Poor Lovie Smith. The Chicago Bears training camp is starting tomorrow and, according to a report published Tuesday by the Associated Press, the Bears head coach says the battle for the starting quarterback's job between Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton is "dead even."

If you're a Bears fan, the emphasis on that particular quote is undoubtedly on the word "dead." Having a quarterback controversy between those two guys is a little bit like trying to decide whether you would rather be trapped without hope of rescue in a burning building or on a sinking ship.

Speaking of sinking ships, is there anyone who really thinks a record of better than, oh, say 8-8 is too terribly likely no matter who wins the "competition?" Unless the Monsters of the Midway bring back most of the defense from the 1985 World Champions, the guys on the other side of the ball will probably not have enough firepower to overcome the offensive stagnation that's going to take place on so many Sunday afternoons, Brian Urlacher's $18 million contract extension notwithstanding.

And let's not bring up two years ago, either. Sure, Sexy Rexy led Da Bears to a Super Bowl appearance, but expecting that to happen again, given Grossman's history of maddening inconsistency and Orton's limited experience and lackluster numbers when he has gotten to play, seems like a stretch even the most optimistic Bears fanatic might not be capable of managing.

The bright side, of course, is that anyone concerned about the quarterback battle has been waiting months for football to start up again, so at least you have something to talk about. And what the heck, right now everyone's tied for first, so enjoy it while you can.

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