Leading up to the start of The Open Championship at Royal Birkdale, the world of golf questioned how much excitement would be generated in a “Tiger-less” environment. The PGA would quickly brush that talk away, listing plenty of names who could help carry the torch until Tiger’s triumphant return. After watching big names such as Phil Mickelson (1st round 79) and Ernie Els (1st round 80) stumble out of the gates, we waited for someone else to help carry the load.

The PGA got just that, but the man who emerged was not one that anyone was expecting.

While we waited for a lefty with a smooth swing, a tall righty nicknamed “The Big Easy”, or a Spaniard sporting vibrant colors and a kid-in-a-candy store type mindset, a shark was lurking in the tall grass at Royal Birkdale.

Not just any shark, but “The Shark”.

Greg Norman, at the ripe old age of 53, was back in contention at a major championship.

Norman wouldn’t stop there, pushing his way to the top of the leaderboard after 54 holes.

That is when everything began to become all too familiar.

With every missed fairway, the flashbacks began to become more clear. With every missed green, the images of 1986 – and final day leads on all four majors – only to win one… emerged. With every putt that lipped out on Sunday, we became entrenched in the memories of the horrific collapse of Norman’s 1996 Masters – where he lost a six-shot lead on the final day.

The record kept skipping, allowing for each Norman collapse to come into the clear – seven in all.

We could feel the eighth one coming. The three consecutive bogeys to open the final round of The Open Championship made the future easier to see.

Yet, making the turn to the back nine, Norman managed to hold a one-shot lead. While Norman continued to struggle, the blustery weather conditions wouldn’t allow for anyone else to pull away.

As a result, we held hope. We pushed for history to unfold before our eyes. A 53 year-old - who hadn’t finished in the top 10 of a major this millennium – was right there.

The Claret Jug was his for the taking.

Only… he didn’t take it.

Instead, it was Padraig Harrington who seized the day – and the Claret Jug, after an electrifying finish that vaulted him to a four-shot victory over Ian Poulter.

Left in the dust once again on a major championship Sunday was Greg Norman.

For a weekend, we witnessed Greg Norman’s return to glory, only to watch him falter yet again. Only this time, the majority didn’t feel for him quite like that Sunday over a decade ago.

Maybe it was because at age 53, he wasn’t supposed to be here. Maybe we could see it on his face – that he was at peace with his performance and pleased with a tie for third place once the tournament was over. Maybe knowing that he had new wife Chris Evert to comfort him made things OK.

Just like that… our own honeymoon with “The Shark” was likely over. This time for good.

Our memories of him will likely only come back once we visit a Reebok store - to see his colorful logo hung across store walls - or maybe at a liquor store as we stumble upon the Greg Norman wine label. Sure, Norman has earned an invite to Augusta (for finishing in the top four at Royal Birkdale) – but do we honestly think he will make the cut?

Maybe any or all of the above is true – or maybe it’s something else.

Perhaps we feel cheated. History was there for the taking - a story brighter than anything Tiger could have presented us with was right there… only to be blown away in the wind that howled through Merseyside, England as the championship came to a close.

This was supposed to be Greg’s day… again - but it wasn’t. Instead, it was Paddy’s day – times two – and I’m left feeling nothing but a little bit of déjà vu.

Now that Tiger Woods has actually lost a tournament, can we move on to the next topic? Perhaps this was a simple ploy to bump up some possible sagging ratings in the world of golf. Maybe… maybe not. Either way, Tiger’s perfect season is gone faster than John Daly can say “Where’s the beer tent?”

But how perfect was it?

While Tiger’s early season run was impressive, was the hype really warranted? Anyone can have success when they take significant time off to pick and choose the tournaments they want to play in. You don’t think that Tiger wants to take shots at the courses that fit him better than others?


Go ahead and argue that every course fits Tiger, because he’s simply a machine. He’s a robot with ice in his veins. Nothing phases him. Fine, I get it. Still, even the superhuman Tiger Woods has courses he prefers over others. It’s true. For that reason alone, I would have never counted it as a “perfect season”.

There are pro golfers out there that compete in every tournament. A perfect season is winning every golf match during that year. Not picking and choosing which ones you want to play in, all the while allowing extra time for additional preparation and rest (for the majors, of course). You don’t see the New York Yankees choosing to only play the Baltimore Orioles, Tampa Bay Rays, and Kansas City Royals during the baseball season, while dropping the Red Sox, Tigers, and Angels... and allowing prep time and rest for the playoffs.


Still, the media continued to plug that perfect season. But hey, that’s today’s media. The same media that coined the term “Tiger Slam”, when Woods won four straight majors, even though one happened to be during a different season, therefore not officially making it a Grand Slam. The same media that will highlight Tiger coverage even when the golfing superstar is in 86th place.

Certainly, Tiger Woods is the headliner at the PGA’s weekend concert… when he shows. He’s one of the best ever… if not the best. He’s the one that most fans come to see. He’s earned it. Heck, there is probably a large sampling of fans that drive their Tiger sponsored car to a tournament he's playing in, sporting Tiger Woods apparel and also chugging down an electrolyte-filled Gatorade Tiger.

With all that being said, the "Tiger Spotlight" has become more ridiculous than ever. And now that we’ve dropped the perfect season talk for this year, let’s move on. Let’s instead look forward to The Masters. Go ahead and list Tiger Woods as the obvious favorite, but discuss others that could make some noise too.

But who am I kidding, that wouldn’t be the perfect story.

Nothing is perfect… I should know that by now.

Never out of season, it’s time to break out the tomatoes once again, and direct them at the individuals in sports that deserve them the most. As always, there certainly isn’t a shortage of suitors in my eyes.

Where do you direct your tomatoes this week? Here’s where I feel mine are most deserving:

Throwing Tomatoes – Volume V

NFL

McFadden “Haterade” Drinkers
…can you say “Adrian Peterson Part Two”?
Reports exist that Darren McFadden ran a 4.33 40-time during the NFL combine. Anyone want to consider letting him drop in the draft now? I get why the Dolphins don’t want to take a running back. They have Ronnie Brown and a boatload of other needs. Therefore, if I’m Miami, I trade out of the number one slot and get multiple picks to build the franchise back up. The team dealing with Miami can take McFadden #1.

Chicago Bears
…for their recent signings.
Let me get this straight, one complaint after another about how the Bears need a quarterback, yet they resign both Kyle Orton and Rex Grossman? Is anyone else confused?

Matt Ryan’s Draft Position
… and where he falls.
Honestly, he seems like a solid enough player, but I just don’t see Matt Ryan as a number one pick. I don’t. I’m no draft expert by any means, but if you ask me, I don’t see one single elite QB in this year’s draft.

College Basketball

Duke Blue Devils
…and exactly how good are they?
Recent back-to-back losses to Miami and Wake Forest leave us questioning how good these Devils really are. Is this a Duke team destined for another early exit during March Madness? Only time will tell.

MLB

Tampa Bay Rays
…for even having internal discussions about signing Barry Bonds.
Let your young talented core gel, while also getting some significant time on the field.

Jeff Borris (Agent for Barry Bonds)
… for making a comment that “Japan certainly is an option” for Barry to play next season.
If so, I think Godzilla may have some competition, considering how big Barry is.

Boston Red Sox
… for signing Bartolo Colon to a minor-league deal.
I understand the fact that he is a low risk / high reward signing. What I don’t get is why the Red Sox keep blocking players like Jon Lester and Clay Buchholz from pitching in the majors. If you aren’t going to let these young guys pitch, then why not trade them away for Johan Santana a few months ago?

Florida Marlins
…for hosting auditions to create a new dance team made of all large males.
Very large males. What’s that? No, that wasn’t the sounds of tickets being sold, that was Oscar Mayer trying to buy some real estate at Florida’s stadium.

Randy Johnson
…for staying in the game.
Something tells me that the 44 year-old version of Johnson would just be playing pitch and catch with this bird (see below). He’s a baseball legend, but I think he should have hung it up a few years ago.



Pedro Martinez
… for bragging about dominating the league during the steroid era.
Why open your mouth Pedro? Who is to say that you never did any illegal performance enhancing drugs? While no one obviously has any proof, perhaps you were simply never caught. Sure, it’s all speculation, but why draw the attention to yourself during a time when steroids are the hot topic?

NBA

Phoenix Suns
…after the Sunday night home court beatdown they took against the Detroit Pistons.
As for newcomer Shaq? Try 3 for 8 from the field and 1 for 8 from the line… sounds like no “sun” at all, but instead mostly cloudy with a chance of a tomato…

Dallas Mavericks
… for not being road warriors.
Has anyone else noticed that the Mavs are 14-16 on the road? They either need to hope that Jason Kidd can help get them that top seed in the West, or they need to learn to play better on the road.

Conference Inconsistency
…within the NBA.
The Western Conference is a battle right now, with the top seven teams all within three games of each other. Over in the East, the 76ers hold the 8th spot with a record of 25-32. It’s nothing new, but still… Yikes!

Miscellaneous – Golf

Stewart Cink
…for not even showing up during the Accenture Match Play Championship Final.
Seriously, Cink never stood a chance against Tiger Woods. Heck, the Miami Heat may have more of a shot against the NCAA’s top teams. Zing!

Golfweek on Tiger
… and discussing Woods possibly having a perfect season.
A perfect season to me is when you win every match or event of that season. Take the Patriots, who went undefeated during the NFL regular season. Tiger Woods skips a number of events. If he can go through the entire PGA season (like many pros do), I would call that a perfect season. Otherwise, let’s not go there. He’s on fire, but he won’t sweep his events in 2008. Mark my words.

Honorary Tomato Throwers of the Week
Because those who found success earn a chance to sling one at their opposition

Tennessee Men’s Basketball – for knocking Memphis from the ranks of the unbeaten.
Congress – at Roger Clemens
Carl Edwards – at the NASCAR field after winning the California 500.
Cleveland Cavaliers – at the East after adding major pieces in a blockbuster deal.


This has been “Throwing Tomatoes”… I hope you have some Tide stick handy.

Sex sells… especially on Valentine’s Day. In sports, it’s no different. With that, I give you a list of some of the sexiest valentines, taken from a variety of sports, but all likely to be on the minds of many as Valentine’s Day approaches.

Sports' Sexiest Valentines

Amanda Beard – Swimming

Jennie Finch – Softball

Tanith Belbin – Figure Skating

Gretchen Bleiler – Snowboarding

Natalie Gulbis – Golf

Danica Patrick – Auto Racing

Maria Sharapova – Tennis

Amber Stackhouse – Snowboarding

Niki Gudex – Mountain Biking

AnaPaula Mancino – Volleyball

Kristi Leskinen – Skiing

Heather Mitts – Soccer

Annika Sorenstam – Golf

Jelena Dokic – Tennis

And last but certainly not least in the slightest bit…

Allison Stokke – Pole Vault


Photo Credits: EXPN, FHM, Sports Illustrated, anapaulamancino.com, among others...

Whether you’re the nicest person on the planet, or the exact opposite, there is no doubt in my mind that either way, you have a list of pet peeves that drive you absolutely insane. Not just in life, but in sports too. Certainly, there are those little things in sports that drive us nuts. There’s simply no sense in hiding them anymore, no matter how nice you are. Fine, if you’re not going to, then I am.

Here is a sampling of my own personal pet peeves… in life and in sports.

KP’s Pet Peeves in Life and Sports

• People who eat loud.

• The BCS.

• Coaches that don’t ever go deep on 2nd and short.

• Coaches that blatantly run up the score on opponents.

• Highly paid baseball players that do not run out ground balls.

• In a similar regard, players that stare down home runs at the plate. Run it out! >>
  

• The NBA traveling rule (or lack thereof). If I were an NBA player, I could walk to the North Pole and back and not get called for traveling.

• Tailgaters (I don’t mean the ones that eat and drink at sporting events – that act is encouraged).

• Cars who drive with their turn signal left on.

• Cars who blow through red lights at crosswalks… especially when I’m in them.

• Overblown sports stories… can you say beating a dead horse? Vick, Pacman, and Clemens are all examples that come to mind.

• Commercials that torture my brain with catchy jingles, thinking I’ll go buy their product because of it (e.g. that Jeep commercial… “rock me gently, rock me slowly…”).

• A sporting event with one sponsor, yet that sponsor tortures us with the same commercial over and over again.

• Actors that think they can act (e.g. Brendan Fraser).

• People who don’t cover their mouth when they cough or sneeze.

• People that don’t refill the ice cube tray, yet still place it back in the freezer.

• Bandwagon Fans

• “Ballhogs”

• Bad NFL Rules (e.g. The Tuck Rule a few years back).

• Homer fans that don’t admit they got a break on a bad rule (see “Tuck Rule”).

• Baseball’s lack of a salary cap

• People who pee on the seat

• Crybaby athletes

• Fans who cheer injuries

• Candlepin bowling – what the heck is the point? You couldn’t get a strike if your life depended on it. If you’ve never heard of it, you aren’t missing a thing, except for maybe, the pins.

• People who don’t wash their hands in the restroom at work… or anywhere for that matter.

• Exorbitant player salaries (maybe I’m just jealous) >>
  

• People who walk slow, and as a group take up the entire crosswalk while doing so

• Did I mention the BCS?!

• People who don’t clean up after themselves

• Expensive stadium food.

• Cheaters

• Cheaters that gloat after beating you.

• People who give the “#1” sign when on TV, when they’re team is 100th or so in the country. Why are you always number 1? That’s the best you got?

• People who cut in line.

• People at the gym who hog machines, especially when they are socializing with others and not actually working out.

• The NFL overtime rules – maybe we should think about testing the college OT system?

• Hideous throwback jerseys (not all of them are, but some… my goodness). >>
  

• People that answer their cell phones in movie theaters.

• People who feel they need to scream into their cell phones in order to be heard. It doesn’t work that way people!

• People who sue for silly reasons such as burning yourself with coffee.

• People who stand right behind you when you’re trying to get money out of an ATM. It’s called space people!

• Slow golfers
  

• Golfers that don’t repair their divots.

• Golfers that don’t rake the sand traps (especially when my ball is in a foot print).

• Players that come in and out of retirement. Make a decision and stick to it.

• Players on the field that celebrate a great play, yet their team is getting blown out at the time.

• Players that retract their verbal, decommit, and choose a new school.

• Players that showboat.

And finally…

• Tardiness – sorry for adding this one in so late.

Now that I’ve gotten some of those off of my chest, do you have any to add?

I recently had an interview with Punxsutawney Phil, who is the famous groundhog that informs everyone whether there will be a prolonged winter or not.  According to the tradition, on Groundhog Day (February 2), if Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter.  If Phil does not see his shadow, an early spring is expected. 

As it also turns out, Phil is quite the sports fanatic.  He mentioned that whether he sees his shadow (or not) doesn’t just predict the weather.  Phil informed me that not only does him seeing his shadow determine the weather forecast, but it also tells us a great deal of sporting results for the upcoming year.  What are they?  Well, you’re in luck, as Phil has authorized me to pass along a few of these sport related results over to you.

Today, Punxsutawney Phil did NOT see his shadow.  Once again, that means that we should expect an early spring this year.  Thankfully we will not see an additional six weeks of winter.  Well, thankfully to some, but likely not the avid skiers.  In addition, Phil also passed along that NOT seeing his shadow ALSO means the following:

 

0 additional wins for Anna Kournikova

(We didn’t need Phil for that one – I told him I think she retired anyway – He said “Who cares, we have Sharapova”)

 

1 more year for Brett Favre

(Damn, he’s good…  that was just announced today – He wouldn’t tell me if the Pack would make the playoffs though)

 

1 more hitter in baseball batting .400

(He refused to tell me who, when, and for which team – I joked it would be Bonds going 4 for 10 with 396 walks)

 

1 “Missing Person Sign” with David Duval’s face on it

(Not sure if this was a joke or not – Phil sure has a mean poker face)

 

1 more chance for Coughlin to succeed in New York

(He said the guy was lucky to get that opportunity)

 

1 top draft pick saved for the Philadelphia Flyers

(“Easier than shooting fish in a barrel” he said)

 

1 more Caddyshack sequel, with him starring in it

(He promised me NO Jackie Mason this time – I swore him to it and told him it was a gopher in the movie, not a groundhog – He didn’t care)

 

2 more double-digit win streaks for the Phoenix Suns

(He described them as “filthy” – he meant it in a good way though)

 

2 additional weeks of injury for Grant Hill of the Magic (Poor guy is keeping the Orlando medical centers in business)

 

2 more tangles between Pedro Martinez & Don Zimmer

(We had a good laugh over this one – Ahh, “Zim”… the spirit was willing)

 

3 more consecutive victories for Tiger Woods

(He said he was “earning his stripes” – I told him that joke just wasn’t going to cut it)

 

3 more complaints to hockey officials by Brendan Shanahan

(He offered some cheese with his “whine”)

 

4 more teams tanking NBA seasons in order to increase chances of drafting Greg Oden

(I also inquired about Kevin Durant, believe me)

 

4 more free agents signed by the Chicago Cubs

(He asked if they had already received permission to expand the team roster – that usually doesn’t happen ‘til the playoffs)

 

5 more tackles for Brian Urlacher in Super Bowl XLI

(That “filthy” word came up again, and I agreed)

 

5 more accusations directed at Barry Bonds

(“’Nuff said” was his response to this one – I just nodded and smiled back at him)

 

6 more weeks of jail time for the “Jailbird” Bengals

(Ditto to the Bonds response – We both agreed that we feel bad for Carson Palmer, Marvin Lewis, and the Cincy fans)

 

7 more dropped balls for T.O. next season

(He wouldn’t tell me for what team though, no matter how much I begged)

 

9 million additional luxury tax dollars for the New York Yankees (He said the Red Sox may catch them if they keep trying to trade for big dollar veterans)

 

11 more assists for Sidney Crosby of the Pittsburgh Penguins

(He told me the ‘Pens were back – I asked if the Pens would always be back to Pitt… he didn’t answer)

 

13 more consecutive winning sets for Roger Federer

(I asked him if he would be the best ever, he wouldn’t answer that one either)

 

17 more goals for Alexander Ovechkin of the Washington Capitals

(He said eventually this guy would lead the Caps back to the playoffs… and soon)

 

 

19 additional at bats for Sammy Sosa

(He made some joke about this making it a grand total of 21 for the season)

 

21 more yards rushing for Joseph Addai in Super Bowl XLI

(He said he is one of the untold stories of the Super Bowl, and that the focus has been on many others)

 

42 additional missed free throws for Shaquille O’Neal (He said the guy needs to start shooting underhand)

 

That is all the information that Phil was willing to give me unfortunately, but he did mention there were more locked in his vault.  Maybe I can get more out of him next year.  He also informed me that these numbers do not always mean exactly what the team or individual will have by year’s end, but instead that “him not seeing his shadow” has affected the overall final numbers in that way.  Quite uncanny, I must say.  I never knew the little guy had so much power.  Never get on his bad side that is for sure!

 

Finally, I bet your local Meteorologist can’t provide numbers like that!  Next time you are looking for sports news and local weather, give Phil a call.  Then again, he also wanted me to mention that his number is unlisted.  Good luck anyway… and Happy Groundhog Day!