Welcome to the Boudreaux's Butt Paste Waaahhh Tricycle Race.

Mike Greenspire is conducting a contest to see who can guess the winning team.   Forensic2 will be providing a frame by frame after the race.   Your announcers will be KellyScott!!!!! and StevoinHTown (yer innit ta winit).The race officials will be Lisa H., Hanahan, R L Guido, and Ed Hardiman.  The official photographer is...well, photogr, of course.  The Invocation will be presented by PapaClinchSaint, and the National Anthem will be a "howling" presentation by SpeedBeagle20.  Pop will give the command to "Start Pedaling!"  Noah will be the official flagman.  The open bar is being hosted by Reverend Rhythm and Gambit. 

Qualifying was determined by who could cry and whine the loudest.  JokersWild won that hands down.  However, he was so loud that he broke all the lens photogr had for his camera.  photogr is really mad!  JokersWild is happy...are you?  Each tricycle has a driver and a rider.  JokersWild and fuzzboss are on the pole.  Unfortunately, our racing psychologist, klvalus, had to disqualify a couple of teams before this race.  HR13 and B&R Racing, along with tophatal and Justanotherfan, were disqualified because they tried to enter multiple personalities instead of being a 2 person team.  54fulltiltfulltime told them to "GO SIT IN THE CORNER!"  FENFAN67 will be doing his 999th blog about this race.

Noah has dropped the green flag!  Here we go!  JW and fuzzboss are in the lead.  Wait!  fuzzboss is neck slapping JW!   They've pulled to the side of the track.  Charritt is running to get an interview.  fuzzboss says it is time for a nap.  I guess they are out of the race.  In first place we have slshusker driving with Ulta as his teammate.slshusker is pushing Ultra off the trike!  What?  Ed Hardiman is waving 5 one hundred dollar bills and telling slshusker, "Here's the money I promised for getting rid of the slobermetrics guy!"  Gerrel is telling us that Hardiman can no longer be an official.

In the lead now we have good friends B@O and Dwindy1!  What a team they are.  Oh no!  B@O made a hard left then right.  Dwindy1 is flying down the hill.  B@O is saying something about a blog about Mr. Met and how it should have never happened.  We have new leaders!  It is degraff and YeeMum.  What are they doing?  How disgusting!  They are throwing 'ducks' on the track to block the other racers.  Following them are HotFootLori and TSfanpc.  They are throwing Home Depot gift cards on the track!  The ducks are trying to eat the cards.  This is awful!  What has happened to good sportsmanship?

Well, at least we have Scottstradamus with NBAisWorst.  They seem to be doing well.  Wait!  NBA is yelling that no one can spell and write correctly about this race.  (He is correct about me.)  Scott has knocked him off the trike while yelling, "It's my opinion, so it must be correct!"  Meanwhile, around the track, we have JayJayDean and Tez handing out sheets with stats on them.  WilliamWilmon, DaveinIndy, and BC525 are yelling that F1 and Indy cars are way better than tricycles.  What do they know?  Well, I see that jmayer1843 is joining them.

Back to the race with IowaGirl and 14Falcons in the lead.  Maybe they will finsih the race.  Here comes Ubershorty and TheSizzle trying to pass them.  What a wreck!  TheSizzle was yelling KOBE! and Ubershorty was calling him scarcastic.  They turned into their competitors.  Such a shame!  While elad is walking around with sign that says "photogr for President" and jon464 is shaking his head saying that they are all bad and ugly and they all are going under the bus, we have Moseby75 waiting to present a trophy to someone.

Finally, our last two teams are coming into view.  It is 24x2 and Sweetkena vs Gunaquat and Cboy4ever.  They are neck and neck, wheel to wheel!  Who is going to finally win the race?  Good grief!  24x2 and Sweetkena have pulled off the track to diss the poor sportsmanship and bad attitudes of the other participants.  It looks like our winners are Gunaquat and Cboy!  While Cboy is yelling, "We are America's Team!"  we hear Gunaquat quietly accepting the trophy and the win in honor of "our sweet Southern Belle, Southern Cindi."  She would have loved this race.

NO FOX SPORTS BLOGGERS WERE INJURED DURING THIS RACE!  However, FOX admin will be handing out fines and penalities later this week for "actions detrimental to..."

I have to give credit, or blame, for this blog to HoosierRacer and KLVALUS.  (Hoosier asks all kinds of questions.  KLVALUS has asked nice questions of drivers in the SPRINT Cup Series.)

I was thinking that if I could ask different drivers questions that are not politically correct what would I ask.  (I have to give credit  or blame to photogr for my thinking.) 

The following questions are some that I would ask different drivers off the record.

Kurt Busch--Did that operation hurt your ears?

Casey Mears--Just when did you go through puberty?  What's up with that voice?

Martin Truex, Jr.--How does it feel to be Jr.'s, Jr.?

Clint Bowyer--Was that really your first time in New York City?  You don't get out much do you?

Robby Gordon--So, just how many personalities do you have?

Bill Elliott--Good grief, how many times are you going to retire and when will it really happen?

Mark Martin--Look at the question for Bill Elliott and please respond honestly, will you?

Kasey Kahne--Am I the only one that thinks those Allstate gals are old enough to be your Mom?

Ryan Newman--Well, Rocket, do you have a Wocket in your Pocket?  Isn't it obvious you need something?

Kyle Busch--Have you ever heard of "How to Win Friends and Influence People" and will you use it?

Paul Menard--Whose Your Daddy?

Greg Biffle--How do you think you will like the Yates organization?

Elliott Sadler--You left Yates to go to Evernham mid-season.  So, how's that working for you?

Tony Stewart--Man, have you ever heard of NUTRISYSTEM? 1-800-321-SLIM.

Jeff Gordon--Did you whine this much as a child?

Kevin Harvick--Who has a better chance at whipping Montoya?  You or DeLana?  My money is on her.

Jimmie Johnson--You really didn't know that Knaus was cheating?  I have ocean front property in TN.....

Michael Waltrip--Exactly what were you thinking?  Come on!

Dale Earnhardt, Jr.--Do you think you'll ever have a woman in your life besides your sister?

Carl Edwards--You act up and Mommie talks to Jack three times in one week.  You oversleep and Mommie calls you.  Are you related to Eli Manning?

(Comical Comments Courtesy of:  John Roberts, Randy Pemberton, and Hermie Sadler)

Thanks, guys, for entertaining me today.

1.  "These guys have raised the bar and these guys need to get better in order to compete with these guys."   (You guys get that?)

2.   "When you break a concrete wall you've hit hard."   (Do you think?)

3.   "You can't drive in, drive overtop of somebody, and pass them that way."   (So, you don't drive over the top?)

4.   "Coming up to speed can be just as important as qualifying."   (Racing is about speed?)

5.   "These guys that work on these cars know these parts."   (Thank God!)

6.   "When it comes down to those race teams it's all about the people."  (No robots?)

7.   "Jeff Gordan qualified 3rd, so he'll start in the 3rd position on Sunday."  (Is that how it works?)

8.   "I guess if you guess right on the adjustments you make it's not a guess at all."   (I guess.)

9.   "Kurt Busch is leading this practice right now.  That means he is out front on the race track."   (I hope Kristen understands this highly technical statement!)

10. (Heard about 7 times.)  "These cars are very sensitive."   (I won't say anything to hurt their feelings.)

11. "This Chase has come down to the two top drivers in points right now."   (So, will someone else be in it later?)

12. "You may think it is over right now, but it's not over.  It's not over till it's over."   (You trying to put something OVER on me?)

13. "They're using these practice sessions to get these race cars set up to race on Sunday."   (Really?)

14. "These guys want to keep their guys up front on Sunday during the race."   (You  guys think that is right?)

15. "Dale Jr., probably thinks he has a better chance at a championship going over to Hendrick Motorsports."   (I bet he NEVER thought of that.)

16. "Dale Jr., qualified 35th.  He's concerned he's gonna' have to pass 34 cars to get to the front."   (Let's see now...one, two...)

17. "Okay, folks, this is the end of the first of two practices.  There's going to be another practice later on."   (They sure are smart!)

I'm outta here!  I hope you enjoyed this.

What does "Banned for Life" from NASCAR mean?  Does it mean you will never drive again or does it mean you can have nothing to do with the soprt at all?  I was thinking of Shane Hmiel.  Since he can no longer drive could he be a part of a crew or work for a NASCAR cup team?  I know that his dad spots for Dale, Jr. and works for DEI.  I know his brother is part of the NAVY crew for JR Motorsports.  Could Shane work for one of these organizations or is he totally out of the sport?

Also, what has happened to Kevin Grubb and Tyler Walker?  Are they going through a drug rehab program?  It is hard for me to believe that you can make it as far as these young men did and blow the chance at a wonderful career.

Are only the drivers tested for drugs?  Do any of you know if the crew members or anyone else is tested?

Nothing to do with drugs, but what has happened to Casey Atwood?  Ray "Old Man Likes Young Chicks" sure put a smackdown on his career.

Thanks for any answers you can provide.