After my fantasy football team "Cheese Sandwich" lost it's opening game. I realized that someone needs to be blamed.

That person?

Underperforming Quarterback Joey Harrington.

Not only does Joey need to be blamed for my loss. But he needs to be blamed for a great many things. Have you noticed as soon as Joey comes into the equation? Someone suffers?

Examples?

Dear Joey,

Joey, you played your college football at Oregon. Who is the most famous person in Oregon? Great 80's wrestler BILLY JACK HAYNES. When was the last time anyone saw Billy Jack Haynes or his silly hat? Joey, I point my finger at you. Not only that, look what happened to the great Billy Jack Haynes:

"Haynes ended up in a hospital when he was attacked outside a body shop on Southeast Foster Road in Portland. This was due to Haynes' skimming off the top while being a mule in a marijuana smuggling operation some years ago after finding out that he was being underpaid and lied to. Unbeknownst to him, he was transporting cocaine and not marijuana . Haynes himself admitted the motivation behind the attack on his person since the statute of limitations on the laws he broke had run out."

Then Joey went pro and played for Coach Steve Mariucci and the Detroit Lions. Joey were so terrible, that Steve was FIRED! The Mariucci family may starve because of you,Joey.

Also, Detroit Legend Barry Sanders? He suddenly retired, with no reason or explanation. Well Detroit fans. I have solved the mystery for you. Joey, you soon joined the team right after Barry shocked everyone by suddenly retiring. Coincidence? Heck no.

So then Detroit is smart. They get rid of you,Joey.

Then you go to Miami. But then you lose your quarterback job, to who? A quarterback named Daunte Culpepper. Now Daunte got into trouble after having a "naughty party on a boat" (Daunte, you sinner). Now this was before you Joey, but don't try and tell me there's no direct corolation. It's your fault, Joey.

The Boat where Culpepper had his party. I know. Fancy.

So Joey you get sent away from Miami.  You sign with the Atlanta Falcons. Who are you backing up? Michael Vick. Michael Vick is now suspended and is likely going to jail. Joey really made him suffer. Joey, I bet you own a dog costume. And wear it on your off days.

Now it's Timothy M Carr. Who picks Joey for his fantasy football team "CHEESE SANDWICH". Tim loses. And is actually having a pretty bad day. Joey, it is also your fault my lawn mower isn't running properly. Joey, you owe me a new John Deere.

I'm on to you Joey. I'm watching you. Now, so are my readers. Both of them.

Your friend,

TIM