First-team All-Americans, Heisman award watch
candidates… all rubbish.
Borrrrring. Let’s instead focus
on the elite college football players that are doing their best to flush their
futures right down the toilet. That’s
right football fans, more and more, we keep seeing talented players getting
into the news for all the wrong reasons… so much in fact that one could easily
form up a starting roster that could compete with the team that played on “The
Longest Yard”. Honestly, it’s sad how
often this is happening in college sports today. It really is.
Recently, reports of misconduct in college
football keep pouring in, practically on a daily basis. Heck, the SEC alone can give us a starting
lineup chock-full of college football delinquents.
With that being said, I give you the “SEC
All-Penal Team”…
2008 SEC All-Penal Team
Quarterback
Starter: Ryan Perrilloux – LSU
Offense: Used brother’s ID to get into casino,
plus a federal investigation in which he’s a person of interest in a
counterfeit ring, nevermind his latest undisclosed transgression.
Backup: Stephen Garcia – South Carolina
Offense: Keying a professor’s car, as well as
failing to obey orders of an officer of the law.
3rd Stringer: Jared Foster – Ole Miss
Offense: Transfer quarterback whose previous rap
sheet include alcohol possession by a minor, and contributing to the
delinquency of a minor, while in high school.
Those charges were dropped if he agreed to assist with a steroid
investigation, as well as stay clean.
He was later charged with selling steroids, and has since been kicked
off the team.
Did Roger Clemens deny knowing him too?
Running Back
Starter: Brandon James – Florida
Offense: Possession of a controlled substance
(less than 20 grams of cannibis)
Backup: Arian Foster – Tennessee
Offense: Disorderly conduct and underage alcohol
consumption
Fullback
Starter: Fred Munzenmaier – Georgia
Offense: Underage possession of alcohol and
walking in a roadway
Backup: David Holbert – Tennessee
Offense: Underage consumption of alcohol and
disorderly conduct
Wide Receiver
Starter: Dion Lecorn – South Carolina
Offense: Marijuana possession
Starter: Ahmad Paige – Tennessee
Offense: Misdemeanor for marijuana possession (a
freshman offensive lineman – William Brimfield – and a high school student in
town for a recruiting trip, were both present in the car during the act)
I heard the recruit also gave his verbal to the officer
that night. Apparently, they also have to get their recruits stoned, in order to sign them?!
Backup: Gerald Jones – Tennessee
Offense: Misdemeanor for marijuana possession
Offensive Lineman
Starter: Ronnie Wilson – Florida
Offense: Firing a semi-automatic rifle in the air
during a dispute that began at a nightclub.
Eventually charged with aggravated assault, battery, and display of a
concealed weapon
Starter: Anthony Parker – Tennessee
Offense: The All-SEC first teamer was recently
arrested for disorderly conduct.
Starter: Zhamal Thomas – LSU
Offense: He was kicked off the team due to a
burglary charge.
Defensive Lineman
Starter: Marcus Harrison – Arkansas
Offense: Felony possession of ecstasy.
Starter: Jeremy Elder – Alabama
Offense: Arrested on two counts of first-degree
robbery.
I heard he was also a steal in the recruiting
process…
Defensive End
Starter: Jermaine Cunningham – Florida
Offense: Disorderly conduct, after a dispute over
a bag of potato chips at a restaurant at 2am.
You can never eat just one, can you?!
Starter: Brandon Deaderick – Alabama
Offense: Disorderly conduct, and an altercation outside of a
bar.
Linebacker
Starter: Brandon Fanney – Alabama
Offense: Arrested for disorderly conduct in front
of a bar.
I wonder if he was playing with his “fanney”…
Starter: Derrick Odom – LSU
Offense: Breaking and entering into a residence
Backup: Dustin Lindsey – South Carolina
Offense: DUI
Defensive Back
Starter: Donovan Baldwin – Georgia
Offense: DUI at 3:05am
Starter: Troy Giddens – LSU
Offense: Second-degree battery and one count of
battery (on his teammate, by the way), while his previous rap sheet also
includes identity theft and simple burglary.
Safety
Starter: Antonio Wardlow – Tennessee
Offense: Disorderly conduct, underage
consumption, and public intoxication
I think we should call Phillip Fulmer “The Warden”
from now on…
Backup: Jamarca Sanford – Ole Miss
Offense: Disorderly conduct at 1:40am
Kicker / Punter
Starter: Britton Colquitt – Tennessee
Offense: Numerous alcohol related arrests,
including the latest in which he drove into a parked car (while intoxicated).
I sense some irony here, considering all the alcohol
drunk by a “booter”… if you catch my drift.
Backup: Kyle Keown – Vanderbilt
Offense: Domestic violence and aggravated assault on his ex-girlfriend
There you have it, the 2008 SEC All-Penal team. Something tells me that high school-kid-turned-Tennessee-recruit may be headlining the 2009 squad. All in all, this list is quite alarming.
KSP: I love it, really I do. In fact, you must have read the USA Today article on this very subject about Tennessee? I'm guessing? I was thinking the same thing myself, but EVERY conference, let alone school has their own demons. As HARD as this is to say, the SEC will get picked on as long as they are on top.
By the way, are the Penn State players still picking up trash in Beaver Stadium after games due to 'indegressions' of player conduct off the field? Be careful when you point fingers. Be VERY careful.
Hey! I'm sad you didn't include the Big 12. Texas A&M -- sadly my school -- has one FB player indicted for manufacture and distribution of HARD narcotics.
While Texas had a ton of players arrested, the SEC takes the cake...even a Vandy player got booted and transferred to Arizona! Arizona, a bottom feeder in the pac 10 and certainly not with the same academic requirements as Vandy...now that's funny. It's like a Stanford or Berkeley player getting arrested....oh wait...when was the last time that happened?
Last edited by Lisa H on February 19th at 6:38 PM.
Kev.
It is a sad state of affairs down south with all this going on. I can only speak of Ryan Perrilloux and his recent transgression though. If you want my opinion on that see my latest post. As for you post it's good as usual but this time it's no laughing matter.
Lisa,
Now you know I love you to death so please do not take this wrong when I say you are starting to sound like that #### Alex who always has something negative to say towards the SEC in general. Just as NOS said all schools have their problem children. Just none get a free pass like a certain PAC-10 team we all know of.
NOS,
Honestly, when the idea first came about, I had intentions of doing it for all of College football, and including Scirotto from Penn State as one of the players. Later, I started to realize that a major chunk of the recent players were from the SEC, and that I could get a whole team together from just the SEC conference. Certainly, there are players from all conferences, but SEC seems to be at the top right now my friend... at least, they're the most publicized...
FRANSHEPHONY,
Wow... it really blows me away for what some of these players are getting in trouble for... maybe it happened this much in the past, and today the media just gets a hold of more stories...
HUSKER,
While "Directional U." is quite amusing, it is also very true... not just for the SEC though. Sure, they are guilty of that, but you also see opponents like that in the Big 10's non-conference games, among others...
GAMBIT,
It really is... while I do poke some fun at the whole thing, I also mention it is sad too. As I mentioned to another on here... is it that much worse recently, or is the media just getting a hold of more stories (therefore making it look that way)?? I was blown away at how many I found to be honest...
ksp - saw the report on Perrilloux last night and, sadly, only smiled. Not quite sure why I smiled. Maybe the smile was in frustration at the behaviors of these kids. I like my potato chips but I don't need to fight over them. Especially after midnight. Now, Cheetos...that's a different thing. Thanks for the report. You haven't heard of any players shooting Uzi's off the dorm room balconies in Norman have you? Oh, wait a minute...that was the end of the Switzer era. All good at OU now...knock on wood. Ooops, not necessarily. I haven't heard what happened to DeMarcus Grainger, the defensive lineman who got sent home from Glendale for shoplifting. Every program, unfortunately, has 'em.
GCOACH,
You have to be careful with those Cheetos... you know, because they're incredibly cheesy, and I bet you could easily leave a trail behind in which you would get caught. My fingers are always neon orange after I eat them.
Penn State had a shooting when I was in school as well. Nothing like the tragedies at VT or NIU though... it's getting scary out there for college kids...
Now thats what I call entertainment. However, as an OSU fan, I can never really point the finger at other school's problem childrens. Art Schlister and Clarrett are hard to top.
Nice to see the SEC representing though. The spotlight isn't always a good thing.
I think you should now do a "rest of the nation" team. Kind of like the Texas vs. the Nation game. Then you could do a mock game between the two penal, or is that penile?, teams.
kev,
I'd have done the same thing. What? You don't won't take my stamps? Watch out for the Sun chips.
You should never be able to get arrested anywhere that ducks can eat for free.
PETE,
Thanks... the chip line just came to me. Slogans, you gotta love 'em.
Maurice certainly has some wild stories, and he came to mind... but it was a few years back... plus the SEC kind of took over.
REV,
Possibly... originally (as I mentioned to Nos), I was going to start it up as all of College football. Still, all the stories lately are SEC... and I could fill a whole roster of SEC guys.
DANNY45,
Hmm... it certainly could get interesting to go through and create a list for multiple conferences, and then match them up against each other. Quite intriguing. I may have to do some more research...good call.
EDMONS,
Dude, that's Mitch Hedberg you're quoting right? That guy is hilarious, and a shame that he died at such a young age. Man, I'm craving some Sun Chips now...
This is absolutely hilarious. This does prove that the SEC is absolutely dominant in one thing lol. I'm surprised there aren't more SEC fans on here screaming about how this doesn't mean anything or making up other excuses for their actions, but I'm sure there will be.
But on a more serious note, this is sad. No one who has had the opportunity to play at a D-1 school under scholarship, and therefore a chance to play in the NFL, should do stuff like this. It's just dumb,and even though they are teenagers (some of them), there is still no excuse for breaking the law. Yeah, it's great to have fun in college, but there has to be a line somewhere that you know not to cross, and these guys don't have one. They need to know that you have to grow up sometime, and this is coming from a freshman in college.
And the fact that this problem is spread all through college football really is a sign that something needs to be done. How about enforcing the rules and making these guys realize that there will be consequences for stupid actions?
Buckeye fan,
Glasshouses my friend. Look at Maurice Clarett and the crimes he commited. It happens everywhere. You are talking about 18-22 year olds. I'm sure it's close if not below the average of the demographic not playing sports.
nah dont know me. first post on any of your blogs.
living near Knoxville and being a Penn State fan (07 Outback Bowl) and a Kentucky fan at that, just cracks me up. i knew UT was bad... but not All-Penal bad!
Browns and Buckeyes fans,
No it proves that the SEC is dominate in two areas. The one you are thinking and the fact that the Buckeyes are still winless vs an SEC team in a big bowl game. Put that in your pipe and smoke it!
So, let me get this straight....the vast majority of the list is for alcohol or weed. Wow. Who would of thought college kids would stoop to such low levels??? Get a grip America.
Seeing that you live in Boston, you must be scouting upcoming draft choices for the Pats. You live in such a fine, upstanding city with law abiding teams. Did Belichick coach for an SEC school? I really don't know. Did Randy Moss play for an SEC school? If I recall correctly, he signed originally with Notre Dame...of course with a few hail marys Catholics can dismiss anything. How about Manny Ramirez...what a role model for our youth. Did he go to college? University of Third World Country? Wait, isn't that an ACC school...they will let in any school, e.g. Boston College. Penn State...enough said lately. Big Ten...yup. You lived in Florida? Was it Tallahassee, home of FSU? Yeah, you saw enough of crime related to that fine ACC institution. Or was it Miami? Ditto. In other words, all schools, all of sports has its share of skeletons, living or dead. As has generally dominated college sports in recent memory, fans of other conferences must resort to bashing what their conferences can't defeat in meaningful games. Enjoy your fun, since you can't enjoy your teams. Go Gators!
EDMONS,
"I tried to walk into Target, but I missed."
"Pepperidge Farm bread is fancy, because it's wrapped twice. I don't need one extra step between me and toast."
BROWNSANDBUCKS,
Thanks. It is very sad... not just sad that the SEC can produce a whole squad, but there certainly are a number of other teams and conferences that have a handful of problem players on each of their rosters.
Last edited by ksp113 on February 20th at 11:40 AM.
PSU_NIT,
Ahh, OK... that's cool. I had a post a little while back on Pryor. What do you think of that whole situation? Who is going to get him? If you ever want to talk college sports or PSU, let me know... take care.
GAMBIT,
"Stick that in your pipe and smoke it"?! I haven't heard that line in years... nice work man!
WILDCATS,
Ha ha... oh boy, I don't know how to respond to that one.
COUNTRYJAG,
Yikes. I can't get over the fact that Lou sounds like Daffy Duck. I close my eyes, and feel like I'm watching a cartoon. Poor guy.
VOL_FAN,
Apparently, they need to get better at not getting caught, like the rest of college students. Honestly though, the automatic weapons are on there a few times... and the potato chips one... I still can't get over that.
GOGATORS,
Honestly, nothing drives me more crazy than people who assume things. What a concept that someone can actually be transplanted to another location, yet still like the teams that they grew up with!
I actually like UF to some degree and dislike FSU. I'm in no way a Boston fan... in fact, I really can't stand about every team up here. I write about all teams. One day I'll praise a team, the next day, not so much. What a concept!
Arrests are a major problem in all of college football right now, but lately, it seems like the SEC has been pushed to the forefront.
Hope no Gator steals your potato chips between now and the weekend... take care
Last edited by ksp113 on February 20th at 11:56 AM.
What would be really impressive is if you were to put as much time in researching the role these schools play in the local community where they are located. I guess I'm the only one to notice that schools in larger towns have a proportionally larger number of incidents reported. Having matriculated at schools in both a large city and a small town, I can tell you first hand that the dynamics with the local community and the local police are quite different. Cops in the city just don't care or even seem to go out of their way to nail college athletes. Small town cops seem to realize that the stuff the majority of kids are on this list for is really pretty insignificant in the grand scheme of things.
I can't wait to hear the retorts from the holier-than-thou moral majority on this one......and how many times the word "hypocrite" is used.
This is just further proof that the SEC is the BEST conference bar none. I would put this Penal squad up against any team from any other ####-#### conference and it would be a massacre. After our all powerful SEC Penal squad kicks that #### we'll get drunk, car-jack you and smoke a little refer while we pillage your house, (can you say good-bye to your 50 inch Plasma with ambivision). You don't even deserve that freakin TV anyhow because the only real football played in the world is played in the SEC. I don't know why all you other fools even bother having teams. Y'all just need to bow down and recognize that the SEC rules or we'll send Jermaine Cunningham beat your #### and take your nacho's beyatch.
TNSEVOL10,
Did you study Sociology at any point? Just reading that comment... it just makes me think of concepts of Urban Sociology, which is something I learned about a while back.
EQUATE,
Let me guess, while Cunningham provides the chips, you want to bring one of the other "illegals" with you to help out with getting the munchies too?!
Last edited by ksp113 on February 20th at 12:01 PM.
Geez guys! I said this problem is spread throughout CFB, read the whole post... I'm not that dumb to assert that the SEC is the only conference with idiots in it. Every team has problems like this.
But honestly, when the only thing anyone can throw at Ohio State is Maurice Clarrett, who only played in 2002, I don't think that's too bad for a big D-1 school. 6 years of no major incidents with morons and only a few fairly minor things with a couple of people (Henton trying to pick up a prostitute, and some guy getting caught with weed in 04), it seems to me at least that Tressel learned his lesson and put it into practice. Hell, he even withdrew a scholarship this year from DeVoe Torrence because he is a thug.
equate
LOL! That is some funny stuff. I think the only thing you are missing is the fact that most prisoners carry some sort of weapon on them... wouldn't be too pretty for the SEC guys if they all got shanked on the first play!
Last edited by Browns_and_Buckeyes_fan on February 20th at 12:05 PM.
What about "...we'll get drunk, car-jack you and smoke a little refer while we pillage your house..." didn't you understand? Nacho's is just the tip of the iceburg.
Ksp! Sorry for not reading the whole post or the comments, but I got the idea. Makes me wonder about the future of sports if jocks just being jocks is the answer to everything. You know, the "old" story boys will be boys. Course lying and cheating and getting a needle is ones #### has become a way of life in sports, politics, business, etc.; why should we expect anything else from our athletes? Fuzz
Finally read it/very good. Too funny, shame it is also too true.
Last edited by fuzzboss on February 20th at 1:12 PM.
Cheetos! I was jonesing for Cheetos last night to complement my scotch and water. I pulled em out of the pantry. I never run out of my beloved Cheetos.
For the record, Cheetos don't lead to harder foods, like nachos and ecstasy.
If on a jury, I could never convict someone for needing a Cheetos fix. Never.
The potato chips thing is just half of it!! One of the players started beating the clerk with a sandwich!
Officer!! Officer!! That big brute is beating me with a.. a... SANDWICH!! and, and... CHIPS!!! AAAIIIEEE!!!!
Seriously though, all the Vols on this squad is just disgusting... Fulmer can't be the "warden" because that would imply some sort of control being exercised...
I see where some Florida students have started what they call the Fulmer Cup... Where a running tally of police run-ins are kept up with and scored. The more serious the offense, the higher the score, and the program with the most points at the end of the season is awarded the Fulmer cup...At this rate Phil may win his own award....
Last edited by bluetickhound on February 20th at 1:53 PM.
What about Michael Oher at Ole Miss would injured a 3 year old child and beat to a pulp Antinio Turner who was hidden from the public by the Ole Miss Running BAck Coach; the University Vice Chancellor covered it up; the Ole Miss Police Dept kept it under wraps; the Oxford Police Dept was never told about it; Coach O covered the indcident over; the Jackson, Miss, Memphis and Oxford PRESS never reported the planned beating. All this came out in the book," The Blind Side" by Michael Lewis. Oher went so far in planning the beating that he changed clothes before physically beating and holding up Turner by the neck and injuring a 3 year child of a former Ole Miss player that was taken to the hospital for medical care. It is all in the book. Now that is a MAJOR Criminal action. You left that one out....so the coverup continues. The book says that his guardians paid to have the incident covered up with the help of an attorney who just defended the wife in Jackson,Tenn who murdered her Preacher husband. In the book
