3 Minnesota teams in action this Sunday, so let's get to it (probably more if you count hockey, but really, is anybody ready for hockey in September? Of course not)

CHICAGO WHITE SOX @ MINNESOTA TWINS, Friday 7:10, Saturday 11:10am!!!!!(that's not a typo), Sunday 1:05pm. (FSN and channel 29)
Final regular season weekend for your hometown 9, when we'll find out if they'll be hosting Oakland or more likely, traveling to the Bronx early next week. Twins and Tiggers are all square, but the Stripes have the tie-breaker, so the Twinks basically need to sweep this weekend in order to win the division. And even that may not be enough as Detwah has taken 13 of 14 from Kansas City so far this year. Minnesota's record against baseball's worst team? Just 10-6. Look no further than that stat as a reason they probably won't win the division.

However, my roommate Kris made a great point last night on why that might not be a bad thing: everybody's scared of the big, bad Yankees, and rightfully so. They are clearly the best team in baseball and clearly the best bet to win the World Series. However, if the Twins win the division and defeat Oakland, they'd likely play the Yankees in a 7 game series. But if the lose the division, they'd play the Yankees in a best-of-5. I figure the road through to the World Series goes through the Bronx Bombers, so as Kris would, I'd rather play them in a 5 game series instead of 7, with Santana throwing twice, including the opener. Once we find out who the Twins are playing, we'll break it all down for you as always, but for now, don't be heartbroken if the Twins don't win the pennant this weekend.

Remember this: 3 of the last 4 World Series champs (Boston, Florida and Anaheim) were all wildcards- and all of them had to go through the Yanks.

#6 Michigan Wolverines (4-0) at Minnesota Gophers (2-2), Saturday, 7:00pm (ESPN)
Big 10 football Saturday night under the lights- er dome. That outdoor stadium can't get here fast enough. Then again neither can a defense, a new coach, and a new athletic director. The GOphs have played Michigan tough the last few years, but it's hard to see this one being anything but a Maize and Blue parade of touchdowns. In those past couple of years, the Gophs had a great rushing offense and a decent defense. This year, the ground game as been better, but certainly not great, and the defense has been worse than usual, which is saying something for a Glen Mason team.

Making the uphill battle even steeper is that Michigan has been absolutely possessed this year, coming off their first 5 loss season in forever. Their D has allowed, are you ready for this- 74 yards rushing. Not on average. TOTAL. They held an always-powerful Wisconsin rushing attack to under 20 yards last week. That's not a good sign. And after last year's upset, I don't think there's any chance of a trap game for the Wolverines. There's just no way they overlook Minnesota this year. This a revenge hungry team, and the Gophs will be on the menu Saturday night.

MINNESOTA VIKINGS (2-1) at BUFFALO BILLS (1-2), Sunday, noon (Fox)
I'm trying not to be Mr. Negative this weekend, but I think the Bills win this one. They've played three pretty good games, and could just as easily be 3-0 as 1-2. The D has been stout and they've got a good back in Willis McGahee (just ask him, he'll tell you). JP Losman actually completed some passes last weekend, throwing for over 300 yds for the first time in his young career. It'd be nice to see the Vikings score, what do you call those- OH YEAH an offensive touchdown, but I doubt it in a low-scoring slugfest, and you know Ralph Wilson stadium will be rocking because, honestly, what else is there to do in Buffalo? These two are evenly matched, but I see the Vikes sitting at .500 after this weekend. Hopefully I'm wrong.

Come back for more chipper and cheerful analysis next week! Have a good weekend everybody.

The quality of today's Musings will be worse than usual because I am entirely unmotivated today. Bloody hot weather with like 124% humidity will do that to you. So will the complete lack of decent sporting events on TV over the weekend. I actually watched parts of the celebrity golf event in Lake Tahoe yesterday. However it DID provide me with an opportunity to laugh out loud. When Ravens QB Kyle Boller strolled up to the tee, commentator Dan Hicks mentioned that Boller had a new backup in Steve McNair. Really? Um Dan? I think that's the other way around. Boller should keep working on the golf game, because he won't be seeing much football action this year.

* Speaking of unmotivated AND football (how's that for a transition) I managed to preview 2 NFL divisions before realizing I'm not going to finish the preview this year either. Hey I tried, but summer classes keep getting in the way. Who do I hate more: the person who invented the idea of classes in the summer, or me for taking them? You're right, it's me. I'm an idiot.

* So to finish off the preview, here's my predicted order of finish for the other 6 divisions...and I'll throw in the NFC West and South again just for %^&* and giggles. (* denotes wild card)

NFC
West
St Louis
Seattle*
Arizona
San Fran

South
Carolina
Atlanta
Tampa
New Orleans

North
Chicago
Minnesota
Detroit
Green Bay

East
NY Giants (Eli makes The Leap this year)
Dallas*
Washington
Philly

AFC
West
Kansas City (LJ cracks 2000 yds this year)
Denver*
San Diego
Oakland

South
Indy
Jacksonville
Houston
Tennessee

North
Pittsburgh
Baltimore*
Cincinnati
Cleveland

East
Miami
New England
J-E-T-S JETS! JETS! JETS!
Buffalo

* I need help deciding on my 3rd keeper in a fantasy football league. My first 2 are no brainers: wideouts Steve Smith and Terrell Owens. My 3rd is either Willis McGahee or Eli Manning, who I'm convinced makes the Carson Palmeresque leap here in his 3rd season into elite status (well at least until the playoffs when he melts down just like his brother). I have to keep at least one running back, right? RIGHT?

* College football is right around the corner. Remember kids, for the sake of the student-athletes we can't have a playoff system because it would take too much time away from studies. But we CAN add a mandatory 12th game (13 if you play Hawaii), and start games in almost mid-August. No contradiction there. Glad to know they've got the players well-being, and BILLIONS of dollars, in mind here.

* Despite that I"m positively giddy at the thought of college football. Sure my UDub Huskies and the local Minnesota Golden Gophers will be lucky to combine for the 6 wins to be eligible for one of like 98 bowl games, but I'm still positively excited. With Vince Young graduating and like half of USC under investigation, things are as wide-open as ever this year. All the top teams have a ton of talent and plenty of question marks. You have to like West Virginia's chances of running the table, and I think Auburn has a good chance to do the same in an impossibly tough SEC. Still, if USC doesn't lose Dwayne Jarrett for more than a game or two, I think USC returns to the national title game. Remember what happened last time they had to replace a Heisman winning quarterback.

* Is there even a question that Texas will lose to Oklahoma this year? Stoops has beaten UT every year when the talent levels have been close, and now that VY is gone, so are the Horns chances of beating the Sooners. Sure Jamaal Charles and their usual good D will be tough, but there's no overcoming having to start a freshman QB- or having Mack Brown have to outcoach Stoops.

* We're about 2 weeks away from the baseball trade deadline, and there are a grand total of 7 teams that can be considered out of the running (Tampa, Baltimore, KC, Cleveland, Washington, Pittsburgh and the Cubbies). A few more may drop out (i.e. Seattle as long as Hargrove continues to manage and insists on using Carl Everett as his DH. You or I could hit as poorly as C-Rex right now) but there's going to be a lot of teams buying and very few selling. Why can't the trade deadline be pushed back to mid-August?

* Don't look now, but after getting destroyed by the Yankees this weekend, the White Sox have come back to the pack. Looks like we'll have a wild card race after all!

* Finally, my other laugh-out-loud moment from the weekend: watching a preview for Talledega Nights and hearing the names of Ricky Bobby's sons. Walker, and Texas Ranger. HA! Wow I'm dying right now just thinking about that! August 4th can't come soon enough!

Minnesota Timberwolves fans may not want to hear it, but it has to be said: it's time for KG to go. I thought Startribune columnist Jim Souhan put it best last week, saying

"What is wrong with the Wolves, Garnett can't fix alone, and that's his only option if he stays."

I couldn't have said it any simpler. Garnett is in a no-win situation because the roster is essentially locked for his remaining three years on his contract. Thanks to the moves made by GM Kevin McHale, the Wolves are capped out for the remainder of Garnett's tenure in Minnesota, meaning not only can they not add any viable players via free agency, but they can't trade for any either because the guys that ARE eating up salary (i.e Mark Blount, Marko Jaric and Troy Hudson) are virtually untradeable at this point. So what you're stuck with is a team that at its best is good enough for the 7th or 8th playoff spot (meaning you get whipped in the first round) or at worst the 7-14th worst lottery team (and not bad enough to get into the top 5 where you've got a decent chance at landing a high pick).

So basically the Wolves you saw last year are the Wolves you'll see through 2008-- and that's IF Garnett doesn't force a trade before then, which he almost certainly would. Garnett deserves a shot at at title, and there is not only the perfect destination out there for him right now, but it's a place that can also give the Wolves some great building pieces back. Not only that, but a trade for Garnett now is going to net you more than it would say in February before the deadline when everyone knows you HAVE to trade him.

Ladies and gentlemen, the next destination for Kevin Garnett should be: the Chicago Bulls.

Bloggers and fans and even the media often make a common error when suggesting trades: they only look at one side. People like to think you can combine a few of your fringe players together in a big bundle and bring back an all-star. Not going to happen, even with Isiah Thomas still employed in New York (at least until Christmas). Chicago has been a rumored destination for KG for awhile because he spent his senior year of high school there, AND the Bulls have some nice young players, as well as the cap room to absorb KG's mammoth contract without Minnesota having to take back a bad contract to match salaries. The rumors continue to swirl because it makes so much sense for both sides.

First there's Chicago. GM John Paxson has rebuilt the Bulls beautifully with young players and plenty of cap space, but the signing of Ben Wallace earlier this week for a fat salary actually ENHANCES the Wolves bargaining position. With Garnett, plus Wallace as the inside defender and rebounder every team would love, along with uberpoint guard Kirk Heinrich and a bevy of talented wing players, the Bulls are the new favorites to represent the East in the Finals. And although I don't think the BUlls would be better than Phoenix, Dallas or San Antonio, as the Heat showed this past year and the Pistons showed 3 years ago, if you're good enough to get there, even if you're not favored on paper, you can be good enough to win it. Garnett's 31, Wallace is 30, and together you've got a 4 year window for a championship run. Without Garnett the Bulls still have a gaping hole at the 4 spot, and no inside scorer. They're improved, but probably only the 4th best team in the East. And Paxson knows this. The Ben Wallace signing turned Garnett from a luxury to a necessity for the Bulls. No one else makes as much sense for them as he would, and nobody would work as well as he would. He's the guy they now HAVE to have to make the Wallace signing a good move.

For the Wolves? It's the only trade partner that makes sense, as long as you get one thing: Chicago's 1st round pick for the upcoming 2007 draft- and along with it, the right to swap that pick with the Knicks (which you're 99.99999999% guaranteed to do because of how awful the Knicks will be this coming season). Paxson has been very, very, VERY reluctant to include this pick in any deals for anybody. Why? If you haven't heard, the 2007 draft is being lauded by people in the basketball community as anything from the best draft in years to the best in decades. There are 5 bonafide potential superstars expected to declare, the best of the bunch being Ohio State-bound center Greg Oden. Oden has been touted since he was a high school freshman as the best big man since Tim Duncan or David Robinson. After he destroys the Big 10 next year, you'll see that those comparisons are accurate. The other elite prospects aren't too shabby either and would go a long way towards hitting the fast-forward button on rebuilding for whatever team is lucky enough to have a pick in the top 5. And here's the thing: if the Wolves demand that Chicago/Knicks pick be included for Garnett, Minnesota has a very real chance of having not one but TWO top 5 picks next year. That's a helluva way to start the post-KG era in Minnesota.

I did some research on this (thanks to realgm.com for the info) and it looks like McHale wasn't quite as dumb as I'd feared. Although his trade of Sam Cassell AND a conditional #1 pick for Marko Jaric is still one of the worst deals of the decade so far, the Clippers are by no means guaranteed Minnesota's pick for 2007. The pick is top 10 protected through 2011, so if you dealt Garnett, the WOlves would be a very bad team, all but assuring them of keeping their pick. So there's plus what should be the pick from an also very bad Knicks team means the Wolves now have 2 chances at landing Oden in the lottery, or at worst, two picks in the top 6 or 7 of a great draft.

So that pick HAS to be included. Again, Paxson will not want to part with this for the reasons mentioned above, but it just doesn't make sense for Minnesota to trade KG if this pick isn't included. Paxson knows how valuable the pick is, but he also knows the time is now to get KG to make a run for the title, and his opportunity may not be as good if he waits.

IF the pick is included, it's reasonable for the Wolves to get two more guys back. I know a draft pick and two non-allstar players for a guy like Garnett doesn't sound like much for Wolves fans, but hear me out. I've already explained what getting that pick will do, and adding two more from the Bulls young core would be a steal. One of those guys NEEDS to be Tyrus Thomas, the Bulls lottery pick from this past draft. He's long, athletic, and most importantly, the kid works his ass off. The biggest gamble teams have to take on these kids now is whether they're going to be willing to work or not. With most of them you never can tell, but Thomas has been a workout warrior in his two years at LSU, and from everything I've read, that should continue. He's about as safe a bet to be an allstar down the line as anyone selected in the 2006 draft, and if the Chicago had Wallace AND Garnett he wouldn't play much anyways, so he's expendable.

Your third guy is one of the following three: combo guard Ben Gordon, swingman Luol Deng, or swingman J.R. Smith. Gordon was a hot rumor for awhile, and although I really like him, the Wolves drafting combo guard Randy Foye eliviates the need to get BenGo. As good as these two could be, having two guards 6'4 or under in the backcourt would cause you problems defensively. Deng is a Dukie that came out a year or two too early, but is a great athlete, good defender, smart player, and a great kid to boot. He's expendable for Chicago because of how well Andres Nocionni played in the past playoffs. Still, the guy I'd target would be Smith, the 6'6 super athletic wingman who doesn't turn 21 until September. The Bulls just picked him up from the Hornets, as he got into Coach Byron Scott's doghouse and couldn't get out. Still the kid has oodles of potential, and has more of that magical "upside" than the other two. Better still, the kid is getting paid next to nothing, so if he doesn't pan out in his one-year tryout or cops more of that bad attitude, he's still very tradeable because there'll ALWAYS be somebody willing to take a chance on a then 22-year old athletic swingman with a cheap contract.

2006 would be a tough year. Ok, ok, 2006 for the Wolves would be an out and out Gong Show. But if you're not going to make the playoffs WITH Garnett, it'd be worth it to put yourself in this situation without him to be completely unwatchable for 2006-- and then have the best young team in basketball in 2007 and beyond. For the start of 2007 you'd have two high lottery picks who'd be able to make an immediate impact, plus Ty Thomas and Foye with a year under their belt, JR Smith, AND a healthy Rashad McCants. That's 6 guys for 5 spots. Give them 2007 to battle it out, and then package one or two with your remaining gawd-awful contracts for cap relief and role players to fill out your roster. Voila!! In less than 2 years you go from borderline playoff contender with no hope, to burgeoning playoff contender with the brightest future in the league!

You never want to have to deal a player the caliber of Garnett, but if you have to, this is the best you're going to find at turning things around in a hurry. As Jer said, Garnett deserves a shot to win a title, and he'd get it right now in Chicago. The Wolves deserve a new guy running the team, but since they can't get that, a white hot young nucleaus of talent to replace The Franchise is as good as they can ask for.

* Do you think Isiah Thomas is now intentionally trying to sabotage the Knicks? I know, I know you could argue it looks like he's been doing that all along, but after taking Renaldo Balkman (!!!!!) in the first round, I have to wonder. I mean, after all the scrutiny and ridicule he's been under this past season, and after owner James Dolan gave him the "1 Year Ultimatum", has the light finally gone on enough for him to see that he doesn't have a hope in hell of saving his job or reputation? So if he's going to go down, why not go down in flames? I could see him topping off his draft flop by signing Michael Olowakandi to a 5 year deal, trading for Chris Webber and Zach Randolf, and dealing any and all contracts that expire in the next year or two for 5-6 year deals. Nothing is out of the question now for the Knicks for the next 12 months. Knick fans could turn NYC into a scene from the movie THe Warriors by Christmas.

* Nice to see Memphis GM Jerry West has awoken from his coma and is in good spirits. After a masterful job of building a Lakers dynasty, it looked like West had lost it in his time in Memphis. Well last night he returned to his old form, fleecing the Rockets for RUdy Gay and Stro Swift for Shane Battier. I'm still baffled that he pulled that one off. If somebody in your fantasy basketball league tries that deal, it gets voted down in a heartbeat. Yet the ROckets GM thinks it's a good idea. Plus, West adds a quality PG in Nova's Kyle Lowry (everytime I hear the name Lowry I think of Martin Lawrence- remember when he was still funny and hadn't sold out?- saying "Mike LAHW-REE". Maybe it's me) and a decent PF in Alexander Johnson for his post-rotation. I do believe the Grizz just grabbed the first spot in line behind Phoenix, Dallas, and San Antonio in the West.

* For some reason I have a couple of random thoughts about professional sports most boring franchise-- the Utah Jazz (honestly, did you just fall asleep thinking about the Jazz? Bare with me here)

1) was I the only person who thought "wow they didn't take a white guy!!" when they selected Ronnie Brewer with their first pick?

2) If Brewer can stay sane in Utah, he's my pick for rookie of the year. No, I haven't been drinking. Ronnie Brewer will win Rookie of the Year. With either a) a healthy Carlos Boozer or b) a healthy replacement in an offseason deal for Carlos Boozer, the Jazz are a playoff team, with Kirilenko, Williams/Dee Brown at the point (LOVE the Dee Brown pick, BTW), Harpring doing white guy things like shooting 3's and sporting a 1950's haircut, and Memet Okur doing European things in the post like flopping, rebounding, chain-smoking, and growing a bear during timeouts, the Jazz are already a salty team. Now they add the one thing they needed, a 2 guard who can score, and he's going to get plenty of opportunities to do it.

3) the "staying sane in Utah" thing isn't as easy as it sounds. Honestly, if you're a normal dude like Brewer, what the hell do you do in your free time in Utah? Karl Malone survived there only because he's the whitest black man alive, doing things like driving big rigs and playing cowboy. But for Brewer? What do you do if you don't ski,  you like to stay out past 10, and you're really that interested in listening the Mormon Tabernacle Choir? I'm not envious of him, I'll say that.

* I like Cleveland's pick of Shannon Brown. I'm not sure why, considering Michigan State had him, Maurice Ager (another great pick for the Mavs. He could be a Josh Howard/Marquise Daniels type combo guy) and Paul Brown and yet underachieved all year. Still, I think Brown could make a good pro, especially there. Also, would if you're Cleveland, would it make too much sense to deal Big Z to Utah for Boozer? Big Z was a BAD signing last year, I mean as bad as his playoff beard bad. He's slow, he's plodding, and on the bright side he has serious foot problems. And he doesn't fit with what the Cavs want to do. Seriously, wouldn't Cleveland be better off starting Lebron, Brown, Larry Hughes, Donyell Marshall and Side Show Bob and just run the hell out of people? Maybe it's me. You need to get rid of Z's ugly game and contract, and who loves big ugly white centers more than Utah (ok besides Milwaukee)? Maybe it's me.

* It's become a bad joke. You know, the one about how if you're a US high schooler that's 6'10+, you should move overseas and change your name to something unpronouncable with like 17 consonants in it, the NBA will draft you. Well it was proven true once again last night, as unproven foreign guys who have no experience against real competition and would get out-and-out destroyed in college, get drafted in the NBA because they have "upside" and "great length". I'm talking about #1 pick Andrea Bargnani, who got solid minutes in a very good league. I think he was the right pick for the Raptors. I AM talking about the guy my Sonics took 10th, something called  Mouhamed Saer Sene, a 7 footer from Senegal who blocked 19 shots in 18 games in some league in Europe last year, and how just 12 MONTHS AGO learned how to do a layup off the proper foot. And the Sonics took him 10th. Awesome. Even better to me was Portland (who otherwise had a solid draft) taking another 7 footer, JOel Freeland with the 30th pick. Please tell me you saw his "higlight package" when he got picked. He looked like he was playing against junior high kids- and it wasn't like he was dominating them either. Hell this rail-thin wisp wouldn't crack the rotation for a decent US HIGH SCHOOL team, let alone a decent D1 college program. The kid will never play a minute in the NBA, and yet he'll get a 3 year guaranteed contract worth millions. Un-freaking-believable. Seriously, I'm moving to like Belgium or Turkestan and starting a basketball academy for tall American kids. We'll play in the local Thursday night men's league, and I'll leak tape of them shooting jumpers in practice to Chad Ford and the scouts will go crazy over their "outstanding upside" and they'll get drafted and make millions.  And all I'll ask the kids for is a small percentage of their NBA paycheck, which they wouldn't otherwise be getting if they had stayed in the USA and played against real competition, or (gasp!) actually gone to a D1 school for 3 or 4 years. Who's with me?

* other team's drafts that I like (notice the theme of taking players who, oh I don't know, were actually PRODUCTIVE COLLEGE PLAYERS!?!?!?)

LA Clippers- I've already started building my bombshelter, and I'll start moving in supplies over the weekend. When the Clippers win a playoff series, and follow that up with a sensible draft (Paul Davis and Diaz will be good rotation guys at the very least)? I'm not saying the end is near, I'm just saying I'm going to be prepared just in case.

New Jersey- "stole" Marcus Williams at 22 (sorry I couldn't resist), Josh Boone will get minutes, and all Hassan Adams will do is play hard, D up, and dunk on you.

New Orleans- shhhhhhhh- don't look now, but the Hornets are building something pretty nice down there in the Bayou.

Orlando- After getting burned by a Euro last year in the draft, Orlando had the crazy notion to draft proven college players, and my gawd will you look at that! JJ Redick and James Augustine will contribute from the get-go! Will wonders never cease?

 

  

Welcome back to the on-going still running division-by-division NFL Preview. Sure, I should probably be commenting on the NBA Finals, but really The Sports Guy said everything yesterday better than I could have. Dwyane Wade is an amazing talent, but watching him go 1-on-5 and knowing the refs will blow the whistle on Dallas everytime he drives, even if a) Wade is the one initiating contact by jumping into somebody or throwing a forearm out to create space or b)there's no contact whatsoever. Wade's a fantastic player, and apparently I'm alone in believing that he's good enough to not have the refs help him by sending him to the line everytime he misses a shot because MY GAWD if Wade missed he MUST have been fouled!! Anyway, congrats to the Heat for being the NBA 1-on-5 champs of 2006.

Anywho, back to football. The South boasted 3 playoff-caliber teams last season, getting two into the postseason. This year, the Saints could make it 4 playoff eligible teams, but the division will only get 1 playoff team for 2 reasons: 1) 3 of the 4 have some glaring holes that will hold them back, and 2)the schedules are just brutal. In this age of parity, scheduling definitely makes a difference, and not only will these 4 beat up on each other, their matchups with a much improved AFC North will be just as tough. Still, I believe the NFC's Super Bowl representative resides here. Now on with it!

4. New Orleans Saints:
I'm more bullish on this team than most. Drew Bress could be the most important free agent signing in team history, because his impact on the team and community will go well beyond his accomplishments on the football field. Since high school Brees has been cast as the underdog, and it's a role he's relished. After his release by San Diego (honestly, what the hell was GM AJ Smith thinking?), Brees once again has a chip on his shoulder, and joins a franchise and town with ones as well. Yes he signed here for the big bucks, but he also truly believes he can lead this team to a title, and help rebuild the great city of New Orleans. I for one, am a believer. Sure he has no Antonio Gates or Ladanian Tomlinson, but his line and receivers are better, RB Deuce McAllister is on schedule recovering from knee surgery, and didn't they draft somebody pretty good in the 1st round?
WHAT HAS TO GO RIGHT:
Too bad getting an easier schedule isn't an option. They open with 2 of their "easiest" games on the road, at Cleveland and at Green Bay. And no matter what kind of teams they have, the Dawgpound and Lambeau are two of the toughest venues in football. After that week they play a grand total of 3 more teams who had a sub .500 record in 2005: Philly, Baltimore, and San Fran. Best of luck with that one.
Otherwise, they need to get something out of their defense. The D-line looks solid (and it damn well better considering before this year it seemed like they spent a #1 pick on a D-lineman for 200 years in a row), but as usual the back 7 are questionable.
MOST INTRIGUING MADDEN PLAYER: Reggie Bush, HB/WR/KR/PR/
It's not just that Bush is the most anticipated video game athlete (VGA) in forever, it's that he's the first guy who could really truly possibly legitimately challenge video Bo Jackson as the greatest VGA of all-time. Now for those of you who had the honor and privledge of playing with Video Bo back in the day in Tecmo Bowl, well I don't have to tell you that thinking that anyone, even someone as electrifying as Reggie, could challenge Bo's VGA supremacy is a mighty bold statement. But I'm standing by it. If EA does the man justice (i.e. 97+ speed, 473 agility, 875 acceleration and of course 85 hands as well as mid 70's breaktackle), well then I like his chances. And please, when you get the new Madden, change Reggie's number back to 5. It's the least you can do.

3. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
For years the Bucs and their flaming yellow unis were as laughable as the Clippers, Cardinals, and Washington Generals. Since their uniform change to red, black, something called "puse" and like 19 other colors, the Bucs have been known for a great defense, winning, and that big damn pirate ship in the back of the endzone. The defense, led once again by Derrick Brooks (who seems like he's been around since the days of Red Grange), will have to be as feisty as ever, because this is one average offense. The schedule is downright cruel. They've got 6 games within their division, 4 with the AFC North, and 4 with the NFC East (which could be the league's toughest division). Their other 2 games? THe Bears and Seahawks.
Two other random Bucs notes:
* they have a backup corner named Blue Adams. How many times do you think he's heard "You're my boy Blue!"? Not enough, I'd say.
* Watching the World Cup reminds me that somewhere, former kicker Martin "soccer celebration" Gramatica is crying, wailing, and hurting himself celebrating.
WHAT HAS TO GO RIGHT:
A lot. Chris Simms has to do something he's never done as a football player: live up to his vast potential. Joey Galloway at 76 years old (or 35) needs another career year because Michael Clayton's idea of an offseason workout program has been...well not working out, let's say that. Cadillac Williams needs to stay on the field because even though Mike Pittman played admirably in relief of Caddy last year, he's entering that "uh oh" age for running backs at 32, so the wheels could fall off at any moment. Oh and the O-line? Still no better than average. As I said, this team needs a LOT to go right, and I just don't see it all happening.
MIMP: Caddy Williams, RB
Honestly there's nobody here that really intrigues me- well except guard Toni Fonoti, who could be the first NFL player over 500 pounds. Or 600. During those NFL Skill competition shows they should have an eating contest where Fonoti goes against Takeru Kobayashi, the world eating champion who weighs like 12 pounds. Kobayashi (not to be confused with Kobayashi from the Usual Suspects. Boy there's a mistake you don't make twice) would eat like 50 hotdogs in 10 minutes, and then Fonoti would just eat him, and wash him down with a soda. That'd be fun.

2. Atlanta Falcons
The Falcons had themselves a nice little offseason (maybe Bed, Bath & Beyond...I don't know if we'll have time!), trading for underachieving DE John Abrahams, who, if he wants to, could be a bigtime pass-rusher off the edge. Lawyer Malloy can still play as the strong safety, and the Falcons flat-out stole Tech CB Jimmy Williams in the 2nd round. Expect him to be the starter opposite fellow Hokie alum Deangelo Hall by midseason. Offensively, it's the same old story: run, run, run, and then occasionally Mike Vick will try and be a quarterback. Seriously, people, when can we stop pretending Vick will ever be a decent NFL QB (I reached that point at about season 3)? This will be his 6th NFL season, and here's a list of the things he's never done in any one of those years:
* started all 16 games
* completed more than 57% of his passes
* thrown for more than 16 TD's
* had a QB rating higher than 82

He's a helluva athlete with a rocket arm, but he'll never be an effective QB in the NFL. Never. Last season which was the 5th year in a row he was supposed to have a "breakout season" he actually regressed throwing only 15 TD's (19th in the NFL) to 13 INT's for 2412 yards (20th) and a measly 73.1 QB rating (25th). Out of 32 starting QB's in the league his numbers are average. Barely. But hey who am I to burst the bubble of all the Vick Lovers out there? Keep believing that this really IS his breakout year, even though the evidence to support it says otherwise.
Keep on...keep on truckin'. Ok good talk.
WHAT HAS TO GO RIGHT:
Get Matt Schaub on the field because he gives them a better chance to win than Vick does. Seriously. And before you go throwing his meager numbers as a starter at me, there's a reason Hotlanta wanted a 1st round pick for the guy this offseason. He can be a productive QB in this league, and he could be more productive than Vick starting this year. Too bad it won't happen.
MIMP: Deangelo Hall, CB
I know I know I know everybody just loves to use Vick in Madden. BUt for me, I love to use DeAngelo Hall. He's not the biggest guy at 5'10, but his 98 speed and crazy agility, acceleration and jumping always make him one of the first guys I trade for. Oh and he's only 23. Wow.

1. Carolina Panthers
This is the team that could dominate the NFC. The Seahawks finally found an answer to stopping WR Steve Smith, which was make ANYONE else on the offense beat you. This year that won't be so easy. Keyshawn Johnson is a solid possession guy and should make defenses pay for quadruple teaming Smith (it also makes Keary Colbert better by putting him where he should be, as a #3 guy), and when tailback DeShaun Foster gets hurt (the ex UCLA Bruin hasn't played a full season in his 3 years in the league), DeAngelo Williams can step in and actually improve the running game (he SHOULD be starting by the end of the year). The line is very good and Delhomme is dependable and playoff-tested. THe team's only real weakness on offense is at TE, and the fact they somehow didn't manage to draft one of the 17 athletic pass-catching ends in the draft. As Papa Burgandy said to Brian Fantana "That doesn't even make sense." Defensively this is as good as it gets for me. The D-line is the best in football, and the corner tandem of Chris Gamble and Kenny Lucas may be too. And the rest of the guys lining up out there aren't slouches either. This is Carolina's conference to lose.
WHAT MUST GO RIGHT:
Here's some stats from the 2005 regular season to chew on:
Smith had 103 of the teams 269 receptions (that's 38%), 1563 of 3485 yards (45%), and 12 of 25 TD's (48%). No other Carolina receiver had more than 34 catches, 441 yds, or 4 TD's. No matter how amazing Smith is (and he IS amazing!), teams are not going to let him do that to them again. Every team on Carolina's schedule has been watching that NFC Championship tape to see how Seattle finally stopped Smith (which was generally by using 3 or 4 guys on every play against him). The defense and running game are good enough to win the division, but to get to the Super Bowl, the passing game has to be a threat, and that means Keyshawn needs to accept his role as the #2 guy (something he's never had to do thus far), and be damn good at it.
MIMP: Steve Smith, WR
After the Panth beat the Bears in the playoffs last year, here's what I said about Smith:

Honestly, how good is Panthers receiver Steve Smith (12 catch, 218 yds, 2 TD-oh and he ran for another 26 too)?
To paraphrase Red from Shawshank Redemption "the last thing that went through the Chicago Bears heads is how in the hell did Steve Smith ever get the best of them?" It's become a cliche to say that Smith is the ONLY weapon in the Panthers offense, but seriously, when one of the best defenses in football have a week to prepare for him and he not only beats them but DESTROYS them? What do you do with that? What else is the guy capable of? Could he cure cancer? Find Bin Laden? Talk KG into staying in Minnesota? Nothing would surprise me anymore. For the record, Smith IS the only option Carolina has. And for the record, his numbers yesterday were good for half the teams catches, 68% of their receiving yards, and 2/3rds of their TD's. As Ron Burgandy would say "I'm not even mad- that's AMAZING!"

I don't think I was exaggerating. Not even a little bit. The question for the new Madden won't be how good will they make Steve Smith? It's can they make Steve Smith good enough? Remember, Steve Smith has counted to infinity-TWICE!