Let's face it. Athletes are going to get most of the hottest women in the world. They've usually got a lot more muscles, without reaching putting on so many muscles that their veins constantly pop out of their skin, while I am so skinny I am mistaken for a mop. They have a lot of money, they are instanly recognizable at almost any place they walk into, and they get to retire at age 35. I am currently broke, am not rcognized by my own mother at times, and will probably be working until I am 88. So all I can do is oggle the lucky atlethes who get their picks of the litter.

 And what a litter! You can have your choice of Eva Longoria (Tony Parker), Elle Nordgren (Tiger Woods), Anna Benson (Kris Benson), Cynthia Rodriguez (Alex Rodriguez), Veronica Varekova (Petr Nedved), Heather Mitts (A.J. Feeley) and now even Paris Hilton is joining the fold, having supposedly latched on to Mr. Arizona, Matt Leinart. If you like to go a little older, you can choose Kristi Yamaguchi (Bret Hedican), Joumana Kidd (Jason Kidd), Shaune Bagwell (Jeff Bagwell), who once actually sold ad space on her breast, and Big Mac's Big Squeeze, Stephanie McGwire.You can have other athletes such as Mia Hamm (Nomar Garciaparra), Jennie Fitch (Casey Daigle), or Misty May (Matt Treanor). But there is only one choice for me if I could switch lives and wives with one athlete and that would be this man:

Do you recognize this man? You shouldn't because he hasn't done anything newsworthy in a long time. That man is the first ever draft pick of the Miami Heat, a Mr. Rony Seikaly. Why would I choose to make a switch with this man? Who's NBA career lasted 5 seasons, and was eventually run out of the league? Because every night, Mr. Seikaly gets to go to bed with this woman:

 

That is Mexican supermodel Elsa Benitez, and she is mighty fine. She has beautiful bronze skin, long flowing brown hair, and a affinity for animals. Plus, she is obviously more than willing to strut around a busy street wearing nothing but a bikini. How can you say no to that? She is my pick for the hottest athlete(ex-athlete) wife. And if you disagree, well, I guess that's your own opinion. It may be the wrong opinion but it is your opinion.

As for the second part of this contest, I think the above article should prove evidence enough.

I spent three hours working on finding suitable choices to give honorable mentions to for this article before finally coming to a decision. I give that same kind of time and effort to all my articles, even though I have not been able to write many as of late because of certain circumstances (lousy sibling). Anyway, even though I am young, and Canadian, I follow professional sports with an unbridled passion. I speak my mind on whatever topic I come across, and I try to do it in a way that may get a laugh or two. I give it my best, because that is all I can give. I take it one article at a time, I type with both hands like everyone else does, and I have a book of 1001 Sports Cliches. If I advance into the next round, I can continue to show why I deserve to be mentioned as one of the better writers on this site.

Thank you for giving me this oppertunity, and Cheers for reading.