Just slip out the back, Jack.  Make a new Whoops!  That's something else.  If you read a lot of the stuff on this section of bandwidth, you would surmise that I'm a pretty conservative fellow.  I don't much care for the showboating.  If you're going to do it, make sure your team is winning, and that you are, ya know, good at the sport.  I don't buy into the whole "athlete as victim" concept that's emerging.  All in all, I'm a time and place kind of guy.

So I'm not really sure about this Sean Avery suspension.  I'll admit, when I first heard that a television crew was doing something with Jerome Iginla, I thought "Oh please tell me he did not..."  Then I read what he was talking about.  I thought, "that's it?"  Then I saw a link that said "What Avery said to get suspended."  Okay, so the first article was just being nice.  Let's see what he really said.  That's it?  Inappropriate?  Yes.  Worthy of all this?  Not in my eyes.

So hopefully we in the FOX community can find 50 (or more) better ways to get suspended from the NHL.  I'll start with a few:

• Secretly switch your teammates regular coffee with Folgers crystals
• Tell the team chef to hold the bacon on your back bacon and toast
• Create a myspace page designed to hit on Sarah palin called hockeydad99901
• Omit the u when writing to your owner to complain about the jersey colours
• Ask Sergei or Pavel for Anna's number

The bostonfoodclub is into "sloppy seconds"