American scientist Dr. Emmit Brown appeared in court today to file harrasment charges against two NBA owners,  and others including at least one NBA all-star.  Among those mentioned in the charges are Blazers owner Paul Allen, Mavericks owner Mark Cuban, and Laker all-star Kobe Bryant.  The charges state that these individuals along with others, have ignored all Brown's request to 'leave him alone' and will not stop flooding his e-mail, voice mail, answering machine and mail box with requests for a 'time machine.' 

Left: Dr. Emmit Brown at work in his lab.  Right: A picture of time machine prototype.

 Brown admits that he had at one time had an idea for a time machine, but there had been several incidents involving the prototype and he had decided that it was best to "let the past be the past."

"While I must admit that the challenge of building a time machine interests me, I think that it's better that I don't.  An individual may think that changing one small thing in the past might be harmless, it can prove to be disasterous to the future, or present, as it were."

When called for comment Portland Trailblazer's owner spoke highly of Brown and his work, and expressed regret over Brown's decision to file charges against him.  "I have a lot of respect for Dr. Brown, but the charges against me are completely unfounded.   I never asked him to build a time machine for me.  I actually wanted to hire Dr. Brown as an assistant GM for our organization.  Then I wanted him to go back in time to represent us at the 1984 draft, and to choose Michael Jordan, instead of Sam Bowie."  

In the 1984 draft the Portland  drafted Sam "Who" Bowie (left) instead of Micheal "double threepeat" Jordan (right).

 Mavericks owner Mark Cuban was unavailible for comment, but there is some speculation that he might use a time machine to travel back to 2004 and resign Steve Nash.  Other notable mistakes Cuban might want to correct are his team's chokes in both the 2005-2006 and 2006-2007 playoffs and of course his reality tv show 'The Benefactor.' 

Did Mark Cuban bet on the wrong white guy?  Could Kobe have saved himself some drama by just killing this woman?

  Kobe Bryant was likewise unavailable for comment.  A source close to Bryant notes several passing comments he's made in the past that may shed some light on his motives.   "He's always saying stuff like; 'I knew I should have killed that bitch,' 'How bad could the Hornets really have been?' and 'Clippers, Clippers, Clippers, damn!'"

  Other notable people mentioned in Brown's filing are Nick Nolte,  Tom Selleck, Meg Ryan, and Cyndi Lauper.