Yesterday, the Major League Baseball draft began, and the sports community collectively yawned.  A few of the players drafted may arrive in the Majors soon, but the vast majority of those that reach the big show will take much longer to arrive in a big league ballpark.  Most of the athletes drafted yesterday will never make it to the Majors, toiling away fruitlessly in the Minor Leagues, holding onto their last shred of their boyhood dreams.

It is because of the poor opportunities for immediate success that the Major League Baseball draft is a non-event.  Why should baseball fans get excited about a seventh-round pick that will never make the Big Leagues?  Sure some seventh-rounders like Tim Norton, (a high school classmate of mine in Rhode Island picked by the Yankees yesterday after a great college career at UConn, I just had to give him a shout-out) will be great major leaguers, but far more of these players will never be heard from again.

Thinking about how little sports fans care about the baseball draft made me wonder what other sporting events rank as the top non-events in sports.  I have compiled a list of non-events, which is stated below.  The main criteria for a sporting event being a non-event is that it must be of minimal long-term interest to fans of the sport.  Baseball fans don't get all jazzed up about the draft months before it happens, and many can't remember who their team picked two weeks after the draft.  The other events I have listed have the same qualities.

PGA Tour Qualifying School- There may be hardcore golf fans that spend all year looking forward to following the trials and tribulations of the men on the cusp of making the PGA Tour, but I doubt it.  Without using google, can anybody name one of the top-ten finishers from this event last year?  Golf fans follow Q-School while it's in progress, but many of the names and storys are forgotten very soon thereafter.

WWE Pay-Per-View Press Conferences- Okay, okay, pro wrestling isn't a sport in many people's minds, but athleticism is involved in WWE matches, so it has a place in this list.  Before every Pay-Per-View, the WWE hosts a press conference in the city hosting the wrestling event.  Even wrestling fans don't give a crap about these press conferences.  Come on, wrestling fans.  Try to picture yourself saying "I can't believe Triple H put down Cena at that press conference!"  You'd never say that.  Press conferences are meaningless.

NFL Trade Deadline- In recent years, the NFL trade deadline has yielded exactly ZERO blockbuster deals.  Perhaps this is due to the early date of the deadline, but that does not change the trade deadline's non-event status.  I care much much more about the trade deadline in the Madden video games, where blockbuster deadline deals actually are a real possibility (much more real than completing a screen pass), but in real life, I think I'd rather watch paint dry than analysis of the trade deadline.

WNBA Preseason Games- Quick, name one memorable performance in a WNBA preseason game?  Can't do it?  Didn't think so.

Beer Pong- It can also be argued that drinking games are not sports, but anybody that has ever participated in a 15-cup, 8 beer game of beer pong will beg to differ.  The only people that care about the results of a beer pong tournament are the tournament winners themselves.  A few buddies of mine tried to start a beer pong league a few years ago.  All efforts to organize a bunch of drunks into teams over the course of a full season proved to be futile at best.  Perhaps it's the affects of the alcohol, but very few people remember beer pong games the next day.

That's my list of sporting non-events for now.  I may make this a running feature of this blog, adding items as they come to mind.  If anybody has any ideas for non-events, please feel free to let me know.

Again, congrats to Tim Norton on being drafted by the New York Yankees.  This may be the only time in history that I've been excited to see the Evil Empire acquire a player.  I guess it took the drafting of a small-town player, a player from my own small town and my own high school graduating class, to accomplish this feat.   Good luck Tim.

With reports circulating today that Roger Clemens is about to sign a one-year contract to pitch for the Houston Astros, many high-revenue teams will be scrambling to figure out a Plan B for solving their starting pitching woes.  Teams such as the Yankees, Red Sox and Mets, among other big-money contenders, may soon turn their attention to Dontrelle Willis, the young lefthander of the Florida Marlins.  Although the Marlins have stated in the past that Willis is not presently on the market, these are the Florida Marlins we're talking about, and anybody is availible at any time.

When teams, fans, and talking heads look at Willis, they see a star in the making.  With electrifying pitches and his unusual delivery, Dontrelle Willis has the skills needed to fulfill his full potential.  His regular-season career ERA of 3.27 entering the 2006 season is stellar for a third-year pitcher.  Where Willis may be lacking, however, is his psyche.  Dontrelle Willis, throughout his career, has not been a good big-game pitcher.  When the world is watching in a high-pressure situation, Willis melts like Velvetta in a microwave.  If his stuff is sufficient and his delivery is deceptive, there is only one possible reason why Willis hasn't performed as well in big spots.  Simply put, Dontrelle Willis can't handle the pressure of big games.

The statistics bear out my claim of Willis's lack of big-game heroics.  In the 2003 postseason, Willis was 0-1 with an ugly ERA of 8.53 in 12.1 innings pitched.  While some may view this performance as an excusable abberation by a young pitcher, Dontrelle's subsequent performances in big games are even more alarming.  In his next chance on the national stage, the 2005 All-Star Game, Willis allowed two earned runs in his lone inning of work.  Perhaps the worst performance of all Dontrelle's big-game appearances occurred in the 2006 World Baseball Classic.  Willis was charged with the loss in both starts he made for Team USA, managing only 5.2 innings of work and putting up a ghastly 12.71 ERA. 

The numbers add up.  Dontrelle Willis is a lousy big-game pitcher.  If you need an arm to get you to the postseason, there are few better than Dontrelle Willis.  But if you're counting on him to win a crucial game 7 in Yankee Stadium, then you can go ahead and book that Caribbean cruise the next day, for Dontrelle Willis will not get the job done. 

From time to time, I like to write musings and observations about all sorts of things, primarily sports.  Today, while I risk getting fired for inappropriate use of a corporate computer, I'll do that.

- Ever wonder whatever happened to NFL third-string quarterbacks that get bounced from the league?  I'm not talking about players of the Jason Garrett or Erik Kramer caliber, rather no-names like Jay Barker, Joe Germaine, and Scott Secules.  What becomes of them after the NFL?  Investment bankers?  Sanitation engineers?  Faceless bloggers?  Are you blogging on this site, Tommy Hodson?  Fess up, man, we know you are...

- If I open up a cheese shop and call it Cheesus Christ, do I go straight to hell without even passing through purgatory?  Seems like a good way to save some time by skipping the judgment step. 

- Wait a minute, never mind, already been through hell.  It's called rooting for University of Rhode Island men's basketball.  Such poor coaching, so little talent, so little hope.  Hell, I saw them lose to an NAIA team a couple years back AT HOME!  Why do I torture myself?

- The Indianapolis 500 is this Sunday.  Remember when people cared about this race, when it was the greatest spectacle in racing?  Not anymore.  NASCAR and the Daytona 500 have stolen all the thunder from Indy.  I'm a racing fan, so I'll be watching Sunday.  I just can't say the same for everybody else.

- Speaking of Indy, go Helio!  With his charisma and enthusiasm, Helio Castroneves is the best thing IndyCar has going for them.  His third Indianapolis 500 win would give next year's race a shot in the arm, as he would then be attempting to tie the victories record and claim his place in history.

- Ted Ferguson, I'm staying at work 2 whole HOURS past 5:00 on a Friday.  Top that, bitch.

- The Red Sox have played the Yankees too many times this month.  I didn't even care about Wednesday's game one bit.  Now I know how a Devil Rays fan feels...except for the hopeless losing part.

- Where have all the bloggers gone?  I didn't make the finals of NGS, but I'm not giving up on my blog.  It seems like a lot of this site's users have done just that, given up on writing their blogs because they didn't succeed.  Not me.  I'm going to take advantage of this time to hone my skills so I can make the top sixteen when NGS3 comes around.  I'll be way ahead of the game by then. 

That's all I have for today.  Enjoy the holiday weekend.

My trip to Philly has come and gone.  Wow, what a blast those last two days were!  On the way to Philadelphia, we didn't hit any traffic at all, and made it there in under four hours, near record time for a minivan traveling from Rhode Island to Pennsylvania.  My friends and I spent Saturday afternoon exploring the city and eating cheesesteaks from Geno's, which may be the single greatest sandwich place in the history of time.  The highlights of the trip, however, were definitely the baseball games on Saturday night and Sunday morning.  Even though the Red Sox only took the Saturday affair, both games were extremely exciting and enjoyable.  Even Lenny DiNardo couldn't spoil the fun on my trip.

In my last post, I mentioned that Wally the Green Monster may have a leg up on the Philly Phanatic in the race for best green mascot.  As you may recall, I based that claim on the Wally dolls with Jerry Remy's autograph planted firmly on the gluteus.  After seeing the Phanatic in person, I have to eat some crow and admit that I jumped to conclusions a bit prematurely.  The Philly Phanatic isn't just the greatest green mascot of all time, he is the greatest overall mascot of all time, period.  From Riverdance with fake umpires to John Deere tractors equipped with hot dog cannons, the Phanatic's actions were the funniest events I have ever witnessed at a baseball game, even funnier than Izzy Alcantara's infamous catcher-kicking incident with the Pawtucket Red Sox.  Seriously, my friends were more upset about missing the hot dog cannon while standing in the beer line than missing Josh Beckett's home run.

Citizen's Bank Park is a nice facility, but I've been to better ballparks.  The stadium was very clean and comfortable, and there wasn't a bad seat in the house.  The environment, however, seemed sterile to me.  Camden Yards and Fenway Park both have much more character than Citizen's Bank Park.  The new stadium has to be an upgrade from Veteran's Stadium, but more could have been done to give it some character.

The worst moment of my mini-vacation had nothing to do with the trip at all.  I had been looking forward to seeing highlights of the Preakness, for after Barbaro's dominating win in the Kentucky Derby it seemed he had a legitimate shot at the Triple Crown.  My heart sank when I saw him pull up lame just a few yards into the race.  I couldn't hear the sports anchor discussing the highlights (I was watching the TV in a bar in the stadium, McFadden's, which is one of the nicer touches of Citizen's Bank Park.)  I was actually happy to learn Sunday morning that Barbaro had not been euthanized yet, and that an attempt would be made to save his life.  As of this writing (Monday afternoon), his chances of survival are 50/50.  Certainly Barbaro isn't out of the woods yet, but he's fought hard to make it this far, and I know he won't stop fighting.  Best wishes to Barbaro.  Nobody wanted to see your career end the way it did, and I certainly hope this isn't the end of a young horse's life.

All in all, my trip to Philadelphia is an experience that I will likely never forget.  Any time spent with friends is time to cherish forever, and this past Satuday and Sunday were filled with great memories for me to look back on years from now.

The Boston Red Sox are not the only group heading to Philadelphia this weekend for the renewal of the "natural" rivalry series with the Phillies.  Saturday morning, I am leaving with a group of five friends to watch the Red Sox and Phillies do battle on Saturday night and Sunday morning.  I am looking forward to seeing the epic battle that will answer many burning questions.  How will the Red Sox fare with either Kevin Youkilis or Mike "Doubles" Lowell riding the bench for the purpose of keeping Big Papi in the lineup? (Hopefully well.)  Can the Phillies mount a charge and overtake the Mets in the NL East?  (Possibly, but I'll be happier if they don't start charging until Monday.)  Who is the coolest fuzzy green mascot of them all, Wally the Green Monster or the Philly Phanatic?  (They sell Wallys with Jerry Remy's autograph on the ass, case closed.)  Over the next few days, these questions, and more, will be on full display in Citizens Bank Park (unofficial slogan: Not your typical hitter's paradise). 

The one Red Sox player that I am looking forward to seeing above all others, believe it or not, is Wily Mo Pena.  When the Bronson Arroyo trade first occured, I was unsure of what we were getting in terms of talent from Wily Mo.  Certainly the first week or two of the season did nothing but heighten my uncertainties, as Pena looked as good on the field as Rosie O'Donnell does in a bikini.  (I know, that's a cheap shot.  Sorry for digging that low, Wily Mo.)  Over the past month, having a chance to see Wily Mo Pena every day leaves me with no question as to why the Red Sox gave up a proven starting pitcher to obtain his services.  Pena has the most natural baseball ability I have seen from a young Red Sox player since Nomar Garciaparra.  With more playing time, Pena should become more patient at the plate, and won't chase as many bad pitches.  When that time comes, he will be one hell of a difficult out.

Some may claim that I have a Man Crush on Wily Mo Pena.  For those that believe that, I have one thing to say: You are right.  I undoubtably have a Hetero Man Crush on Wily Mo Pena.  Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I can't wait for 6:00 AM on Saturday.  The ride from Rhode Island to Philadelphia is not a short one, but hopefully the anticipation of game time will make it fly by.  Monday I will write a post about my impressions of Citizens Bank Park, and the atmosphere surrounding a Phillies game as a whole.  Enjoy the weekend, everybody.

  Side note: can anybody tell me WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THIS SMILEY???  IT FREAKS ME OUT!!!