Life wouldn’t be much fun without your friends. It would be even worse without baseball. In honor of the best series on television and the best sport in the world, I present to you Baseball’s Best Entourages. I used "Entourage’s" four main characters- Vince, Eric, Drama, and Turtle and matched them up with baseball players who most accurately resemble their characteristics on a respective team. Let’s first look at the qualities that make up each character on the show.

Vince role: The leader of the pack. He is popular with fans, dresses well, and can do no wrong.

Eric role: The brains behind the operation. He is smart and always in control. Makes sure that his star gets big results.

Drama role: The elder statesman. He is a little "out there" and extremely temperamental. Is used to overcoming diversity.

Turtle role: The class clown of the crew. He is youthful, keeps the mood light, and is up for anything.

 

New York Yankees

Vince: Derek Jeter

Eric: Mariano Rivera

Drama: Alex Rodriguez

Turtle: Johnny Damon

What Vince is to Hollywood, Jeter is to New York. The team captain and all-around heartthrob is the most popular player in pinstripes. Alex Rodriguez will always be living in Jeter’s shadow and his recent string of horrendous D isn’t winning him many new fans. The flamboyant centerfielder, Damon is new to the crew but keeps the levels of seriousness in the clubhouse to a minimum. Much like Eric in a meeting with Ari, Rivera is all about business. When he enters the game in a save situation, he will not disappoint.

 

Oakland Athletics

Vince: Barry Zito

Eric: Rich Harden

Drama: Milton Bradley

Turtle: Eric Chavez

What Drama is to bashing a car windshield with a golf club in Malibu, Bradley is to smashing a beer bottle in front of fans at Dodger Stadium. An uncontrollable temper is something these two definitely don’t hide. Zito has the boy band looks and carefree attitude that drives the women crazy. As Vince is counted on to bring home big pay checks, Zito is counted on to bring home lots of wins. Chavez is the one Athletic who hasn’t bolted via free agency. Like Turtle, Chavez is comfortable where he is at. As long as he is getting paid he will have a smile on his face

 

Boston Red Sox

Vince: David Ortiz

Eric: Curt Schilling

Drama: Manny Ramirez

Turtle: Jonathan Papelbon

Curt Schilling is one of the most calculated pitchers in the game. He is always prepared and very sharp on game days. He is rarely out-pitched and keeps the games close so his star hitter can come through with some clutch RBIs. Manny Ramirez, who once was the star of the Red Sox, comes up big from time to time but is too unreliable to trust day in and day out. Like Drama going in for an acting audition, you never know what to expect out of Manny. Papelbon is a guy who will always get a laugh out of his teammates. As if cutting his hair like Rick “Wild Thing” Vaughn from the movie Major League earlier this season wasn’t a hint.

 

Anaheim Angels

Vince: Vladimir Guerrero

Eric: Francisco Rodriguez

Drama: Garrett Anderson

Turtle: Jared Weaver

Vince’s breakout role in Queen’s Boulevard is reminiscent of Guerrero joining the Angeles. Prior to this, Vlad was caught in the baseball purgatory that is Montreal. People knew he was good and that he had the potential to be a star, but he needed to prove it on a bigger stage. Since arriving in LA, Guerrero has become a perennial MVP candidate and one of the biggest draws in town. Garret Anderson’s career has hit a rough patch of late. After numerous injuries slowed him down, this former hitting machine still shouldn’t be counted out in clutch situations. With Rodriguez coming in at the end of games, the rest of the crew is in good hands.

 

Cleveland Indians

Vince: Grady Sizemore

Eric: Victor Martinez

Drama: Aaron Boone

Turtle: Travis Hafner

With one big homerun in the playoffs versus the Red Sox, Boone became a star much the same way Drama did with his role in Viking Quest. They both have underperformed since, but will always have that one moment to look back on. “VICTORY!!!” Sizemore has become the most popular player in Cleveland. Still a youngster, he has been the catalyst for the team in the batter’s box and in the field. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that his female fans have established a “Grady’s Ladies” fan club. Without all of the fanfare, Martinez has been the most consistent catcher in the American League the past few years. He keeps the team in control and produces daily.

 

New York Mets

Vince: David Wright

Eric: Billy Wagner

Drama: Pedro Martinez

Turtle: Jose Reyes

Wright is the epidemy of Vince. He is young, good looking, talented and carefree. His performance thus far in his career has been nothing short of amazing. Like Vince after starring in Aquaman, Wright is ready for a follow up. Did someone say World Series? These days, no one knows what to expect out of the eccentric Martinez, but when push comes to shove this guy will have your back no matter what. Reyes is the little guy playing second fiddle to the stars. He doesn’t get as much hype as some of his teammates, but when he gets the chance to have the spotlight he doesn’t disappoint. See: Turtle getting Saigon a record deal.

 

St. Louis Cardinals

Vince: Albert Pujols

Eric: Chris Carpenter

Drama: Scott Rolen

Turtle: Jim Edmonds

There might not be a more genuine man in the game than Pujols. Like Vince giving Eric a Maserati, Pujols takes care of those close to him. And like Eric, Carpenter might have trouble accepting the gift. But if he turned it down, you can bet Edmonds would be there to rub it in his face. As long as Edmonds gets to drive once in a while, he is content not leading the show. Rolen doesn’t mind not driving; he doesn’t care how he gets there as long as it leads him back to the top of his game.

 

Los Angeles Dodgers

Vince: Derek Lowe

Eric: Greg Maddux

Drama: Jeff Kent

Turtle: Andre Ethier

Kent is about as awkward as Drama at a Playboy Mansion party. To say his social skills are lacking is an understatement. He might try his best to fit in, but he still sticks out like a sore thumb amidst the younger crowd. Lowe has the part of Playboy partier down pat. Last year he and his wife divorced after Lowe admitted to having a relationship with one of the Fox baseball anchors. Sounds a little like the Vince/Mandy fling on the set of Aquaman to me. Maddux is the doctor that keeps Lowe in check. He doesn’t get sidetracked by the hype, and will keep his younger pitchers’ heads on straight. If you don’t recognize Ethier’s name yet, it’s okay because this kid continues to just go about his business.

 

Houston Astros

Vince: Lance Berkman

Eric: Roger Clemens

Drama: Brad Lidge

Turtle: Craig Biggio

Clemens is as serious a guy as there is in baseball. He is as serious as Eric in a ####. That focus it what drives him to the top of his game, and like Eric he expects results. His teammate Lidge still expects results but his stuff, like Drama trying to act suave, just isn’t working lately. Biggio might not be young anymore but he is still young at heart. His signature dirty batting helmet is as recognizable as Turtle in a Yankees hat.

 

Philadelphia Phillies

Vince: Chase Utley

Eric: Tom Gordon

Drama: Jimmy Rollins

Turtle: Ryan Howard

With Bobby Abreu now out of town, Philadelphia is Utley’s town. He is currently in the midst of the hottest hitting streak of his career and showing no signs of slowing down. Unlike Warner Brothers with Vince, the Phillies better hope they have enough money to convince Utley to stick around when his contract is up. Rollins and Howard remind me of Turtle and Drama at Sundance. I bet they would be bugging and competing with each other the whole time. Hopefully they wouldn't end up with the same occupational hazard that Turtle and Drama encountered.

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