet an hour, that's it. Get your money in when you have the best of it, and protect it when you don't. Don't give anything away...A true grinder."

Of course, one of Knish's lines could just as easily describe the lesser half of the rest of the NBA.

"Don't got the stones? You ignorant punk. I play for money. I owe rent. Child supports. I play for money, not the f-ing world series on ESPN."

Ultimately I'd like to think that by the end of the movie, after seeing McDermott's run, Knish gets a bit of inspiration and decides to make a run, albeit a calculated one, of his own. Hence the Richard Jefferson trade for the Spurs.

Danny Ferry and the Cleveland Cavaliers as Petra: The manager of the Chesterfield sits at the table with the big boys and garners their respect as a card shark so it is safe to assume that her skills merit contender status. Still, much like the Cavs' Lebron James highlight reels, Petra serves as little more than talented eye candy in the grander scheme of things.

In preparing for the role, the Cavaliers already have plenty of experience being turned away by the Orlando Magic, our choice for Mike McDermott, who spurned the sexy actresses advances at every corner. Will a new love interest, i.e. Shaq, catapult Petra into a major player?

Kevin Garnett and the Boston Celtics as Grama: A one-time NBA lackey and also ran, the Celtics quickly worked their way up the ranks into a serious position of power. Grama was also once a disrespected lackey. But backed by Teddy KGB, Grama uses the misfortunes of an "an old friend" (Worm) to propel himself up the food chain.

Like Kevin Garnett, Grama saves his biggest displays of power only for the weaker, less respected characters in the film. The casting becomes a little clearer once the choices for Teddy KGB and Worm are revealed.

Kevin McHale as Worm: A number of ill-advised and illegal deals sent Worm to prison. Upon release Worm finds himself in a huge whole and in turn sets upon a number of other ill-advised moves. The NBA has no prison for breaking its rules, but taking away several first round draft picks for an under the table deal with Joe Smith can put an organization in a big hole.

Garnett was once employed by McHale, but the former GM's inability to get out of his own way led to Garnett's trade, prompting the and the Celtic's rise to power. McHale ends this film with whereabouts unknown but little reason to believe that he'll ever change.

"Why do you think your moves are so grand and noble and I'm always the idiot piece of s**t!"

(Editor's note: Isaiah Thomas is naturally the stand-in should McHale abandon his role)

Chris Wallace, Mike Dunleavy and David Kahn as the casino tourists: "Listen, here's thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker."

Chris Wallace might be the worst general manager in NBA history, Mike Dunleavy got a lucky hand but has a dubious history and David Kahn is hardly doing anything to separate himself from McHale. These general managers should never take a call from any halfway competent GM because the only people they can get over on is themselves (see the Clippers-Grizzlies trade).

David Stern as Teddy KGB: Has associated with people with alleged mob ties if you want to stretch the Tim Donaghy scandal a bit. Plus he flat out runs the place. And if the players have any thoughts on a potential lockout all they need to remember is this classic David Stern quote:

"In my club, I will splash the pot whenever the f**k I please."