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[SPOILERS!  Do not read if you are a 24 fan and haven't yet seen the premiere.]

 

Last night, I was a shocked witness to former President David Palmer's  assassination.

I sat through the presentation stunned--   a litlle, squeaky voice inside my head:

      that didn't just happen. that's just not right.

I woke up this morning realizing it all eerily echoed the recent fall of another Palmer.  Cincinnati Bengals QB Carson Palmer.

On Jan. 8, when Steeler's lineman Kimo von Oelhoffen rolled into Carson's left knee, I initially thought little of it.  But then Carson didn't get up; Kimo looked penitent and helpless.  The announcers and crowd were numbed.

I watched the remainder of the game with little satisfaction.  Over and over, I thought:

     that's just not fair.  it shouldn't happen that way.

I felt bad for Palmer, von Oelhoffen & everyone in the stadium.  I hate to see injuries of any kind.  To start the Divisional round watching players drop in Seattle was almost too much.

I like the sounds that accompany football: audibles, grunts, the thud of a caught pass, the crunch of a tackle, a little trash-talkin'.  And when I see a player getting in a ref's face and suddenly being ejected, I think, "Oooo.  Wish I coulda heard what HE said."

But I am thankful I couldn't hear what was happening on the field Wild Card Weekend in Cincinnati.  

Being a lifelong soccer player, I define ligament injuries as "Bad Things Happening to Good People."  Just a couple years ago,  I was three yards away when my close friend and teammate collided with an opponent and rolled to the ground.  Clutching her knee and her ankle, her agony was immediately evident .  Players from both teams formed an instinctive cocoon around her.  Some in close to assess the injury, a teammate offering his hand to squeeze, another running for ice.

The majority of players and the fans kept the right respectful space, bowed their heads and hoped to see her shake it off and get up under her own power.  When her husband and another man carried her off the field to take her to a doctor, everyone applauded.

We continued the game and played hard, but the emotional energy of the game was snuffed.  The thoughts in my head were far more stressful than, "It's not fair." 

How do the NFL pros manage it?  Over the course of their careers, I can't imagine how many moments like that players have seen.   Surgery in almost an assumption, both during and after their sports careers.

There is the relief of human resilience.  Early reports were saying Carson Palmer's injury was career-ending.  Now his ACL and MCL are repaired and he's expected to be back.

My friend also required ligament surgery.  She has since returned to soccer and when we play against the man who collided with her, she gives him a hard time.  It's a shared experience we can laugh about and then it's on the field for fun and business.

So maybe I'll survive the loss of a tv character.

But the phrase "torn MCL" still makes me nauseous.