Since his first Cup race at Homestead last year, I've come down as hard on Juan Pablo Montoya as anyone.

The nickname "Crash" is one I've hung on him and the record is pretty clear that it fits.

At this point in his NASCAR career, he is over-rated, out-of-control on the track and has a bad attitude.

His ability to make stupid comments and weak excuses for his mistakes puts him in the elite company of Tony Stewart and the Busch Brothers in his rookie season.

If there is another driver in the top 35 he has managed to not wreck this season, I can't think of who it is.

I don't think he's made contact with any of the safety vehicles or pace car, but it's only a matter of time. He's certainly had contact with every single driver in the top 15.

In his confrontation at Watkins Glen with Kevin Harvick, Montoya crossed a line that would have gotten him suspended in any other sports league -- he struck an official.

It's an aspect that NASCAR is sweeping under the rug and everyone is afraid to deal with.

Letting it slide sets a terrible precedent.

Letting it slide even goes back on previous precedents.

It's the same principal that was upheld in parking and fining of Robby Gordon for disregarding black flags and radio commands from officials in Montreal.

The sport doesn't matter. The player (or driver) has to respect the officials.

It isn't a gray area. It doesn't matter if the official is right or not. It's a black and white line that simply can't be ignored.

Especially when your game involves 3,500 pound race cars.

My criticism of Montoya has been of him as a driver and a role model.

His race, his national origin, his language and his accent simply don't enter into it. They don't matter.

You'll note I lumped Montoya in with three of the most tragically white Caucasians to ever walk the planet -- Stewart and the Brothers Busch.

Those who feel the need to publicly call Montoya "####", "Chaco Taco", "Speedy Gonzales" or worse make a spectacle of their own stupidity, ignorance and hate.

What's worse, these few ignorant yahoos, like Mudminnows and Brickhouse, unfairly embarrass and discredit the greatest and best behaved fans in the world.

Anytime you get more than 100,000 people together over 30 times a year (and another 60,000 plus another half dozen times), you are going to find some great examples of people whose parents should have made better choices in their birth control.

Sure, there are notable exceptions (a drunken fan stealing the pace car prior to the 1986 Winston 500 is my personal favorite), but when it's all said and done, there isn't another sport that can match the quality of behavior from fans that is part of what NASCAR is all about.

So that's why I'm down with the late, great, John Belushi in saying, "I hate Illinois ####s".

Seven years ago, before I married the hottest member of NASCAR MILF Nation, we verbally entered into a pre-nuptial agreement.

It addressed one single, but very important issue in having a happy marriage. It is an issue that is a source of conflict between tens of millions of couples: sports.

The idea was that she wouldn't become a sports widow and I wouldn't have to become a complete-chick-flick-watching-loser-gelding (like the execs over at Anheuser-Busch).

It is a very simple deal. Here it is:

The husband is entitled to one sport and one sport league of his choice. The wife will not interfere with the husband's fanatical following the selected sport. Efforts will be made by the wife to prevent any conflicts or interference of the husband watching said televised events of the selected sport. If practical, the husband's attendance at live events of the selected sport will be supported and facilitated by the wife. The husband has no right to watch or attend televised or live sporting events which are not part of the selected sport. Although such activities on an irregular basis are not prohibited, they shall happen at the discretion of the wife.

The pre-nup was working great and everyone was happy. It was a good deal for everyone Then something changed.

See, when we got married, my choice was the NFL.

That's what I stuck with. I didn't push it.

I'm a huge Redskins fan. The NFL TV schedule was factored into timing for family events. My wife was so supportive that she worked it out so my daughter was born during the Skins bye week that year (that is some amazing planning on her part) .

Then my son turned two.

Which is when he decided that NASCAR is the greatest thing ever. He still does.

Those bright colors on the cars, pre-race flyovers, loud engines, wild crashes. That stuff is like catnip to a little kid.

Being the good daddy I am, we started watching races together. It's a bonding thing.

For a four year old, the kid's NASCAR knowledge is absolutely amazing. He can tell you what every single flag means. His hero is Jeff Burton (he picked with no input from me when he was two). He can recognize Richard Petty and knows he is The King. He can look at most of the top 20 drivers or their cars and tell you who it is.

He'll even see a FedEx, duPont, Lowe's or Home Depot logo and say, "I just saw Denny Hamlin's (or whoever) logo". However, I can no longer take him to Home Depot without fear of getting my #### kicked because he will always pipe up at the top of his lungs, "There's the crybaby."

Then my wife started watching with us and became an enthusiastic fan. My daughter even decided to become a Junior fan (although having to answer questions about what happened to his daddy was a bit rough).

So race day became family fun and nobody said anything about this being an issue with the pre-nup for over two years.

Then something clicked, my wife called me out on the pre-nup and announced I've got to pick.

She even says something about it to a business associate of hers. A huge Dolphins fan, he tried to help me out with a loophole. This man is a great American who clearly understands Man Law.

He told her, "CCR isn't breaking your pre-nup. NASCAR isn't a sport."

Amazing. Such a heroic effort. But is there any way I can even think about using that one without having my fellow NASCAR fans run a Gitmo style Code Red on me?

Besides, I'm kind of way out there on a limb saying NASCAR is a sport. I'm not sure I can get away with even trying to sell that one to her.

Training camp has started for the NFL. I've got to figure something out and I've got to do it fast.

There has to be another loophole.

Of course, I do have one piece of leverage I can use. I can drop the big one. It's guaranteed to work -- it always does when she uses it.


I'll just start withholding sex.

Jeff Gordon's Biggest Threat and the Best Driver at Joe Gibbs Racing Won Sunday

With almost cat like stealth Denny Hamlin has managed to put together a season that would be a career year for most drivers -- yet Sunday was only his 60th NASCAR NEXTEL Cup race.

The big NASCAR media has been focused on everything but Denny Hamlin this year.

The stories have been HMS dominance, Junior mania and the NEXTEL Cup inspection police going Rodney King on teams and drivers since they discovered the NAPA 55 car had replaced the fuel cell with the flux capacitor the stolen from the DeLorean in Back to the Future.

In fact, the most attention Hamlin had gotten this season was for car jacking a ride in the Milwaukee Busch race.

Meanwhile, Hamlin has been running up front all year. New Hampshire was his third win in his young career and first of the year.

What should scare Jeff Gordon is that this could have just as easily been Hamlin's fourth of the season.

He's also doing what Tony Stewart still won't: finish races. It is why Hamlin made The Chase last year and the face of JGR watched from 11th place. The #20 has been looking up at the #11 for almost all of 2007 and did so for most of 2006.

The #11's last DNF was in April of 2006--an absolutely incredible run. This year, he is number one in lead lap finishes and laps completed.

Hamlin has also shown he can be a contender at every type of track on the NEXTEL Cup circuit.

Things aren't perfect for Hamlin. The Milwaukee Busch series episode and the pit crew issues point to serious communications issue within the team. Those are the kind of issues that can turn into mistakes that let Gordon run away with the championship.

Those are also issues the team can fix.

It is important to note that New Hampshire was not Hamlin's best race of the season and the #11 wasn't the best car. His pit crew won the race.

Not just because they picked up the lead on pit road by going with only two tires, either.

Half way through the race, Juan Pablo Montoya (doing what JPM does best) crushed Hamlin's left rear. The #11 crew patched the thing back together with string, tape and bailing wire. The rear tires were smoking in the turns the rest of the race, yet Hamlin was able to put together some of the fastest laps on the track and didn't fall out of contention. What's more, Hamlin didn't lose his mind when it happened.

If this team can keep that kind of performance up, the big story of this season will be Hamlin upsetting Gordon for The NEXTEL Cup. They've got the driver to do it.

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