Last night's Rivalry Week contest between Georgetown and Villanova was the ugliest college basketball game of the year. This baby had it all: terrible shooting, terrible playcalling, illiterate fans, a dearth of exciting plays, and, to cap it off, a questionable call by a referee to end the game. How bad was this 55-53 saga? Well, I turned away with 12 minutes left in the first half, watched a TiVoed episode of "Rock of Love II," then returned to the game for the second half. And what did I miss? Not much. While Bret Michaels was scoring with every chick on his show, Villanova was scoring like a band geek with cold sores.

Here, in short, were the "highlights":
 * Villanova shot 13 percent from the field in the second half and 24.6 percent for the game. In 69 combined minutes, Casiem Drummond, Antonio Pena, Reggie Redding and Shane Clark were 0-10 from the field. To Drummond's credit, however, he did put together five personal fouls.

* If you subtract Scottie Reynolds's 6-13 shooting, the Wildcats were 8-44 from the field, or 18 percent. 

 * Nova was also 0-13 from 3-point range, or 0 percent.

 * In the first 12 minutes of the second half, Villanova was 1-21 from the field. 

 * Despite the inability of their opponents to pee while standing up, Georgetown couldn't put them away, mainly because they decided that turning the ball over and not shooting was their best strategy. At one point, Villanova had attempted 31 second-half shots (and made just 4) while Georgetown had only attempted 14 second-half shots.

* In the first half, it looked like a brawl was inevitable. As any fan of the early 90s Knicks will tell you, that's what happens when you can't shoot straight and you know it: You want to kill people.

* At one point Bill Raftery likened a move by Scottie Reynolds, who head-faked Jonathan Wallace into the air and then leaned in to draw the foul, to something Walt Frazier would do. Thankfully, Jay Bilas and Sean McDonough called out Raftery for referencing a guy whom no one under 50 remembers seeing play. 

 * If anyone dunked in this game, I missed it. I didn't, however, miss the riveting discussion among the three commentators as they explained the difference between 1) purposely kicking the ball on defense and 2) having it inadvertently thrown into your leg by an offensive player. Brought to you by "The Apostles of the Obvious," now playing in select theaters.

* One of the students in the Georgetown section flashed a sign that read, "Bilas and Rafferty 2008." As far as I know, singer Gerry Rafferty of "Baker Street" fame is not running for president this year. That student, however, will probably be a candidate in 2024.

 * Roy Hibbert only shot the ball 6 times, even though Nova had no one who could stop him. Bilas, who's a great commentator and analyst, couldn't believe Georgetown didn't keep feeding him the ball, since he's adept at passing out of the post, which gives teammates great shot opportunities along the perimeter. Bilas said covering Hibbert is like covering your dad in the driveway when you're 8 years old. Naturally, Sean McDonough and Gerry Rafferty had no idea what he was trying to say, with McDonough pointing out that his father, the late great sportswriter Will McDonough, was not 7-3.

* The game-ended (mercifully) when a referee called Nova's Corey Stokes for fouling Gtown's Jonathan Wallace, a tic-tac call that allowed Wallace to go to the line with 0.1 seconds left and the game tied. In truth, Villanova deserved that kind of ending. They had the ball with 30 seconds remaining, in a tie game on the road, and their best player (Scottie Reynolds) had the ball on the baseline, but instead of shooting he attempted to pass out of a double team and the ball was intercepted. Scottie, baby, your teammates shoot field goals like Joey Dorsey shoots free throws. You don't try to pass in that situation, you jack it up and take your chances. The ref obviously agreed. His call on Stokes (and Wallace's ability to make free throws) saved us all from the horror of overtime in the ugliest college basketball game of the year.