In a number of ways, Super Bowl XLI feels like the first time for me. I've never truly experienced the game from an invested fan's perspective and it's lead to some interesting internal questions. For example: why can't the NFL sell a decent looking hat?
Since I was 12, I've been sporting the same script "Bears" hat (similar to this one, only 15 years older) and I made a deal with myself that if Chicago made it to the Super Bowl I would upgrade my headwear in celebration and support of such a magnificent achievement.
The requirements for said hat were simple: it can't be orange, it should feature the classic 'C' and that alone, writing or small graphics on the back are acceptable but the sides must be unmarred, and no stupid striping would be permitted especially on the bill. It was to be the sort of cap, navy and unstructured, that I figured would be available in every gas station between Rockford and Carbondale and just a few mouse clicks away on-line.
Nope. Everything seems to look painfully similar to this, but maybe karma will reward me in the long run. Changing your gamer before the big game might not have been the best idea anyway.
But in the twisted sort of logic that defines my daily existence, I next began to wonder if simply buying Prince's "When You Were Mine" off iTunes--something I've been meaning to do for months--would be an ample show of support for XLI (although I suspect the artist formerly known as The Artist Formerly Known As himself might be a Vikings fan).
You see, aside from enjoying the lead-up to the game more than ever before, I'm also excited for the halftime show for the first time since I got Bee Bop Bamboozled by Diet Coke's 3-D halftime show in 1989 when I couldn't find the glasses at any of the local retail outlets.
The more that I think about it, Prince might just be the perfect choice for Super Bowl halftime entertainment. He's hot mom tested and hipster approved. Regardless of race, creed, sex or age, everyone agrees that "When Doves Cry" is a damn fine song.
So what took so long? I've always wondered why the NFL insisted on booking their halftime show like they were providing the entertainment for a 40-year class reunion. Aren't 18 to 34-year-old males the "coveted demographic?" Those people don't want to see Sting!
Honestly, I'd have no problem if Prince took up a 10-year residency at the halftime show like some luminary at a Vegas casino, but since that seems unlikely to happen, I've developed some rules for the NFL to follow when considering future candidates for halftime entertainment:
1. If you couldn't see the artist in one of the multi-million dollar commercials then they don't belong on the stage. You know why you didn't see any "Pimp Juice" commercials featuring Nelly during Super Bowl XXXV? Because, despite being the "#1 Selling Hip-Hop Energy Drink," whatever that means, PJ couldn't afford a spot on Super Sunday. Maybe this was an indication of the temporal nature of Nelly's popularity. Just follow the hip-hop and marketing lead here; if it don't make dollars, it don't make sense.
With that said...
2. Give us something slightly on The Edge and I don't mean U2. Prince has songs that would make a porn star blush and that's a large part of his appeal as a Super Bowl performer. Will everything be squeaky clean and family friendly? Probably. But the potential is there for something crazy to happen and in a time where Paul McCartney was praised for being uninteresting the year after Nipplegate, I like that.
3. Nobody enjoys old-timer's games. I love the Rolling Stones and I understand their greatness, but I still have no interest in seeing them in their current state and that's not a statement on their present potency. I'm sure they're still great. They could announce a tour tomorrow and it would sell out within an hour, but everything that made them great happened 30+ years ago. I would've loved to experience the power of the Stones in their prime, but I missed that boat and all the plastic surgery in the world can't convince me otherwise.
I'm sure there are a number of people who will disagree with me on this point, but you can't always get what you want. Sorry.
4. Flavors of the month are just as bad. What do Right Said Fred, 98 Degrees and the Lyte Funky Ones (nee, LFO) have in common? They were all universally crappy and none of them ever appeared at the Super Bowl, but Kriss Kross, Los Del Rio, 'NSYNC and the Backstreet Boys all did. All I'm asking for is a little foresight here, which could be tricky considering that we live in an age where anything that is cool today will be liked by more people tomorrow which makes it totally uncool to the people who initially thought it was cool yesterday, but here's a hint: don't read Pitchfork.com because nobody knows who any of those bands are. Paste or any band currently featured in a car commercial will provide much better options.
In fact, this leads me to scratch Rule No. 1 as I'm pretty sure Lance, JC, Joey, Chris and Justin were shilling for somebody back in the day.
Nevertheless, it shouldn't be that hard going forward. All the NFL needs to find is an artist currently in their prime, possessing an undeniable edginess/sexiness that implies something extraordinary could happen, with enough credibility to appease tastemakers without offending the tasteless, whose best albums weren't all recorded prior to 1980.
But if that's not enough o####uideline to go by, I've taken the liberty of preparing a list of qualifying musicians: Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Prince and Willie Nelson.
My first reaction to Prince at the Super Bowl was "wow how ancient could they get? Prince is so over that this is a clear stupid selection"
My second reaction to Prince at the Super Bowl was "good choice. Super Bowl people are older and monied p[eople and Prince is probably still hip to this bunch".
My final reaction to Prince at the Super Bowl is I missed the Janet Jackson "#### shot" at halftime because I was doing what I will be doing when Prince is on stage and what I've always done at the Super bowl during halftime. Going to the Bathroom, Filling up a plate, talking to the wife who isn't interested in the game and to those others in the house who have a conversation going because I wouldn't let anyone talk during the actual game. In other words? I don't care who performs at halftime of the Super Bowl. This column was more interesting to me than halftime at the Super Bowl.
P.S. I would be interested to know how you got type to go down the side of the photos since I can't seem to get it to do that on my blog.
And by the way? i saw Dylan last October and his voice is gone. Totally gone. Didn't even recognize the trademark Dylan voice. He's over 60 now and I worship the guy but you don't want him singing at the Superbowl. Trust me. If they want an oldies at the Super Bowl and who would absolutely be fitting and tear the stage apart for the type people at the super bowl? The Eagles. Nobody does it better live. NOBODY.
Last edited by TheReturnOf on January 29th at 7:15 PM.
Good thoughts. Yeah when the rock bands need nurses to push them around the stage, that's called reaching for it. I would go for Jimi Hendrix at any age, but that won't happen. I could handle some Eric Clapton though.
Hi Plains...no doubt Prince is entertaining, but not my cup of tea, and he does beat Ashlee Simpson, Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan. Gawd...are these the choices we have come to choose from? I would rather see a classic rock band than Prince, but what the heck? I'll just make some more guac at halftime.
PS...nice post!
You're a man after my own heart, Drifter. I love Prince. I just hope he plays a medley of my/our favorites instead of ambushing us with a plethora of never before heard hits from some upcoming album, which the mercurial Superstar has been known to do.
Fine job.
Best ...
Last edited by MeanDovine on January 30th at 2:20 AM.
Great blog. I don't think Dylan would ever do it. I could be wrong, but it just seems like it would hurt his image.
A few months before the last Super Bowl I saw the Rolling Stones and they were very much at the top of their game. But when they rolled the "B" stage out into the audience the sound was spotty. When I heard them on the Super Bowl broadcast the whole thing sounded like the "B" stage sound. It was the muddiest mix I ever heard.
I have to say this about Dylan and God knows I'm a disciple but we went to see him last October for my birthday. There were 5 of us and we had excellent seats and he played keyboard the whole time, leaning on the keyboard like it was holding him up and bob is looking REALLY OLD. His voice was gone, he forgot lyrics, his band was shabby looking, I mean they just didn't look like professionals, like he found them in an alley. I was just happy to be in his presence but this was not a good thing. Even if he would do it, the people in the super bowl audience would just go "whaatt?"
Last edited by TheReturnOf on January 30th at 2:31 AM.
TheReturnOf: Prince doesn't feel old to me. He's still putting out compelling albums if not giant hits. As for his fanbase, its got to be at least 20 years younger on average than McCartney or the Stones'.
As for Dylan, I saw him approximately 5 years ago and didn't noticed the slippage you mentioned, but that was a while ago. His albums have continued to be good but I'm sad to hear he might be faltering.
TheReturnOf: Oh, and to answer your formatting question: with the photos I generally just choose the paragraph I want them in and put the cursor at the front. I insert the photo and select either 'Left' or 'Right' for the layout. From there, I set the Border Thickness around '2' and then use '5' for both the vertical and horizontal margins.
Just when I thought the halftime show couldn't get any worse after the Rolling Stones last year, we get Prince this year. The powers to be go crazy over Janet Jacksons ####(which was nice), but they allow a crossdressing #### to do the halftime show. Someone on that board must also like purple.
anybody with issues with prince should just quit listening to music or at least refreain from talking about it to anyone. Prince is quite possible the greatest guitar musician of all time. he was a millionaire before he made his first solo album, rocking out for all the stars. i witnessed the death of proper pop music in the early 90's. anyone who's ever been to prince show, knows that he rocks the house.
i mourn for an entire generation of children who dont understand his musical genius. i'm a classical trained musician, so i obviously disdain candy-pop music. i love things kids these days dont get like melody and progression. i do enjoy hip hop, but i would never call any of it classic. Prince is a classic. every rapper knows prince. every guitarist worth his salt knows prince. its the public thats ignorant. too bad. reminds me of those black thugs that robbed rosa parks. when asked if they knew who she was, they didnt even recognize the name. how far have we fallen.
lisa4usc: There are only two kinds of people in the world: Prince fans and those who have yet to become Prince fans. (Sorry, I like to speak like I'm a C-list celebrity on "I Love 1989" whenever possible.)
But I'm willing to give you some time, simply for using the word "guac."
another note: i teach at a school full of children who never knew michael jordan as a basketball player. they think lebron is the greatest thing on the court. they never saw joe montana dismantle a defense. they dont remember bret favre running around the field looking for someone to hug.
Mean: Always a pleasure. Song choice will be crucial come halftime of this year's game and I can't see Prince eschewing any of the traditional faves, but who knows? He did set out on the "I Ain't Singing Raspberry Beret Any More After This Tour" a little over a year ago...and I'm still kicking myself for missing it.
(Aside: Allow me to submit Delonte West for Best Damn Guard consideration. After watching him in person for the past month I've been incredibly impressed especially when you consider he's trying to pilot a ship made of driftwood.)
Dudski: I wondered the same. Would Dylan do it? I'm not so sure he would, but I'd still love to have him and I'm not even a huge Dylan fan.
As for the Stones, I don't doubt that they still put on a fantastic show. I know a number of people who caught their Fenway gig and they all thought it was the greatest things since Exile on Main Street, but for me I could never get past the fact that it's not 1968.
There's no real threat if I see the Stones tomorrow that I'll get smashed with a pool cue and somehow that feels like a loss in my mind.
deomincume: First off, thank you for responding with vigor in your initial comment. It said a lot of things I didn't and probably couldn't have done as well.
Your Jordan-Prince paradigm is interesting. Growing up in the Jordan years and following him to retirement (thrice) I just assumed that it would be a long time before any challengers to The Greatest crown would come around. But sadly, it seems to be more a case of outta site outta mind and it's kinda sad that that's all it takes.
Personally, should I ever have young'uns I'm making sure that they are familiar with the Jordan catalog and I'm pretty sure that this is how you become "old" but I'm perfectly fine with that.
Demon- as far as Prince being able to play a guitar, I agree with you 100%. He probably is one of the best musicans ever. I just don't like to listen to him sing. If he would sit and there and play a guitar then I would like him. And how in the hell can someone think that LBJ is the best ever. I thought that was Kobe.(sarcastic as can be)
the 2nd is horrible. i wouldnt wear that to my own funeral.
why does the one pictured above have a chargers lightning bolt on it? take that jagged edge off between the white and orange/orange and blue, and it wouldnt be half bad....then i might get one...if i was a bears fan.
prince has to be like 30 years younger than the rolling stones, doesnt he? that still makes him old enough for golden meadows assisted living for the elderly, but it's a start in the right direction...kinda. i'll consider watching halftime when they hold a victoria's secret fashion show...with no private changing rooms.
Great point on the NFL hats, Brandon. Doesn't seem like the NFL can ever figure out a hat that doesn't make normal people look stupid. They always look great on the sidelines, but when you get them home and aren't wearing shoulder pads, they usually lose some luster.
Just pony up the cash and buy an NFL helmet. That's what I did, and I wear it everywhere. Nobody messes with you when you got a helmet on, mostly because they think you're crazy.
As for Prince, he's like a born-again Seventh Day Jehovah's Witness, and he renounced many of his past songs, especially the sexy ones, so I think it's safe to say we're gonna hear "Let's Go Crazy" and "Little Red Barbaro."
Hi Plains, I dig your logo. Has a very early 80s Atari feel to it.
Love Prince. He produced, directed, played, sang, and composed ALL of his work before the unbridled age of 18. Rarely do we find musical geniuses like Prince. Probably the most talented musician of my generation.
cuziffer: My best guess is that the Chargers motif was maybe supposed to represent a 6-inch gash from a bear claw? I don't know. I just don't understand why every inch of space has to be occupied by some sort of design.
You know the best thing about Joe Gibbs return to the NFL? He got them to make a decent hat for him to wear. Probably demanded it.
We're a long way removed from days of Tom Landry and Bum Phillips.
Ty: I think you're right. It might be the shoulder pads that do it, or maybe it's just the fact that when you're in uniform, wearing stripes on your sleeves, pants, socks and shoes, a few more up top couldn't hurt.
crookdnose: While I love your helmet idea, it won't work for me. When the Alltel salesperson tried to convince me I needed to add the Motorola bluetooth earpiece to my new cell phone, I told him the only one I would accept was the coach's headset I see on NFL sidelines every week.
So far it's working pretty well for me. The mouthpiece flips out of the way when I'm not on the phone (hardly ever), it let's everyone know I'm important and a clear demonstration of personal disgust is only a quick slam away.
As for the avatar, I was hoping for more of an American Gothic sense of forboding but I guess I'll take Pole Position. I dig yours as well.
Nostradomus: I'm with you. The talent is undeniable but there seems to be at least a portion of the populace who isn't looking forward to it.
The Dan: Ooooh, that's a good one. Usher is essentially Michael Jackson before he was crazy with a touch of Fred Astaire thrown in. Lot's to like for a lot of people.
I've been a Prince fan since the late 70's. THE musical genius of my generation. First halftime show I've looked forward to since this concert trend has started.
However, I'm opposed to this concert hype in general. What you're saying is, "our product can't draw in enough viewers by itself. We need a gimmick." & the Super Bowl isn't like that. Title games, in every sport, should be about the game & the fans who have been glued to every second on the game clock since the openeing match. Not for the casual fan who might choose to watch something on Lifetime if it weren't for the halftime show.
I would throw Guns N Roses in the ring for halftime performer...who hasn't been to a football game and somewhere along the game hear "Welcome to the Jungle?"
Didn't Aerosmith do it one year? I can't remember, I've had the pleasure of working the past 4 super bowls at a sports bar/pizzeria...and when you're slinging drinks, you don't really get to watch. Anyway, Aerosmith is possibly the best show I've ever seen.
Anyway, I do like Prince in the SuperBowl. I doubt he'll sing "Nikki" though...
Hee1Bi11y: I don't have a problem with the half show itself, it's become its own twisted train-wreck of a tradition. But the fact that it is extended from the normal length does trouble me some.
RecSoftballHero: Aerosmith did perform a few games back, maybe with Nelly. And if we could unite the original G'n'R I'd be interested, but they might fall under the "out of their prime" exemption.
You don't want G n R. It's 7-2 that Axel Rose would throw a fit 5 minutes before showtime and refuse to come out. The guy from all reports is getting worse than he used to be.
(raises hand) I'm 60 and I like Usher A LOT. I think the kid is good.
(obviously I'm reading the blog from bottom to top. Why wouldn't I? that way you can make a complete fool of yourself by posting almost exact duplicated of what has already been posted. heh)
The Super Bowl halftime show is such a tough thing to get right. The audience is probably more diverse than any other event of the year!
Though you shouldn't try to please everyone I think a blend/medley of the current top performers in each of the most popular music styles would be appropriate.
As for Prince, I've never understood his appeal, but if you HAD to have him as the Super Bowl halftime show, shouldn't it have been in 1999!!!
sportthink: Well done. Allow me to respond American Idol-style:
1. Beck--100% yes. I now hate myself for not thinking of him. It would be magic, who knows what you're ever going to get from Beck?
2. The Beastie Boys--I'm a little concerned they may not be in prime form anymore, but I'm willing to see more. On to Hollywood...or Miami, whatever.
3. Big & Rich--No, no, no, no. Tehcnically, I'm pretty certain that they fail under the flavor of the month corollary, but really they're disqualified by the unwritten rule of I freakin' HATE them. My enjoyment of College GameDay the past two years has decreased 74% due to the inclusion of Big & Rich to kick things off.
They're just not good, dawg...but that's purely personal opinion.
I hear you on the hats. Keep the old school gamer going. As you said, changing hats before a big game probably isn't a good thing. It would be like changing QB's. Doh!
As for hats marking a special achievement, they generally have to have the team logo or name, the NFL logo, the year, and the acheivement on it. That's a lot of stuff going on. I suspect that it's extremely difficult, if not impossible, to make such a hat look good.
As for halftime, isn't then when we all go outside and tear our rotator cuffs tossing the old pigskin around?
Looking at those caps makes me wonder why my brother is embarrassed to be seen with me when I wear my Honolulu blue backet hat.... oh, wait...
Except for Prince, that list comes from similar cloth. I'm trying to think of some non-Americans or ladies. The edgy factor is tricky... would Peter Gabriel or Bonnie Raitt qualify? Is Liz Phair still relevant?
The best live act I've ever seen was Bela Fleck, but I doubt he & the Flecktones fit your #1...
Guess they could bring back Martina McBride, again questioning the edgy...
This is tough. You have high standards! Prince it is! He does have a presence and a memorable catalog... Should be pretty good.
Why don't they just have the Victoria's Secret fashion show at halftime? Men would obviously approve, and I doubt women would disapprove, since they'll be in the kitchen fixing our dinners at halftime.
HiPlains ..... As we aren't gonna' have a repeat of the wardrobe malfunction. Then I'm somewhat disappointed. I'd long to see either one of Shakira's mammaries just fall out whilst she's winding and grinding those sultry hips of hers. That'd certainly be better than seeing The Rolling Stones once again. Will Jagger mount the stage wearing a colostomy bag this time ? Whilst all that is happening you'll have Richards stoned out and his Beltone malfunctioning. And what of Ronnie Wood and Charlie Watts you might ask ?
Well they're probably wondering whether or not they remembered to put on their Depends that morning. Don't get me wrong they're still relevant to the music scene but the NFL certainly doesn't know what the audiences really want in terms of major entertainment when it comes to the Superbowl. Half the time they're just swing for the fences and more likely than not they tend to miss with that monumental swing of theirs.
prince is an impresssive musician guitarist in particular (my principal diet is alan holldsworth john mclaughlin joe pass george benson, pat metheny/kurt rosenwinkel/john abercrombie. hats off to the fellow.
The requirements for said hat were simple: it can't be orange, it should feature the classic 'C' and that alone, writing or small graphics on the back are acceptable but the sides must be unmarred, and no stupid striping would be permitted especially on the bill. It was to be the sort of cap, navy and unstructured, that I figured would be available in every gas station between Rockford and Carbondale and just a few mouse clicks away on-line. 
The more that I think about it, Prince might just be the perfect choice for Super Bowl halftime entertainment. He's hot mom tested and hipster approved. Regardless of race, creed, sex or age, everyone agrees that "When Doves Cry" is a damn fine song. 
