GerbilSportsNetwork's Blog
by: GerbilSportsNetwork
Hockey Fans Agree--The Uniforms Were the Problem
Jun 22, 2007 | 12:10PM | report this

BOSTON.  As the Boston Bruins unveiled their new logos and uniforms yesterday at the TD Banknorth Garden, the sentiments of long-suffering fans of the team were echoed across the country.  "There was nothing wrong with the NHL--and I mean nothing--that a new set of uniforms couldn't fix," according to Sean Murphy, father of two sons who play in Squirt and Mini-Mite leagues here.

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Old logos

The Bruins' old logo is a black-and-gold spoked letter "B".  The Bruins' new logo is a black-and-gold spoked letter "B" with added black trim.  Karen Lavangetta, a mother of three from Winchester, Mass., recognized the difference immediately.  "One has an extra black line," she said.  "That will make up for the Joe Thornton trade."

New logos. 

The Bruins' other new logo is also an old logo, depicting a prowling bear beneath the word "Bruins" arranged in a semicircle over its back.  The Bruins' owners, whose tight-fisted approach to payrolls is cited by fans as the cause of the team's failure to win a Stanley Cup since 1972, said they chose the old logos as the new logos to save money to spend on free-agents.  "If we take the $85 we will save in artwork and printing costs and invest it wisely, we should be able to take a run at Sidney Crosby when his contract expires," said Jeremy Jacobs from Delaware North headquarters in an underground bunker at an undisclosed location outside of Buffalo, New York.

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Delaware North Headquarters:  "I say we jack up a medium Coke to $15."

The NHL ordered the off-season upgrade in order to stem declining attendance and viewership since the league's 2004-05 labor dispute.  That player lockout caused professional hockey to lose its status as the fourth major sport to bowling, which is interrupted by fights less often.

BowlerWeb.jpg

The next Jaromir Jagr?

Major-league sports team use multiple logos and uniforms to increase revenues from expensive doo-dads that parents must buy their children in order to get them to take their seats, or leave arenas after games.  "The cost of running an NHL is so great that owners need to get revenue from any source they can," says Owen Fisher, an expert on professional sports finances who teaches at Brandeis University.  "People don't realize it, but a rookie defenseman for the Bruins can make as much as a hostess in a really nice restaurant."

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Sure she's cute, but is she a penalty-killer?

In other championship-starved cities hockey fans greeted the news that the NHL had required franchises to upgrade their on-ice apparel with sighs of relief.  Chicago Blackhawk fan Charlie Adams, a pipefitter, said he hoped the change will mean his team will win it all before he dies.  "Maybe they'll have to wheel me into the bleachers on a stretcher, but if I can just catch a glimpse of the guys in their new unis with Lord Stanley's Cup lifted over their heads--I'll drag my butt up to the concession stand and order a Heileman's Special Export beer."

Copyright 2007, Con Chapman

4 Comments | Add a comment   categories: NHL, Hockey, Boston Bruins, Joe Thornton, Chicago Blackhawks, Stuff and Junk, Jaromir Jagr
 
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slshusker
Jun 22, 2007
8:26 PM
Make Minnesota change their fugly uniforms first. Boston's look great already.

Dudski
Jun 23, 2007
3:54 AM
The real question is as she gets older, and blocks 150 or so shots per season, will her looks fade?

loufontinato
Jun 24, 2007
8:09 PM
The 1960's uniforms of the original six teams are the best uniforms in the game. It's been quite distressing to see some of the abortions that the Bruins have worn in the last few years. Original six teams should maintain and or revert in the case of the Bruins to their sixties look. Uniforms of some of the remaining teams are fine as they are. Some teams could stand with some improvement. Vancouver's original 1969 uniform is outstanding and should be worn more frequently. Buffalo's original 1969 Blue and Gold is also the best look they've ever had. The Blackhawks white jersey is the best looking jersey in all of hockey. Most of St. Louis' looks in the past have been good but I'm not too happy with their current one. Philadelphia's Trick or Treat colors have been disgusting since 1967. They should simply go to the Eagles or the Phillies colors. Penguins uniforms have always been good even their original blue ones. The LA Kings are another team that has never had a good-looking uniform. Dallas' uniform is kind of drab compared to the more colorful version they had in Minnesota. The current Minnesota uniform is uninspiring. Columbus, Nashville, Colorado, same category. Next category up from the bottom are San Jose, Anaheim, Islanders, Oilers, Flames, Atlanta, Washington. Ottawa, Tampa, Phoenix, Carolina, Florida, uniforms are fine as they are. So 14 teams could stand some improvement along with Philly and Boston's vomitous looks.

Last edited by loufontinato on June 26th at 9:35 AM.

kellyscott
Jul 2, 2007
9:33 AM
yea marketing sells tickets we all know that!! you have to market your team to give it a boost!!! but at the university of oregon, i would love to have gotten a dime for every uniform change in the past few years for football, yellow to dark green to lite green, and to top it all off last year we sported some of the ugliest yellow helmets ive ever seen!!!!!! and we lost the bowl game to BYU!! please soemone grab the athletic folks at oregon and tell them uniforms dont win games talent does!!!!!!!!!

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GerbilSportsNetwork
Con Chapman is a Boston-area writer. He is the author of "The Year of the Gerbil: How the Yankees Won (and the Red Sox Lost) the Greatest Pennant Race Ever," a history of the 1978 AL East pennant race, and a number of plays, including "Number One Hockey Mom," "Please, Pope," and "What Mickey Belle Isle Told You," a trilogy about hockey (JAC Publishing). His work is available on Amazon Shorts (at 49 cents a dowload), and he writes on sports for Flak Magazine.
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