I feel the drivers need to be more enthusiastic, sympathetic, and understanding when they are slammed into the wall.  I spoke with NASCAR officials pertaining to implementing this new concept-They accepted the propsal-with some stipulations...

NEW RULES PERTAINING TO DRIVERS, OWNERS, CREW CHIEFS, CREW MEMBERS, NASCAR OFFICIALS, SPOTTERS, ANNOUNCERS, SECURITY GUARDS, POLICE OFFICIALS, AND ALL SPECTATORS

1.  Each and every individual that passes through the gate (not passed out) shall be required to show the ticket, ID, BADGE NUMBER, or proof that your butt should be there.

2.  Once proof is shown, all individuals are prescribed (by medical doctors of course-factored in) to take their dosage upon entering.

3.  NASCAR did state they would cut the dosage in half for those children still in kindergarten-they know more than we do and can drive us home.

NEED A BREAK- MY PILLS ARE TAKING AFFECT-BE BACK

4.  All Dale Jr. fans are required to take a double dosage.---NO ACCEPTIONS-MAYBE

THE RULES ARE STARTING TO BE A LITTLE MORE LENIENT NOW

 

 

 

Dang it Dale I told you to take them pills--"I know, I didn't listen"-"I'd be happier."

 

 

 

I want to show you how he reacts with happy pills...

 

 

5.  With happy pills you have a good day at the office-yes-experimental  at the brick yard- NASCAR found that with happy pills, a grown man will kiss anything.

6.  SEE BELOW- The pills do tend to have an effect of conversing with fellow competitors and then making them either your team mate or your driver or your best bud-I really don't think these are rules anymore-

These pills are pretty good

 

I THINK I'M READY FOR THE RAAAACE- ANYBODY GOT A MAGNET??