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Overwhelming amounts of NBA playoff talk makes me hungry. So it should be understandable that I'm thinking about fast food at this critical first round juncture. The more I think about fast food and NBA teams, the more similarities I uncover.

Take the Chicago Bulls and McDonald's for Example:

The year is 1991; if you don't like the Bulls and you don't like McDonald's your basically dead to the world. Still, 15 years later, the Bulls and McDonald's go together like lamb and tuna fish. Just like McDonald's, the Bulls have their moments. They've got the old favorites- the nuggets, the Big Mac, the Fillet-O-Fish, but once you get deeper on the menu, and or depth chart, things change. Whereas you once thought the Dollar Menu McChicken was a formidable front office move, you also thought the Erik Piatkowski acquisition was something to write home about. Then all of a sudden, three bites into your bargain bin poultry you say, "Hey, I just gnawed into a chicken tendon, this is almost as disgusting as saving a roster spot for an eleven year veteran out of Nebraska." 

            I know what you're thinking. You're thinking Gunnells, you're crazy. Piatkowski owns just about every record involving the three ball and the Los Angeles Clippers. But that my friend is when you get yourself in trouble. That's the time you go back to McDonald's and order the McChicken, only to be foiled once more by a grade-D slab of hen. If I haven't already confused you, I'm going to use the Clippers as a segue to my next comparison

The New York Knicks and Long John Silvers

      I don't make this comparison because Long John Silver's and the New York Knicks are the worse fast food restaurant and basketball team this decade. I make this comparison because a fish stick could manage to build a better organization in New York than Isaiah Thomas.

 The Los Angeles Clippers and Sonic Burger

      Sonic Burger and the Clippers use the term good as loosely as possible. I see these Sonic Burger commercials up here in the original love glove, but never, excluding my trip to St. Louis for the Final Four, have I seen a Sonic Burger. Sonic Burger, which is heralded as not being just good, but being "Sonic Good." Was so mediocre in fact, when I drove by after the Louisville-Illinois blowout, the eatery was closed. Similarly, the Clippers version of good involves getting the sixth best record in the Western Conference. Congratulations Clipps you've reached Detroit Pistons status circa 1998.

The Detroit Pistons and Wendy's

I've always enjoyed a nice, tall, cold, and frosty. On it's own it's good, but by no means an All-Star like a Whopper or a Big Montana. But, when you put the frosty next to a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger, a side salad, and two- five piece chicken assortments, you've got yourselves a starting five about as impressive as the boys in blue.

PG- Chauncey Billups- Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger; the heart of the meal

SG- Rip Hamilton- side salad; the burger's sidekick

SF- Tayshaun Prince- Frosty: tall and reliable

PF/C-Ben/Rasheed Wallace - the nuggets: filling but not overshadowing.

The Denver Nuggets and Taco Bell

If I need to go further than comparing Eduardo Najera's hometown (Chihuahua, Mexico) to the former talking canine Taco Bell spokesman, you are clearly not a member of my target audience. But for sake of proving my point I will take my idea one step further. Is there anything more clutch than the Cheesy Gordita Crunch, or in basketball terms, Carmello Anthony? I think not.

The Cleveland Cavaliers and Burger King

In the land of burger's the Whopper is king. In the land of hardwood and high tops, Lebron James is King. No word yet if you can order King James without lettuce and tomato.

The Los Angeles Lakers (A.K.A. Kobe and the Misfits) and Arby's

      There is nothing good to eat at Arby's besides the roast beef. There is nothing good to watch on the Lakers besides Kobe. Glad we cleared that up.

The Miami Heat and Del Taco

     For those of you unfamiliar with Del Taco, you are truly missing out. This Mexican themed restaurant not only serves breakfast and top notch fish tacos, they also serve fries burgers and shakes, bringing together the best of both fast food worlds. In a similar fashion the Miami Heat brings together the best in both the backcourt and frontcourt world's behind thunder-chunky center Shaquille O'Neal, and young team leader Dwayne Wade.

The Dallas Mavericks and Jack in the Box

      Although I've never seen a Jack in the Box restaurant, or the Dallas Mavericks defense, I am sure they both exist because I googled them earlier.

Jon Gunnells is journalism junior at Michigan State University who is competing in the NGS 2 and finally using a word processor. He can be reached at gunnell2@msu.edu.