This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew presents to you this week's version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. Served Southern-style, with all the fixin's. Enjoy!

THE GOOD

Tony Stewart: as the winner of this race, he automatically gets first billing. The win broke a 43 race winless streak. This is Smoke's first win at Talladega. Way to go Smoke!

Regan Smith: finished a career-best second place. While he never led a lap, he gave it his best effort to win the race, but came up just short.

DEI: with Smith, Paul Menard, and Aric Almirola, they finished 2-3-4. A HUGE shot in the arm for the organization.

Elliott Sadler: he had a strong car all day and led four laps en route to a fifth-place finish. Excellent effort.

Scott Riggs: he's very rarely been mentioned in any of these categories. He finished tenth and led four laps. A good job by a driver that's looking for a ride next season.

Honorable Mention: David Ragan, Jeff Burton, Clint Bowyer, Bobby Labonte. 

THE BAD

Ryan Newman: as the last place finisher, he gets this dubious spot. He had mechanical issues all day. I wonder if he's counting down the days until he joins Stewart-Haas Racing?

Sterling Marlin: while he did well to qualify, his car also had mechanical issues.

THE UGLY

The Big One: the first one happened on Lap 69 and involved nine cars. It started when Brian Vickers' right front tire exploded and the following drivers were involved: Vickers, Martin Truex, Jr., Almirola, Kasey Kahne, David Gilliland, Terry Labonte, Jamie McMurray, Mike Skinner, and Tony Raines. NASCAR threw a red flag that lasted for 17 minutes.

The Big One, Part 2: this happened on Lap 174, and unlike the first one, this one had HUGE championship implications, as several Chase drivers were involved. A total of 12 drivers were involved: Carl Edwards (who started it), Greg Biffle, Matt Kenseth, Dale Earnhardt, Jr., Kevin Harvick, Kyle Busch, Dave Blaney, Michael Waltrip, Travis Kvapil, Joe Nemechek, Reed Sorenson, and Juan Pablo Montoya. The first six are all Chasers. Another Chaser, Jimmie Johnson, NARROWLY escaped being involved. IMO, this clinched a third straight title for Johnson. Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good, and Johnson was LUCKY. How he escaped, I have no earthly idea. I'll have something for Edwards later on.

Crappafoni Pictures presents to you, in super ultra high definition, this week's version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, served California style, with tri-tip, fresh vegetables, and the best California wine money can buy. Enjoy!

THE GOOD

Jimmie Johnson: as the race winner, he gets automatic first billing. Home cooking was especially good to JJ this week. (He's from El Cajon, CA) He had such a dominant car, it didn't matter what position he was running, he automatically charged to the front. Carl Edwards and Kyle Busch, beware. He's BAAAAAAAACK.

Roush Fenway Racing: once again, this track was kind to them (aside from Jamie McMurray). Greg Biffle finished 2nd, Matt Kenseth finished 5th, Carl Edwards finished 6th, and David Ragan finished 13th. All Biffle has to do is start at Richmond and he's in the Chase.

Denny Hamlin: for the second consecutive week, he finished third. Another strong run for the #11 team. This gives them some breathing room as the circuit goes to Hamlin's home track. He is 93 points ahead of 13th place David Ragan. He should be able to make the Chase.  

Kevin Harvick: the #29 team had yet another strong top 5 finish. He started 33rd and didn't take long to charge to the front. This is easily the best this team has run at Fontana. Another case of home cooking being especially good to him (He's from Bakersfield, CA) This team is peaking at the right time. He WILL get a win at some point this season. At 160 points ahead of 13th, all he has to do is keep his car clean and have a solid finish and he's in the Chase.

David Reutimann: I've gotta give him some props. He had a strong car all weekend, starting 12th and finishing 8th. This was HUGE as his car hovered around 35th in owner points. Now he can breathe easier. He even led some laps in the race and got the five bonus points. Good job David!!

Kasey Kahne: he SORELY needed a good finish to keep his Chase hopes alive. He got it in the form of an eighth-place finish. He's in 14th place, 44 points behind Clint Bowyer for 12th place.

Honorable Mention: Kyle Busch, Clint Bowyer, Brian Vickers, AJ Allmendinger. 

THE BAD

Robby Gordon: he was nothing more than a field filler. About the only time he was mentioned was when he was in an accident or running slow. Zero laps in the top 10. Yeah, he was bad.

Ken Schrader: at this point in his career, another field filler. While I admire him for his desire to race, his days as a competitive driver are LONG GONE.

Kyle Petty: it's getting brutally painful to watch him race. His best bet would be to hire Terry Labonte full time in that car; at least Labonte has put that car in the top 20 this year.

Paul Menard: nary a single mention of him during the telecast. Should be nicknamed "The Phantom" because it's like he's not there, but his car is.

THE UGLY

None: this race was well-run; only two drivers were shown as out of the race: Joe Nemechek and Johnny Sauter.

Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!  

All throughout the world of sports, there are enough idiots, malcontents, and arrogance to so #### you, the Joe Six-Pack Fan, off so badly that you so want to call them out on it. Well, here is your forum to call out an individual, team, league, owner, executive, or fans by throwing them under the Bus. The lovely young lady will take your requests and call out their names. Then they will be thrown under the Bus. I've already given her my requests for the week. Here they are.

MLB

Bud Selig: just because he hasn't been thrown under in awhile doesn't mean I've forgot how clueless he is. He wants to institute instant replay DURING the season and the postseason. While I don't have a problem with replay per se, I have a HUGE problem with the timing of it. Why not wait until the offseason to implement it? Why not work through the logistics of replay BEFORE implementing it? Better yet, why didn't you implement it at the START of the season? This is a total knee-jerk reaction to some lousy calls by the men in blue. For the BAD timing of putting in instant replay, Selig gets thrown under the Bus.

Arizona Diamondbacks: just because I feel like it as a Dodgers fan. They still have to face the St. Louis Cardinals seven times in an 11-game span in mid to late September, including a four game roadie early in the final week of the season. Just because I feel like it, the D-backs go under the Bus.

NASCAR

Jeff Gordon's crew (sans Gordon): the #24 team is in free fall. While I think they'll limp into the Chase, they will be eliminated early. I don't see them being a factor. Gordon is spared while his crew get thrown Under The Bus.

Paul Menard: he is the quintessential field filler. Dave Blaney was passing cars and making a strong push towards the front when Menard clipped Ryan Newman. Newman in turn made contact with Blaney, whose #22 Cat Toyota got the worst of it. My early Christmas wish for Blaney: some good racing luck. In the meantime, Menard the Field Filler gets thrown Under The Bus.

NFL

Carolina Panthers: as much as I hate to do this to my team, I have to. They allowed 24 points in the FOURTH QUARTER in a preseason loss to the Eagles. Even though it's only preseason, this is disturbing. It means the backups aren't ready to play, or aren't good enough to play in the NFL. You can't let up on a team near the finish line; otherwise they will rally and beat you. Credit to the Eagles for not giving in to the temptation to play prevent defense, and for putting the pressure on the Panthers. But I still have to throw the Panthers under the Bus.

OLYMPICS

Spanish National Men's Basketball Team: their racist poses were beyond the pale. (They posed slant-eyed.) If it were Kobe Bryant or LeBron James doing this, it would be an international incident. But because it was the Spanish National Team, the silence is deafening. For their racism, they get thrown Under The Bus.

These are my nominations for the week. Feel free to come in with yours!

This is the time of week that Joe Six-Pack Sports Fan is looking forward to! Time for you, Joe Six-Pack Sports Fan, to call out the object of your ire for their arrogance, idiocy, and plain all-around dumbassery by throwing them under the Bus. The lovely young lady will take your requests. Then they will be called out and thrown under promptly. Here are the requests that I gave her.

NFL

Steve Smith, WR, Carolina Panthers: as a Panthers fan, it pains me to do this, but do this I must. I don't know who started the fight between Smith and CB Ken Lucas, but I know who ended it. Smith earned a two-game suspension by the team for his actions, effective for the first two games of the regular season. He will still be allowed to practice with the team through preseason, then when the regular season starts he won't be allowed to practice with the team. In the meantime, Smith has punched his ducat to be thrown Under The Bus.

NASCAR

Joe Nemechek: I've taken to nicknaming him Field Filler Joe. What the hell was he doing out there? First, he causes a FIRST LAP wreck with Kevin Harvick by making contact with him and sending him spinning. Then he wrecks Paul Menard, knocking both him and Menard out of the race. Field Filler Joe, this isn't Bumper Cars out there. These cars are EXPENSIVE to replace. He won't be driving this Bus anytime soon! But he WILL be thrown UNDER the Bus.

MLB

Kevin Hench: he wrote that the D-backs would beat the Dodgers and win the NL West. He obviously didn't see ManRam destroy his precious D-backs pitching to the tune of 8 for 13 with 2 HRs and 5 RBIs. Manny Ramirez is a mashing savant, pure and simple. He is the best, most clutch hitter of his generation. His presence will be the reason the Dodgers pull away from the D-backs late in the season. Hate to do this to a FoxSports.com columnist, but I must. Oh, and the Dodgers HAMMERED Doug Davis around the yard today to the tune of FIVE earned runs in an inning and two-thirds!!!! ManRam's line: 5 AB, 2 R, 4 H, 3 RBI. (Excuse me while I gloat a bit!)

NCAA FB

Josh Jarboe, WR, Oklahoma Sooners: he was dismissed from the team after an Internet rap video of him surfaced that advocated guns and shooting people. He was already in trouble with the law in Georgia but because he was a first time offender, his offense was reduced to a misdemeanor from a felony. Good for coach Stoops to kick this thug and gang####ing wannabe off his team. Now he can go back home to think about how he pissed away his chance to better himself. But in the meantime, Jarboe gets thrown under the Bus.

GOLF

Michelle Wie: young lady, respect your elders. Especially Annika Sorenstam, the greatest female golfer of all time. To blow off Sorenstam’s criticism by saying, “Whatever” speaks volumes of how much a spoiled little brat you are. Spoiled little brats say “whatever” when they lose the argument or have no argument. You could have said, “She’s entitled to her opinion” or something innocuous like that. But you BLEW HER OFF. That don’t sit well with me. ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU HAVEN’T WON #### ON THE LPGA TOUR. (How many majors has Annika won? More than you’ll ever dream of, Michelle.) I throw Michelle the Diva AND her parents/enablers under the Bus.

Phil Mickelson: he hasn't been the same since pissing away the 2006 U.S. Open. Today he had a chance to redeem himself by winning the WGC Bridgestone Invitational. But he faltered down the stretch, again. I don't think he'll ever be the same golfer he was before the 2006 U.S. Open. You said you played really well? Really? Then why did you #### away another lead in a big tournament? If you had said, "I sucked down the stretch, and Vijay played well", all would be okay. But just for that comment, Lefty gets thrown under the Bus.

TENNIS

Andy Roddick: he withdrew just before his match at the Cincinnati Masters. The timing of the withdrawal stinks to high heaven. If he KNEW he couldn’t have gone, he should have withdrawn BEFORE the tournament started. This would have given his replacement a full day to prepare rather than a few minutes. The replacement, Woong-Sun Jun of South Korea, lost 6-2, 6-2 to Phillipp Kohlschreiber of Germany. I will give Mr. Woong the keys to the Bus that Andy Roddick is to be thrown under. Roddick also gets thrown under again for being overrated and overhyped. 

Whew! Those are my nominees for this week. Feel free to come in with yours!  

Crappafoni Pictures presents in high-definition this week's spaghetti western version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, Philly Cheesesteak Sandwich style.

THE GOOD

Carl Edwards: as the race winner, he automatically gets first billing. Used great pit strategy before the rain delay, and banking on the full race being run. It was, and as a result, Edwards won his fourth race of the year. Good job, Cousin Carl!

Kevin Harvick: overcame a first-lap crash with Field Filler Joe Nemechek (more on him in a later blog) that sent him to 42nd place. Harvick kept battling, and as the race wore on, his car kept getting better and better. May have got a win if not for Field Filler Joe. Also used great pit strategy and a bit of luck at the end (Kyle Busch and Dale Earnhardt, Jr. running out of gas late) to finish fourth.

Tony Stewart: Smoke's car also got better as the race went on. Like Edwards and Harvick, Smoke pitted just before the rain delay. A solid and much needed second place finish.

David Ragan: for awhile it looked like he was going to get his first Cup win. Carl Edwards kept that from happening. A very good finish for the second year Roush Fenway driver.

Clint Bowyer: he also pitted just before the rain delay. Like his teammate Harvick, he got stronger as the race wore on. He started 30th; he finished just out of the top 5, in sixth.

Mark Martin: led the most laps, but was also snakebit by pit strategy. He battled back from having to pit late in the race to finish 8th. More on Martin's pit crew later.

Honorable Mention: Jimmie Johnson, Kasey Kahne, Jamie McMurray, Jeff Gordon.

THE BAD

Michael Waltrip: as the last-place driver, he gets automatic billing. He did lead a lap very early in the race, gaining five bonus points before his engine gave up the ghost.

Mark Martin's pit crew: their issues singlehandedly cost Martin the race. Martin had the car to beat; he led the most laps in the race but on three separate pit stops, the crew had issues. They were definitely off their game.

Joe Nemechek: talk about one guy that was definitely off his game! Field Filler Joe tangled with Harvick on Lap 1, then later on he tangled with Paul Menard in a crash that knocked both drivers out of the race. Yeah, he was that bad. Happy, DON'T qualify next to Field Filler Joe at the next race.

THE UGLY

The rain: fortunately it didn't stay long enough to call the race. But it did make for some pretty interesting strategy.

Joe Nemechek: yes, Field Filler Joe was that bad, and he was that ugly. At least he did take responsibility for both crashes.

Juan Pablo Montoya: blown engine. Enough said. At least he had the smarts to exit along a service road.

Those are my nominees for the week. Feel free to come in with yours!!

This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew goes to the most hallowed ground in motorsports, Indianapolis Motor Speedway, for this week's spaghetti western version (be sure to avoid the debris from used tires!) of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.

THE GOOD

Jimmie Johnson: as the winner of this race, he automatically gets first billing. He had the best car all weekend and showed why he isn't ready to give up his title without a fight.

Carl Edwards: on numerous occasions, he had come up to Johnson's back bumper but couldn't pass him. When Johnson inherited the lead after the final pit stop, Edwards could come no closer than a car length. Still, he had a very stout race car all day.

Denny Hamlin: as much as I've been ragging on him all season, he deserves and has earned his props. Used brilliant pit strategy to finish third. Great finish, and it comes at a much-needed time.

Elliott Sadler: a very solid top 5 finish. He stepped his game up and stayed in the top 10 for 102 of the 160 laps.

A.J. Allmendinger: have to give him props for his first career top 10 finish (he finished 10th), at the Brickyard, no less. Perhaps he can use this to turn his season around.

Roush Fenway Racing: if not for Matt Kenseth's right rear tire exploding on him, they would have had all five drivers in the top 15. More on the tire issues later.

Honorable Mention: Jeff Gordon, Jeff Burton, Kasey Kahne.

THE BAD

Tires: I normally put the 43rd place driver here, but the tires were so bad, NASCAR had to impose competition cautions throughout the race. The tires kept wearing out much faster than usual, leading to both Juan Pablo Montoya and Matt Kenseth bringing out cautions due to the bad tires. It's time for NASCAR to open up the competition for other tire companies to come in, like Hoosier, Firestone, etc. This is what happens when you have a monopoly.

Michael Waltrip: he finished last after getting in a wreck with Paul Menard very early in the race.

THE UGLY

Tires: because of the competition cautions, the race was choppy and had no rhythm to it. Who was good on short runs? Who would have been good on long green flag runs? A sub good to the last few laps' shootout between Jimmie Johnson and Carl Edwards.

Kurt Busch: he got loose and hit the wall, collecting Kevin Harvick in the process. A sub good to Harvick for gaining several positions through attrition.

The race itself: aside from the shootout, it was long and drawn out due to the tires. It wasn't the typical Brickyard 400.

Those are my nominations. Feel free to come in with yours.

This week, Crappafoni Pictures heads clear across the country, to the great northeast, to present to you NASCAR's spaghetti western version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, served with a side of Bahston-style clam chowder. (Perfect for the rain at Loudon) Enjoy!

THE GOOD

Kurt Busch: as the race winner, he gets first billing. Used great pit strategy to inherit the lead right before the rain came; otherwise, he was a sitting duck. Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good.

Casey Mears: had a strong car all day and was poised to steal a win before the rain came. Led more laps in this race than the entire season combined. He'll be a valuable asset to a team like GEM Racing. (Imagine the Casey and Kasey Show!!)

Elliott Sadler: E-Sad's car got stronger as the race went on. Like Kurt Busch, he benefitted from excellent pit strategy. A strong and much-needed top 5 finish.

Martin Truex, Jr.: while he was never really a factor to win, he kept the #1 Chevrolet in the top 10 much of the race.

Tony Stewart: led the most laps, but was snakebit again, this time by the rain. May have had the car to beat if not for the rain.

Denny Hamlin: spent nearly the whole race in the top 10. While he didn't lead a lap, he spent 267 laps in the top 10. Good job.

Honorable Mention: Jimmie Johnson, Kevin Harvick, Jeff Burton, Jeff Gordon.

THE BAD

Patrick Carpentier: a surprising pole winner, Carpentier quickly fell backwards, eventually finishing two laps down. He did lead the first four laps before giving up the lead to Kevin Harvick. On the bright side, he did collect 5 bonus points for leading a lap.

Haas-CNC Racing: both Scott Riggs and Johnny Sauter finished at least three laps down. It won't be that way if Tony Stewart buys the team and puts himself and Ryan Newman in those seats.

Paul Menard: no laps in the top 10, and was getting in everyone's way; he nearly caused an accident that would have collected Kevin Harvick and others. A field filler. When TEI closes its doors, he'll be out of a job.

Terry Labonte: why, oh why, did you come out of retirement? And to an organization that's in disarray? I get that you and your brother want to be teammates again. But PE is not nearly the organization it used to be.

THE UGLY

The Rain: kept the race from reaching its conclusion.

Jamie McMurray: he was involved in the last accident that brought out the caution, right before the rain came. He plowed into Dale Earnhardt, Jr. as Junior was entering the pits. Then he came down into the path of his teammate David Ragan and clipped him, sending Ragan into the wall and ending his day.

Kyle Busch: he and Juan Pablo Montoya had a little tete a tete during the last caution. They decided to play bumper cars. I'm sure had they had a Harvick-style confrontation, Montoya would have snapped the Shrub in half like a twig. Busch's boneheaded move nearly collected a few other cars right behind them.

Michael McDowell: his blown engine capped a crappy day. He did a good job in steering the car to the bottom, below the apron, and exited via a service road.

Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to chime in with yours!