Doug Gottlieb is filling in for Colin Cowherd.  Perhaps this is just a cursed timeslot.  Doug just used the phrase "...my brother-in-law brought this website to my attention - jumptheshark.com."  He then goes on to explain the meaning of jump the shark.  As far as I'm concerned, the phrase "jump the shark" has jumped the shark.  Doug just did a whole segment on it as if it were a new concept.  I'm sure "jump the shark" will be part of ESPN's next tournament: "What's Now?" 

When I first started to commit time to highlighting sports radio idiocy, I kind of pledged to leave out the callers.  Callers are, in essence, a necessary evil.  They aren't paid to make educated comments.  They are brought into the fold as a way to add entertainment value.  I always wanted to stick to the hosts, "the professionals," as it were. 

But the Michael Vick situation has changed things.  At some point, the volume of idiocy becomes something more than the petty annoyance normal provided by a caller.  So, here are a few themes I've heard in question format, with answers for the reader's benefit:

Would we be treating Peyton Manning the same way if he were in this situation?

I don't know.  To my knowledge, he hasn't been in this situation.  He mooned a girl in college one time.  I don't know if that's the same as currently taking place in a dog fighting ring with possible gambling/mob connections.  But I'm straying from the question at hand.  Yeah we would treat Peyton Manning just the same.  And we wouldn't stop there.  We'd pile on Eli as well.  Peyton, alongside Vick and Brady, is the most marketed NFL player.  There's no way major corporate sponsors could hitch their wagon to the 18 train.  Of course, the person posing the question has all but given their answer, so I don't know what answer could possibly change his mind.

How come we don't universally villify white athlete's the way we have with OJ and TO?

Bill Romanowski, Jose Canseco (Hispanic I guess. I really don't keep a scorecard), and Todd Bertuzzi come immediately to mind.  Pete Rose could be argued.  Look, if you go out of your way to brand yourself (TO, The Answer, King James), you subject yourself to the possibility of positive brand image as well as negative brand image.

Is Michael Vick supposed to cut ties with his neighborhood friends?

We all have choices to make.  Nobody has said, "You're rich now.  Time to ignore the poor people in your life."  Perhaps an agent/coach/parent could have said, "You're rich now.  People will want a piece of you who don't truly care about your well being."  Perhaps they did.  I don't know.  But there are plenty of people who have had suspect upbringings that sort of had an inkling along the way that there are people in the world who aren't living that way, and perhaps their newfound wealth ould be used to ensure that fewer people will live that way.  Curtis Martin and Warrick Dunn come immediately to mind.

Why are we in a rush to judgement to convict him?

The court of public opinion is not a legal courtroom.  The first amendment provides for us to form an opinion, so long as it does not become slander.  Given the fact that Vick has decided to convict himself (plea bargain), there isn't too much that can be said at this point that would be out of bounds.

Those are the Vick FAQs.  I may add more.  Hopefully sports radio can return to inane arguments about A-Rod, that will allow me to return to my funny and poignant form.

 

    

 

I haven't had a chance to post this, but I wanted to do it.  Earlier this week, Steve Phillips was talking about Pacman Jones.  Phillips had Bryant Gumbel on to talk about his recent interview with Pacman.  Phillips then gave us this little gem (paraphrasing due to elapsed time): For all we know, he may be a smart guy.  He may sit at home and do Calculus and stuff.

Pacman scored a 13 on the Wonderlic.  The average NFL player scores a 25.  I'm pretty sure that the average NFL player scores lower than the average of many other professions.  Pacman Jones is half as smart as someone who is a quarter less smart than the general population.  If Pacman can tell me what fraction he is less smart than the general population, I'll personally go on a covert mission to erase his Wonderlic score at 3 am.

 

I just heard one of those sports phrases that makes my skin crawl.  Sure there are cliches.  Who likes to hear those?  But you can't expect much more than that, lest ye provide the opponent with bulletin board material (quickly becoming a cliche in its own right).  I'm not talking about cliches though.  I'm talking about those old sports axioms that have been accepted as common knowledge.  Today on ESPN radio, Kirk Herbstreit (cohost with Mike Tirico for today) just gave us a "the way it's supposed to be played" sighting when speaking of baseball.

Now we all know the inferences made when we hear this phrase.  Heck, Herbstreit elaborated for the benefit of the nine people who have yet to hear of this concept.  Bunting to get the guy over to win 2-1 is how baseball is meant to be played.  I try to be poignant whilst informative, so merely posting a Youtube video of Dr Cox saying "Wrong wrong wrong wrong,  Wrong wrong wrong wronnnnnng" doesn't fit the latter criteria.

Whenever we have heard the name Barry Bonds and the associated word "cheater," you probably thought the inference was steroids.  Wrong!  Barry is just one of many cheaters like Alex Rodriguez, Vladimir Guerrero, Albert Pujols, and Adam Dunn who hit the ball so that the defense can't catch it.  That's simply not fair.  Umpires, out of sheer fear, won't call these batters out for failing to bunt.  It's a crisis!

More over, why win 7-3, when you could win 2-1.  Heck, even if you sacrificed your offensive opportunities and lost 2-1, you could still tell everyone that you played good old smartball.  Before I went to create this entry, I was geared up to read last night's smartball box scores.  Alas, I did not find any.

So I believe I have addressed the poignant portion of today's entry.  Now let's move the informative portion.  Below is a link for a run expectancy matrix.  No, some geek in his mother's basement didn't create this matrix.  This tool comes from data from actual MLB games.  As an example: A runner on first with no outs yields .9 runs each occurrence (so the axiom about walking leadoff men is actually true).  A runner on second with one out (the net result of a sac bunt) yields .7 runs per occurrence.  So you're worse off in terms of runs expected and outs created.  Someone tell A-Rod that he just simply doesn't create enough outs.  It's killing the Yankees right now.

http://www.baseballprospectus.com/statistics/sortable/index.php?cid=204022

 

Colin Cowherd decided to devote today's NFL allotment to eliminating 17 teams who cannot win the Super Bowl.  He made this decision based upon two criteria.  So far, I like this segment, but I KNOW that THIS is the segment that will give me the ammo I need.

So what are the criteria?  Based upon the last 10 winners you must, 1) have a top level defense.  So how does one explain away the Colts defense, you know, the worst run defense since the expansion Vikings?  Well you have to be top level or "hot, and they had Peyton Manning."  Okay so the criteria has gone from:

1)Top level defense to

1A)Top level defense OR hot plus Peyton Manning.  Nevermind the fact that you can't tell a defense is hot until after 5 games or so when you look back and say "Boy they got hot."  How you can predict hot is beyond me. 

I am suddenly less excited about this segment.  Why?  Because there is still another criteria to go.  Imagine the asterisks he'll place on the second criteria.  That criteria being, an efficient quarterback, i.e. One who takes care of the ball.  I guess that's fair enough.  After all, you have to explain away the existence of Trent Dilfer on the list.  But what to make of the existence of a high turnover quarterback like Brett Favre?  Oh you have to make up for it by doing "great things like Brett Favre or Daunte Culpepper."  Huh?!?  Pray tell, what has Daunte Culpepper done in this league?  He had one great year when Randy Moss held up his hand and run under the ball.  He has won nothing! 

But wait, THERE'S MORE!  Why did I hop all over Colin's mention of Daunte?  Well one team he excluded as a Super Bowl contender was the Baltimore Ravens.  Steve McNair is apparently not efficient, nor is he capable of great things.  Using Colin's logic, the Ravens would be better off with Daunte Culpepper at quarterback than Steve McNair.  With a bottom tier running game, here is the Baltimore Ravens QB production for 2006:

Yds 3535, Comp % 62, 21 TD 14 INT, Sacked 17

With one of the league's great young backs, here is Miami's production for 2006 (includes Harrington stats that were better than Daunte's):

Yds 3165, Comp % 58, 14 TD 18 INT, Sacked 36

 Steve McNair has also been league MVP and and AFC champion with 6 playoff appearances.  When did this blog become Steve McNair Just Wasn't Made For These Times?  SMJWMFTT?  Now that's an acronym!