This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew serves up a smoking hot slab of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, BBQ style, complete with corn on the cob, baked beans, and a side of salad. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Jimmie Johnson: as the race winner, he automatically gets first billing, and a healthy cyber helping of ribs, baked beans, salad, and Pepsi to wash it all down. He started from the pole after Juan Pablo Montoya's pole-winning qualifying effort was disallowed (more on JPM in a later blog). He led the most laps in the race. Great job by the #48 and his crew!
Roush Fenway Racing: I'm putting ALL the RFR drivers together in this category. Four of them (Edwards, Kenseth, Biffle, and Ragan) finished in the top 10 and with Jamie McMurray, all of them finished on the lead lap.
Jeff Gordon: not a bad finish for someone battling flu-like symptoms throughout the race. He was edged out at the line by Greg Biffle for third.
Kevin Harvick/Jeff Burton: the RCR teammates both started at the back of the field (Harvick started 36th and Burton started 43rd after a tachometer change as he began to leave pit road). It didn't take them long to charge to the front and stay there. While they didn't have the oomph to contend for the win, they had enough to stay in the top 10. But the way Edwards and Johnson are running, top 10s won't be enough to stay in the Chase for long.
Clint Bowyer: he had an eventful day to start. First he was black-flagged for passing on the start of the race. Then he goes a lap down. He gets a free pass, then he starts working his way towards the front. Unfortunately, he faded to a 12th place finish.
AJ Allmendinger: he finished a career-high 9th place in what may have been his final race for Team Red Bull. Whoever ends up with Allmendinger will be getting a driver starting to find his groove in the second half of the season.
Elliott Sadler: a very good, and much needed, top 10 finish for ESad. Had a strong car throughout the weekend; he started fourth and finished 10th.
Scott Riggs: had mechanical issues throughout the race, including spending time in the garage for an extended period. He finished 42nd.
Kyle Petty: if Petty Enterprises is to become a viable team again, he needs to find a quality replacement for him in the #45 car. It's become very painful to watch him race. A bright future awaits him in the booth, as he is one of the better commentators.
Joe Nemechek: what was this #### doing RACING with the leaders at the very end of the race? Dude, you're a field filler now, let Johnson and Edwards race to the finish and move the *bleep* out of their way.
Robby Gordon: consider his little experiment of owning a one-car team over. He was halfway decent when he was driving for RCR, winning some races and putting together some top tens. He's a field filler now. He's been rumored to go to DEI next season.
THE UGLY
Kyle Busch/Tony Stewart: both JGR teammates had their issues today. Busch had issues early in the race with a sputtering engine. Fortunately for Busch, the issues worked themselves out and he even led a lap. But they didn't work themselves out well enough, as he later fell two laps down. He finished 28th. As for Stewart, he and Brian Vickers were involved in an incident in which Vickers and Stewart made contact, sending Stewart sideways into the infield grass and damaging his front splitter. His car lost downforce as a result and he spent two minutes in his pit stall as his crew repaired the damaged splitter. In the process, he lost six laps.
Martin Truex, Jr.: he had such a strong run in which he was in the top 10 much of the race; in fact, he led some laps and got the five bonus points. Unfortunately, a transmission failure relegated him to a 43rd place finish. That's UGLY.
Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours.
This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew presents to you The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, Philly Cheesesteak-style. Or you can have it with crab cakes, that works, too. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Greg Biffle: as the race winner, he automatically gets first billing. He spent most of the day in the top 10, and had the best car when it mattered.
Roush Fenway Racing: when you have drivers that finish 1-2-3, that will get you in this category every single time. In addition to Biffle, Matt Kenseth finished second and Carl Edwards finished third. David Ragan finished 18th, and Jamie McMurray had a GREAT run ruined by Robby Gordon. Gordon got loose and collected McMurray, who was in the wrong place at the wrong time. McMurray would eventually finish 36th, but he led 35 laps and spent much of the race in the top 10.
Michael Waltrip: in the past, I've criticized him as a field filler, a danger to the other drivers out there, etc. I've even thrown him under the Bus. Not today. Despite starting 40th, he got stronger as the race went on and had by far his best finish of the season, finishing 10th. He was also helped by some good cars retiring early (Kyle Busch), mechanical issues (Denny Hamlin), and crashes. Good job, Michael!
Mark Martin: he started on the outside pole and finished fourth. Although he never led a lap, he spent almost the whole race in the top 10. He served notice that he'll be formidable as he runs full-time in the #5 Chevrolet for Hendrick Motorsports next season.
Jimmie Johnson: he started 20th and looked like he was going to visit Victory Lane, as a very risky gamble paid off. Then late in the race, he faded as the Roush Fenway trio got stronger.
Richard Childress Racing: I have to put all three RCR drivers in here together because all three finished in the top 10. Kevin Harvick, in particular, had an excellent day. He started 24th and finished sixth, and moved up five spots in the Chase standings. He even led a lap during a round of green flag pit stops. Clint Bowyer finished eighth, he led two laps, and spent 302 of the 400 laps in the top 10. Jeff Burton finished ninth, after starting in 21st position.
Jeff Gordon: he started on the pole and led the first 30 laps of the race. He didn't lead after that, but didn't fade too far, either. Spent most of the race in the top 10, finishing seventh.
Honorable Mention: Tony Stewart, Dave Blaney, Ryan Newman, Bobby Labonte.
THE BAD
Kyle Busch: as the last-place finisher, he gets this dubious place. Although he was in the top 10 for much of the first half of the race, his engine gave up the ghost not even halfway into the race. Combine that with his bad finish at Loudon last week, and he's got over an entire race to make up. To make up nearly 300 points with eight races to go, and the way Carl Edwards is running, it's going to be next to impossible.
Robby Gordon: bad Robby--taking out a guy in Jamie McMurray that could have contended for the win. No wonder he was so pissed off at you by parking directly in front of you, then taking off. Good for him!
Sam Hornish, Jr.: he couldn't seem to stay out of the way. He was involved in TWO crashes. At least he didn't take out any of the front runners like Robby Gordon.
Joe Nemechek: another race, another wreck. What else is new?
Denny Hamlin: mechanical issues sidelined him for a number of laps. When he eventually returned to the track, he was multiple laps down, eventually finishing 38th.
THE UGLY
Kyle Busch/Denny Hamlin: engine and mechanical issues put a severe dent in their championship hopes. While Hamlin was able to return, and actually gain a few positions through attrition, Busch finished dead last.
Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: his car was bad from the drop of the green flag. No matter what his crew tried to do to make it better, it got worse. He brought out a caution shortly after he was lapped. What made it worse was that HE brought out the caution and didn't get the free pass.
Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!
This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew serves you up, New England-style, this week's version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, served with a heaping helping of New England Clam Chowder. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Greg Biffle: as the race winner, he automatically gets first billing. It was appropriate that a Roush Fenway driver won this race on the Fenway Group's "home turf."
Jimmie Johnson: although he didn't quite have enough to overtake Biffle, he was still very strong and served notice he's not giving up the championship without a fight.
Carl Edwards: like Johnson, Cousin Carl served notice that he's hungry to win a championship. When does his car NOT run strong?
Jeff Burton: Mr. Consistency showed why he's so consistent. He spent much of the day in the top 10, eventually finishing fourth.
Kurt Busch: he started 20th and finished a strong sixth. His car got better as the race went on. What helped him is the fact that his new lead engineer came over from Helio Castroneves' IRL team and they hit on something.
Martin Truex, Jr.: like Busch, he started close to mid-pack and got stronger as the race went on. He started 18th and finished seventh.
Honorable Mention: Dale Earnhardt, Jr., Tony Stewart, Denny Hamlin, Kevin Harvick.
THE BAD
Ryan Newman: he dropped a cylinder early in the race and had to nurse the car throughout the race. He finished 14 laps down.
Kyle Busch: a sway bar in his car broke early in the race and he had to nurse it until the competition caution came out on Lap 35. His crew spent nearly 30 seconds making repairs, only to see it break again. By the time the crew got it fixed, he was several laps down in 43rd. A sub good to him for finishing 34th through attrition and not giving up on the car and crew.
Michael McDowell: this guy wrecked at least two cars in the race. When will NASCAR pull this guy aside and park him for the remainder of the race? Or better yet, when will someone wreck him and NASCAR look the other way? In my book, he's developing the reputation of being a dirty driver.
THE UGLY
The Little Big One: you knew something was going to happen when cars went five wide coming off Turn 4. Chad McCumbee got loose and collected Chaser Matt Kenseth, starting a multi-car wreck. It looked like something you would see at Talladega. The red flag was thrown to clear the debris and cars from the track, and lasted 10 minutes. The wreck severely damaged Kenseth's chances at winning his second title.
Those are my nominations for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!
Sports fans, it's that time of week again. Time to call out the object of your ire by throwing them under the Bus. Remember, the object of your ire can be a player, coach, fans, league, commissioner, sports executive, columnist, or even your fellow bloggers. You can call out their stupidity and general all-around dumb@$$ery here.
NFL
Ricardo Colclough, DB, Carolina Panthers: he was arrested for DWI on Saturday, hours before the Panthers were to make their final cuts. This doesn’t help. If you want to have a future in the NFL, you better learn to stay down during the season. In the meantime, you earn a tread-tasting trip under the Bus. UPDATE: Colclough has been released by the Panthers a few hours after his arrest. Ya think?
Derrick Martin, CB, Baltimore Ravens: the NFL suspended him for the season opener against the Cincinnati Bengals. He was cited and charged in July for possession of three small bags of the hippie lettuce at the Cleveland airport during a random TSA screening. What the HELL are you doing transporting small bags of the chronic at an airport? Apparently this genius thought he wasn’t going to be searched. Dumb, dumb, dumb. And for that, Martin gets to taste some tread as he gets thrown under the Bus.
Jesse Chatman, RB, New York Jets: he was suspended for four games for violating the NFL’s steroids and substance abuse policy. While he’s been good in the locker room and in practice, rules are rules. He was out of football in 2006, and came back in 2007 with Miami. He’ll have his roster spot when he returns in Week 5. But for now, Chatman gets thrown under the Bus.
Fred Taylor, RB, Jacksonville Jaguars: he was arrested outside a Miami Beach nightclub early Saturday for disorderly conduct. With the season about to begin, what was he doing at a nightclub? Save that for AFTER the season. And remember, nothing good happens after 2 AM, unless you’re getting lucky and doing the Dirty Sanchez with some hottie. What makes it hard is that he’s been a solid character guy, good in the locker room and in the community. But as painful as it is, I have to throw Taylor under the Bus.
Rocky Bernard and Jordan Babineaux, Seattle Seahawks: these two geniuses were suspended for Seattle's Week 1 game at Buffalo. Bernard for violation of the team's personal conduct policy stemming from his allegedly assaulting his ex-girlfriend. Babineaux was suspended for violation of the league's substance abuse policy. In addition to the $35,000 fine, Babineaux is also docked a game check. These two characters get to taste some tread as they get thrown Under The Bus.
MLB
Pittsburgh Pirates: or more specifically, their official scorer. This guy denied the Milwaukee Brewers' CC Sabathia a no-hitter. Sabathia fielded a slow roller by the Pirates' Andy LaRoche and booted it. Sure error, right? NO, it was ruled an INFIELD SINGLE!! If Sabathia fields it cleanly, LaRoche is out from PNC Park to Fox Chapel (a tony Pittsburgh suburb). It wasn't like it was a ban.g-ban.g play. The Pirates' official scorer gets thrown Under The Bus for denying Sabathia a much sought-after no-hitter.
Los Angeles Dodgers: this team went into the tank before rallying against the Diamondbacks' two best pitchers: Dan Haren and Brandon Webb. Getting swept by the Phillies is one thing; getting swept by the weak-#### Washington Nationals will get you thrown under the Bus every single time.
Youth Baseball League of New Haven, CT: this spineless league banned a 9-year-old pitcher named Jericho Scott because he’s too good. He's good, and it irks you to no end because your self-esteem is threatened. This young kid throws 40 MPH, which is roughly equivalent to a high school senior throwing 90-95 MPH with pinpoint control. Whatever happened to celebrating achievement? League and parents, you broke the spirit of a kid. I don’t know how you can sleep at night knowing you broke the spirit of a 9-year-old boy. You have that attitude of being the experts on all things racial. Could it be possible you banned him because of his *race*? (Jericho Scott is African-American) WELL, YOU'RE NOT. I SPIT ON YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE CONTEMPTIBLE. THEN I THROW THE SPINELESS PARENTS AND THE LEAGUE UNDER THE BUS. Parents, I hope you get what’s coming to you. And I hope Jericho Scott overcomes this obstacle to become a Major League pitcher.
NASCAR
NASCAR: for instituting a six-race probation for both Carl Edwards and Kyle Busch for their little dust-up after the Bristol race. NASCAR is forever stressing they want to return to its roots. Putting Edwards and Busch on probation is just stupid. Are they trying to neuter its drivers? I think so. NASCAR itself gets thrown under the Bus.
Those are my nominees for the week. Feel free to come in with yours!
P.S. The young lady wasn't available this week; perhaps next week.
Crappafoni Pictures presents to you, in super ultra high definition, this week's version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, served California style, with tri-tip, fresh vegetables, and the best California wine money can buy. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Jimmie Johnson: as the race winner, he gets automatic first billing. Home cooking was especially good to JJ this week. (He's from El Cajon, CA) He had such a dominant car, it didn't matter what position he was running, he automatically charged to the front. Carl Edwards and Kyle Busch, beware. He's BAAAAAAAACK.
Roush Fenway Racing: once again, this track was kind to them (aside from Jamie McMurray). Greg Biffle finished 2nd, Matt Kenseth finished 5th, Carl Edwards finished 6th, and David Ragan finished 13th. All Biffle has to do is start at Richmond and he's in the Chase.
Denny Hamlin: for the second consecutive week, he finished third. Another strong run for the #11 team. This gives them some breathing room as the circuit goes to Hamlin's home track. He is 93 points ahead of 13th place David Ragan. He should be able to make the Chase.
Kevin Harvick: the #29 team had yet another strong top 5 finish. He started 33rd and didn't take long to charge to the front. This is easily the best this team has run at Fontana. Another case of home cooking being especially good to him (He's from Bakersfield, CA) This team is peaking at the right time. He WILL get a win at some point this season. At 160 points ahead of 13th, all he has to do is keep his car clean and have a solid finish and he's in the Chase.
David Reutimann: I've gotta give him some props. He had a strong car all weekend, starting 12th and finishing 8th. This was HUGE as his car hovered around 35th in owner points. Now he can breathe easier. He even led some laps in the race and got the five bonus points. Good job David!!
Kasey Kahne: he SORELY needed a good finish to keep his Chase hopes alive. He got it in the form of an eighth-place finish. He's in 14th place, 44 points behind Clint Bowyer for 12th place.
Honorable Mention: Kyle Busch, Clint Bowyer, Brian Vickers, AJ Allmendinger.
THE BAD
Robby Gordon: he was nothing more than a field filler. About the only time he was mentioned was when he was in an accident or running slow. Zero laps in the top 10. Yeah, he was bad.
Ken Schrader: at this point in his career, another field filler. While I admire him for his desire to race, his days as a competitive driver are LONG GONE.
Kyle Petty: it's getting brutally painful to watch him race. His best bet would be to hire Terry Labonte full time in that car; at least Labonte has put that car in the top 20 this year.
Paul Menard: nary a single mention of him during the telecast. Should be nicknamed "The Phantom" because it's like he's not there, but his car is.
THE UGLY
None: this race was well-run; only two drivers were shown as out of the race: Joe Nemechek and Johnny Sauter.
Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!
Sports fans, is there someone or something in the world of sports that has gotten you so angry you want to get it off your chest? You know you want to call ________ out on their arrogance, idiocy, or general all-around dumbA$$ery. Here is the forum to do so. I know I have a few of my own that I have given to the lovely young lady, she will call them out, and they will be thrown Under The Bus.
NFL
Cincinnati Bengals: WHY did you bring Chris Henry back when you renounced all ties with him earlier in the year? You as a franchise have lost ALL credibility. Marvin Lewis has dug his own grave, so to speak. Paul Brown must be turning over in his grave. How did you, the franchise of Ken Anderson, Ken Riley, Anthony Munoz, and Boomer Esiason, have fallen so far so quickly? For bringing back a malcontent and bad seed (and drafting bad seeds Pat Sims and Jason Shirley), the Bengals get thrown under the Bus.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers fans: or more specifically, those that think a preseason record is an indication of how their team will do this season, aka a myopic. Yes, your team won the Super Bowl, but that was half a decade ago! Yes, your team has a good preseason record this year. No, your team will not be among the elite, as you think. So stop being myopic and get real. Your team is an average team at best. Your offense doesn’t strike fear into the hearts of opposing defenses. Your defense, while still good, isn’t what it once was. In the meantime, the myopic Bucs’ fans get thrown under the Bus.
NASCAR
Michael Waltrip: he started the Big One when he made contact with Casey Mears. Mears then made contact with future teammate Clint Bowyer, and all hell broke loose after that. While Mears admitted he caused it, that wasn’t true. Mears was trying to take the high road but didn’t need to. Waltrip should assume full responsibility but won’t. He should retire but won’t. Bowyer was right when he wondered why NAPA signed back up with Waltrip. In the meantime, Waltrip gets thrown under the Bus by Mears and Company. Kasey Kahne and the Kahne Brigade get to throw Waltrip under the Bus a second time for ruining his Chase chances.
Kyle Busch: he made the Bus(c)h League Move of the Year when he bumped race winner Carl Edwards after the checkered flag flew. Edwards, as expected, retaliated by spinning Busch out. Good for him. Busch should be fortunate Edwards didn't put him in the wall. For that bonehead move, Kyle Busch gets thrown Under The Bus.
NCAA FB
University of New Mexico: they were put on probation for academic fraud involving some former assistant coaches and recruits for obtaining fraudulent credits through correspondence classes at Fresno Pacific University in Fresno, California. The players never completed the courses. To say it’s embarrassing for UNM is an understatement. Just when the Lobos were starting to make progress toward being one of the better teams in the Mountain West Conference, this happens. For committing academic fraud and setting the program back, the Lobos’ former assistant coaches and recruits get thrown Under The Bus.
Ben Mauk, QB, Cincinnati: the now-former Bearcats' signal caller is appealing to the NCAA for a FOURTH time regarding a foot injury he suffered as a freshman at Wake Forest. He alleges the foot injury prevented him from playing. He better have convincing evidence for his reenstatement. While Mauk had a superb season last season, the fact remains his college career is over, pending this latest appeal. While I won't throw him under the Bus if this were his first or second appeal, I will throw him under the Bus because he's exhausted all appeals and now it appears he's crying sour grapes.
Those are my nominees for the week. Feel free to come in with yours!
This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew is at one of its very favorite tracks, Bristol at night. The crew gorged on lots of bumping and ####ing, along with a healthy helping of steaks marinated in Jack Daniel's. This race is one of the great spectacles in all of sports. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Carl Edwards: as the race winner, he automatically gets first billing. He definitely had something for Kyle Busch, who led the most laps but finished second. Kudos to Edwards for spinning out Busch after the checkered flag flew in retaliation of Busch bumping him. Congratulations, Concrete Carl!
Kyle Busch: as stated above, he led the most laps but didn't get it done.
Kevin Harvick/Clint Bowyer: the RCR teammates had huge point races when they needed it the most. Harvick finished fourth and Bowyer finished seventh. Bowyer's finish was particuarly impressive after getting involved in The Big One on Lap 215 and suffering damage to his right front axle, getting toed out. Bowyer had to run with it from that point on. A very impressive finish by Bowyer. Kudos to Bowyer for stating that Michael Waltrip was the worst driver in NASCAR. Harvick was one of three drivers (Edwards and Jeff Gordon being the others) to spend the entire race in the Top 10. (He started sixth)
Jeff Gordon: led one lap very early and got the five bonus points he sorely needed. Spent the entire race within the top 10. Kept his car out of trouble the entire race and was rewarded. Finally he's out of the Bad and Ugly categories!!
Denny Hamlin: another driver that needed a very high finish. He got it with a strong third place showing. He came in with a questionable attitude about making the Chase. This finish was the tonic Hamlin and his team needed. With the final two races on tracks that Hamlin runs well at, he should be able to make the Chase.
THE BAD
David Reutimann: while I normally would put the last-place driver here, the driver finished there due to an accident. Reutimann is here because he started second and finished 25th, two laps down. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and conclude he doesn't have the experience of running up front.
Jimmie Johnson: he was never a factor after making contact with another driver early in the race. He finished an uncharacteristic 33rd, 15 laps down.
Field Fillers: you people know who you are. You're the guys racing the leaders when you're laps down.
Michael Waltrip: I'm saving my wrath for last. He was the cause of The Big One, when he made contact with Casey Mears. Time for Mikey to hang up his helmet and move to the booth as an analyst. Everytime he's anywhere near the leaders (usually several laps down), I cringe because he races with them.
THE UGLY
The Big One: the Talladegaesque wreck started when Waltrip made contact with Mears. Mears then made contact with Bowyer, and all hell broke loose. Bowyer and Kasey Kahne were the two Chasers that got caught in the wreck. Kahne was the worst loser, dropping to 14th in the point standings.
Kyle Busch: yes, he was frustrated at not winning after leading over 400 laps. He executed the Bus(c)h League move of the year when he tapped Edwards after the checkered flag flew. When you pull a bonehead move like that, expect retaliation. I'll have something for him tomorrow.
Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!
The Crappafoni Pictures crew is at the nation's auto capital, Michigan, for a second helping of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, northern BBQ style. Enjoy your postrace meal!
THE GOOD
Carl Edwards: as the race winner, he gets first billing. He had the best car, and his pit crew gave him consistently quick pit stops. A special shout out goes to his Roush Fenway Racing teammates: David Ragan, Greg Biffle, Matt Kenseth, and Jamie McMurray. All five Roush Fenway drivers finished in the top 10. Good job, Cousin Carl and Roush Fenway!
Kyle Busch: for once (it only seems that way) he's not in the top spot. He did have a strong car and led 34 laps. But he didn't have quite enough for Edwards at the end; he thought he had "bad" tires.
Brian Vickers: early on, he looked like he was going to get Toyota's first win at Michigan. He started from the pole and led 21 laps. He spent all but ONE lap in the top 10, when he fell out during a round of green-flag pit stops.
Kevin Harvick: he started somewhere near downtown Detroit (Not really, but it seemed that way. He started 38th.) and worked his way up to an eighth place finish. He was easily the mover of the race, moving up 30 spots. He also gained three positions in the Chase. All in all, a very good points day for Happy and the #29 crew.
Elliott Sadler: he started third, and had a strong car much of the day. He was in the top 10 for 177 of the 200 laps. A very good run for E-Sad. Good job.
THE BAD
Marcos Ambrose: he blew an engine very early in the race and his day ended almost before it began. As the last place finisher, he gets this dubious slot.
Jeff Gordon: the #24 team is in freefall. A 42nd place finish leaves him in ninth place in the points standings, dropping three spots and his bubble is growing larger and larger.
Denny Hamlin: what looked to be a good points day went the other way when his engine blew with five laps to go. He now sits in the hot seat of 12th place in the Chase standings. Nice job of throwing your pit crew under the bus there, pal. I know you're frustrated and that you want to make the Chase oh so bad. The bright spot is that two of the last three tracks are at tracks where he runs well.
Kasey Kahne: he needed a strong finish to solidify his Chase chances. He didn't get it. His car was uncharacteristically bad. In fact, he was off the track for a period of time. When he returned, he was nearly 40 laps down. A 40th place finish just made his bubble a little larger.
THE UGLY
Marcos Ambrose: hate to put him in this category, but I must. We hardly knew ye. He was done so early, he could have been called The Phantom Race Car Driver. All part of the pitfalls of a Cup rookie--he runs very well one week and very bad the next.
Jeff Gordon: unless the #24 team can get out of the death spiral they're in now, they'll be on the outside looking in. While I think they will, they're no lock to be in the Chase.
Those are my nominees for the race. Feel free to come in with yours!
This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew is on the road to serve you, New York-style, this week's version of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. Served piping hot with a bottle of New York's finest wine. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Kyle Busch: as the race winner, he automatically gets first billing. Also led the most laps in the race. He's not only swept both Sprint Cup road course races, but with the win in Mexico City, he set the single-season record for most road course wins with three.
Marcos Ambrose: started at the rear of the field. To go from 43rd to third was nothing short of outstanding. If given the right opportunity with the right team, he can and will win Cup races. Additional kudos for racing Tony Stewart cleanly.
Tony Stewart: Smoke led one lap, thanks to Kyle Busch. While he didn't have the car to beat, he had a very strong car. Improved his Chase chances.
Juan Pablo Montoya: he started 25th and finished fourth, leading two laps during green flag pit stops. Had a strong car throughout the race, plus benefitted from having consistently quick pit stops. A shout out goes to his pit crew, led by crew chief Brian Pattie.
Martin Truex, Jr.: perhaps signing a one-year extension with DEI earlier in the week, plus being fairly close to home was the tonic that the #1 team needed. A fifth place finish also helps. While he's not mathematically eliminated from the Chase, he has an uphill battle. He needs Top 5's between now and the Chase, plus a couple of bad finishes by the other Chase contenders he's chasing.
Honorable Mention: Kevin Harvick, Jimmie Johnson, Denny Hamlin, Carl Edwards, Kurt Busch.
THE BAD
Tony Eury, Jr.: while I normally have this spot for the last place driver, the last place driver finished there due to an accident, so I won't list him there. The #88 team crew chief hung Dale Jr. out to dry with puzzling pit strategy. Instead of contending for his first road course win, Dale Jr. finished 22nd. All because of bad pit strategy. While Dale Jr. was on his game, Tony Jr. wasn't.
Michael McDowell: he and David Gilliland tangled with eight laps to go and started a Talladega-like wreck. Several cars were involved, and Gilliland got the worst of it. I suspect NASCAR will have a little chat with him.
Jeff Gordon: he had a surprisingly bad car and it got worse as the race went on. Most of his time in the top 10 was in the early part of the race. Even more surprising, he's in this category.
THE UGLY
The Crash: it happened with eight laps to go in the race in front of the pit road entrance. Michael McDowell and David Gilliland had been racing rough and tumble when they collided in Turn 11. The wreck collected nine drivers total and caused a carnage of wrecked cars, twisted metal, and sand from the barrels that protect the drivers from the pit wall.
Those are my nominees. Feel free to come in with yours.
This week, the Crappafoni Pictures crew traveled to Chicagoland. Now that the race is over and the film has been edited, we present to you, deep dish pizza style, this week's The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.
THE GOOD
Kyle Busch: as this week's winner, he automatically gets first billing. He led 165 of the 267 laps, but had to overcome Jimmie Johnson in a two-lap shootout at the end to win his seventh Cup race of the season. At the rate this season's going, he may be at this spot the rest of the season.
Jimmie Johnson: his car got stronger as the race went on. Led 15 laps and may have won if not for the last caution (David Gilliland blowing an engine).
Kevin Harvick: night time was the right time for Happy. He started 13th and quickly worked his way up through the field; at one point he was in second place. He finished third, right on Johnson's back bumper. This was a MUCH needed result for Happy; he is currently in ninth place in the points.
Greg Biffle: led 43 laps in this race. At one point he was a lap down but got a much-needed long green flag run to get back into the top 10. Gambled on pit strategy to get track position and a caution shortly thereafter helped lock him in. Finished a strong fourth.
Tony Stewart: the announcement of his future seemed to relax him. He drove like the Smoke of old. Had a great car on short runs but faded on long runs. Spent all but three laps inside the top 10. He'll find Victory Lane soon.
Honorable Mention: Red Bull Racing, Ryan Newman, Roush Fenway Racing, Martin Truex, Jr., Jeff Gordon.
THE BAD
Michael McDowell: as the last place finisher, he gets this dubious distinction. He's a field filler.
Travis Kvapil: just when I was about to be sold on him, he comes up with this turkey of a race. Especially when he's so close to his native Wisconsin.
Sam Hornish, Jr.: he seemed to be out there admiring the track and its scenery a little longer than the other drivers out there. TRANSLATION: he was SLOW.
Terry Labonte: I know he's doing the best he can with crappy equipment. Let's face facts, PE has crappy equipment. He's probably thinking, I came out of retirement for THIS? The only positive is that he has younger brother Bobby for a teammate. Hell, I even put him in the Good category of an earlier GB&U.
THE UGLY
David Gilliland: blew an engine with 8 laps to go to bring out the final caution of the race. He blew it in the worst possible place: right after he passed the entrance to pit road.
Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: started second and went steadily backwards as the race went on. Although he finished on the lead lap, he was never a factor. His crew totally missed on the setup and when that happens, it's going to be a LONG evening. His car was tight and no matter how much they did to loosen it up, it stayed tight pretty much the whole race.
Denny Hamlin: his car lost power early in the race due to ignition issues. His crew changed the entire ignition system in the #11 FedEx Toyota. When he returned to the race, he was threatening to be the first driver in the Bad category. Through attrition, he gained a few spots, finishing 40th. Took a serious hit in the points due to Harvick, Kenseth, Biffle, and Stewart finishing in the top 10.
Clint Bowyer: he's going in the wrong direction in the points. A few weeks ago, he seemed to be a lock to be in the Chase. Now he's 13th in the standings after a 22nd place finish. Spent only two laps in the top 10.
Jeff Burton: started third and quickly went backwards. At one point in the race, he was 37th. It took a free pass for Burton to get back on the lead lap. Did manage to finish 19th, but it could have been much worse.
Carl Edwards: was in contention for the win until his splitter broke. He lost a lap under green when he went to the pits to repair the splitter. He lost another lap due to the tremendous aerodynamic disadvantage this gave him.
Those are my nominees for the race! Feel free to come in with yours!
Scanning the world of sports, you can find plenty of sports individuals and teams that so tick you off you want to call them out. Or throw them under the Bus. This is your forum to do that! I have a few that I'd like to throw Under The Bus.
NFL
Willie Andrews, CB, New England Patriots: this coward allegedly pointed a gun at his girlfriend during a domestic dispute early last Monday. At the time, the Patriots said they were aware of the report, but had "no comment." UPDATE: the Patriots released Andrews the next day. This thug does not belong on ANY NFL roster because he's a lawbreaker. If it is proven he did this, he should NOT be a free man for a VERY LONG TIME. Andrews gets thrown Under The Bus for being a thug and a dumb####.
Brett Favre: there's that rumor floating around that he may be unretiring. The Packers have moved on without him. Sounds like Aaron Rodgers is having his feet cut out from under him. Brett, you're one of the all-time greats, but enough already! For "tantalizing" us with the unretirement rumors, you get thrown Under The Bus (Cook).
NASCAR
"Fans" that threw debris on the track at Daytona: this is to you "fans" that threw debris on the track after Kyle Busch won. That was garbage. You are NOT true NASCAR fans. You are pathetic, miserable LOSERS. You can boo Kyle all you want and that's fine. But to throw debris at him after he wins a race? That's beyond the pale. Congratulations to Kyle Busch on his win at Daytona. And to you "fans" that threw debris on the track, you get thrown under the Bus, one "fan" at a time.
MLB
Milwaukee Brewers: they blew a five-run lead on Thursday. In the ninth inning. As a Dodgers fan, it #### ME OFF. You suck, Milwaukee. Your bullpen sucks. When you're up 5-0, three outs away from winning, and you give up the game, THAT blows. All they needed was THREE OUTS!! Yet their merry band of arsonists called the bullpen imploded. They proceeded to drag their gas cans out of the pen, soaked up that stadium with gasoline, then flicked their blue tips and burned down Chase Field. The Phoenix Fire Department was pretty busy that day. For that colossal gag job, the Brewers get thrown Under The Bus.
That's all I have for the week. What say you? Come on in with your nominees!
This week, Crappafoni Pictures brings you an Independence Day celebration of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, grilled BBQ style and served with all the fixin's and the beverage of your choice. Enjoy!
THE GOOD
Kyle Busch: as the race winner, he gets first billing. An extra good for him for coming back from 37th to win. While he had a strong car all race, his car was the best at the end.
Carl Edwards: almost became first billing in this blog. Narrowly lost a drag race with Kyle Busch on the final lap.
Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: had a very strong car throughout the race, and between he and teammate Jeff Gordon, led 96 of the 162 laps in the race.
Mark Martin: his signing with Hendrick Motorsports must have buoyed his confidence, as he finished solidly in the top 5.
Patrick Carpentier: came out of nowhere to finish in the top 10, his first career top 10 on a superspeedway. Of the open wheelers, he seems to be adapting to NASCAR the best.
Joe Nemechek: Front Row Joe scored a HUGE top 5 finish, finishing fifth. It was huge not only for himself, but his team, as they were outside the top 35 in points and had to race their way in.
Honorable Mention: Johnny Sauter, David Ragan, Regan Smith.
THE BAD
Greg Biffle: as the 43rd place finisher, he gets the dubious first billing.
Jon Wood: had to race his way in and very early took his #21 Ford to the garage for major repairs. He returned to finish 7 laps down. He was actually running with the main pack after the major repairs and setup. Could the Wood Brothers go under in NASCAR's ever changing economic landscape?
THE UGLY
The Big One: this happened when Jimmie Johnson spun on the backstretch and collected several cars, among them David Reutimann, who tied a NASCAR record with FIVE free passes, eventually getting back on the lead lap. The cruel irony: Reutimann was back on the lead lap at the time of the accident.
The Big One, Part II: THIS one happened on Lap 162 and it involved Michael Waltrip, Travis Kvapil, Sam Hornish Jr., and Dave Blaney. TBO, Part II ended the race with Kyle Busch being declared the winner.
TNT's "coverage": while I liked the split screen, there were several instances that they could have cut away from the commercials to report events on the track. One such instance involved Kyle Busch dropping off the pace to 37th at one point.
It is that time of the week where you, Joe Six-Pack Fan, can call out those idiots, malcontents, ingrates, and general all around bad guys for their behavior that so #### you off. Looking around the world of sports, there are PLENTY of sports figures that have earned the dubious distinction of being thrown Under The Bus this week. I have some sports personalities.
NASCAR
Juan Pablo Montoya: his tete-a-tete with Kyle Busch earned him a trip to NASCAR's equivalent of the principal's office, aka The Big Red Hauler. (Not to be confused with Big Red, one of JPM's sponsors) I will come correct on putting Kyle Busch in the Ugly category of an earlier blog, The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. I will make up for it by throwing JPM Under The Bus.
Tony Stewart's Pit Crew: why on earth did they change two tires when they knew that rain was coming on the horizon? Especially when gas only was working. The crew cost Smoke a possible win. And as a result, Zippy and Company get thrown Under The Bus.
Jamie McMurray: I hate to do this to such a good guy, but I must. It appeared he had plenty of room to go around Dale Earnhardt, Jr. as Junior was entering the pits for his final pit stop. J-Mac plowed into him, tearing up his own vehicle and as he slid to the bottom of the track, he clipped his teammate David Ragan. Ragan lost control and hit the wall, ending HIS day. For being inattentive at an inopportune time, J-Mac goes Under The Bus.
NBA
Shaq: he dissed Kobe Bryant in a freestyle rap at a recent outing at a nightclub in New York City. The Big Chicken#### did this after last week's Who Would You Throw Under The Bus? was posted. Shaq's not escaping. Shaq, where were you when the Finals were being played? WATCHING IT ON TV, like millions of other Americans. Where was Kobe? PLAYING in the Finals. Shaq, grow the hell up. You won a ring without Kobe; give it a rest already. As if Kobe doesn't need any more motivation, this will fuel his fire even more to win a title without you. Shaq, and in the meantime, you get thrown Under The Bus.
Memphis Grizzlies: yes, you got O.J. Mayo. But you paid a pretty steep price to get him. You gave up Kevin Love, Mike Miller, Brian Cardinal, and another player. Meanwhile, the Minnesota Timberwolves improved themselves by getting a fundamentally sound player in Love, a sharpshooter in Miller, and a couple of other serviceable bigs that will add depth to the Wolves' bench. When you allow Kevin McHale to fleece you, it will get you thrown Under The Bus every single time.
NFL
New York Giants: they got rid of the Hefty Lefty, Jared Lorenzen. They got rid of the WRONG QB. They should have got rid of Anthony Wright. For getting rid of the wrong QB, the G-men get thrown Under The Bus.
Houston Texans: it's going to take me a VERY long time to be able to root for this team again. They so screwed up David Carr while he was there he's shot mentally. They NEVER gave him a decent running game and a decent O-line while he was there. They allowed him to be a human pinata. Then AFTER they unceremoniously dump him in favor of Matt Schaub, they FINALLY work on building up a running game and an O-line. If the football gods are listening, the Texans won't win a Super Bowl while Robert McNair owns the team. In the meantime, the Texans get thrown Under The Bus.
MLB
Houston Astros: for allowing the Shawn Chacon/Ed Wade drama to reach new heights. This is one of the most dysfunctional teams in MLB. Drayton McLane needs to sell this team to a local group that WANTS to win. Chacon gets thrown Under The Bus for attacking Wade physically for refusing his orders/requests. Wade gets thrown Under The Bus for escalating the incident. Who's next?
TENNIS
Justin Gimelstob: he called Anna Kournikova a b***h and a #### and said some sexually charged remarks towards her involving his brother. Kournikova, to her credit, is taking the high road. Gimelstob, to his credit, took full responsibility for his remarks and apologized. However, you can't unring that bell. For his egregious lapse in judgment and for putting both feet in his mouth, Gimelstob gets thrown Under The Bus.
Ana Ivanovic: she lost early at Wimbledon. There goes LOTS of guys' reasons to watch Wimbledon in the first place. She's HOT. It wouldn't be so bad if she weren't the #1 seed. But she's the top seed and to lose in the second round IS reason to be thrown Under The Bus.
Those are my nominees for this week. Feel free to come on in with yours!
.JPG)
