Who were some of the pioneers of the flamboyant NFL Touchdown Celebration?

Ernest Givens brought the world the disco-cool “Electric Slide.” Icky Woods got us grooving with his patented “Icky Shuffle.” Vai Sikahema occasionally showed us his “Punches of Power.” Randy Moss raised eyebrows with his “Man on the Moon” post-TD taunt. Warren Sapp once even did his best Beyonce impersonation. More recently, Steve Smith took a turn as both Captain Jack Sparrow and a cover girl, while Chad Johnson hit us with everything from “The Proposal” to “The Irish ####.”

To take the oft-maligned art of Touchdown Celebrating to the next level, current NFL stars would be wise to take notice of these non-ballers and their nifty moves (special thanks to YouTube.com, the site linked to show you these awe-inspiring performances)...

Carlton

The Fresh Prince of Bel Air’s Carlton has moves for days and then some… The Carlton Dance

Gene Gene the Dancing Machine

Chuck Barris’ boy and one of the biggest stars from The Gong Show... Gene Gone Wild

Bobby Badfingers

Regis and his crew should be ashamed. After all, who has more talent than… Bobby and His Fingers

Chunk

The Goonies biggest dweeb shakes what his mama gave him … The Truffle Shuffle

Napoleon Dynamite

Sikahema’s nephew (I’m flippin’ serious) doing what only he can do… Darrin's Dance Grooves

Elaine

Added due to popular demand, Seinfeld's own Elaine (best I could find)… The Little Kicks

Big Ern

Kingpin's Ernie McCracken (not his in-lane dancing, but "still very good")… "Hi... Not You"

Chris Farley

Chris Farley, God bless his soul, inspires Sapp's next celebration… Dancing King

Diva Receivers

So Carolina wide receivers/divas Steve Smith and Keyshawn Johnson are already fighting. Wow. Meshawn just got there and the season doesn't even start for another four months. Apparently, the two will be able to play together, but according to Smitty will remain on "agree to disagree" status. I'm going to have to take Smith's side on this one. After all, he basically willed the Panthers into the playoffs last year. He also had just about the finest season by a receiver that I have ever witnessed. His comeback from a shattered leg rivals John Travolta's Pulp Fiction resurgence. What caused this riff? Did Keyshawn actually expect to waltz into Charlotte and be "the man" after the Cowboys let him go for the biggest WR/diva of them all--Terrell Owens? Probably.

Speaking of diva receivers, it looks like Javon Walker is going to get a $40-million dollar deal from the Denver Broncos. As a Chiefs fan that just makes me wince. Can we please sign Ty Law already? Going back to the Broncos perspective, what I can't understand is that Jay Cutler pick. They could've taken former Memphis star running back Deangelo Williams with that pick. That would have made them the clear-cut favorite to represent the AFC in the Super Bowl next season. Personally, I think Jay Cutler has bust written all over him.

"Alien" invasion of MVP's layer

Steve Nash has officially repeated as MVP. That's just great. Now the most prestigious individual award from my favorite pro sport is forever tarnished. I read another blog today that really made me think. Steve Nash isn't even the best point guard that the Suns have ever had. That's no contest--it's Kevin Johnson. I guess that it's just hard for me to accept the fact that Nash will now be mentioned in the same breath as other back-to-back MVP winners like Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson.

Anyway, I think Nash and his Suns are in serious, serious trouble in their second round series with the Clip Ship. Sam Cassell, aka "the Alien", will probe away and expose Nash's defensive flaws. Shaun Livingston will also prove to be too quick for the floppy-haired Canadian. If Nash's ankle is still ####ed up, the Clippers will dismantle their Pacific Division rivals with relative ease. If that isn't enough, the Suns have a huge problem down low. How do they think they are going to be able to stop Elton Brand and Chris Kaman? They can't. I'm taking the Clippers in six.

Krstic goes ballistic?

New Jersey Nets F/C Nenad Krstic will continue to come of age during the Nets second round playoff series against the Miami Heat. If J.O., Jeff Foster and co. had trouble with Krstic, 'Toine and Udonis Haslem are in for a rude awakening. This guy is starting to look like the second coming of Kevin McHale, and that is very bad news for the Heat. Did I mention that the Nets have Richard Jefferson and Vince Carter both playing the best basketball of their careers? Considering that Jason Kidd is delivering these guys the ball, and that the Nets have plenty of bigs to throw at Shaq, I like the Nets chances. Unless Commissioner Stern and his goon squad are hell-bent on Dwayne Wade and Shaq making the Finals, I don't see Miami winning this series. In the end, the fearsome foursome of Kidd, Vince, R.J. and Krstic will be too much. I'm going with the Nets in seven.

Artest's Vision

The one and only Ron Artest has claimed that he will play for the Sacramento Kings next season for FREE if the organization brings back Head Coach Rick Adelman and talented, but problematic G/F Bonzi Wells. I happen to agree with Ron-Ron on this one, but if I were the Maloofs I wouldn't get too use to Artest being the franchise's voice of reason.

Man of his word

Oscar De La Hoya took the verbal assault of a lifetime from then WBC 154-pound champ Ricardo Mayorga leading up to Saturday’s fight. Mayorga called him a "b****", insulted his family, and stated a comment insinuating that Oscar's own people didn't even respect him that he capped off with "Mexicans in East L.A. are telling me to kick your ####." Oscar kept it simple, responding in Spanish: "You have disrespected me, my wife and my people; believe me, I'm going to knock you out." Saturday, he beat Mayorga's face in, finishing him off in six rounds by TKO. I've been very critical of Oscar in the past, but I have to pay him his due. He pummeled his opponent during last weekend's fight and made good on his promise.

"How to dismantle a bomb"

As the NBA playoffs move on, I will be running an ongoing series under this name. Each blog will give my blueprint for rebuilding playoff teams that bombed in the 2006 NBA Playoffs. The first two teams will be my beloved Indiana Pacers and my hometown Los Angeles Lakers. Watch out for those...