Welcome one and all back to the the weekly hump day special, and our endless pursuit of fair and balanced reporting through the pursuit of the stupid, immature and sophomoric.  So with our mission statement out of the way, let’s head into today’s topics…

By now, I imagine most of you have either seen the video or heard the audio of St. Louis Cardinal manager Tony Larussa’s DUI arrest.  This in itself is humorous enough, particularly the (somewhat) seamless transition from from M to N to I to Z, then back to M, and N.  But this piece of footage brings up the long feared fact that the US is indeed falling behind other countries in basic educational skills. I mean… M, N, I, Z?  Even with a few drinks in you, that should be a gimme.  So in the spirit of education, we bring you a series of alphabet cliff notes G-t-W style to help you remember the basics. And in defiance of the law, we will recite in song… So with that, we’ll start the classic children’s rhyme with the first verse… A, B, C, D, E, F, G….

A for Anderson, Pamela

B for Bellucci, Monica

C for Cuccinotta, Maria Grazia

D for Dawson, Rosario

E for Electra, Carmen

F for Fox, Megan

G for Garner, Jennifer

Tune in next week for the next verse... Leaving such an important issue unfinished is not an option.