Vine ripened, sliced, diced, tossed on a burger - sounds damn good for a warm summer day.

Just not today.

I'll take my burger medium, with cheese, and lycopene-free, because these tomatoes are being saved for the sports world, my friends...

Throwing Tomatoes: June 24, 2009


Spain Soccer

Can I get a little "U-S-A! U-S-A-!"? The United States pulls off the shocker, knocking off Spain 2-0 in the semis of the Confed Cup. Yes, the same Spain that had won 35 straight and was the #1 ranked team in the world.

Funny, I always thought France was the country that surrendered that easily.

Speaking of surrendering...

Maria Sharapova

Sharapova surrendered early at Wimbledon (the second round), at the hands of Gisela Dulko (6-2, 3-6, 6-4). Not much more to be said, but it does present a nice opportunity to present a visual to you (pictured).

Speaking of visuals...

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim

The Angels recently posted a list of blunders as long as the team's name - in the form of six wild pitches in one game, tying a club record.

And only one visual comes to mind for me... yep, Ricky Vaughn - "juuuuuust a bit outside". "Wild Thing, you make my heart sing, you walk everything..."

Speaking of outside...

Terrell Owens

Owens got lit up by supermodel Joanna Krupa after getting stuck outside on an obstacle course, eventually losing on The Superstars to David Charvet (Baywatch) and Jennifer Capriati (Tennis).

In a related story, Tony Romo called Krupa and asked, "What's your secret?"

Speaking of superstars...

Big 12 vs. SEC

Congratulations to the LSU Tigers, your College World Series superstars of 2009.

Once again, somehow the Big 12 STILL can't get the job done against the SEC in a championship game. The SEC fans would likely banter and joke that they can't handle the pressure. Just as long as they don't wear those LSU yellow jerseys, I'm OK with it.

Speaking of pressure...

Legends: Their Kids Quitting Sports

Another shocking story about a young man backing out of sports, as Jeff Jordan (MJ's son) has decided to leave Illinois b'ball after just two seasons.

If you'll recall, John Elway's son left Arizona State football fairly recently.

FYI to Nick Montana: You can't escape the spotlight in Washington. You're still within reach, we aren't talking anywhere near Russia here, just ask Sarah Palin.

Speaking of backing out...

Jarrett Stoll

As reported by FOXSports.com, the L.A. Kings hockey player has canceled his wedding plans - 1) to a supermodel in Rachel Hunter and 2) over email.

Email? Yikes, that's a five-minute major and a 500kb spam message to boot.

Seriously, this brings new meaning to a hockey player getting cold feet. OK, can't end on a joke that bad...

Speaking of plans...

Chris Johnson

Finally, Titans RB has been inquiring via Twitter about TD celebrations. The young gun wants to top some of the best celebrations, say from Ocho Cinco, among others.

Hey, here's a crazy idea... wait for it... how about handing the ball to the ref, heading over to the sideline, and focusing on winning the game... and a Super Bowl.

What a concept.


This has been "Throwing Tomatoes"... where we suggest to avoid Angels pitching for the assist., that is, if you want to hit your target.

If you're a golf nut like me, you feast off of the game's majors, watching shots, seeking drama unfolding, searching for a story to emerge.

At the 2009 U.S. Open, the doorway was open for a number of big time stories to walk right through - from Tiger Woods, the favorite, to creep one closer to Jack's record, to Phil Mickelson buckling down and winning one for his wife and family, who have fallen on tough times.

What did we get? Mother Nature, rearing her ugly head and laughing hard as the sky cried on every golf fanatic's fun.

Yes, the 2009 U.S. Open spent the majority of its weekend underwater. But while the sun failed to shine, the dampening monotony of this weekend would not take away our spirit as fans.

The gallery tossed out visual proof of this spirit, begging for golf balls, showering the audio skies with "you da man's" and "get in the hole" one-liners, as absurd as they have become - they still showed that every fan would not let Mother Nature win.

That is, until the Bethpage alarm sounded, spearing a painful echo to each golfer's brain, like that of a daily alarm clock.

Play was suspended. Until Monday - when most of us, including yours truly, are stuck at a desk job - toiling with Lumberg-like folk as opposed to watching a potential historic finish to one of golf's biggest dances.

Quick, lick the bottom of the fridge - get a sickness... or don't be that drastic, just do your best impression of the fake hacking and dreary voice that tells your boss that a sick day is on the horizon.

Why? Ask Shooter McGavin - because "This is golf people!"

Because Monday morning, the Bethpage Black bonanza resumes - and it's just gettin' good.

Only seven players remain in red figures, and one shouldn't be swayed by Lucas Glover and Ricky Barnes sitting on top of the leaderboard, five shots ahead of the rest of the group. Each of the two, while talented, have never been on a stage like this, and the pressure is likely to mount with each shot. There was living proof of that as the final round began, as Barnes' tee shot on two was not his norm, but more something out of the Charles Barkley book of golf.

Phil Mickelson (-2, five back) was solid on his first two holes, presenting himself with two great birdie chances, both of which he missed. Still, there was a look of determination in Lefty's eye, and one could sense that he won't go quietly in the night.

Heck, even David Duval is back for a little fun, sitting at -2, tied with three others, including Mickelson. Duval can come into this dance with less pressure than in the past, when the media was desperate to place him in golf's center ring with Tiger.

Then there's Woods himself, lurking at even par, after staying out in the darkness and draining a birdie on the 7th. Woods, having a few un-Tiger-like-breaks in the early going, has momentum leading into the a.m., plus five additional holes inked on his card over the leaders.

And look at it how you want, but on the final day of a major, it's often the fact that a player has escaped unscathed, while the leaders come back to the pack. It would come as no surprise to see Woods or Mickelson (or both of them) to post a -4 or -5 number, leaving Barnes (who has a shot in the deep stuff waiting for him in the morning) and Glover to scramble to survive the lengthy Long Island course.

Aside of the dewy rain and moldy-damp scents of the State Park's Black course, this tournament certainly has the smell of another one of those trademark major championship endings - only on a Monday... a work day.

Damn, I think I'm coming down with something.

Usually the tomato throwing is a piece of cake.

While playoff games have reached a boiling point with both the NHL and NBA reaching finales, the rest of sports has been tepid at best.

Even with the drama down, there are plenty of situations up and available for discussion over the last week. Take the following lycopene-enriched examples...


Throwing Tomatoes: June 5, 2009


NBA Finals Not Final Yet

Keep Your Brooms in the Closet - Let's not all jump the sweep bandwagon just yet. The Magic got a ton of open looks in Game 1, missing most of them.

Orlando Magic - Rashard Lewis admitted they "stunk it up", and if Orlando can improve on the glass, along with getting hotter from the field, they could get right back into the series.

LeBron James - Yes, all the talk is still surrounding King James and how he bailed on the end of the Eastern Conference Finals. But the side story...

Recently, it was reported that James had a growth removed from his mouth. Fortunately, it was benign. I think it's safe to say that whatever it was, he didn't get it while swallowing his pride.


Twitter & Tony

If you haven't heard, Tony LaRussa sued Twitter due to a case where someone created an account and impersonated the Cardinals coach, saying inappropriate things about his past and "causing emotional distress". Hours ago, Twitter and LaRussa have come to a settlement.

The biggest tomato obviously goes to the idiot who had no life and felt the need to impersonate someone else in a negative way. Meanwhile...

Twitter was having trouble issuing a statement on the matter, because they're only allowed 140 characters or less to send a message.


Big Papi's Big Slump

Boston is still reeling as David Ortiz continues to struggle. It's tough when a legend begins what appears to be a decline, especially one this rapid. And the latest...

I heard Ortiz is going to be getting an eye test. The good news, apparently he got a recommendation from one of the umps. Fine, it's true, that last part Is fabricated.


Four Scores, Maybe Seven Years Ago?

Also mentioned via a Yahoo Sports blog a few days ago, if you haven't heard, the Notre Dame Stadium scoreboard is up for sale. One can buy it here... get it while it's hot!

Either way, it could be a bargain. After all, the scoreboard has been barely used in recent years. Dang, it's like shootin' fish in a barrel - just couldn't resist.


That's all for now, friends. Enjoy the NBA Finals, the Stanley Cup Finals, etc. As always, audience tomato participation is encouraged.

Recently, yours truly dabbled in the art of playoff beard growth.

Call it in the honor of sports, from the NHL, where players make it a point to get as scraggly as a wildebeest, to the NBA players that do it - though besides the occasional Pau Gasol, the pro ballers would likely choose the way of a "tat growing" contest instead.

Or maybe it was in the honor of baseball, but only for the franchises that allow such a thing, such as the Red Sox, featuring guys like Kevin Youkilis, who could likely hide a few small woodland animals in his face.

Call it pure laziness, where a day that a misplaced shaver turns into a day where a found shaver with no charge in it, to a landscape of stubble that really wasn't stubble at all but more of a mixture of sandpaper and skin.

And poof! A contest is born... but what type of playoff beard could be grown? Here's to hoping I can make the men of sports proud with these hair-filled concoctions...



The Griffin Bird Beard

Give it some time and maybe a bushy circular mass could be formed, say resembling Peter Griffin's character on Family Guy, specifically in the episode where he eventually had an endangered bird make a nest in his beard. As a result, he couldn't harm the bird, and couldn't eat either.

Yeah, sounds tasty.

The Speedy-Sein Beard

Hey, if you want to resemble a true gritty sports player, one must grow with authority, say like Jerry Seinfeld on his show, during the episode with the Wolf-mocking scene at the end. This was also the muffin tops show, where Jerry would get a five o'clock shadow quicker than one could say "quarter past my skin". In the end, he began shaving for a woman, because she loved everything hairless.

Dang, that would help the cause.



The Una-Phoenix Beard

Then there's the beard type that comes across as not the least bit well groomed. Take Joaquin Phoenix's latest look, where he made an appearance on David Letterman's show and Dave tossed a "Unabomber" zing in his direction. This beard needs grooming, and it's one that Alex Ovechkin would be jealous of.

Messy and wayward, but quite effective.

Polling the Community

As a fan of sports, and someone who has witnessed the art of the playoff beard, I want to poll the community - have any of you grown a playoff beard or done anything crazy or insane to support your team? If so, what? I want to hear about it!

There are a lot of teams out there that have promoted such things - in fact, the Washington Capitals had a playoff beard growing contest during the most recent NHL Playoffs.

In the End: The McBeard

In the end, in regards to my beard, days went by and it was more a "Josh-McDaniels-like" face that resulted... more of a McBeard if you will... the hair was there, but it was more of a baby's bottom than anything else.

Heck, who am I kidding? McDaniels could probably take me.

Maybe I should contact the Olympics committee, maybe we're onto something here.

Then again, maybe not.

Shaver, you win. This thing itches like hell anyway.

The "College Football Queen" herself, Lisa Horne, contributing writer at Fox Sports, has decided to team up with yours truly in a little series we like to call "You're Right, I'm Wrong".

For the old school bloggers in the Fox Sports community, you will recall "He Said, She Said", a little series with a similar flavor that teamed up Reverend Rhythm and Bluegrass Lady.

As Lisa mentions over on her blog, Straight Talk from the Left Coast, we hope to debate a new topic every week, and suggestions are encouraged - especially if it's regarding a topic I know very well.

This week's topic: September's college football grudge match between USC and Ohio State. Lisa will be drawing a line in the sand and taking USC - and to quote Gomer Pyle, "Surrrrrprise, surrrrrprise!" That leaves me, and you guessed it, I'm going with the "Fightin' Sweater Vests", the Ohio State Buckeyes, and here's a few reasons why Columbus will be rockin' after the smoke clears...

The Lucky Horseshoe

Let's start with the obvious, shall we? Home field advantage... and let's face it, it's a nightmare for opponents to play at the 'Shoe. Just ask anyone that's had to go in there and deal with the noise. In fact, Vince Young once referred to Ohio Stadium as "the loudest place I've ever played".

If the Trojans are going to have trouble traveling to a place like Corvallis, sporting its capacity crowd of just over 45,000, try dealing with Ohio State's humble abode, chock full of electricity, an "unwelcome mat" and a crowd of 100,000 plus.

On top of all that, as Lisa mentions on her post, the Buckeyes are 46-1 at home against non-conference teams, with the only loss being against Texas in '05 (a close 25-22 game). What Lisa fails to mention is that this is the same Texas team that eventually won the National Title (eventually defeating... yep, you guessed it ...USC). And oh yeah, the Bucks beat Texas on the road the following season.

The Big Ten Entrenched

Jim Tressel and the Buckeyes play a style like most of the Big Ten, focusing on the trenches, preaching solid defense, and controlling field position via a solid special teams group. And while the Buckeyes return only 12 starters, this team does bring back some big weapons on special teams, as well as its entire defensive line.

Included on this defensive line are four returning starters, two seniors and two juniors, all who have the experience that will help try and wreak havoc on Aaron Corp, the talented but inexperienced USC QB that has been tabbed as Mark Sanchez's successor.

Last year's OSU D was consistent, ranking 18th in rush defense and 25th in pass defense. This d-line can plug up the running game, forcing Corp to try and beat them through the air, while dealing with the crowd noise.

Having "Pryor" Experience

Terrelle Pryor may only be a sophomore entering this season, but he will be the QB with experience in this game, and while Pryor made his share of freshman mistakes, he most certainly will be a better player in '09. The former top rated recruit has a ton of talent, both throwing and running, and Pryor's mobility is what is going to be key here, because with Ohio State's question marks in the running game, having Pryor as a dual threat should at least help in keeping USC's defense honest.

With a number of its offensive weapons departing, including WR Brian Robiskie, WR Brian Hartline, and RB Chris "Beanie" Wells, Pryor is not only going to need to put this offense on his back, but a number of other talented players are going to need to step it up.

"Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better..."

Recent football chatter has been how when a handful of Trojans depart for the NFL, it never matters because Pete Carroll and his staff just restock and reload. USC stockpiles talent, yes, but critics need to take a step back and look at the big picture. USC is not alone in this department. In fact, the Buckeyes (under Tressel) have recruited exceptionally well. In fact, according to the 2009 class rankings on Scout.com, the Buckeyes are the #1 class, with USC landing in the #9 slot. Sure, the Trojans managed ten players from the Top 100 and four five-star recruits, but the Buckeyes were not far off, landing seven Top 100 players and three five-star recruits. On top of that, the Buckeyes also rated ahead of the Trojans in 2008.

So while both teams are in need of some retooling, Ohio State is reeling in as much talent as USC, and while recruiting is an inexact science, both teams will likely feature emerging young stars in 2009 and going forward. Just don't be so fast to say that USC is the only team restocking with ease.

"Coach Klein" That Playbook

We all know how Coach Tressel likes to try and control a game, but with USC, the Buckeyes really need to open up the playbook more - say in "Coach-Klein-like" fashion, as in the coach from The Waterboy, who loved to call some borderline absurd trick plays. But the fictional Klein gets pushed as a reference because he was far from vanilla.

Vanilla won't fly with the Trojans, as USC just has too much talent, coupled with Carroll's experience. So instead, catch USC a little off guard, maybe with a fake punt, a fake field goal, or a few trick plays that help open up Pryor for a big play or two.

It can work against USC - just look at Penn State in last season's Rose Bowl. Fine, the Trojans put a hurting on Penn State in the first half, but the Nittany Lions did move the ball and score on a USC defense that was significantly more lethal than its 2009 unit, which still lacks experience (the Trojans lost eight defensive starters).

With Penn State, it was the "Spread HD" offense, and Tressel needs to pull a few tricks from that sweater vest sleeve, or this game could possibly get out of hand.

In Conclusion

The game is three months away, yes... but with names like Ohio State and USC, the hype should begin now. I'm not here this soon to toss out plays and techniques, but I'm here to tell you a few basic reasons why the Buckeyes could leave that September night with a tally in the win column. The homefield advantage, the talented QB with a year under his belt, the defensive line experience, the special teams weapons, maybe a few trick plays, and the Buckeyes could be driving USC "nuts" - and setting the stage for another off-the-wall college football season.

"You're Right, I'm Wrong" - Lisa Horne Takes USC