Last Friday afternoon in a Liverpool Crown Court, a jury made up of Liverpudlians, cleared Liverpool FC captain, Steven Gerrard from the charge of affray. This surely was an impressive feat as the incident was captured on CCTV and 'Stevie G' admitted punching Marcus McGee three times whilst feeling a more than merry seven-out-of-ten on the worse for wear scale - call me crazy but if I did that...

I am certainly not insinuating that the jury was blinded by the star power of the England international however it does seem that there is little to no consistency when it comes to punishment and crime regarding professional footballers.

For example everybody's favorite villain, Joey Barton, wasn't as lucky as his fellow Scouser in the affray category. In 2008 he served 77 days of a six-month sentence after a bevy fueled incident in Liverpool City center. Perhaps it one act of violence too much for the jury as Barton has had plenty of previous including stubbing a cigar out onto the eyes of former Manchester City teammate Jamie Tandy - call me crazy but if I did that...

Whether Barton can control the emotions that lead to these sickening outbursts is a matter for people more qualified than myself but it does appear that here is a young man with some serious problems who needs a firm hand.

It is not hard to assume that ex-Leeds United teammates, Lee Bowyer and Jonathon Woodgate were imbibing on that sorry night at the Majestyk club back in year 2000 as their behavior outside the club was not that of a sober couple. Once again the charge of affray was handed down along with the more serious crime of causing grievous bodily harm. After the first trial collapsed, a second trial convicted Woodgate and sentenced to 100 hours of community service while the FA banned him from international selection (it would have been interesting to see what the FA would've have done if Gerrard had been convicted) - Bowyer was cleared! He wasn't so lucky when he slugged Kieron Dyer, his Newcastle teammate in front of 50,000 in 2005. Northumbria Police charged him with a public order offence, fining him 600 pounds - call me crazy but if I did that...

Woodgate has since rehabilitated his image but Bowyer on the other hand still carries the vibe that in one hand he has a stick of dynamite while the other hand messes around with matches - 'handle with care.'

Ben Thatcher wasn't under the influence of alcohol but one assumes he must've been woofing down massive amounts of testosterone when he attempted to separate Portsmouth's, Pedro Mendes' head, from his shoulders. Greater Manchester Police where involved for a short time but later released a statement that read 'in consultation with the injured player, the clubs and the FA, GMP have been informed the player would like to pursue a complaint and have asked for it to be dealt with by the FA, not the police' - call me crazy but if I did that...

Thatcher, like Barton has previous - for the FA to suspend the player for what was basically a criminal act of violence committed on a pitch in front of millions was and is a growing sign that the organization is impotent and that the police don't have the nerve to step onto a turf that is surely theirs.

Ex-Evertonian and Rangers striker, Big Duncan Ferguson wasn't as lucky as Thatcher when it came to on-the-field activities. An off-the-ball assault on John McStay of Raith Rovers led to the Scottish international spending three months in tough Barlinnie prison. For once it seems that the punishment fits the crime however it was just one of four convictions for assault - call me crazy but if I did that...

Ferguson certainly had a reputation has a 'hard-man' and it was well deserved as he was not the kind of player/man that stood for any nonsense on-and-off-the-park. One of the burglars attempting to rob his home in Lancashire found that out as he spent three days in hospital after 'Big Dunc' detained him!

The final incident I want to highlight is perhaps the most famous - Eric Cantona and his 'kung-fu' kick* on Crystal Palace supporter, Mathew Simmons back in 1995. Cantona was sentenced to 120 hours of community service after an appeals court overturned a two-week prison sentence and the FA banned him for nine-months while fining him 10,000 pounds - call me crazy but if I did that...

Even 14 years later the sight of Cantona airborne of the advertising hoarding still shocks but instead of being viewed as a thug, Cantona has taken on a different persona. Now a star of the silver screen, he's seen as a thoughtful, sensitive man and I would have agree having met him once for about 10 seconds and being sucked in by his charisma.

Ultimately though, it seems to me, that regardless of what these men have done on-or-off the pitch, the ability to kick a ball better than your 'average-Joe' trumps everything - and you have to ask yourself whether that is right and the answer is, hell no - will it change, hell no, but it could...

One day perhaps, the courts and Football Association will put fame, celebrity and the ability to entertain aside and treat footballers with the same brush that you and I are painted with - call me crazy but one day it just might happen.

Until then, I'll see you at the far post.

* I asked David Beckham if he was going 'Cantona' last week at the HDC against the LA Riot Squad - he said he wasn't (but he was fined a grand!) however with the abuse still flowing (witness the Galaxy's recent visit to Kansas City), how long before England's finest utters the immortal Cantona words..."when the seagulls follow the trawler, it's because they think sardines will be thrown in the sea. Thank you very much."