Okay, we've all posted on the need for a definitive way to determine who plays in college football's championship game.  As I look back at the '06 season, I think we need to learn from what worked and apply it to the coming year.  I've toyed with some of these ideas on message boards and in comments on others' blogs, but it's time to set the whole thing down for your discerning input and criticisms.

This past season, after all the games had been played and it was time to decide who would play OSU, Urban Meyer blazed a trail that worked so well I think it should become a permanent part of the process:

THE HEAD COACH PI$$ING CONTEST

 Let's look at how it worked in 2006.  The first coach to start pi$$ing was actually Tommy Tuberville of Auburn.  Fearing another result like 2004, and knowing the difficulty of going unscathed through the tough SEC, Tommy started pi$$ing about the SEC's perceived disadvantages in October.  Unfortunately for him, Arkansas stomped the pi$$ out of him, and he was eliminated from the contest.

Next came Meyer.  Starting a full week before the final vote to determine if Florida would be in, he stood at midfield, split the uprights, and pi$$ed nonstop for four days.  Very impressive indeed.  Lloyd Carr, meanwhile seemed unable to find his whizzer, and waited until the contest was pretty much decided before even beginning to pi$$.  He never had a chance.  Tresell at OSU took the high road, refusing to pi$$ because he didn't want to offend anyone.  The contest produced the desired result, because Florida was obviously deserving of the championship game.

The only thing left to do, then, is to formalize the rules for future years.  First, as HalfBaked suggested, it should be televised, with Flomax as chief sponsor.  "The Flomax head Coaches Pi$$Off."  All coaches would stand at midfield and begin their streams simultaneously.  Points would be awarded for distance, accuracy and volume.  In deference to Pete Carroll, style points would be considered.  Everyone knows Carrol has a flair about him, and I'm sure no other coach would seem to enjoy the contest as much as him.  Also, to pacify Notre Dame, Charlie Weiss would be allowed to move 15 yards closer and pi$$ from the 35.  If he finishes in the top 4 pi$$ers, ND is automatically in the championship game.

Another concern would be drug testing,  How to perform the testing without diminishing the coaches volume would be a critical component, but the last thing we need is charges of someone using pi$$ enhancers.

So there you have it.  The final word in determining the BCS championship teams. Coaches with prostate problems need not apply.