Museums exhibit priceless works of art.  The world boasts countless objects of near perfection.  Last night, fans were witness to one more: the Team USA’s first quarter against the Mexican national team.

Already boasting a 4-0 record in this year’s FIBA Americas Tournament, Team USA has been slowly reestablishing its international dominance…. and doing so with style and force.

For those unfamiliar with FIBA tournament rules, teams play four ten minute quarters (as opposed to twelve in the NBA) with fewer stoppages in play than the average NBA game as well.  Monday night, Team USA scored 45 points in ten minutes.

Briefly watching the sparse SportsCenter highlights does not do this team justice, for there’s no way to effectively capture the vertical dunk-fest that has become Team USA’s dominance of this year’s FIBA tournament.  So here’s an attempt to recap a near perfect first quarter, showcasing the world’s greatest basketball players playing an unbeatable level.

• Starting for Jason Kidd, Chauncey Billups set the tone early scoring five points in the game’s first thirty seconds, first by launching a three-pointer and then, by converting a fastbreak lay-up off a LeBron James steal.
• Off a missed Mexican lay-up, Amare Stoudemire kicked the rebound out to Billups on the wing.  Billups took one dribble, fed the ball up-court to LeBron, who drove, drew a double team and one-handed it out to Kobe on the left wing.  Kobe spotted Carmelo Anthony (who’s been making a living in the paint this tournament) under the basket for the bucket and the foul.  All five players touched the ball in a possession that took only eight seconds, longer than it took to read that paragraph.
• At the 6:41 mark, Carmelo nailed a three-pointer, giving him eight of Team USA’s fifteen points.
• After turning the ball over the previous possession, Kobe Bryant rattled home a shot from about five feet behind the three-point line.
• At the 5:20 mark, Jason Kidd entered the game.  Cue the highlight reel.
• LeBron pulled down a strong, one-handed rebound from above the rim, found Kidd running up the floor, who then got it back to LeBron on the right wing.  LeBron then took THREE Mexican players to the hole and drew the foul.  That possession took another brief, eight seconds.  In response to LeBron’s dunk, Bill Walton muttered “We’re used to that very much.  The Mexican players… I’m not sure that they’ve EVER seen anything quite like LeBron James."
•  In the first five minutes of the quarter, Team USA missed one shot attempt.
• Quadruple-teamed in the lane, LeBron spotted an open Mike Miller, who, rather than opting for the three, immediately whipped the ball to an open Amare Stoudamire for a signature two-handed dunk.
• Mike Miller drove the lane, attracting double-team coverage, but found a cutting Jason Kidd, who threw a two-handed touch pass to Carmelo behind the arc.  Carmelo drained it.
•  Dwight Howard, after being fouled, missed his second free throw attempt, which was then rebounded by Carmelo Anthony, who out-hustled three Mexican big men for the ball.
• Then, perhaps the most obscene play of the half… Carmelo grabbed a rebound from an errant Mexican three-point attempt and kicked the outlet pass to Jason Kidd running up the right side of the floor.  Kidd took one dribble and from BEHIND THE HALF-COURT LINE, threw a strike to Dwight Howard who snuck behind two Mexican defenders, then seemingly jumped over them for the alley-oop.
• After consecutive dunks by Carmelo and Dwight Howard, Bill Walton appropriately proclaimed “this is getting out of hand quickly.”
• Michael Redd launched a three-pointer… and hit.  So far, Team USA has only missed two shots in the quarter.
• On a commercial break that could not come soon enough for Team Mexico, Better Basketball offers a video, giving viewers the opportunity to “learn shooting from perhaps the best shooter in basketball history.”  I’m excited about the possibilities until I learn they’re talking about J.J. Reddick.
• Deron Williams played the two-man game to perfection with ‘Melo in the post, who then proceeded to dunk over the man covering him.
• After another dunk, Carmelo finished the quarter with sixteen points on 6-6 shooting.
• Fittingly, as the clock wound down, Deron Williams threw another alley-oop to Dwight Howard, who flushed it emphatically at the buzzer.

Team USA finished the quarter up 45-23.  Ten minutes, forty-five points.  To my recollection, Dream Team Jr. missed a total of four shots.

Critics will say not to get excited, that Team USA has only played Venezuela, the Virgin Islands, Brazil and Mexico, and that Argentina still remains on the docket.  But after years of recent disappointment and underachieving, the Americans are playing as expected.  Coach Krzyzewski is effectively managing his players’ minutes, while simultaneously keeping their eyes on the prize.  Kobe Bryant is shutting down opponents.  The American players have all checked their egos at the door and are feeding off each other’s talent. 

Yes, the United States is turning the ball over, but that’s to be expected with their up-tempo style of play.  At this pace, Team USA is looking invincible and is one more blowout victory closer to their ultimate goal:  an Olympic gold medal.

I listen to hip-hop and recognize it as an art form.

I don’t have a problem with occasional violence in the NBA.  I acknowledge that it is a contact sport and very often, emotions and adrenaline can get the best of a player.

I recognize basketball as a graceful and athletic competition among the best athletes in the world.

I respect the current talent in the league and don’t have a problem with that fact that the level of international play can now be placed on a par with our own, homegrown version.

I don’t have a problem with someone playing with passion, then arguing with the referee after he feels the ref made a bad call.

I don’t have a problem with the image of the NBA, but understand why certain people may.

Extensive tattoos on a basketball player do not bother me.  Nor do cornrows.  I choose not to judge that person, nor do I impose my will or opinions on others.  I recognize that as an expression of one’s own individuality.  What a person does with his body is his own business.

I trust and respect that the league is more knowledgeable and capable than I in assessing fines, penalties and suspensions when a player violates team or league rules.

I feel a person’s race, religious beliefs, and sexual preference have no bearing on his ability to play the game.

I enjoy All-Star Weekend.

I recognize that the game has evolved and is different, for better or worse, than the one played in previous eras.

I believe that the no-look pass, the fastbreak, the slam dunk and the buzzer beater are among the most exciting moments in all sports.

Basically, I love this game.

Say what you will about Isiah Thomas, his New York Knick team, playing short-handed, has won four or their last five, including three overtime victories.

Last week, after the Knicks game against Denver was marred by a late altercation involving Carmelo Anthony, Nate Robinson and others, Isiah was criticized for encouraging dirty play and calling for the hard foul that instigated the melee. 

Much to David Stern's chagrin, that fight seems to have been the driving force behind the Knickerbockers' latest charge.  Although five games under .500, they're only one game back in the Atlantic Division, and have recently beaten Chicago, Utah and Detroit.

Isiah's getting strong guard play from Jamal Crawford, consistent post-play from Eddy Curry and clutch rebounding from Florida Gator David Lee, who's averaging fifteen boards a game over that stretch.

A few more fights and a couple more victories and Isiah might just get to keep his job.

Let’s take a break from talking about sports, the T.O. and ‘Melo, Isiah and the B.C.S. for just a split second, shall we?

The holiday season always reminds me of family.  It’s a time when we all get together and enjoy each other’s company.  Well, when I think of family, I think dysfunctional. Hey, it’s what I know.  After recently watching “Little Miss Sunshine,” I felt inspired to compile my personal, top 10 list of all-time dysfunctional family movies.

First, let’s set down some ground rules before continuing.  It’s nearly impossible to compare dramas to comedies to thrillers, however, legitimate comparisons can be drawn between films that have similar, central themes.  For this Top 10 list, the dysfunctional family must be the focus of the film.  Although movies like “The Godfather,” “Raging Bull,” or “Do The Right Thing,” (all which would have made my list) highlight dysfunctional families in one respect or another, the dysfunctional family is not quite the central focus of the movie.  One might argue the family serves as the backdrop for “The Godfather.”  I’d respect that opinion.  However, I’ve kept it off this list to give other movies a fair shake.  Accordingly, here is my list of top ten “dysfunctional family” films of the past thirty years.

10. “Garden State” -  This movie’s got it all.  (I may be saying that quite often on this list)  Zach Braff’s character returns home from school for his mother’s funeral, where he confronts the estranged relationship that’s developed between him and his father.  He rejoins his high school mates and ends up falling for Natalie Portman (uh… who wouldn’t) as she helps him open up and cope with his mother’s death.  It’s a comedy, drama, romance all wrapped into one, not to mention the funniest scene featuring a character in full, body armor since “Monty Python and the Holy Grail” and “The Cable Guy."

9. “Parenthood” – Billed as a comedy, this film features its fair share of dramatic moments.  It tackles the entire gamut of family issues: relationships, infidelity, childbirth, divorce, sex, miscommunication, parenting and adoption.  “Parenthood” also features an all-star cast including Steve Martin, Rick Moranis, Dianne Wiest, Sam Robards, Keanu Reeves, Thomas Hulce and Joaquin Phoenix.  There’s not a scene in this film that doesn’t highlight and lowlight the family experience.

8. “The Upside of Anger” – When I saw the previews for this movie as it was released in 2005, I nearly barfed at the thought of another Kevin Costner playing another retired baseball player.  However, this film is far heavier than that.  At the foundation, we have Joan Allen’s daughters struggling with their mother’s alcoholism and their father’s abandonment.  “Upside” is not a chick flick.  Plus it features the smoky, Erika Christensen.

7. “Slums of Beverly Hills” – Alan Arkin plays the father of this traveling family, doing the best he can to raise his three children on a meager salary, while his brother makes millions.  Dysfunction runs rampant in this comedy, not to mention the vibrator scene with Marisa Tomei and Natasha Lyonne is a classic.

6. “Little Miss Sunshine” – Consecutive Alan Arkin films.  A fantastic script, this film will make you laugh and cry.  Greg Kinnear loads his homsexual, suicidal, intellectual brother-in-law, his silent son, and his heroine-shooting father into his ever-stalling and ever-honking, VW bug and leaves New Mexico for California to have his daughter participate in her dream pageant.  Dysfunction throughout, as witnessed in the final scene where the family bumrushes the stage at the pageant.

5. “Soul Food” – The essence of dysfunction.  This epic features a broad cast of characters and the division of  a once tightly-knit, family is the central theme.  Once the grandmother, the core of the family, passes away tragically, her surviving family is torn apart.  The grandson does his part to reunite the family, now distanced by several issues.  Not only did HBO base a series off this film, any time you can get Vanessa Williams, Vivica Fox and Nia Long on the screen at the same time, I’m game.  Williams’ performance is so convincing, she almost rids herself of her hotness.

4. “Kramer vs Kramer” – This film defined, in grim, emotional detail, what families going through divorce must confront.  “Kramer vs. Kramer” won five academy awards, including best picture and nods for both Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep.

3. “Ordinary People” – I’ll just say this.  I used to love Mary Tyler Moore.  After watching this movie, I can barely stand to look at her.  Now THAT’S acting!!!

2. “ Flirting With Disaster” – Hey, it’s my list and if I want to put a comedy at the top, I’ll do it.  This little known film (if you haven’t seen it, rent it) features another all-star cast, including Ben Stiller, Patricia Arquette, Tea Leoni and a list of surprise characters. Ben Stiller’s searches to find his natural parents and in the process alienates his wife, falls for the adoption agency psychologist, wrecks a tractor-trailer and some nice figurines, encounters two traveling homosexual detectives and eventually reunites with his acid-dealing parents, played by Lily Tomlin and Alan Alda.  Not only does this film redefine dysfunctional, it encouraged a string of films and television series to revive the careers of countless actors.

1. “American Beauty”  - I wanted to put “Flirting” on the top of this list, but this film’s resume cannot be argued with.  Released in 1999, it won five academy awards, including best picture, best director and best actor, and was nominated for three more.  The film features two neighboring dysfunctional families, including Kevin Spacey facing a mid-life crisis, the unfaithful Annette Benning, the homophobic, Marine colonel Chris Cooper, and his nearly comatose wife, Allison Janney.  If you weren’t moved by this film when you first watched it, you were raised in a vacuum.

Honorable Mention: “Meet the Parents” series;  the “Vacation” series’ “Family Business”; “Napoleon Dynamite”; “My Cousin Vinny”;  “She’s The One”; “Pleasantville”; "The Birdcage"; "The Royal Tennenbaums"; "What's Eating Gilbert Grape"

Again, these are merely my opinions.  If you haven’t seen the aforementioned films, I highly recommend them for your viewing pleasure.  If I failed to mention any, by all means, bring it to my attention and I’ll gladly stand corrected.

Happy Holidays and don’t forget to enjoy your family meals.