josh q. public
by: JoshQPublic
Public Knowledge
May 23, 2007 | 9:34AM | report this

Josh Q. Public:  Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?  ~Winnie the Pooh

Public Knowledge: 

1.  One unhappy camper.  One very unhappy camper.  Hello muddah, hello faddah.  Here I am at Camp Granada.  Camp is very entertaining, and they say we’ll have some fun if it stops raining!  Will it ever stop raining at Camp Greenada?  First the Truth and Tony Allen go down.  Down goes our playoff hopes!  Then the tanking.  The lottery banking.  Turned out to be as worthless as the Central African Republic FrancingYi Jianlian?  Really?  A poor man’s Pau Gasol.  A destitute man’s Pau Gasol.  A hobo’s Pau Gasol.  Can’t we just trade the pick for the real Pau Gasol?  I’m beside myself right now.  Wahhhhh!  I wanted the Gigantic-O.  I hate him now.  Wahhhh!  I was all right, for a while.  I could smile for a while.  But I saw you last night.  You held my hand so tight as you stopped to say hello.  Oh, you wished me well.  You couldn’t tell that I’ve been crying over you. 

2.  Now for the good news.  The Sox bring those damned Yankees back down to earth.  Back down to the crust.  No, the mantle.  Not to be confused with the Mickey Mantle.  No, the core.  Not the craw, the core.  My love is rotten to the core.   Ain’t talkin’ ’bout love.  Just like I told you before, uh before.  Ain’t talkin’ ’bout love.  Babe it’s rotten to the core.   The Yankees are rotten to the core and not even Rocket Roger Clemens or Prince Phillip Hughes can save them.  Do you have Prince Phillip in a can?

3.  More Yankees talk.  Jason Giambi.  Giambi Juice.  Are we even talking about this if he were hitting just a little bit.  No, no, no, no, no. You insulted him a little bit.  You got a little bit out of order yourself.  I’m sorry. You insulted him a little bit.  If he was hitting just a little bit would the Yankees be trying to nullify his contract?  In the name of morals?  Give me a break.  And now amphetamines?  What a drag it is getting old.

4.  So the Blazers get my man.  They get the Gigantic-O.  They’re gonna be good.  Real good.  You left in a hurry with a guy from the band.  On a one way ride to the Promised Land.  Top of the pops.  Greg Oden will take Zach Randolph, Brandon Roy and the rest straight to the Promised Land.  Mister I ain’t a boy, no I’m a man.  And I believe in a promised land.

5.  I’m sick of this Pacific Northwest bias.  Seattle and Portland.  Like my main man Gob Bluth always says: C’mon!

6.  Keyshawn Johnson has declined an offer from the Tennessee Titans and has decided to retire.  The NFL will miss this guy.  I wish someone would still be giving him the damn ball.  Big Mouth?  Yes.  You talk too much.  You never shut up.  I said you talk too much.  Homeboy, you never shut up.  Ya, he may talk too much, but he was one of the hardest working men is show business.  He will be missed.  I remember the Rose Bowl.  I remember watching Keyshawn catch twelve balls.  Catch twelve balls for a Rose Bowl record 216 yards and 1 TD.  I remember watching the Trojans roll to victory over the Northwestern Wildcats.  Keyshawn rolling to victory winning the MVP.  For ol’ SC.   Fight on to victory.  Fight on!  He’ll be fighting on in the booth.  It’s a shame.

7.  Clinton Portis is a dope.  “I don’t know if he was fighting dogs or not.  But it’s his property; it’s his dogs. If that’s what he wants to do, do it.  You know what I want to do?  I want to let my Pit, Pepsi, have at it with ole Clinton.  That’s what I want. 

8.   Jean-Sebastien Giguere.  Like my boy Chompers always says:  I want my chef’s Italian, and I want my goalies Canadian.  You listening Ryan Miller?  How bout you Rick DiPietro?

9.  Happy belated birthday Julian Tavares.  Julian picked up a win on his 34th birthday last night.  Not for nothing, No Yankees pitcher has more wins than Mr. Tavares.  Mr. Wang, no offense, is tied with three.  Roll Sox, roll!

10.  Do the Spurs lose a game from here on out?  I don’t just mean the playoffs, I mean, from here on out.  Tony Parker has been playing out of his mind.  The Big Fundamental has been dominating.  I honestly don’t see them losing again.

11. Wanna know how much I hate Zeke? Huh? Do ya? I was secretly hoping the Knicks would get the number one pick. That’s how much. That’s how much I feel feel for you, baby. How much I need I need your touch. How much I live, I live for your loving. That’s how much, that’s how much. That’s how much, that’s how much.

Public Acknowledgements:  AA Milne, Spike Jones, Roy Orbison, Get Smart, Van Halen, Jimmy Conway, Rolling Stones, Smithereens, Bruce Springsteen, Arrested Development,  Run DMC, The World Wide Leader and Ambrosia.

Peace out homies.  Six Two and Even!

13 Comments | Add a comment   categories: NFL, NFL, NBA, MLB, MLB, NHL, Boston Celtics, Boston Red Sox, New York Yankees, Keyshawn Johnson, Jason Giambi
 
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total comments: 13      Page 1 of 1     
Miracle
May 23, 2007
10:43 AM
Good stuff Josh.

Painful to be a Celtics fan. And it ain't getting any easier.

JoshQPublic
May 23, 2007
10:49 AM
you know, as much as it hurts not to get those ping pong balls, the celtics weren't that bad b4 the injuries. i think rondo will be good. i dunno. i'm numb. i really wanted oden. i really did.

Magic53
May 23, 2007
10:53 AM
Can you say hosed, Boston shout it out, Stern done washed away your new center with a ping pong ball. Memphas, I can't hear you screaming foul either. Portland and Seattle count your lucky charms. Sorry Josh!

SA actually might not loose another game, Duncan looks like a man amongst boys out there.

JoshQPublic
May 23, 2007
10:57 AM
thanks magic. the fix was in. i think you're right about them spurs. jingling and jangling away to a ring.

Last edited by JoshQPublic on May 23rd at 11:00 AM.

Miracle
May 23, 2007
11:16 AM
Duncan doesn't look like he's even trying very hard.

The #### tons will make it difficult, but I think the Spurs will prevail.

JoshQPublic
May 23, 2007
11:19 AM
i honestly dont know how hard the pistons will make it for SA. 5 games. max.

Nooch
May 23, 2007
1:53 PM
Josh,

Tough break for the Celts. Oden might have been positively Chief-like at the Fleet.

On the bright side for Bostonians, the Sox are absolutely rolling right now. Even if they hit a rough patch at some point, they have such a lead that it probably won't make much difference.

Oh, and the Pats look loaded again.

As Meatloaf once said, two out of three ain't bad.

Good job. Keep up the good work.

JoshQPublic
May 23, 2007
2:01 PM
thanks nooch. i'm on my way to the old ball game now. roll sox roll!

slshusker
May 23, 2007
2:17 PM
Lottery winners tend to lose their double wide during the spring. Stay tuned to see if Seattle and Portland are still around in a month.

Could Seattle end up staying there instead of moving to OKCity?

I'm still sick to my stomach about this lottery.
I NEEDED the Celtics to get pick 1 or 2.

Larry used to pack the house during MVC games.
I always found a way to get to a game or two.

1steelerfan1
May 23, 2007
2:36 PM
I'm later than usual today....too much to do. Awesome coverage of what's what. Are the lottery balls weighted? I've got two shepherd/wolf mix dogs that have something special for Portis, Vick, and his cousin. Yanks are going to be fine. You know quality takes time like a fine wine. Hope Oden likes rainy weather 'cause he's in for it...ha ha. Great stuff Josh.

MeanDovine
May 23, 2007
3:48 PM
My sympathies, bro. I was truly pulling for you last night. Where now?

54fulltiltfulltime
May 23, 2007
9:30 PM
Losing out on Oden really hurts this team with even the #2 worst case they take Durant or trade the pick and a youngster for an impact veteran(O'neal,Garnett,Gasol) the #5 will not get that done

In my opinion they should take Corey Brewer at #5 and maybe take a chance on ex BC eraser Sean Williams at #32 at least that will improve them right away defensivly wich was a huge weakness for them this past season.

54fulltiltfulltime
May 23, 2007
9:35 PM
I think they should starve Vick and Portis for one week then throw them in a locked cage with a bucket of the Colonels Original Recipie and have them fight to the death.

Now that would be justice!

My minny dachsund Mr. Guiness would kick Pepsi the pitbull's ####. lol

Last edited by 54fulltiltfulltime on May 24th at 1:30 AM.

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JoshQPublic
josh q. public. For the public, by The Public. Irreverent sports opinion from a Bostonian in New York. The one blog to read, when you’re reading more than one. Good to the last drop! Listen to The Gashouse Gorillas on internet talk radio

Josh Q. Public

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