I will never like Eli Manning.  Under any circumstances.  No.  Matter.  What.  He could set the NFL all-time passing records (unlikely) and I would begrudge him not a thing.  He could win ten superbowls, and still, I would not bedgrude him one ounce of respect.  Why you ask, do I harbor such a grudge for the man who just "Trent Dilfered" himself to a ring?  He will never be more to me than a bum.  Pure and simple.  If the Giants had Phillip Rivers they would have stormed the NFC two years ago. 

Yet Why, you may query again, do I hold such a grudge against one player?  The truth is, I hold many grudges: Texas (in all capacities), The Calgary Flames, Colorado Avalanche, New York Rangers, New York in general, Steve Francis and last, but certainly not least, Bryant "Big Country" Reeves.  But why, why do I dislike Eli above all else?  It is certainly not his hangdog expression on the field that makes you wonder if he is slow, and it is definitely not his grating, hickish southern accent.  Nor is it his theme music (certainly the dueling banjos from Delieverance).  No, not at all.  In fact, it all goes back to a man named Steve Francis and a city called Vancouver.

For my generation, the "I won't play there" game began with Eric Lindros, but for me the most vivid example remains Steve Francis.  Back when he was coming out of University, Vancouver was in the early stages of developing a fine nucleas of promising if as yet unspectacular, young players.  The Antonio Daniels debacle was over.  We needed an exciting point guard to push the ball to Big Country and Shareef Abdur-Rahim.  We certainly got the man we needed when we drafted Steve Francis aka "Stevie Franchise".  Then, he killed all the Grizzlies fans when he stated, "I will never play in Vancouver".  This guy, this guy, who had just been drafted into the league was making demands.  He should have been happy to play anywhere, the inmates do not run the asylum.  He said "no" to Vancouver.  What he did was completely devalue the entire franchise and make players who were out there giving their all, like Shareef, feel terrible.  Being Canadians we didn't do much, but had he said that in a US city?  He would have been punched repeatedly, and deserved every second of it.  When he failed to win in city after city, I cheered, always a little louder.  It is nice to see when guys like that get their comeuppance.  I mean, sure he's a multi-millionaire but he's never won anything more important than a scrabble match.  And that makes me smile.  His attitude makes me and I hope others, respect a guy like Chris Bosh even more.  He plays as hard as he can for the team that drafted him, and has been richly rewarded.  The team has seriously developed and got a star (TJ Ford) who actually wanted to go there!  Will wonders never cease? 

So, then, the reason I hate Eli Manning is because he did the same thing.  He said "no" to San Diego.  He traded on his name, as he has his entire career, and forced a draft day trade.  It is not right.  He was the first overall pick, and yet acted like it was the worst moment of his life.  What. A. Tool.  Worse still, San Diego went on to succeed while he failed, but this is a huge slap for them, and in the face of a very nice, and talented young star: Philip Rivers.  Athletes can be prima donnas, but what Eli, Eric Lindros and Steve did was absolutely, morally wrong.  Hold out for more money, leave after three seasons, take the money and play for some team wherever you want, but go where you are drafted and be damned happy about it.  Teams have to stop giving into the demands of unproven players, and the players have to learn to play where they belong.  That is what free agency is all about!  And now Eli's defence won him a Superbowl.  Oh well, has anyone seen Steve Francis anywhere? 

Viewers are dropping hockey faster than water through a sieve, something drastic has to be done to bring in new fans.  The NHL is trying, they really, really are.  New streamlined jersey's come out next year.  Sidney Crosby is almost 1/30th as overexposed as Peyton Manning (*note: That's still alot).  Gary Bettman needs a new approach.  It is getting drastic, as some sportswriters have predicted the potential folding of the NHL within the next 15 years.  So, without further ado: I have a suggestion that I strongly urge the NHL to take into consideration.  Add a 7th player to the ice for each team, and equip him with a eight-foot wooden lance.  Stick a hockey glove at the end of the lance and off we go!

Now, before you stop reading, hear me out.  A player gets a breakaway, he is skating down the ice without fear when...suddenly he is taken out from nowhere by an eight foot lance with a hockey glove stuck at the end ( for cushioning the blow).  The playing field has officially been levelled.  The days of the dominance of the Red Wings is over!  Having a lancer would be great because it would allow hockey to keep the lovable goons who are quickly becoming antiquated in the kinder, gentler, post-lockout NHL.  George Laraque could play for another ten years.  Tie Domi could make a comeback (watch out Rona Ambrose!).  Better yet, the game would become more unpredictable than Mike Tyson hanging out with Dennis Rodman.  Announcers would have to get used to the change, but saying "Federov gets lanced from behind!" would probably make up for it.  So please, NHL, do something.  Do something drastic!  We need the NHL because it is truly a joy to watch the hardest working athletes around (Try playing basketball with knives strapped to your feet).  So consider my plan NHL owners, coaches and fans.  The time for drastic is rapidly approaching.  If the lancers catch on we can go to part II of my plan to save the NHL...blindfolded lancers. 

I feel old today, at the ripe age of 23.  I feel old today for two reasons; sportswriting has changed and Jake Plummer retired. 

My father always told me that when players you remember from their university days retire, you will feel old.  I remember a young stud leading Arizona state, working his magic with reckless abandon.  His name; Jake Plummer and it seems like just a few years ago.  It seemed like he was still a young guy, but now he is a grizzled (have you seen that beard!) vet, out of the league at 32.  Wow.  I hope he unretires and plays for the Texans fast, so I do not have to go into a retirement home.

Secondly, sports writng has changed irreconcilably.  Now people from the new ADHD culture want lots of flashy boxes and pictures instead of, gosh, sportswriting!  Words, people, words is what "sports writing" is all about.  Please, do not let this art form die!  The days of Gary Smith and Frank Deford are past, and when they retire, Sports Illustrated will hire no one of similar caliber to replace them.  Pretty soon an entire article will be encapsulated in a small box and these words; "Carson Palmer is playing like his old self thanks to some help from his teammates and wife".  Then there will be a large picture.  I dread that day and you should too.  It needs to change now.  Right now.  Please write to Sports Illustrated and tell them you want more Gary Smith, more articles beyond the game, not just useless flash.  Although, not many people will still be reading at this point, do not let sportswriting die.  Let's all feel young again and have a few pages to look forward to.

The San Diego Chargers lost this weekend.  The Ohio State lost last week.  Florida won two NCAA titles without being the consensus number one in either sport all season.  New York has been defeated time and again.  So have the Detroit Red Wings.  Last season Indy lost to the Steelers.  The season before that the Steelers lost.  Where have you gone wire to wire champion? 

No team that wins a championship is the wire to wire champion anymore.  Take Ohio State, they had the consensus number one team in the national all year.  They beat Michigan, and had the runaway Heisman winner.  Then they lost.  Sound familiar?  It should.  The previous season USC did the exact same thing in their loss to Texas.  The Yankees and Tigers both lost last season in the baseball playoffs.  The Mets were the team to beat all year and they could not get through.  Come to think of it, when is the last time that the runaway team of the year actually won the championship? 

College basketball?  Not quite.  Florida, a team that was not even number one in its own conference, won.  In the NBA, the Pistons were the team to beat on one side, with the Suns and Spurs on the other.  Who won?  Miami. 

Even hockey is not safe anymore.  The days of the Detroit/Colorado dominance are done.  Teams keep sneaking through to knock off the best regular season teams.  Ottawa got a harsh comeuppance despite being the favorite last season.  In the NFL the Steelers were a wildcard entry and they beat just about everyone to take the title.  The intresting thing with them is the year before they were hands down the best team in the league.  They lost.  In the following year, they won.  If that pattern repeats you can just go ahead and crown Indy the champ.  It just does not appear to pay anymore to be the team at the top.  Teams are having a great deal more success sneaking into the playoffs and then upsetting all the perennial contenders.  Case and point, the Carolina Hurricanes won the Stanley Cup.  The Florida Gators are national champions in two sports and the Steelers who won the Superbowl last season did not even make the playoffs this season with virtually the same team. 

Do not get me wrong, this is the single greatest thing to ever happen in the history of sports.  No one is safe.  When the Yankees, Red Sox, Red Wings, Colts, Buckeyes, Patriots, Pistons win it is boring.  We crave the upset.  Everyone wants the underdog to win, not hear another speech from Tom Brady about how his teammates inspired him to great heights.  No sir.  We want to see a hook and ladder, wide reciever pass and statue of liberty within five minutes of one football game.  We need to see some guy who has waited so long to win get his chance.  Or some young kid with his whole career ahead of him standing before us with a deer in the headlights look.  Most know they will probably not repeat this miracle again.  So keep it up gods of sports.  Keep shocking us by knocking off number ones.  Although I think you may have spoiled us just a little bit with that whole Boise State thing. 

Two incredible feats were accomplished in the past week, one set a record that appeared to be able to withstand the test of time, and the other shockingly broke it.  The two oldest hitters in baseball history both had their at-bats in the same week.  They were both over eighty...and they had a professional baseball-at bat.  A pattern has emerged and it has nowhere to go but down.  Imagine if you will;

Owner: How old does that guy in section 10 look?

Manager: Maybe, sixty?

Owner: Too young, hell, Julio Franco is way older than that!  Find me a guy who needs oxygen just to take two steps.

What if other sports choose to follow the example of baseball?  These guys may be in great shape for their age, but I do not think one should throw a pass in the NFL.  Can you picture some wise gentleman needing his depends when Bryan Urlacher comes barrelling down on him?  Or Pat Riley subbing some ninety-year old for Shaq to shoot a free throw?  Age is relative but in athletes it goes to the extreme.  Most careers are over by mid-thirties and often they have severe health problems by 40.  Players will never be able to play longer because the size and brutality of the game is always going to keep up.  Players are going to get meaner, stronger and faster. 

These old timers could get seriously hurt up there against the supermen who play today so some rules need to be in play.  Instead of a minumum age there should be a maximum one.  For the NFL it could be 55, for basketball 75 seems an appropriate number, baseball you can play forever and for the NHL it should be set at Gordie Howe.  These guys are living their dream late, but what if one of them actually did something that changed the game?  Like smack a homer or (gasp) actually hit the ball?  The stadium would have a collective heart attack.  Not to mention the poor man who got up and took his cuts only to watch an older guy take his record away.  Well, I guess its something to work for.

 

Althletes are completely expendable and totally replaceable.  Like the modern business world, sports thrives on the constant upgrade and frequent downsizing of althletes.  It just happens to be to a much higher extreme than at your local accounting firm.  Rarely, outside of George Costanza, does one get suddenly traded to the other side of the country in the middle of a Sunday.  It happens sure, when you move to another office with the same company, but in sports it goes so much further.  Families are uprooted at the drop of a hat.  Teams are torn asunder by the whims of the owner, coach and general manager.

No one is safe from the onlslaught of the trade deadline.  You could be the best pitcher in the world, or the top point guard, but if something of better value comes along then you had better pack your bags.  Teams have been completely dynomited overnight, the core shipped away in a series of neat little 2-5 player packages.  Take the Vancouver Canucks and Florida Panthers, as some would argue that was a stupid trade.  I'm still on the fence.  There is a feeling that too much was given up for Luongo, who had to leave his wife and home and was just tickled about it, but it was necessary for the team to unload Todd Bertuzzi.  Bertuzzi for his part was totally relieved to be traded.  He gets a chance at a fresh start in a place where the hockey market is almost non-existant.  A team like the Canucks needs to detonate and cut loose most of the core players.  Bertuzzi, Markus Naslund and Brendan Morrison at one point formed the best line in the league.  They failed to pull the Canucks out of the mire of the West and lead them to the promise land of a Stanley Cup victory.  The Canucks were more than willing to part with Bert, but losing Alex Auld was a mistake.  He at times single handedly kept the Canucks in games, and he was still learning to be a great goalie.  With the luck of the ex-Canucks goaltenders he will go on to become a star. 

A bigger part of trades is exposed, as in many cases it is just a temporary stop gap that covers major problems.  Chris Pronger led the Oilers to Game 7 of the cup but he's on his way out already.  Many times it is like placing a band-aid on a gaping head wound.  The 76er's got Chris Webber but all he did was implode the team chemistry.  Happens to the Yankees all the time.  Amazingly enough, most of the teams that trade to become stacked end up losing in the end.  The Ottawa Senators, Yankees, and the Jail,er Trailblazers of the late 90's, all failed to win anything.  More than anything people want instant results that they are not going to get with quick trades.  For the Canucks and their newly signed goalie, I'm hoping it works out.  As for the incredibly complex European soccer mega-deals, those trades I am not even going to begin to touch. 

Everyone chokes at one point or another in their professional sports career.  Entire teams choke sometimes.  Often more than one player seizes up at a crucial juncture and the entire game turns on their mistakes.  So why is it that we make such a big deal out of it?  Yes, Phil Mickelson choked, but what about all the times he tried really hard but didn't make a gaffe?  And Tiger, he missed the first cut of his pro career.  I bet he felt like a giant weight was lifted off his shoulders.  It can be analysed a dozen ways and a dozen times  but it should not be dwelt upon.  He is mortal, despite what Nike commericals say.  We all are.  That is why an athlete choking is good, because it reminds us all that we are the same.

There have been many memorable chokes over the years, and I applaud them all.  Bill Buckner was a great one, as it kept the Red Sox and their fans in a state of perpetual agony for the next dozen or so years.  Chris Webber was another classic example when he infamously called for a timeout that Michigan didn't have.  In an eerily similiar scenario Josh Howard recently suffered a mental meltdown when he forget where he was and also called a timeout he shouldn't have.  This mistake unfortunately opened the floodgates for the Heat who went on to claim their first title.  That is precisely what is wrong with sports.  Howard had until that point played a fantastic game, he played well the following game, but he will always be known for twice calling for timeout when he shouldn't have.  Nick Anderson was a good finals example when he missed four straight free-throws to finish off the Rockets in game one of the 1994 finals.  The Rockets swept. 

Everyone makes mistakes at some point in their careers.  Nascar drivers dnf, Michael Jordan missed more game winning shots than he made, John Elway had some comeback drives stopped by errant passes and Mariano Rivera who is as close to perfect as they come lost his famous control against the Arizona Diamondbacks who beat the Yankees.  Teams too can be known for choking.  These teams are referred to often as "choke artists" and include but are not limited to; Italy, Argentina, England, The Chicago Cubs, White Sox (for the most part), Vancouver Canucks,LA Lakers without Shaq, Red Sox (for the most part), Indy Colts (prove me wrong Peyton, prove me wrong), and LA Clippers. 

Choking is good, because it gives the fans something to talk about and sportswriters something to write about.  Choking breeds hard work, as Michael Jordan said in a Nike Commericial, "I have failed numerous times, and that is why I succeed".  It makes winning all the sweeter and losing all the easier.  When there is someone to blame it takes the focus off a poorly run organization or star players and their lack of production.  More than anything it takes the pressure off players for just an instant and reminds us all that it is okay to screw up.  There are exceptions of course as if you are in Columbia, own goals are often punctuated with six gunshots to the chest.  In most of the world you are allowed a few slipups without being mortally wounded or fired.  Not true, however if you are an NFL kicker.  And no, Latrell Spreewell, your kind of choking is still not acceptable.

 

 

There is a trend in sports right now that is playing out to incredible results.  Teams that were supposed to win championships the year before are suddenly grabbing them now!  It has happened in basketball where last year the Heat were considered the favourite in the Eastern Conference.  They didn't make it to the finals, but were instead pushed aside by Detriot.  Last night, a year after they were the undisputed best in the NBA's regular season in the East, they raised the Championship trophy.  It gets weirder.

Last year, the Pittsburgh Steelers were 15-1 and picked by many prognosticators to come out on top of the NFL in the playoffs.  They got close but a horrible performance by Big Ben against the Pats left them with a sour taste in their mouth.  This year, after getting into the playoffs by the skin of their teeth, the boys from Steeltown won the whole show.  Their opponent, the Seattle Seahawks were picked the year before to win it all by Sports Illustrated.  They didn't, until this year when they came so close. 

This theory does not cross all borders though, as it does not apply to the NHL where the favourites have the distinction of being knocked out early in the playoffs year after year.  Or baseball where as long as the team makes it to the playoffs they can win, provided of course they are from the American League (excluding all Florida Marlins). 

More than anything it proves that despite the free agent frenzy, good teams take time to come together.  Owners and General Managers constantly want winning results. The fans practically demand it.  When players do not know the guy who has the locker next to them, or do not want to get to know him for fear he will be traded, it is the wrong approach.  The world of sports has suddenly taken an ADD approach to everything, shipping players around before they have a chance to become great together.  Teams rarely stay in rebuilding mode for more than one year (excluding all Kansas City Royals, Florida Marlins, Arizona Cardinals, Portland Trailblazers and Columbus Blue Jackets).  The pressure to win is superceding all, and is ruining great teams down the road.  Who knows what great combinations we are missing out on?  Players are so rarely becoming big with the team that drafted them it is shocking.  Society and our lack of attention span is partly to blame, so is the fruitfull financial offerings of a winning club.  Hell, Steve Nash was drafted by the Phoenix Suns, shipped to Dallas, and then resigned with Phoenix where he has become a megastar, but that one does not count.

 

Steve Nash has made a major impact on the game of basketball and the majority of it has been felt in Canada where suddenly anything is possible.  You could argue that he has changed the way people think about basketball, again proving how slick fundamentals will eventually always win out over flashy showmanship.  Or you could argue that he has changed the way Canadian kids think about basketball and where they can go with it.  Or you could argue that he has saved basketball in Canada particularly in BC where the void left by the departed Grizzlies seemed to large to originally overcome.  All of these arguments are totally valid, yet Steve Nash won't ever admit to any of them.

Modesty has always been the best quality displayed by the hardworking Nash and it is in sharp contrast to the typical "me-first" attitude so commonly shown by NBA stars.  Nash does not even walk with a swagger, he bounces along.  He is so uncomfortable in interviews that he always seems to be thinking about the quickest way off the television screen.  Most athletes love being in front of the cameras, and proclaiming how great they are.  Nash defers always to his teammates, both on the court and off.  Well, that is not entirely true.  After the injury to Amare Stoudemire, Nash put the team on his back and carried them to the number 2 seed in the West.  His fantastic numbers from the year before?  He improved them.  He improved his numbers passing to two guys with the first names Raja and Boris, who sound more like Slavic diplomats than NBA players.  Before Nash they played more like Slavic diplomats as well.  Shawn Marion is a good player on his own.   When he plays with Nash he is a great player. 

Nash saved Canadian youth basketball and gave aspirations to thousands of kids who see him living out their dream.  When the Grizzlies moved to Memphis they left behind the Jr. Grizzlies League, which was a great place for kids to go and shoot around.  When they left, so did all the funding.  Steve Nash stepped in with his chequebook open and now the Steve Nash League is a great place for kids to learn basics and shoot around.  The impact he has on Canadian basketball is far greater than just monetary.  He has thrown down the gauntlet and it is being picked up all over the country.   His example has kids waking up at six in the morning and running to school, shooting for an hour, running home to grab some clothes and then running back to school to start class.  He has kids who believe that they can be the "next Steve Nash".  Everyone is taking basketball more seriously in BC, including major US college scouts who pepper the bigger tournaments.  More great athletes are getting opportunities because they are dedicating themselves to the ideal that Nash presents. 

More and more Nash is being seen as an anomaly, but that is not the way that he would prefer to be seen.  As much as he has helped Canadian basketball succeed, the cold hard truth is that one Canadian has achieved NBA Superstardom.  To become great, a Canadian has to be not only the best player in Canada, but also able to beat maybe 80% of the great players in the Sates.  That is not an easy task.  Most of those who have tried after Nash have had their dreams shattered, and have returned to Canada to play for Canadian Universities like Kyle Wilson and Pasha Bains to name a couple.  It is possible that one person who pushes themselves harder because of Nash will make it big, and that will make it more than worth it for the ever smiling Canuck.

 

Kobe Bryant is once again on the losing side of things in the NBA playoffs and this should come as no great surprise.  In his entire career the only time that he has been able to do anything is with someone else leading the way.  All the flowery praise and endless tribute that is heaped upon him should be replaced by the large number of doubters that continues to grow daily.

I've never liked Kobe, and I never will.  He's always struck me as too arrogant, too talented and to be frank; too fake.  He alienates his teammates, never passes the ball, forced the retirement (and subsequent return) of one of the greatest coaches in NBA history and has turned potential stars into his warped vision of the perfect running mate who always defers to him.  Ever since he came into the league he has done nothing but say the right thing while meaning the complete opposite. 

Kobe is without a doubt the most talented player in the NBA, but that is where it stops.  He cannot will a team to win a series like Lebron, or control every facet of the game like Steve Nash.  All he has ever wanted is to be remembered as the next Michael Jordan, but he will not get his wish.  Kobe will always be the first Kobe, an example of what young NBA stars should not aspire to be.  Sure he's not a convicted ####, but I'm sure his wife isn't exactly the most thrilled person with him, and he cost himself tens of millions in endorsement deals but at least he's not languishing in a prison in Colorado.  He must have payed that girl a tidy sum that probably allowed the former hotel employee to start her own chain.  Kobe may go on to great things and be the most dominant player in the NBA but he will never be as great as he thinks he is or hopes to be.