Mike Greenspire Knows Best
by: Greenspire
Pirates to Hold Open Tryouts for 1st Base Job
Jun 26, 2008 | 7:48AM | report this
After last night's embarrassing 10-0 loss to the New York Yankees, the Pittsburgh Pirates announced today at approximately 10:12 AM Eastern time that they will hold open tryouts for the starting first base position.

The position is currently held by always-struggling Adam LaRoche, who had a bad game both offensively and defensively.

The requirements listed by manager John Russel are as follows:
Must have:
  • Two arms
  • Two legs
  • A head
  • A pulse
Anyone that can fill all four of the listed requirements can tryout today from 12:00 PM EST all the way to 5:00 PM EST. They will be held inside PNC Park.

Only one man can win the job, so make sure you get down there quickly!

Thanks for the contest, JOKERSWILD!

-Mike Greenspire
19 Comments | Add a comment   categories: Mike Greenspire, MLB, Pittsburgh Pirates, New York Yankees, Adam LaRoche
 
« Continue reading Mike Greenspire Knows Best
total comments: 19      Page 1 of 1     
canyondave
Jun 26, 2008
8:03 AM
Funny.

JOKERSWILD
Jun 26, 2008
8:31 AM
MIke-its signed up--and I'll come out of retirement to try out even though first base isn't my favorite position- I like third base more if you know what I mean..

thesupposedbuckles
Jun 26, 2008
10:30 AM
Sid Bream lives in the area, maybe we can sign him up. Haha. No he can stay far away from the Bucs. LaRoche will be gone in another year, because there is no chance they re-sign a guy who decides to take the first three months off.

justanotherfan
Jun 26, 2008
10:55 AM
Greenspire
Rumor has it that the Pirates are prepared to exhume J Howard Marshall IV's body and have his DNA cloned along with that of Anna Nicole Smith's. Wherein they'd have him play 1st base and Anna pinch hit and run for him.


jhowardmarshall.annanicolesmith

Do ya' like my body Howard ? Well do ya ?






At least we'd know that it'd have the Pirates' fans entertained rather than witnessing what they've got on show at present.



justan' aka tophatal .......

aero13
Jun 27, 2008
9:24 AM
I played a little first base in little league,I'm right handed,but can hit from the left side, and I work cheap.

Last edited by aero13 on June 27th at 9:26 AM.

PF
Jun 27, 2008
9:48 AM
Roster spots of Jason Bay and Andy Laroche are up for grabs.

goTO
Jun 27, 2008
7:28 PM
I hear Stephen Hawking is ready to go...

ilovefootballmorethenyou
Jun 27, 2008
9:10 PM
Hey Mike: If there is no prior experience required I am the man. I have experience at package shifting and spitting sunflower seeds. Very Funny post. Take Care.

odds
Jun 28, 2008
10:25 AM
i have a three year old who could do a better job than adam...granted he would be walked a hell of alot!!!! HA! HA! HA! but aleast he would be on base.... ILMAO!!!!!

great funny green!!!!

volfan69
Jun 28, 2008
10:47 AM
Is this a contest? LOL Very Funny!

Greenspire
Jun 29, 2008
11:46 AM
Thanks, guys! Enjoy your Sunday!

-Mike Greenspire

kalbrecht_17
Jun 29, 2008
7:14 PM
I heard they're asking Tiger to play while he recovers. Don't know if he makes the 2 legs requirement though.

underage
Jul 4, 2008
11:03 AM
It's Fourth of July We hope this brings on the cheerful times of Red, White and Blue from us to you!!!

Love always,
underage

justanotherfan
Jul 12, 2008
7:15 AM
Mike
Is the impending sale of the Steelers going to be inhouse or is the franchise being sold to an outside entity ? There've been rumblings as to which course the Rooneys are about to take once and for all. What's your opinion on it ?




justan' aka tophatal .........

jon_464
Jul 12, 2008
8:36 AM
Michael Jordan's available, last I heard.

tigervidmar
Jul 12, 2008
9:30 AM
where have yo gone ...roberto clementi.

justanotherfan
Jul 13, 2008
7:26 AM
jon'
I hear that Alyssa Milano is also prepared to tryout as a pinch hitter for the team ?
As we all know that Milano digs 'the long ball' and guys with a 'big bat' .
I'd dare that she'd make many of the guys feel at ease ?

alyssamilano

Take it off , take it off !





alyssamilano2"/

I may not know how to pitch but I do know how to shag and catch a few fly balls.














...................

tigervidmar

Clemente was one of the greats and were he on the Pirates at present . I doubt that he'd be satisfied with the Pirates in their present guise. And even though they had that astonishing win they're still pitifully abysmal.


justan' aka tophatal ............


Last edited by justanotherfan on July 13th at 7:36 AM.

justanotherfan
Jul 13, 2008
7:26 AM
jon'
I hear that Alyssa Milano is also prepared to tryout as a pinch hitter for the team ?
As we all know that Milano digs 'the long ball' and guys with a 'big bat' .
I'd dare that she'd make many of the guys feel at ease ?
...................

tigervidmar

Clemente was one of the greats and were he on the Pirates at present . I doubt that he'd be satisfied with the Pirates in their present guise. And even though they had that astonishing win they're still pitifully abysmal.


justan' aka tophatal ............

justanotherfan
Jul 13, 2008
7:26 AM
jon'
I hear that Alyssa Milano is also prepared to tryout as a pinch hitter for the team ?
As we all know that Milano digs 'the long ball' and guys with a 'big bat' .
I'd dare that she'd make many of the guys feel at ease ?
...................

tigervidmar

Clemente was one of the greats and were he on the Pirates at present . I doubt that he'd be satisfied with the Pirates in their present guise. And even though they had that astonishing win they're still pitifully abysmal.


justan' aka tophatal ............

Page 1 of 1     
Add a comment  
ABOUT ME


Greenspire
slots
free counter I am Mike Greenspire and I am a sports blogger for FOX Sports and I love the NFL, NHL, MLB, NBA, and NASCAR! I was born and raised in the city of Pittsburgh, PA, so naturally I am a die-hard fan of the Pens, Buccos, and Steelers. Since Pittsburgh basketball is long gone, my favorite team in the NBA is the Orlando Magic. Please leave a comment on my blog, I love feedback. My blog is fun, and I enjoy writing it, and I hope that you will enjoy reading it! Thanks!
MySpace
Sports Logos

MySpace
Sports Logos

MySpace
Sports Logos

MySpace
Sports Logos
ButtonGenerator.com http://www.bu
ttongenerator
.com/index.ph
p Mike Greenspire Knows Best at Blogged
MY FAVORITE BLOGS
Seriously
pittsburgh_mike
's Blog
SoCalSportsFan'
s Blog
Crookdnose
The Noise Factor
SportsinaCan's Blog
KP's Blog
Norcalfella Unfiltered
kellyscott's Blog
fishburn's Blog
Half-Baked Ravings
Chin Music For Your Ear
gcoach's Blog
Rated "GI": For Generally Immature Audiences Only
Spector's Blog
broncogirl's Blog
Thank You. I love you all.
jon_464's Blog
The Fowl Line
'SotaSports
JoeSportsmanshi
p's Blog
A Homer's Blog
sixfigurefan2's
Blog
Musings and Ravings
Walking Eagle
tigervidmar's Blog
THIS IS MY OPINION - WHAT IS YOURS
Fuzzboss's Blog
3 parts gin, 1 part vermouth
All Things Considered
broblog's Blog
The Youngest Sports Writer's Blog
Best blogger alive.
Hatchetman's Parade of Sports
The Human Side of Sports
FullTilt's Corner
Tellin' It Like It Is With The Real Truth !
John Halpin's Fantasy Sports Blog
Everybody's Talkin'
The Village Idiotte
Leading With My Chin!
ruffnecks's Blog
Your One Stop Shop For Everything St. Louis Rams
The Backbay ####deck
"I Just Wasn't Made For These Times"
empty3's Blog
$8 Beers
The Great Lakes Report
Straight From the Horses Mouth!!!!!!!!!
The Twelfth woMAN
Antiquity Says
Can't Get A Word In Edge-Wise!
Straight Talk From the Left Coast
Chip's Corner of Info
Southern Hospitality
netsteeler's Blog
The Bay Area Blues
what the hell did i just say????
MoonDog's Musings
Fourth and inches.........
...
Bolt Backer 21's Blog
The Continuing Madness
Dashmans's Blog
TheBuccaneer87'
s Blog
divineswine's Blog
Im Happy Are You ?
St.Louis Sports Fan
Cboy4evr's Blog
TALES-FROM-THE-
DARK-SIDE's Blog
The Fantasy Report
AFC-West with The Joke
LS' blog
Lupus G.'s Take On It
jaguarjoe72's Blog
My Tampa Bay Sports Blog
RALPHF2008's Blog
The Great Lakes Report II
sf801608's Blog
Guerra13's Blog
Time stamping is done in Pacific Time.