What really bugs me about celebrities is what they name their kids. I have heard names like Magnus, Apple, Pirate, and Sheppard. And what's funny is those are the good names-at least compared to others: Audio Science, Kyd (pronounced as "kid"), and Moxxy Crimefighter.

Times like these remind me of how much I love my parents. And my name.

Anyway, this got me to thinking "What if sport's stars had kids? What would they name them?"

This is what I got so far:

Ricky Williams: "Bob Marley Williams"-How wouldn't this fit for Ricky's son? His favorite of "sniffin' blue" would spill over to a family member. I can see it now: "Hey, yo! Bobby! Go get us some crack and and we'll jam out to some of your songs! Always like gettin' high with Father Drug. Wait, your'e not the real Bob Marley?"

Pacman Jones: "Roger Goodell Jones"-By the time Pacman has a kid, he will be in so much trouble with Goodell that he will have suck to his Commish by naming his kid after him. He will also have a 6 o' clock curfew, have to do community work 6 days a week, and be isolated from every person in the world by living in a giant bubble. This way he wouldn't couldn't get in fights with people for talking smack.

Barry Bonds (if he has another one): "Henry Aaron Bonds"-Like Pacman, he will be so much hated by the world that he will have to name his kid after Hank Aaron. When Hank is asked about Barry's son, he states: "I won't be at the baptism. I will be relaxing by playing golf or something."

Kobe Bryant: "Kobe Bryant Jr."-Kobe is so self-centered that he will hame his son after himself. Sure, a lot of fathers do that; but that's not all: he will quit his basketball career to in search of becoming the best coach ever, so, in other words, he will coach his son from Kindergarten up. He will be hated by all of the soccer moms and overly hyped dads by this frequent comment: "Where's my assistant? C'mon, man, I'm out here bustin' my butt and you're over there sittin' on the bench. I get no support! Me and Junior want to be traded!"

Michael Vick: "Suck My Vick"-By the time he has his son he will be the most hated athlete in the world. Dog fighting-that's nothing. He will join forces with his brother and wreak havoc on the world. "You hate me, I hate you back!" It won't be long before he says that.

Kevin Durant: "Greg Oden Durant"-He will have to name his son after Greg Oden. Because if he doesn't, he gives the world a reason not to like him as much Oden.

Michelle Wie: "Hilary Duff Wie"-She will explain it all herself: "I thought that like, why not name my daughter after a wicked cool person. I remember watching Lizzie McGuire while I was on the tour, and Hil was, like, really cool in that show, too."

Greg Oden: "Kevin Durant Oden"-Likewise.

I hoped you like the post. Feel free to comment on your own suggestions.