To everyone that's supported me over the last year and a half, I wanted to pass along that my articles, from this point forward, can be found over at SI.com. My first article on the Sports Illustrated's site was posted today after this weekend's draft, and I plan to contribute on a more frequent basis.
Many thanks to everyone here in the FOX Blog community for all the support during NGS and beyond. I'll stop by from time to time to see how everyone's doing, as I always do. In the meantime, keep in touch!
Link it over to QuickSlants.com where I'll be running a live blog on the day's tournament action and poking some fun at my own brackets along the way. Should be a good time.
Though I'm still playing with the bubble wrap and tweaking things to perfection, I'm very excited to announce the launch of QuickSlants.com. As soon as I can cure the excessive whitespace issue on the page, I think it's headed for great things.
For the last year and a half or so, the "QuickSlants.com" URL has pointed to this site; however, it will now point to a newly created page that will be the home of all Quick Slants blogging activity. I've got a couple tricks up my sleeve, as well as a few guest postings in the works from some writers you might actually recognize. And if not, please act as if you do for moral support.
Anyway, feel free to check it out. We'll be getting into the March Madness swing of things and revealing our tournament picks, and, GASP, our rationale for said picks long before Thursday's tip-off!
Well, well, well… Peyton Manning finally beat someone from Florida in a big game. He got his ring. He got his MVP award. He shed that #### from his back. We're misty-eyed.
Here at Quick Slants, we are, of course, supremely excited about all this. But not because of any personal accomplishments. Mainly, we're just ecstatic that we won't be force-fed the same regurgitated cudd about Manning ever again! Boo yah.
So, we've already moved on.
More to the point, it's tragic that, once again, the little guys have been overshadowed by the other, more popular Manning-esque aspects of Super Bowl XLI; the elements that made the event unique, comical, and everything in between. In an effort to point out these overlooked Super Bowl nuances and give credit where its due, Quick Slants would like to hand out some hardware to a number deserving parties.
The Head-On “Mood-killing Commercial” Award
To the braintrusts at Snickers, who apparently thought the overwhelmingly male audience would be prompted to buy more candy bars after seeing two male auto mechanics accidentally kiss and then rip off their shirts. Great idea. What’s next? Guys groping a truck? (Oh, had that one too? Thanks, Chevy.) Not since the Head-On commercials have we been this taken aback.
(For the record, we were at a small Super Bowl gathering made up of 100% guys. The response to this commercial was a very awkward silence. We could hear crickets.)
The Mike Martz “Curious Challenge” Award
To Tony Dungy, for inexplicably challenging a third quarter play in which he thought Chicago broke the huddle with 12 men. Despite the fact that this offense did not occur within the first five minutes of the game, this was Martzism at its very finest, essentially donating a timeout to the corporate jackals looking for more commercial time. Hell, we didn’t even think this was a challengeable kind of thing until Jim Nantz confirmed – in his normal, soothing tone, of course – that it really was. For the record, we still think Nantz was full of ####, but we’ll go along with the call on the field.
The New Found Glory “All Downhill From Here” Award
To the marketing gurus that effectively compiled the 2007 class of Super Bowl commercials and batted the very best ad in the leadoff position. Thanks. No really, thanks. With the exception of that first commercial – two guys playing rock-paper-scissors, literally, for a bottle of Bud Light – and the old coots rejoicing over “stronger streams” because of Flomax in the second half, this year’s ads were some of the worst in recent memory. All told, the beer spots were incredibly weak, the soda commercials were remarkably uncreative – is Pepsi still making drinks (or tv ads) these days? – and the spots with animals were just plain stupid. Somewhere, the Budweiser Frogs just rolled over in their graves.
The Jack Parkman “I’m the only player on this team” Award
To teammates Thomas Jones and Devin Hester, who tried their best to win Super Bowl XLI despite playing on a team that apparently had other ideas. Jones was explosive with the ball, amassing 112 yards on only 15 carries; meanwhile, Hester was, well… he did it again on the opening kickoff. You gave it a run, fellas. Unfortunately, it’s hard to win with five turnovers and, more specifically, a quarterback that gives away the ball like it’s a food sample in a supermarket.
The Jim Nantz “Gushing Commentator” Award
To Jim Nantz, for his, well… gushing commentary of Super Bowl XLI. Simply put, Nantz was in the zone, firing on all cylinders and talking about everything from Black History Month to the “interesting” tales of Tank Williams. Yes, Jim, "interesting," to say the least. We were concerned that he’d eventually black out from the excitement during the Lombardi Trophy presentation, standing there, emceeing the festivities, and looking like a giddy schoolgirl. But he managed. And he’s our hero because of it.
On a side note, we were immensely disappointed that Nantz refrained from trotting out one of his patented lines like “Juan shining moment!” or “You can leave it to Cleaves!” That would’ve validated the 12 hours of coverage we drudged through.
The Lloyd Christmas “I was WAY off” Award
To the shoddy weathermen, who inaccurately predicted a 40% chance of showers during tonight’s Super Bowl. Seriously, that wasn’t “showers” or even rain falling from the skies of South Florida; it was the ENTIRE GULF OF MEXICO. Good God. The whole stadium couldn’t have been too far away from being swept away into the Atlantic by rising currents. We blame global warming.
(Bonus points here to the forward-thinking stadium technicians that went the extra mile and opted for waterproof sheathing on all electrical wires. A blown fuse and/or electricution could've hampered the festivities.)
The Scott Spiezio “Exaggerated Soul Patch” Award
To Jim Irsay, the owner of the Indianapolis Colts who might just be the first man to ever grow a soul patch north of his lips. All right, all right… so what if it wasn’t actually a soul patch, but merely just a darker patch of facial hair mixed in with his grayed mustache; we don’t care. We’re giving it some press. That puppy stuck out like a sore thumb.
The Smokey the Bear “Playing it safe” Award
To the NFL, which has now chosen aging, out-o####ate musicians to perform its last three Super Bowl halftime shows in the wake of Janet Jackson’s impromptu peep show. Granted, all three acts featured historically significant artists, and perhaps this is us just being young and rebellious again, but we have a hard time believing that Prince was the best option here. In fact, we’re curious as to who the NFL’s top five selections were for this gig. We'd like to see that list. Couldn’t a more contemporary selection have been made? You know, an artist born sometime AFTER the Cuban Missile Crisis? Apparently not. We’re eagerly awaiting a performance by Tony Bennett in 2008!
The Nick Nolte “Bad Hair Day” Award
To one of our all-time favorite players, Phil Simms, whose puffy hair most closely resembled that of a newly-hatched chickadee when shown in the CBS broadcast booth. We felt bad giving Simms an award levied with the namesake of Nolte’s horrendous hair – on his mug shot photo, no less – but we really had no other choices. Forgive us, Phil. We still love you for your epic years as a Giant, and especially for that cheesy graphic CBS always shows of you throwing a pass into our living room.
The Ron Burgundy “I immediately regret this decision” Award
To Rex Grossman, the beleaguered quarterback of the NFC champion Chicago Bears who looked like he was trying to bring rain – okay, at least that part worked – with the two cans of corn he lofted to Colts defenders. We don’t feel it’s out of line to wonder if Grossman threw these on purpose to help out some old college drinking buddies relying on prop bets for lunch money.
Honorable mention here to our friend “Steak,” who threw the most egregious incompletion of the night when he rifled his Nokia cell phone into a brick wall after the Bears were flagged for running into Adam Vinatieri in the third quarter. The phone is still in surgery. We'll keep you posted.
(You know, I always wanted to give the "Blog This" icon a try. Alas, I've done it, and it was everything I thought it would be.)
For those of you that missed your curtain call, here's the link to my Super Bowl blogosphere report. All told, I was able to incorporate 33 links and 25 different bloggers. Unfortunately, I was not able to include everyone. Maybe next time.
Great job, everyone, and congrats on the great work!
Here at Quick Slants, we're far too rebellious to endorse standard, Vegas-sanctioned Super Bowl proposition bets. Nope, we're not interested in wagering on the point spread (Indy -7), the conventional over/under (48.5) or the sobering long-winded possibility of Billy Joel's national anthem exceeding 1:44. That just doesn't grind our gears.
Indeed, there is plenty of action for the compulsive bettor to examine headed into Sunday's game. But, quite honestly, we feel the creativity of these cookie-cutter propositions is sub-par and lacking the gusto needed to truly enhance your Super Bowl Week experience. That's why we're intervening.
In an effort to provide you, the hungry viewer, with the adrenaline rush you've been craving, Quick Slants has compiled a short list of propositions for your consideration. Hell, we'll even be accepting bets if you're up for it. Our friends in law school have informed us that all winners will be paid a crude form of money constructed of teal Post-It notes and Elmer's glue. Though said currency has only intrinsic value on the open market, we're at least slightly confident that it's more stable than the Japanese Yen.
Please submit all bets by February 4th at 6:00 pm ET.
Jim Nantz uses pet quote at the conclusion of Super Bowl XLI. (3:1 odds)
You might recognize him from such gushing lines as "What a moment!", "A win for the ages!", "There's a new Dean in college basketball!", "You can leave it to Cleaves!", or "Just when you think you can't, you can, and UConn has won the national championship!" Yes, the always-delightful Jim Nantz will be on the call Sunday, and you can feel confident that he'll bring his own brand of flare to the broadcast. In the event of a Colts victory, the smart money is on Nantz saying "It Peys to be a Manning!", "It was do or Addai!" or "It's a photo finish for the Colts!" If the Bears win, the most likely Nantzisms are "It's the key to Urlacher!", "The Bears have struck Gould!", or "Tyrannosaurus Rex!"
Rare stock footage of Manning brothers shown during Super Bowl telecast. (6:1 odds)
We've all see them; the grainy, old, home videos of Peyton, Eli, and Cooper playing in the backyard that look like they were shot by the same guy that recorded Bigfoot wandering into the forest. Astoundingly, there seems to be an endless supply of these tapes, as if the Manning brothers were secretly tracked from birth by Kristof from The Truman Show. If news breaks of a recent security breach at the official Manning Archives -- by petty thieves or G. Gordon Liddy -- you shouldn't be surprised.
Daunte Culpepper arrested; charged with armed robbery; thrown in jail forever (10:1 odds)
Honestly, we didn’t judge poor Daunte for his role in the Lake Minnetonka “Love Boat” scandal – he was just being hospitable. Nope, our minds were made up long before that, perhaps when he hijacked millions of dollars in fantasy entry fees in 2005 like a thief stealing into the night. To top things off, he did it again in 2006, convincing the Dolphins (and fantasy owners) that he was a better fit than Drew Brees. Yeah, that worked out. So, there’s no question that Culpepper has plenty of time to kill this Super Bowl Week, and for the thousands of people out there that lost their shirts because of this guy, we’re hoping he gets nailed for something, anything. And with all due respect to the Miami-Dade Police Department and its lightning-fast marijuana tests, if it doesn’t happen, we’re exploring the use of vigilante justice.
Dan Marino and Boomer Esiason engage in fisticuffs on national television (30:1 odds)
It has to be grating on Dan. Week in and week out. Boomer Esiason, that smug little analyst, and his snappy analogies. Real, frickin’ funny, Boomer. Well, Sunday could finally be Marino’s day of reckoning. We already know he’s got some pent up aggression from never winning a Super Bowl and being reminded about it on a regular basis, not to mention being kidnapped by Ray Finkle back in the day.
When all is said and done on Sunday, we’re looking at roughly 12 hours of having these two guys within a 10-foot radius of one another. This can’t miss.
Fans riot as 60 Minutes postponed until next weekend (10,000,000:1 odds)
We feel this is self-explanatory. Nobody gives a damn about 60 Minutes.
Peyton Manning misses game due to sun poisoning. (45:1 odds)
Consider the following… despite being raised in a southern climate, Peyton Manning has spent the last nine seasons in tropical Indianapolis, a place shielded from UV rays by both the protective bubble of the RCA Dome and the rampant cloud cover than blankets most of the Midwest during the winter months. Even when the sun does make a cameo, its intensity rivals that of a nightlight when compared to the strong beams that cook South Florida on a daily basis. In other words, unless Manning is wearing industrial grade tar as sunscreen, his pasty white skin could be dangerously vulnerable.
Reflective intensity of Michael Irvin's gameday suit. (+/- 1,000,000 candlepower)
Originally, we had planned on associating Michael Irvin’s token line with his abnormally short neckties. (The over/under for length would’ve been 6.5 inches, not counting the bulbous knot.) However, we came to the conclusion that high-powered welding glasses would have been needed to visually confirm the length of said tie, given the luminosity of his shiny suits. So basically, that would've ruined the whole thing. Now, we're just focusing on the "gleam" of Irvin's suits. What started out as a rogue fashion statement has quickly snowballed into a weekly gag. Quite frankly, we wouldn’t be surprised if Irvin showed up wearing tin foil and were launched to the Moon.
(Oh, and for the record, 1,000,000 candlepower is roughly equivalent to one of those handheld, halogen spotlights that you can buy at any local sporting goods store.)
David Caruso over-acts, again; destroys all credibility of pre-game show (2:1 odds)
It happens every year… the awkward combination of celebrities, Super Bowls, and pre-game coverage. Last year, it was Harrison Ford’s dramatic reading of Oh! The Places You’ll Go!, while wearing a diamond stud earring and sporting a patchy, gray beard. This year, we sort of resigned ourselves to the fact that Shaq would be featured in some way, shape or form (hopefully not as part of a Kazaam re-enactment) – that is, until we remembered that CSI: Miami is the top show on the CBS Network! Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourself for an overdose of David Caruso… walking… slowly… to a car. He’s taking off his sunglasses. He’s giving you a smart aleck dissertation. He is the law. And, he still sucks.
Speaking of which…
CBS opts for CSI: Miami-themed pre-game show (12:1 odds)
We’ve racked our brains long and hard here; the only two possibilities for CBS’s pre-game show – besides Boomer Esiason joshing Dan Marino – are Will Smith’s “Miami” song and That Stupid Show With David Caruso. Since we’re not aware of any affiliation between Will Smith and The Eye, our money is on “the most watched network” shamelessly promoting the only show that people actually watch.
Archie, Eli, or any other member of the Manning family shown on national television (+/- 8.0 times)
Inside sources have informed us that CBS will be sending a dedicated, high-definition camera to follow the Manning family from start to finish of Sunday's Super Bowl. While we appreciate the extra effort from CBS, we feel deeply for the poor schmuck that will be relegated to watching Archie instead of Peyton -- that's like being Stifler's younger brother in American Pie II. Trends would indicate this bet to be a surefire OVER, though our oddsmakers feel the allure of the actual game could curb the final tally.
Quality of Super Bowl XLI (+120) versus quality of commercials (-150)
Uninterested wives and girlfriends around the world have been banking on Super Bowl commercials to pull them through the ordeal for years, so being the equal opportunity bookies that we are, we’ve decided to give them a stake as well. Quite frankly, we could go either way on this one, but since the official line is seven points and since we’ve already seen Kevin Federline’s Super Bowl spot, we’re giving a slight edge to the commercials. And yes, this will be the last time Kevin Federline is allowed to sway our opinion.
As part of my ongoing crusade to prove that bloggers have voices, too, I'll be trolling the blogosphere between now and Super Bowl Sunday in an effort to take the temperature of the FOXSports.com community, formulate an article, and give some of the best a little press in the process.
So, if you've got some free time and an opinion on the big game, it's worth your while to sit down and hammer out a few thoughts to your blog!
As we close out 2006, I just wanted to thank you all for your support. Those who have trolled the blogs for the last year know just how much has transpired, namely two Next Great Sportswriter contests. People have come and gone, but many of the originals remain.
Though I've now officially written 21 columns for FOXSports.com, my favorite piece was posted one year (and one day) ago while attempting to solidify a spot as a top 16 finalist in the first NGS contest. Ahh yes, those were stressful days that I will never ever forget. And I could think of no better way of celebrating the one year anniversary of the Quick Slants blog than re-posting a link to it. Ladies and gents...
After writing this scathing article about the Dallas Cowboys and receiving all the requisite hate mail, there was no bigger fan of the Indianapolis Colts on Sunday than myself.
But, I just knew something like this was going to happen to make me look like a horse's behind. In fact, I responded to Victor A. from Waxahachie, TX on Friday with the following line:
"Now that I've officially jinxed the Colts, it's a MORTAL lock the Cowboys will be winning on Sunday. Bet your savings."
Well, well, well...
And now, the moment you've all been waiting for...
I was wrong.
While there are a lot of people out there who I think are overestimating the Cowboys, it's clear that I underestimated them. Like, a lot. Tony Romo is the real deal. Terrell Owens is always a weapon. Julius Jones and Marion Barber III are a solid 1-2 punch. The Dallas defense proved it can contain a top-notch offense. The Dallas offense proved it can come through in the clutch. And most importantly, Dallas proved that it should not be counted out.
There's really nothing more I can say. To all the Cowboys fans that wrote in, you guys were right. I was wrong. Sigh.
I'd write more, but I have to finish eating my shoe.
The following is part 4 of a discussion with NGS II runner-up Bri Moore. You can email Bri at bri_moore@hotmail.com. For previous parts, please scroll down!
Ty Hildenbrandt: You'd have to ask Cashman's shrink how his real mental health is right now. If I were him, my Vicodin addiction would rival that of Brett Favre's and Dr. Gregory House's. I'm just saying that I like the way he's building this team for the future. I like the fact that he hasn't traded any of the Yanks' top prospects and that he's replenished the farm system with young, power pitching.
Call him whatever you want, but at least HE wasn't the one breaking the bank on a pitcher that may or may not translate to the Major Leagues. I think this move by the Red Sox was a little from column A, and a little from column B. There's no doubt that the Sox didn't want Matsuzaka to fall to the Yankees. And there's also no doubt that Theo understood Boston's pitching woes last season. But I think we need to look at this in terms of marketing more than anything else. Boston is looking at this as an investment in the growing Asian market, which might pay dividends in the line of merchandising. I've already seen reports that Japanese companies could buy advertising on the Green Monster. That's where the real value lies -- if you consider a bare bones price of $51-million a value.
Speaking of ludicrous, ridiculous, and mind-boggling decisions, O.J. Simpson has apparently agreed to an unrestricted interview with this network in which he will discuss "how he would have committed" the 1994 killings that he was originally accused of.
(No, I couldn't make that up if I tried.)
Here's the link to the article, you can read it for yourself. I am dumbfounded. Honestly, is O.J. THAT desperate for money that he's turned to role-playing as a source of revenue? Why would anyone ever want to do this? Doesn't it look even more su####ious when you start talking about yourself as a criminal in the third-person? He's also got a book coming out titled "If I Did It." Umm... O.J.? Earth to Juice. Umm... What's the deal here, buddy? He should go to jail for just agreeing to such a stupid idea.
I think I speak on behalf of Americans everywhere when I say that it's time for Tim Meadows to start doing O.J. skits again. It's been a solid decade since the last ones. But now the time has come.
Bri Moore: I’ve been hearing about this O.J. interview all day. And this surprises ANYONE how?
I can certainly see where Simpson would be out of money and need of the attention, seeing as how the Juice has been devotionally searching high and low at every golf course and football game he can find for the real killer.
It’s safe to say that I don’t think he’s role-playing here. A better title for his book might have been “If I Didn’t Do It.”
How do you write something hypothetically and cover it so in-depth, anyway? For example, how detailed is this thing? “If I did it, I was probably wearing a XXL blue t-shirt with a mustard stain from the hot dog I had for lunch the Tuesday before the murders.” I mean, supposedly, there’s a line in there about O.J. saying he’s covered in enormous amounts of blood.
When asked about it by the interviewer, O.J. says something to the effect of ‘Well, I think if two people were murdered, everybody would be covered in blood.’
Um, o.k. Mr. Simpson, if you’d just like to step into this jacket, please…and then turn around so we can fasten these new, fashionable straps, we’ll take you right to your room so you can watch your NFL Films highlight tape.
Can he actually GO to jail? He can’t be retried for the murders, can he? I believe we were taught that by Ashley Judd in a little film called “Double Jeopardy.”
Do you think Pete Carroll will be inviting him back to USC anytime soon? Or is Carroll giving his players the “Don’t answer any calls or take advice from O.J. Simpson, boys” speech today after practice?
Ty Hildenbrandt: You know, in one of Tim Meadows’ famous SNL skits, “Simpson” sits on the witness stand and all but admits his guilt during a fake child custody hearing. He then does a snappy little motion with his fingers and smirks after the judge says that he cannot be re-tried because of double jeopardy laws.
That’s essentially what Simpson is doing here. In the NFL, this would be an automatic 15-yard penalty and possible ejection. And I’m a little alarmed that you’re getting your legal knowledge from an Ashley Judd movie, but I believe you’re right – he’s a free man.
Is there really any doubt at this point that the Juice is a crook? Here’s what I want to know… if someone I love falls victim to a heinous crime, why on God’s green Earth would I ever want to mentally re-enact that scene? How could you possibly think to yourself, “Hey, if I were doing it, here’s how it would’ve been done…”? It’s different if we’re talking about a corporate Continuous Improvement seminar, but this is kind of a big deal. Plus, there are kids involved, which only blows my mind even more.
There is also a rumor that O.J. will quickly spend the $3.5-million that he received for writing his book in order to prevent it from being paid as restitution for the civil suit he lost to the Browns and Goldmans. Again, I’m at a loss for words.
Long are the days of the beloved Nordberg, that’s for sure.
Bri Moore: I remember those Meadows skits! Those were so funny because since he was acquitted, no one ever thought years down the road Simpson would basically admit to it.
You start picking up a lot of informal legal education from Ashley Judd films when your wife picks the movie. According to this report, we’re right—he’s as free as the sample platter at the grocery store. It mentions in this article, as you eluded too, his lawyers appear to be working it out where he won’t have to pay any of the money from the book to the victims’ families.
(Hold on, wait…what’s this POSSIBLE ejection stuff? If Albert Haynesworth can get multiple games for stomping on a player, then certainly O.J. would get a few for a double-murder, don’t you think?)
What I can’t get over is the lack of logic and reasoning behind this “idea” of a “hypothetical” tell-all. Either Simpson did it, or he has given WAY too much thought about what it would have been like; just as you said, it’s a little sick and twisted. Frankly, it only drives those who believe he did it to further convict him in their minds. Forget Nordberg, how can we ever trust Hertz rent-a-car again?
But here’s what I keep thinking, to tie this conversation back to the beginning a little bit: O.J. was the Florida State sideline reporter in that ’93 game against Notre Dame that we were talking about earlier. I have it on tape and watch it every so often to remind myself of the Irish’s last really huge win.
Anyway, that game was played in South Bend—in November. And naturally, it’s cold. So there’s the Juice on the sideline, frantically giving updates on Florida State and its players with furious hand motions. And he’s wearing black gloves. And every time I see it, I can’t help but wonder if those are the gloves…
Ty Hildenbrandt: No pun intended, but I think that glove bit regarding O.J.'s stint as a sideline reporter is a "fitting" way to transition on to another topic. There is nothing I could possibly say to top that.
So, let's wind this thing down. You came up a bit short in NGS II, but still emerged victorious in the sense that you landed a regular writing gig with The Daily Journal in Johnson County, Indiana. In a sense, you are the Clay Aiken to Brandon Vogel's Ruben Studdard, and believe me, I mean that in a completely heterosexual context.
I guess what I'd really like to know is how you were able to spin off your contest appearance into a twice-weekly writing job. I give you a whole lot of credit for making it happen -- it would've been a whole lot easier to put your head in a hole and throw in the towel. But it seems as though you used the whole experience as a source of motivation and made it work in your favor. I'm guessing there are a lot of former contestants out there who'd be interested in knowing more about how much value the NGS competition really had on the open market, including myself.
And looking back to NGS, if you had to do it over again, what would you have done differently?
Bri Moore: Honestly, that’s the first time I’ve EVER been compared to Clay Aiken, and hopefully, it will be the last. If I had to pick between Aiken and Mario Lopez in terms of reality show runner-ups, I’m going with A.C. Slater—at least he’s occasionally linked to Eva Longoria.
You know, of course I was initially disappointed I lost, but that went away fairly quickly because of two things:
First, the better writer won. Brandon was terrific and his stuff was/is really good. Plus, he’s a great guy—we had spoken several times during the final week through e-mail—and I was happy for him.
Second, I was honestly glad the contest was over. My wife and I had just welcomed our baby daughter into the fold at the end of April (on top of buying and moving into our first house) and I was as tired as Randy Moss after attempting to catch a pass. I just wanted to take a couple plays off, you know. As anyone that participated in either of the NGS contests can tell you, the pressure you place upon yourself to come up with something really, REALLY good wears you down.
As far as my writing gig at the Daily Journal and the value of the contest on the “open market”, I think that the two are related. The Journal had done a story on me during the final week after someone had heard about the contest (I grew up in the area) and they told me to keep in touch if I lost.
After a couple of weeks of decompressing, I gave them a call and they offered me a position writing a bi-weekly online column. And it’s great because it gave me a start and I have free reign over what I write about, as long as it involves national sports. On top of that, it has led me to another opportunity to write for a magazine starting in a few months. So the contest really was a springboard to bigger and better things, which is all I really wanted it to be.
And honestly, I know it sounds cliché, but I wouldn’t have done anything different if I were given a mulligan during NGS II. I’m a big believer in things happening for a reason. And I wouldn’t trade what I learned because I think it made me a better writer in the long run—and I had a lot to learn.
Keep up the good work, Ty—I really enjoy reading the columns you and Brandon have put out there.
Ty Hildenbrandt was the winner of the inaugural Next Great Sportswriter contest on FOXSports.com and the host of nationally syndicated Yankee Fan Club Radio. Ty is currently a writer for SI.com.
You might recognize him from such gushing lines as "What a moment!", "A win for the ages!", "There's a new Dean in college basketball!", "You can leave it to Cleaves!", or "Just when you think you can't, you can, and UConn has won the national championship!" Yes, the always-delightful Jim Nantz will be on the call Sunday, and you can feel confident that he'll bring his own brand of flare to the broadcast. In the event of a Colts victory, the smart money is on Nantz saying "It Peys to be a Manning!", "It was do or Addai!" or "It's a photo finish for the Colts!" If the Bears win, the most likely Nantzisms are "It's the key to Urlacher!", "The Bears have struck Gould!", or "Tyrannosaurus Rex!"
It happens every year… the awkward combination of celebrities, Super Bowls, and pre-game coverage. Last year, it was Harrison Ford’s dramatic reading of Oh! The Places You’ll Go!, while wearing a diamond stud earring and sporting a patchy, gray beard. This year, we sort of resigned ourselves to the fact that Shaq would be featured in some way, shape or form (hopefully not as part of a Kazaam re-enactment) – that is, until we remembered that CSI: Miami is the top show on the CBS Network! Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourself for an overdose of David Caruso… walking… slowly… to a car. He’s taking off his sunglasses. He’s giving you a smart aleck dissertation. He is the law. And, he still sucks.
