Some brief, sarcastic comments on the last few days worth of Sports “news”:
Buggin’ Out—So Roger Clemens is going through his first (what would you call it, rehab start?) outing since rejoining the Astros, pitching for Class A Lexington Legends last night when his son approaches the mound during the third inning.
“Dad, I just wanted to tell you if you strike out one more guy, the entire crowd gets free wiper fluid.”
Upon hearing this news from Koby, the Rocket proceeds to get two more strikeouts, finding the motivation to retire the side. Now every time it rains or a bug splatters the windshield for the next month, people in Lexington will think of Roger Clemens.
I just glad Clemens wasn’t down there for “Mullet Appreciate Night” back in May—he would have had to go 1986 on everyone.
Just Sickening—No one should be overly concerned that Dwyane Wade has missed a couple practices because of lingering effects from the flu that hampered him in Game 6 of the Eastern Conference Finals. We’re talking about practice, man. We’re talking about practice.
What would really make Wade sick--and everyone else except Dirk Notwitzki--is if David Hasselhoff sang the National Anthem before one of the games in Dallas.
Hearing crickets—The College Women’s World Series match-up between Arizona and Northwestern drew more viewers than Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals, which pulled in a cool 611,000 households. Yep, Hockey's definitely making a comeback.
Take it easy, Champ, why don’t you sit the next couple plays out—Seems like there are quite a few major leaguers upset at Lastings Milledge for giving some hive fives to the fans after hitting his first major league home-run. This wasn’t during play, it was between innings on his way to the field.
Lighten up about baseball’s unwritten rules. Perhaps the crackdown on amphetamines has really made some players/managers cranky. Maybe most of these guys need to make peace with themselves for not doing the same thing on their first home-run.
He’s played 221 consecutive games (241 including the playoffs), basically turning himself into the NFL version of Cal Ripken. He returned a proud franchise to championship status with a win in Super Bowl XXXI and an appearance in Super Bowl XXXII. He’s become one of the most beloved quarterbacks of all time—and as fans he’s been given the benefit of the doubt on several (bad) occasions.
And with an off-season of posturing and indecisiveness, Brett Favre is throwing all those good things away.
The longer Brett Favre takes to decide whether he’ll come back to grace the Packers with his quarterbacking presence, the longer he falls into the abyss of egotistical star.
The dwindling number of fans who still stand by Favre say that he has the right to go out the way he wants—without being forced into something.
However, if Favre professes to love the Packers and their fans so much (and the game of football itself) he owes it to them out of courtesy for all they’ve done for him. Favre was given an extremely large grace period by Packers management, the media and the fans in deciding whether to retire or not. And he’s now abusing it like opposing defenses abused him last season.
Abused it by taking four months (so far) since the end of the Packers season to decide.
Abused it by forcing the Packers to delay their franchise’s plans for the future and the NFL Draft.
Abused it by letting a team that, to the point of extremes, values him and honors him to be this kind without any gestures of the same in return.
Abused it by saying last week about his indecision, “what are they gonna do, cut me?” Well, now that you mention it…
Abused it on Saturday by saying, “I know people are getting impatient, but enjoy baseball right now.” So is Brett telling the Green Bay front office, the players and the coaching staff to watch the Brewers and not worry about their jobs?
Is it me, or has he managed to make himself look like a hypocrite for his criticism of Javon Walker last summer. Pot, meet kettle.
Favre says he’s not sure if the team is going to be any better next season. To be fair to the Packers, with his stats from last year, it may not—injuries or not, Favre didn’t have a good year. It’s not like Brett is playing like Kobe Bryant and demanding talent from Green Bay because his prime years are being wasted.
Favre can’t use Roger Clemens as an example. Clemens is annoying enough for baseball fans who feel like he’s been courted harder than Cameron Diaz in Something About Mary (coincidently a Brett Favre film). Why? Because Clemens is independent of the Astros other plans. They may not be able to get another pitcher of his caliber, but they can get another starter who will be moderately effective, whether Clemens comes back, retires or jumps to another team.
It’s not that way with Favre. Whether or not Brett’s skills have diminished, or he just had an off year doesn’t matter—he’s the every down quarterback who controls and is in charge of this team. And Roger didn’t play his entire career for Houston. They were just pleased to have him for as long as they did.
No one, no matter who it is, is this much bigger than the team.
At this point, tensions are strained—and there’s a chance for Green Bay to part with their trademark superstar and not get torched by the media (even in the local papers). Favre’s negated his own leverage in the public eye, thereby giving the Packers the opportunity to set a deadline of 48 hours if they want.
If the Packers don’t hear from Favre and he’s still undecided, they can make the decision for him and cut him. This isn’t like cutting him two weeks after the season—or not giving him his time—they’ve been there and done that.
I’m not even sure Brett gets it; he’s Far-ve off on his interpretation of his place in history. He must not understand what he’s losing—his place among the all the time greats. Forget being adored from now until football eternity—Favre is in danger of having a footnote attached to his career and legacy.
He needs to get over himself and make a decision. We don’t owe Favre anything anymore for the show and the ride he’s given us. He owes us now.
Now that college basketball has concluded following Florida’s impressive 73-57 win over UCLA last night in the National Championship (maybe the theme song should have been from ‘Jaws’ instead of ‘One Shining Moment’)—we shift gears and change seasons—to the NBA playoffs and to baseball.
Opening Day of Major League Baseball always seemed a little silly to me—why celebrate something that will happen 162 times between now and the end of September? It’s a long season, as they say. In a strange way, that’s baseball’s beauty. It’s the ultimate Gladiator test—like an extended holiday vacation with your family or the NCAA Tournament—survive and advance.
Therefore, we shouldn’t get too worked up by the first day scores—there are still 161 to go.
That said, let’s open up a new feature called ‘Balls & Strikes’, where I’ll explore some of the events and players that are either bad (balls) or good (strikes).
Ball: A’s pitching gets an F. I know I just said it’s early, but when you’re the sexy and popular pick to win the AL this year, you don’t want to see your ace Barry Zito getting rocked like Apollo Creed against Ivan Drago in the A’s 15-2 loss to the Yankees. Zito was lit up by New York’s All-Star line-up for seven earned runs, highlighted by an A-Rod homer in the second. He left after 1.1 innings, with a strike-ball count of 30-29.
Strike: Curt Schilling looks good. Sure, I’m a Boston fan so you could ignore this paragraph and call me a homer, but you’d be ignoring a good piece of information. The Red Sox looked good yesterday in their 7-3 win over the Rangers, with Coco Crisp flashing some good glove in center field, David Ortiz going 3-for-5 with a HR and Mike Lowell adding his first home run (and possibly, his first hit) since 1996.
But it was Schilling who looked the best, going seven full innings and racking up a 117-pitch count on his way to the win. His only error was a misplaced pitch to Hank Blalock that ended up being a short home run to right.
No, I’m not worried about Keith Foulke—unlike ESPN’s Steve Phillips, I don’t overreact on Opening Day. Foulke hasn’t pitched since July 4 of last year, so though he got tagged a couple times, it should be expected that he’s going to look a little rough his first few outings.
Ball: Nats lose on a nasty call. It’s not like you expect the umpires to be in mid-season form on Opening Day, but did we have to start the ‘Limited Instant Replay’ debate so soon? Apparently, we did. How was Alfonso Soriano called out on that play at home? Is it just me or did the ump take the wrong angle in front of the plate, instead of on the side of the third base line? Within minutes, the TV cameras showed it as a horrendous call. I’ve never been in favor of replay in baseball, but with calls like this, it’s not taken much to persuade me of the benefits of LIP.
Strike: Bonds is stuck between a syringe and a hard place. Bonds had a needle less syringe thrown at him in the eight inning, but he responded well. He picked it up and placed it in his glove. Surprisingly, he seemed at ease with the situation after the game. It’s probably because he just got a free syringe and that’s one less to order next week.
Ball: Nomar Garciaparra got hurt on his first at-bat yesterday, straining a muscle in his side, something important, I’m sure. In fact, it’s a muscle most of the announcers yesterday said they didn’t even know existed. That’s because it probably doesn’t.) Rest easy Dodger fans, you’ll see him once or twice in June before he shuts it down for the season. I’m just surprised Grady Little didn’t tell him to stay out there.
Strike: Roger Clemens was at the Rangers-Red Sox game yesterday. “Retirement’s where I’m at right now.” Hey, Brett—I mean Roger, just let us know when you’re ready. The Astros, Rangers, Red Sox and Yankees are all pursuing and courting the Rocket like Oz, Jim, Finch and Kevin did the girls in American Pie.
Today’s count went full before we struck out the side. Here’s to a great 2006 season.
Before we
say good-bye to the year that was in 2005, I want to make some bold predictions
before 2006 rings in, just so I can have the opportunity, like any rationale
individual, to rub it in when I'm right, and immediately forget it if I'm
wrong. So here are some of my thoughts on what will happen in 2006.
1. In March, the Dominican
Republic will win the World Baseball
Classic.
I just like what the players from the Dominican Republic are doing to be
able to represent their heritage or their country. It's much more inspiring
than Alex Rodriguez taking the 5th and Mike Piazza wanting to play for team Italy.
What does that say about the United
States?
2. Roger Clemens, like it or not, will either be playing for the Yankees or
Red Sox in 2006 for his final season.
Clemens won't retire. He enjoys the game still, he's good at it, and he loves
money. Houston
can't really provide a place for any of that now until May 1. Roger doesn't
want to wait that long for his last season, since he'll be in shape from the
World Baseball Classic. It wouldn't make sense to work hard at getting ready
for the WBC only to wait two months to pitch for Houston.
Clemens doesn't want to go out with the woeful Rangers (even with Millwood
joining the staff). Why not go back to New York
or Boston?
Great rivalry, both fan bases would accept him back at this point, he'll get
the money he wants and he won't have to bat in the A.L. Oh, and that whole
family thing? It doesn't matter if he's only doing it for one season, just over
6 months--because he's definitely retiring after this.
3. The L.A. Clippers will make the playoffs;
the L.A. Lakers
will not.
And Kobe will
wonder why he picked the Lakers in 2004 instead of the Clips.
4. Neither the Pistons nor the Spurs will win the 2006 NBA Championship.
Yeah, I know the Pistons are tied with the '95-'96 Bulls for the second best
record All-Time after 27 games. Yeah, I know the Spurs are deeper than the team
that won the NBA title in '05. Don't care. The Pistons won't be able to sustain
this kind of play for another six months--injuries and Flip Saunders will get
the best of them. And the Spurs, as always, will be in one of those years where
Timmy D gets hurt at the wrong time and Michael Finley is exposed for what he's
become (a injury plagued non-factor).
5. T.O. will be in exile.
This is more of a hope than anything else. I'm sure Terrell Owens will end up
in Denver,
Dallas or somewhere else where they'll take a risk on the NFL's version of Ron
Artest. I just wished everyone would stop giving him the attention he craves
and let him sit this one out.
6. J.D. Booty, Rudy Carpenter, Vince Young and Brady Quinn will be the 2006
Heisman Finalists.
It'll be a QB love-fest in New York a little less than a year from now as the
surprise QB's, USC's heir apparent and Arizona State's young guy challenge
Young and Quinn to a throwing contest in the Trophy room minutes before the
presentation.
7. Notre Dame will face USC for the National Championship in College
Football. The USC truck just keeps rolling behind LenDale White and J.D. Booty, the
defense gets a year better, but...so does Brady Quinn, Darius Walker AND
Charlie Weiss.
8. We'll hear more about steroids in '06 than we did in '05 when the first
major superstar is busted.
Don't know who it will be, but it will happen. The timing is perfect. Say, is
Barry Bonds coming back for long?
9. The Boston
Red Sox will win the AL East.
I'm probably jinxing the living heck out of my team, but New York's pitching is
weak, despite their line-up, and once Clemens chooses Boston, Tejada makes his
way over to the good guys, the Sox will be strong on both sides of the field
and hold off the Blue Jays for the East title in late September--as the Yankees
watch the playoffs from home.
10. The Chicago
Bears will shock everyone and win the Super Bowl over the Colts in February. Ok, that wasn't a bold pick; that was just me being selfish and wantingthe Bears defense to shine brighter than the Colts
offense this post-season.
Nearly two
years and two months later, I'm still in shock. Game 7 of the 2003 ALCS,
Red Sox leading the Yankees after seven innings in Yankee Stadium. Red
Sox star pitcher Pedro Martinez enters the dugout to high fives, back slaps and
applause from his teammates. Everything Martinez
does in the next two minutes indicates he's done for the night, with the Red
Sox up 5-2 over their arch-rivals from the Bronx.
And then it happens.
Grady
Little doesn't take out Pedro Martinez. Pedro gets rocked in the 8th inning
for three runs, tying the game. A short time later the Yankees win on
Aaron Boone's home-run in extra innings.
After the game, Little approaches Pedro and thanks him for pitching the 8th
inning. Reportedly, Little tells Pedro he probably won't be back in Boston in 2004.
He couldn't have been more right. Not long after, his contract as
Manager of the Boston Red Sox was not renewed, and he was replaced by Terry
Francona. Eleven months later, the Boston Red Sox won the 2004 World
Series, ending 86 years of frustration and reducing the inferiority complex of
Red Sox fans to Yankees fans.
Little had to wait out the bad vibes for two years, but on Tuesday was named
Manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers. It would seem all's well that ends well.
The Dodgers
are about to find out that's not necessarily the case. Sure, the Red Sox
won the World Series after Little left, but there is still the belief they could
have won it in 2003 if it weren't for him. Red Sox fans, like myself,
still can't watch the replays of that Game 7, still ask themselves why Little
left Pedro in and still wonder what would have happened if he'd just taken him
out.
Not that I can't let it go or anything.
But I wonder, are the once proud, fallen-on-hard-times Dodgers in for a very
painful season? It's hard enough to stomach a 71-91 record like they had
in 2005, especially for a franchise like the Dodgers, which has seen Sandy
Koufax, Orel Hershiser and Mike Piazza. This team won the 1988 World
Series.
I guess my question is, what the heck is Tommy Lasorda thinking? Is he
not aware of Little's rep?
Does he not know that Little had been told, again, reportedly, before that ALCS
Game 7 that Pedro had a 100-pitch limit, that Little was to pull him no matter
what? Does he not know that order came directly from Red Sox GM Theo
Epstein and other Boston
management? And if Lasorda does know this, why would he hire Little?
Look, I'm all for forgiveness and second chances. But Little began making
seriously questionable managerial moves way before Game 7 that season. In
September of that year he left Pedro in too long in another game. He
repeatedly took out his best hitters in questionable situations, taking away
strong bats in the line-up for "defensive upgrades" in the
field. Was there really that much of a difference between 2nd Basemen
Todd Walker and Damien Jackson? No.
Grady Little doesn't learn from his mistakes. He doesn't handle pressure
well. And he has a hard time listening to his superiors. Which
makes him a perfect fit for Detroit or Kansas City, not L.A.
On Tuesday, Little said of the Game 7, "That was in the past the day after
the season was over, as far as I'm concerned. We know where that
organization was when we got there, we knew where it was when we left."
He also said that he didn't pay attention to the frustration of Red Sox fans,
saying that was just Boston's
want to win.
But I've got news for you Grady, it's like that in L.A. too. The thirst to win baseball
championships is strong with the more historic teams, like the Yankees, Red
Sox, Reds and...the Dodgers. Make a managerial mistake in May managing
the Devil Rays, no one cares. Make one in August for the Dodgers and
it'll be warmer than usual the next day in L.A, because the press and the fans
will fry you.
I'm just wondering what will happen when, if the Dodgers are in the 2006 NLCS
against a hated rival-- like the Giants-- and their ace pitcher has gone the limit,
will Little replace him? Or will Little be replaced himself shortly after
the Dodgers lose?
For the 2006 L.A. Dodgers, I've got "Little" expectations. Now
for 2007...
One More Baseball Thought:
The Houston
Astros will not be offering Roger Clemens salary arbitration,
which basically means that Clemens is done in Houston. The Astros wouldn't be able to
negotiate anything with him until May 1, 2006. Thus we should assume
Clemens is, in fact, going to retire.
Not so fast...There are some factors to rundown why Clemens will be pitching
(and for yet another team) in 2006:
1) He'll already be in shape.
Clemens has committed himself to pitching in the World Baseball Classic, which
begins in March, for team U.S.
Since this is the inaugural event, it would leave me to believe Clemens will
take this seriously and work himself into pitching shape...just like a spring
training.
2) He likes money.
It's no secret the Rocket loves dollar signs, and I'm betting that there is
someone out there willing to pay him $18-$20 million dollars for one
season. That's basically the range he'd have if he was granted salary
arbitration. And while Clemens loves driving his kids to school in Houston, there's
something that tells me one seven month stretch away from home--even if the
distance is long--will be an interesting proposition.
3) He's got Rocket fuel left in the tank.
At 43, he's a physical specimen. He had the lowest ERA in the majors
again--with no run support. He just gets better and better.
As a Red Sox fan, I never thought I'd suggest he come back to Boston, but a one
year rotation of Clemens, Curt Schilling (who'll be healthy) and Josh Beckett
would, quite frankly, be surreal. Enough time has passed that the wounds
have healed over. Until Clemens comes to a decision, I'll be sending him
copies of Dave Loggins 1974 hit song, "Please Come to Boston".