Part II

 

Offensive MVP and LVP Fantasy Style

 

Milwaukee Brewers

 

 

MVP: Gabe Kapler .291 .310 .582 .892 4-13-12-32 2-10-1

Runner-Up: Mike Cameron .269 .367 .654 1.021 3-7-6-17 4-8-0

Comments: I am using the two as a group. This has been a bright spot for the Brewers to start the season. Together they remind me of John Lowenstein/Gary Roenicke without the 25-game suspension and the fact one of the Brewers is not a left-handed hitter… other than that… I am cool.

 

LVP: Ryan Braun .268 .304 .465 .768 5-23-13-59 7-28-1

Bottom-Up: Prince Fielder .257 .372 .431 .803 4-20-16-47 19-18-0

Comments: both players do not belong on this list but given where they went in drafts… Their numbers do not add up to their production.

 

Minnesota Twins

 

 

MVP: Justin Morneau .284 .358 .495 .853 6-25-14-54 12-17-0

Runner-Up: Carlos Gomez .271 .297 .374 .671 1-8-17-40 3-26-13

Comments: If Morneau played somewhere other than, a state recognized for lakes they have (I am on record here to say that Minnesota does not have 10,000 lakes. Maybe they more or less… but not 10,000 exactly) he would be an All-Star regularly.

 

LVP: Delmon Young .263 .306 .307 .613 0-9-15-35 7-21-6

Bottom-Up: Jason Kubel .245 .264 .396 .660 4-17-11-42 3-22-0

Comments: Both players came into this season as great sleepers in AL-only leagues… yet both have been big disappointments for Fantasy owners but Minnesota is a top their division as I write tonight. Go figure.

 

New York Yankees

 

 

MVP: Johnny Damon .295 .394 .527 .921 4-14-25-59 19-20-5

Runner-Up: Bobby Abreu .306 .363 .452 .815 4-21-15-56 11-24-2

Comments: Damon is quietly putting up good Fantasy numbers, while Abreu is the glue right now that is holding the lineup together.

 

LVP: Robinson Cano .154 .214 .256 .471 3-8-7-30 8-15-0

Bottom-Up: Derek Jeter .313 .339 .393 .732 0-16-15-44 3-8-0

Comments: Cano signed a huge deal and is pulling a Carl Pavano right now while Jeter has yet to go deep or steal a base.

 

New York Mets

 

 

MVP: David Wright .284 .406 .569 .975 6-26-17-62 23-18-4

Runner-Up: Ryan Church .318 .382 .491 .873 4-22-23-54 11-24-1

Comments: Wright is a beast at third; you did not need me to tell you that. Church has been solid all year.

 

LVP: Carlos Delgado .213 .306 .361 .668 4-16-16-39 14-21-0

Bottom-Up: Luis Castillo .239 .343 .261 .605 0-4-11-23 4-7-6

Comments: It is time for Delgado to Delgottogo.

 

Oakland Athletics

 

 

MVP: Emil Brown .271 .296 .398 .694 3-26-19-47 4-11-1

Runner-Up: Bobby Crosby .268 .336 .402 .737

Comments: What can Brown do for you? Lead the AL in RBI.

 

LVP: Travis Buck .154 .197 .277 .474 0-6-5-18 2-20-0

Bottom-Up: Mark Ellis .237 .322 .359 .681 2-11-5-47 17-15-3

Comments: What does Travis Buck and I have in common? We both suck at hitting the curve ball… However, he gets paid to hit.

 

Philadelphia Phillies

 

 

MVP: Chase Utley .357 .432 .762 1.193 13-26-28-96 13-20-3

Runner-Up: Pat Burrell .330 .459 .687 1.147 9-30-20-73 26-24-0

Comments: Without Chipper Jones in the NL, Utley is the MVP. How do you not like Utley? Pat’s bat is hotter than Fergie in a bikini. Check her out in the May 5th edition of In Touch Weekly.

 

LVP: Ryan Howard .167 .294 .351 .645 6-14-16-40 21-45-0

Bottom-Up: Shane Victorino .231 .296 .292 .588 0-2-7-19 6-8-2

Comments: Howard is hitting something around .400 when he actually hits a ball.

 

Pittsburgh Pirates

 

 

MVP: Nate McClouth .323 .411 .606 1.017 7-25-28-77 17-16-3

Runner-Up: Xavier Nady .347 .406 .542 .948 4-30-19-64 10-21-1

Comments: McClouth is by far the biggest surprise in Fantasy this season on the offensive side. Reminds me of Eric Brynes… but better!

 

LVP: Adam LaRoche .202 .275 .303 .578 2-8-7-30 10-32-0

Bottom-Up: Freddy Sanchez .222 .250 .282 .532 1-11-10-33 4-14-0

Comments: I have officially given up on LaRoche. Pittsburgh fans know what I mean.

 

San Diego Padres

 

 

MVP: Adrian Gonzalez .302 .355 .556 .911 8-23-19-70 10-27-0

Runner-Up: See Above

 

Comments: In a big home ballpark, Gonzalez is putting up some nice numbers. I have him in a league that I cannot even trade him in because my knuckle-headed friends would rather hold onto David Ortiz or Carlos Pena.

 

LVP: Khalil Greene .220 .273 .305 .578 1-11-6-36 8-24-0

Bottom-Up: Jim Edmonds .181 .266 .241 .507 1-6-6-20 9-23-2

Comments: Greene has been disappointing so far and Edmonds has been pointless so far.

 

San Francisco Giants

 

 

MVP: Aaron Rowand .337 .383 .531 .914 3-15-12-52 7-26-0

Runner-Up: Bengie Molina .296 .324 .480 .803 4-19-9-47 4-5-0

Comments: It is nice to have a catcher like Molina on your team… just make sure it is the right Molina brother.

 

LVP: Ray Durham .253 .330 .367 .697 1-7-9-29 8-15-4

Bottom-Up: John Bowker .250 .268 .426 .694 3-9-4-29 2-16-0

Comments: I was going to put Barry ****s on the list but his head did not fit on the page.

 

Seattle Mariners

 

 

MVP: Ichiro Suzuki .279 .329 .375 .704 2-9-21-51 10-10-12

Runner-Up: Raul Ibanez .302 .345 .484 .829 5-21-17-61 10-18-0

Comments: If April showers bring May flowers, what does Mayflowers bring? Pilgrims. NO! It brings more Ichiro hits.

 

LVP: Jose Vidro .192 .248 .298 .546 2-18-12-31 8-14-1

Bottom-Up: Kenji Johjima .184 .245 .218 .463 0-5-4-19 6-5-0

Comments: I am very frustrated with the play of Johjima. The image of Jeff Clement in his rear-view mirror is closer than he thinks.

 

St. Louis Cardinals

 

 

MVP: Albert Pujois .358 .518 .604 1.122 6-23-18-64 33-9-2

Runner-Up: Ryan Ludwick .308 .386 .615 1.002 4-15-16-48 10-24-1

Comments: What elbow problem? Shoot, I hope I did not jinx him.

 

LVP: Troy Glaus .232 .318 .366 .684 1-21-9-41 15-25-0

Bottom-Up: Chris Duncan .271 .402 .400 .802 2-6-12-28 16-16-1

Comments: Glaus vs. Rolen… advantage M.D.’s

 

Tampa Bay Rays

 

 

MVP: Eric Hinske .279 .392 .581 .974 6-15-14-50 16-14-2

Runner-Up: B J Upton .286 .379 .429 .808 3-21-18-45 17-26-4

Comments: If you drafted Hinske in your AL-only league, good job. If you drafted Hinske in your mixed league, you are a liar.

 

LVP: Evan Longoria .239 .345 .437 .782 3-11-10-31 11-19-2

Bottom-Up: Carlos Pena .215 .323 .421 .743 7-17-15-45 13-35-0

Comments: Longoria will eventually hit. I think he is over-matched at times and looks like he has no plan at the plate. He has had some great at-bats (see Roy Holladay) but they are few and far in-between.

 

Texas Rangers

 

 

MVP: Josh Hamilton .300 .347 .531 .878 6-33-16-69 11-19-0

Runner-Up: Milton Bradley .320 .412 .495 .907 3-12-13-48 16-13-0

Comments: Talk about getting a second chance in life and taking advantage of it… Hamilton and Bradley both have been solid in the middle of that lineup.

 

LVP: Hank Blalock .299 .365 .460 .824 3-7-9-40 8-9-0

Bottom-Up: Ben Broussard .159 .225 .268 .493 3-8-8-22 5-20-0

Comments: Maybe it is unfair for me to put Blalock on this list, but coming into this season, he insisted he was healthy and proved once again that we should never trust a player’s opinion of himself unless we are in the company of Rickey Henderson.

 

Toronto Blue Jays

 

 

MVP: Alex Rios .310 .379 .474 .853 3-15-20-55 14-25-8

Runner-Up: Vernon Wells .273 .341 .405 .746 4-22-17-49 12-15-1

Comments: I just traded for Wells. What do you think of this trade; Wells and Giambi for Cust and Jenks?

 

LVP: Frank Thomas .167 .306 .333 .639 3-11-7-20 11-13-0

Bottom-Up: Aaron Hill .264 .323 .388 .712 2-13-11-47 9-16-2

Comments: Why would you want “The Big Attitude” on your team?

 

Washington Nationals

 

 

MVP: Christian Guzman .309 .331 .463 .794 3-14-20-63 5-12-0

Runner-Up: Felipe Lopez .281 .349 .344 .693 1-12-12-33 10-14-4

Comments: I have nothing for this team. New ballpark, same crowds.

 

LVP: Ryan Zimmerman .217 .252 .333 .585 3-14-12-43 6-23-0

Bottom-Up: Austin Kearns .212 .331 .292 .623 2-12-12-33 16-19-1

Comments: If Zimmerman is the face of the franchise, I am calling Joan Rivers for a referral.

Nationals… last in your program and last in my blog.

 

Fantasy geeks... like me might like this stuff.

Part II tomorrow

In the blog I will give you, each MLB teams Fantasy MVP and runner-up along with the teams LVP and bottom-up. I actually did some research on this, so please enjoy.

 

 

Editor’s note; statistics are retro to May 4, 2008 and are courtesy of ESPN. I will use the following sequence of stats for you to follow AVG, OBP, SLG, OPS, HR, RBI, R, TB, BB, K, and SB.

 

 

I will focus solely on offense today and tomorrow. Maybe a pitching column next week?

Here are the first 15 teams in ABC order... I know it sounds like a first-grader but Jackson-Five might be running through your head too... you will hate me later.

 

 

Arizona Diamondbacks

 

 

MVP: Conor Jackson .343 .421 .590 1.102 5-25-27-62 11-10-2

Runner-Up: J. Upton .342 .402 .559 .960 5-16-19-62 13-30-0

Comments: Jackson has been a beast while Upton needs to up the SB total to get his true value.

 

 

LVP: Eric Byrnes .242 .316 .417 .732 3-15-29-50 11-16-3

Bottom-Up: Chris Snyder .243 .375 .414 .789 1-15-17-29 13-21-0

Comments: Snyder’s numbers are not that bad but he came into this season primed to take over the catching duties for this team and with so much offense around him he should be posting better numbers. Byrnes is just off to a slow start.

 

 

Atlanta Braves

 

 

MVP: Chipper Jones .425 .472 .717 1.189 9-27-22-81 12-10-0

Runner-Up: Brian McCann .291 .358 .555 .912 6-17-17-61 12-9-0

Comments: Jones is MVP of the NL at this point. Who in their right mind would not take McCann’s numbers at the 2 position?

 

 

LVP: Mark Teixeira .267 .348 .442 .790 4-18-17-53 14-18-0

Bottom-Up: Jeff Francour .276 .311 .455 .766 3-20-16-56 6-12-0

Comments: Isn’t great to know that some jerk like me thinks the Braves worst two fantasy players are Tex and Francour?

 

 

Baltimore Orioles

 

 

MVP: Nick Markakis .273 .403 .473 .876 6-14-19-52 23-27-6

Runner-Up: Aubrey Huff .277 .352 .482 .834 5-19-18-54 13-22-2

Comments: Markakis is only going to get better. Huff is better served in AL only leagues.

 

 

LVP: Ramon Hernandez .198 .232 .374 .606 3-15-7-34 5-10-0

Bottom-Up: Kevin Millar .214 .285 .342 .626 4-14-16-40 11-19-0

Comments: I had the pick of the litter when it came to the offense of the Orioles. Remember this name… Matt Wieters… coming to a stadium near you!!

 

 

Boston Red Sox

 

 

MVP: Jacob Ellsbury .291 .415 .442 .857 3-12-25-38 17-9-11

Runner-Up: Manny Ramirez .317 .397 .567 .964 6-23-20-68 15-35-1

Comments: Ellsbury is my choice because he brings more to the table than I anticipated at the beginning of the season. He has been lights-out since day 1.

 

 

LVP: David Ortiz .216 .316 .379 .695 5-24-19-44 16-20-0

Bottom-Up: Jason Varitek .267 .315 .453 .769 3-11-7-39 4-22-0

Comments: If you want to throw-up in your own mouth check out Big Papi’s splits on home vs. road. To see V-Tek play this way is sad because I feel he was a true general on the field and a clutch player. Does Boston have another catcher ready in the minors?

 

 

Chicago White Sox

 

 

MVP: Carlos Quentin .283 .421 .609 1.030 8-22-22-56 15-17-2

Runner-Up: Joe Crede .248 .313 .585 .817 7-22-12-51 9-14-0

Comments: Quentin has been a pleasant surprise for Fantasy owners, while Crede might not have the batting average you want, he has hit big in the clutch (2 grand slams).

 

 

LVP: Nick Swisher .210 .354 .324 .678 3-8-20-34 23-29-1

Bottom-Up: Orlando Cabrera .220 .298 .271 .569 1-5-17-32 12-14-5

Comments: Did any one else expect bigger things from Swisher? Swisher so far is a big bust! Cabrera has a pass for the same cruise Swisher is on … The S. S. Minnow.

 

 

Chicago Cubs

 

 

MVP: Geovany Soto .333 .430 .618 1.047 5-23-15-63 18-26-0

Runner-Up: Derrick Lee .339 .418 .614 1.032 8-23-28-78 18-17-2

Comments: Lee is a MVP but when you get this type of production from your 2 position… he is my MVP.

 

 

LVP: Alfonzo Soriano .173 .222 .320 .542 3-10-9-24 5-16-3

Bottom Up: See Above

 

Comments: Sorry but the guy below has better numbers… see Paul Bako

 

 

Cincinnati Reds

 

 

MVP: Paul Bako .312 .384 .532 .916 3-11-10-41 9-18-0

Runner-Up: Edwin Encarnacion .275 373 .532 .906 7-15-16-50 17-17-1

Comments: The improvement in Encarnacion is worth noting… 17 BB and 17 K!!!

 

 

LVP: Adam Dunn .221 .375 .389 .764 4-13-15-37 24-24-1

Bottom-Up: Brandon Phillips .279 .321 .492 .812 5-15-17-60 8-25-5

Comments: See Atlanta Braves

 

 

Cleveland Indians

 

 

MVP: Grady Sizemore .277 .393 .446 .839 4-15-17-50 18-23-7

Runner-Up: Victor Martinez .347 .380 .411 .791 0-10-7-39 4-8-0

Comments: Sizemore is a stud… no question. Martinez… see below

 

 

LVP: Travis Hafner .209 .305 .345 .650 3-17-12-38 14-30-0

Bottom-Up: Victor Martinez (see above)

Comments: Hafner is killing Fantasy owners while V-Mart makes both list because he has yet to go deep while leading the AL in hitting.

 

 

Colorado Rockies

 

 

MVP: Matt Holliday .306.396 .521 .916 5-19-20-63 17-22-5

Runner-Up: Garrett Atkins .315 .341 .515 .856 6-22-17-67 5-21-0

Comments: Everyday in Colorado is a Holliday

 

 

LVP: Troy Tulowitzki .152 .226 .238 .464 1-11-10-25 9-17-1

Bottom-Up: Brad Hawpe .260 .398 .400 .798 2-12-12-40 22-23-0

Comments: It does not look good for Colorado. The pitching has sucked as well…

 

 

Detroit Tigers

 

 

MVP: Magglio Ordonez .311 .390 .529 .919 6-23-20-63 16-17-0

Runner-Up: Curtis Granderson .317 .440 .805 1.245 5-8-13-33 9-6-1

Comments: In my opinion, Curtis Granderson is the closest thing to Rickey Henderson without the third person reference.

 

 

LVP: Gary Sheffield .185 .340 .309 .649 2-5-10-25 17-18-3

Bottom-Up: P. Polanco .250 .345 .375 .720 2-9-14-36 12-7-1

Comments: Go get Polanco now. He is hitting again. Career .300 hitter!

 

 

Florida Marlins

 

 

MVP: Hanley Ramriez .317 .394 .563 .958 8-19-25-71 12-25-10

Runner-Up: Josh Willingham .341 .406 .637 1.043 6-16-16-58 9-16-2

Comments: Ramriez is the best Fantasy player in the NL… easily! Willingham flies so far under the radar. I would take Willingham over Francour any day.

 

 

LVP: Cody Ross .164 .186 .273 .459 1-5-2-15 2-8-1

Bottom-Up: Luis Gonzalez .226 .324 .403 .727 3-5-5-25 9-13-1

Comments: I feel I need to apologize to the Cody Ross family for printing his stats. NOT!

 

 

Houston Astros

 

 

MVP: Lance Berkman .325 .406 .702 1.108 10-31-30-80 17-15-4

Runner-Up: Miguel Tejada .349 .385 .579 .965 5-25-24-73 7-15-2

Comments: Berkman is making a case for MVP of the NL, while Tejada is making us forget his age again.

 

 

LVP: J.R. Towles .176 .309 .97 .706 4-10-7-27 8-14-0

Bottom-Up: Hunter Pence .254 .283 .439 .722 4-16-15-50 5-27-1

Comments: Nothing against Towles but he did get a lot of hype prior to drafts this season. I predict a big May and June for Pence.

 

 

Kansas City Royals

 

 

MVP: Alex Gordon .281 .344 .412 .756 3-12-17-47 11-27-2

Runner-Up: David DeJesus .333 .400 .456 .856 2-13-6-26 7-7-1

Comments: George Brett is not walking through that door, nor is Frank White…

 

 

LVP: Jose Guillen .171 .205 .316 .521 3-15-11-37 5-27-0

Bottom-Up: John Buck .247 .344 .377 .721 2-11-11-29 11-16-0

Comments: I hear Guillen is a Sesame Street fan. He can find it on the HGH channel. The letter B and the number 12 now sponsor him.

 

 

LA Angels

 

 

MVP: Casey Kotchman .330 .385 .554 .939 6-20-16-62 9-7-1

Runner-Up: Torii Hunter .314 .67 .534 .901 5-20-18-63 6-19-3

Comments: Most under-rated player in the AL is Casey Kotchman. He has been a better run producer than VLad.

 

 

LVP: Garrett Anderson .221 .258 328 .586 2-11-14-40 6-21-1

Bottom-Up: Vladimir Guerrero .256 .336 .402 .738 3-14-15-47 13-21-1

Comments: Be afraid… be very afraid

 

 

LA Dodgers

 

 

MVP: Rafael Furcal .369 .453 .585 1.038 4-15-33-76 19-15-8

Runner-Up: Matt Kemp .324 .348 .495 .843 2-22-18-52 5-30-7

Comments: Matt Kemp is one of the brightest stars in the NL right now!

 

 

LVP: Andruw Jones .163 .274 .255 .539 1-4-14-25 15-34 0

Bottom-Up: See Above…

 

Comments: I would like to take this opportunity to apologize on the behalf of Mr. Jones for playing like a softball player waiting to get to the bar to get his free pitcher of Miller Fat Me UP!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seventy-two offensive possessions this year for the Ravens. Well Chip how have they faired? I'm glad you asked. Let's dig into these drives a little deeper.

We have had 21 offensive drives start in the 1st quarter. The results 2 touchdowns, 5 field goals, 10 punts, 1 miss field goal, 1 pass intercepted, 2 lost fumbles. What a way to begin a game, yet this team is 4-0 when they score first.

We have had 17 offensive drives that have begun in the second quarter. The results 3 touchdowns, 5 field goals, 3 punts, 1 miss field goal, 1 lost fumble, 4 drives that have ended because of the half or for downs. Again nothing major here to speak of, but the Ravens are 4-0 when leading at halftime.

We have had 17 possessions that have begun in the 3rd quarter ( this is when you expect us to come through with points, right? You go in at halftime make adjustments to their defense and you come out and score. Surely the opponents aren't changing much to counter our offense, are they? We stink.) The results ZERO touchdowns, 7 field goals, 5 punts, 1 miss field goal, 1 pass intercepted, 2 lost fumbles, and a partridge in a pear tree, no actually one drive stalled because of downs.

We have had 17 possessions that have started in the fourth quarter. The results 1 touchdown, 1 field goal, 8 punts, 2 pass interceptions, 5 drives ended the game or turnover on downs.

Look at that we are 4-2, yet we have scored one stinking offensive touchdown in the second half our games. ONE people. Not good. We have scored points on 24 of the 72 possessions. That's 33.3%. But only 12% have resulted in a touchdown. That flat out spells stink to me.

I guess we should be grateful that we are 4-2 and not complain, yeah right. Look at our schedule after this week against Buffalo. We have the bye week to send a search party to locate our missing touchdowns. Than we have @ Pittsburgh ( 4-1 ), vs. Cincinnati ( they have beat us before at home ), vs. Cleveland ( better win this one ). I can see us winning two of the three playing the way we are right now on defense. But then guess who's next, @ San Diego ( I don't care who you are, this team can beat you, plus our third trip to the west coast this year ), vs. New England and vs. Indy. Who did we #### off at the scheduling department? The best part they both come here and both are prime time games. We finish with @ Miami, @ Seattle ( our fourth trip to the west coast ) and vs. Pittsburgh. We need at least a 6-4 finish ( giving we win at Buffalo this week ) to make the playoffs. Let's hope that search party finds those touchdowns and finds them soon.