SAN FRANCISCO. The San Francisco Giants today designated pitcher Barry Zito for reassignment and acquired the contract of Mariah Carey, a shake-up intended to "send a message" to the faltering left-hander that "everybody on this team has to earn their paycheck" according to general manager Brian Sabean.
Barry Zito
Zito, the former Oakland A's ace who is in the second year of a lucrative contract with the Giants that pays him $14.5 million annually, is off to the worst start of his career with a record of 1-8 and an earned run average of 5.53. Carey, on the other hand, has become a fan favorite in San Francisco due to a ceremonial first pitch she threw out before a game last week that bounced to the infield turf almost as soon as she released it.
"Barry's got the best 12-to-6 curveball in baseball when it's working," said Giants pitching coach Dave Righetti, "but I'd have to say that Mariah's went from 12 to like -1."
Carey: "This sign means 'squeeze play'."
Carey is a singer-songwriter and alleged actress who made her debut in 1990, quickly becoming the first recording artist to have twelve singles in the Billboard Top Ten at the same time. "I was never very good at math," she told Rolling Stone magazine at the time, "and it really helped when I started out."
Like Zito, Carey was accused of being overpaid when an $80 million contract she had signed with EMI's Virgin Records was bought out for $28 million. "I was so mad I told them to just keep the change," Carey said of a period in which she suffered a physical and emotional breakdown. "They didn't give me a personal assistant like they promised and I had to count some very big numbers all by myself."
GerbilSportsNetwork
In all reality they wanted to sign porn star Mary Carey but no one in the Giants' front office was intelligent enough to actually know the difference between the two.
One sings and the other goes down for breakfast lunch and dinner.
Gerbil Sports'
It's allegedly the same thing with Janet and Michael Jackson. But in all reality I don't think that Michael'd be flashing anything unless it were at young kids.
Makes you wanna' scream !
See my post within this forum titled Usain Bolt Was He Really That Fast Or Was The Field That Bad ? I'll look forward to reading your comments as and when you're ready. Chimin' out.
Con Chapman is a Boston-area writer. He is the author of "The Year of the Gerbil: How the Yankees Won (and the Red Sox Lost) the Greatest Pennant Race Ever," a history of the 1978 AL East pennant race, and a number of plays, including "Number One Hockey Mom," "Please, Pope," and "What Mickey Belle Isle Told You," a trilogy about hockey (JAC Publishing). His work is available on Amazon Shorts (at 49 cents a dowload), and he writes on sports for Flak Magazine.
