Okay, so you're Sean Avery of the NHL's Dallas Stars, and you've made a career out of being one of the biggest pains in the butt in the entire league. You've played in the NHL on and off since 2001, never scoring more than fifteen goals or 39 points in a season. You have, however, racked up over 1000 penalty minutes, or roughly 16.4 minutes in the penalty box for every goal scored. You're a goon, in other words. A real-life Hanson brother.
So it shouldn't really come as a surprise to anyone that you've been suspended - trouble makers get in trouble, right? But here's the problem: Avery hasn't been taken out of action for anything he did on the ice. He's been suspended by the NHL for being a wiseguy, for ridiculing Jarome Iginla and other players for dating his "sloppy seconds," specifically actress Elisha Cuthbert, among other Hollywood hotties.
A couple of thoughts:
1) If Avery thinks he was the first with Cuthbert, he's even more delusional than he is rude, crude and uncouth. If Iginla's getting sloppy anything, Avery probably did, too.
2) It's a source of constant amazement to me that an idiot like Sean Avery can get any woman to date him, much less someone like Elisha Cuthbert, who is young and beautiful and at least as successful in her field as Avery is in his. Even if it's true what they say about women going for the bad boy, doesn't Avery strike you as representing the outer limits of that theory?
Having said that, I believe the NHL is absolutely in the wrong to suspend this joker. Have we really gotten to the point where someone can have his ability to earn a living taken away, even for a few days, because of something he said; something that was completely unrelated to his job?
Don't misunderstand me, I'm not in any way defending Avery. In my book he's a hurtful lout who apparently suspended his brain before making those remarks. If Cuthbert were my daughter or sister I would despise Sean Avery with the white-hot heat of a thousand suns.
But still, aren't we supposed to be blessed with free speech around here? Isn't one of our founding principles the right to sound like a total jackass if we're stupid enough to do so? Avery wasn't threatening anyone with physical harm, he wasn't shouting "fire!" in a crowded theatre, he simply said something that reflected worse on himself than it ever could on Elisha Cuthbert, or on Jarome Iginla for that matter.
Last time I checked, he shouldn't have his ability to earn a living taken away for that.
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If you love fiction and have a few minutes to spare, check out my website, www.allanleverone.com
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