On the other hand, there is absolutely ZERO validity to the allegation that, in true Old Testament eye-for-an-eye, tooth-for-a-tooth fashion, that the Padres have requested that Bob Watson, baseball's vice president in charge of discipline, complete Winters' punishment by hurling the umpire to the ground, rupturing his anterior cruciate ligament in the process.
I know there's no validity to that rumor because, well, I pretty much fabricated the whole thing out of thin air. But I do think there'd be some value to MLB busting out Hammurabi's Code when disciplining its employees.
Proving once and for all that it really is the No Fun League, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has reportedly banned teams from using their cheerleaders to distract visiting teams.
According to Charley Casserly's report on the CBS pregame show, all 32 teams were sent a memo that stated, "No longer will (cheerleaders) be allowed to warm up in front of the visiting team locker room or do their stretching in front of the visiting team locker room. … The reason? Some players feel they were being a little distracted."
What? Look at that picture at the right. Are you telling me that's going to distract a professional from, um, doing … um, the job, you know … um, he's being paid for, hmmm …
In his capacity as deputy managing editor for FOXSports.com , Todd Behrendt takes sports very, very seriously. But he also fully realizes their capacity for being just as surreal as the rest of life. If not more so.
And no, Todd is not Rainbow Man. But he was hard pressed to find an image that more accurately conveyed the intended spirit of this blog.
