OK, listen up people: The prohibitive favorite to win the NFL MVP plays for the New England Patriots.

His name should be Randy Moss.

Yes, Randy Moss.

Yes, I know, I know. Tom Brady is allegedly playing at an “elevated level” (love those cliché’s that seems to proliferate among announcers). Brady is on a pace to shatter the NFL record for completion percentage (74%), rating (134.0!), and touchdown passes. In fact, if Brady maintains his pace of 60 TD passes, it will rank with the home run record or Wilt's 50 pomts a game - stupefying and next to unbreakable.

Toss in the relentless John Madden man-crush on Tom Terrific (transferred from Brett Favre) that has been copied by every damn announcer (and you thought Favregasms were bad), and Brady looks like a lock.

Except that it would be wrong.

Go beyond the raw numbers, as impressive as they are for Randy: 66 catches for 1,052 yards and 16 touchdowns, a pace that will threaten the single season yardage record, and obliterate Jerry Rice’s TD record of 22 TD catches in a season. It is even beyond the freakish combination of 4.3 speed, the greatest ball skills in NFL history, and his superb hands that have terrorized every secondary he has faced.

Moss is the only receiver in football that can actually out run a Cover Two. Just ask his former coach Dennis Green as he says here.

"Teams might be in a two-deep [zone, with safeties splitting the back half of the field] but I always said Randy would run through the two-deep. To stop Randy Moss, you needed a deep two-deep."

The normal rules don’t apply to Randy Moss, because even when he’s covered, he’s dangerous, and a bad ball is still catchable.

Not since Bob Hayes frightened the NFL into developing zone defenses has any receiver impacted the league to this magnitude. And the lengths defenses go to contain him open the field for the entire Pats offense.

I know, you still want the MVP to go to Brady. After all, if Troy Aikman says it, it must be true, right? And a receiver is only as good as his quarterback after all.

Ok, try this on:

Exhibit A: Pats at Miami: These two TD catches against the Dolphins. Who else could come down with these balls? Does Brady even throw this pass before this season?

Exhibit B: Pats v. Colts. Colts lead 20-10, Brady is struggling. Brady tosses one deep, Moss beats the Cover Two for a momentum-changing 55 yard play. Pats score soon after to cut it to three, and then score again to preserve their undefeated season.

Exhibit C: These numbers: 92.6, 63.8, and 7.9.

Those are Tom Brady’s previous career highs in passer rating, completion percentage and yards per attempt.

This year those numbers are 134.0, 74.0, and 9.1

Coincidence?

The Pats are on a pace to destroy the season record for points set by the 1998 Vikings led by… Randy Moss.

More coincidence? Come on; say it is, I dare you.

Yes, Brady has Wes Welker, who is having a career season of his own. But Brady has had a Welker in the past – Troy Brown. Nice receiver, but neither he nor Donte Stallworth (2007’s Deion Branch) give cornerbacks and defensive coordinators night sweats.

And Tom Terrific has never had a year like this with Brown and Branch.

As to why Moss is not getting enough love from the press, well, he isn’t loved. Some of that he’s brought on himself. He didn’t cover himself in glory last year in Oakland, but frankly, that was not a professionally run franchise last year. Sorry, but I can’t drop all of the blame at Moss’ feet.

Besides that, many of the same people voting for the MVP love Brady and trashed the trade (including Pats Cheerleader Peter King). It may be too much to ask humbled Moss critics to see the light.

First, they’d have to wipe the egg off their faces.

This is why I don’t waste my time screwing around with mock drafts.

The Houston Texans signed Mario Williams in advance of the NFL draft last night, setting themselves up to be the most savvy or stupid team of the modern draft era. In doing so, they passed up Heisman Trophy winner Reggie Bush, the most explosive player in college football in the last 20 years whose incredible speed and moves had scouts comparing him to Marshall Faulk and Gale Sayers. Heady company to be sure.

You have to give the Texans credit for testicular fortitude though. Either Super Mario had better be the second coming of Reggie White or Deacon Jones – or Reggie B. had better fall horribly flat on his face. That is almost the only way you can justify this pick, right?

The case for Williams: You had the 31^st ranked defense in the NFL. You’re switching from a 4-3 to a 3-4. There is a DE available whom scouts are comparing to Julius Peppers. Mario Williams fits the bill. He’s a wrecking crew that can almost immediately push your D into the Top half of the league. Moreover, he’ll play every down, you aren’t sure that Reggie Bush can. After all, you have David Carr, a solid QB who has played behind awful offensive lines. You signed a Pro Bowl wideout in Eric Moulds, who would go nicely with Andre Johnson, who seemed as affected by the general malaise as Carr. Do remember that Domanick Davis is a 1,100 yard back behind this sorry excuse for an O-line line. Give him a better offensive scheme, which coach Gary Kubiak should provide and what can he do then? Who needs to pay big bucks for a back that can't carry the ball 20 times a game, who isn't even on the field on short yardage?

The case for Bush: Back in 1983, the Houston Rockets had the 1^st and 3^rd pick in the NBA draft. The first pick was a no-brainer, Ralph Sampson of Virginia. With the 3^rd, the Rockets felt the pressure – tons of it - to take a hometown boy from University of Houston, Clyde Drexler. Bill Fitch had other ideas. A defensive minded small forward from Louisville caught his eye nice fella named Rodney McCray. And the Rockets drafted Rodney Mac. And he was a solid, hardworking forward for over a decade in the NBA.

Alas, Rodney was no Clyde. Drexler finally wound up with Houston in 1995, just in time to help them win their second consecutive title. But imagine a Houston team with Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde, and a healthy Ralph in the second half of the 1980s. Bling bling baby. 

The Texans drafted Rodney McCray in cleats.They went safe. Why take Michael Jordan when you have Clyde already? Except that Domanick Davis isn't that good.

Hey, I know Reggie Bush carried the ball 20 times just twice in a game his career. I know he goes 200 pounds. I know he doesn’t move the pile.

No, what Reggie Bush does is that he moves the ball. In huge chunks at a pop. I’ve heard wonderful things about Mario Williams, but no one – I mean no-body has claimed that this guy reminded them of Bruce Smith. Or Deacon Jones. When is the last time that a college player was ranked this high and compared to ####le Sayers, and did not deliver? Exactly.

Overall, this works for both men. New Orleans with the second pick has the ability to trade out to a team that could use Bush (and the list is longer than one might think), and that team is likely to have a solid offensive line. The worst thing for Reggie is to play for a bad team and a bad line that will give him few creases. Bush in a Raider, Eagle, or Bronco uniform? Think Tony Dorsett with the Cowboys. Would he have had as much success had he started his career in Seattle or Tampa Bay? And remember, Dallas had their Domanick Davis, a nice solid running back named Robert Newhouse.

Of course, things get really interesting if New Orleans takes him, especially given that they have a gimpy Deuce McAllister and holes elsewhere. More than anything, Reggie needs to be with a coach who has offensive imagination. Is that present in Nawlins? Sean Payton does have experience with Tiki Barber (a similar style back) in New York. But if you buy the hype, Bush is a level beyond Tiki.

And if you think today is strange, what happens if the Saints pass on Reggie for D’Brickashaw Ferguson? Or take Matt Leinart? Even though the Jets have issues elsewhere, can they pass on Bush? If they do, will the Titans deviate from drafting Vince Young or Matt Leinart? Hard to believe, but possible. Expect one other player to free fall out of the Top 10.

All because the Texans went safe. Good luck.

I'll admit that I did not see much of Mario Williams. However, I saw a ton of Reggie Bush. If Pete Carroll played him at wide receiver, he'd been All-American. He has the fluid moves of Gale Sayers, and no one - NO ONE hit him flush. He takes kicks back to the house.

Every time Reggie carries the ball, it was like Gale himself said once, "18 inches - that's all I need". Get Reggie to the second level, and you might as well get the extra point team up. If Mario racks up 11-15 sacks a year, and Reggie winds up being Blair Thomas, then the Texans win big.

Now, who REALLY believes that?

A number one overall pick.

A tenth-round selection.

A guy who went to Canada to play quarterback for six years because one look at his skin made teams think “defensive back”.

Toss in a running back that had a chip on his shoulder because he was picked number 40 in the draft, an offensive lineman who was cut by two different teams before finding his All-Pro niche in Miami. A converted center who went on to be a dominating guard.

The roads to the Hall of Fame are many, and later today the NFL will announce their Hall Of Fame selections. 15 finalists. Anywhere from four to seven players and contributors will be selected. For some unknown reason, no one from the NFL called me and asked to submit a ballot. The nerve of some people.

So here is my look at the following finalists: Reggie White, Troy Aikman, Warren Moon, Thurman Thomas, Derrick Thomas, Harry Carson, L.C. Greenwood, Claude Humphrey, Russ Grimm, Bob Kuechenberg, Michael Irvin, Art Monk, Gary Zimmerman, John Madden, and Rayfield Wright. The last two are special selections from the Veteran’s Committee.

The 15 finalists all make a great case for enshrinement. Some of this group is stone cold locks. Others make a very strong case, but perhaps not this year. Here are my picks:

The Locks

Reggie White – The late, great Minster of Defense might have been the best two-way lineman who ever played the game. An absolute beast against the run, also racked up 190 sacks in his career, as I pointed out in an earlier article. Had 21 sacks in 12 games in 1987, a record average of 1.75 sacks a game for the season. 124 of his sacks came in his 121 games with the Eagles. Had 10+ sacks in nine consecutive seasons, another NFL record. Whether lining up at tackle or defensive end, Reggie ruled. 13-time All-Pro, and 13 Pro Bowls as well. Added intangible: Reggie's signing with Green Bay was a huge turning point for that franchiese in the free agency era. The conventional wisdom held that premiere black players would never go to Green Bay, which previously had all of the appeal of Siberia in January.

Why he is a lock: You are kidding aren’t you? His bust was cast sometime during the early 1990s while he was still active. The only real regret is that this is a posthumous honor.

Troy Aikman – Won three Super Bowls with the Cowboys, which will get you in the Hall even if you ran the wishbone. As it happened Troy could throw pretty well too. Six Pro Bowls and 3 All-Pro selections attest to that. This was an offense that really centered on Emmitt Smith (in my opinion the true heart and soul of those Cowboy teams), but when the Cowboys put it up, Aikman was as accurate as they came. Career 61.7 percent passer. Try this stat: 41 times, Aikman completed 70 percent of his passes (minimum of 20 attempts) in a game.

I’ll be honest, his career numbers pale compared to many of his contemporaries, and I feel that when the Cowboys were no longer able to dominate on the ground, Aikman wasn’t a player would could put the 'Boys on his back and carry them.

Nevertheless, he was the trigger man on the winningest team of the 1990s (Aikman had a record 90 wins in the decade).

Why he is a lock: Which part of “Three Time Super Bowl Champion” didn’t you get? The man is a lock. Just don’t ask me to rate him in the top-15 of all time quarterbacks.

Thurman Thomas – I have a soft spot for Houston football players, especially ones I saw play in high school. “Thermal” was the key to the Bills K-Gun offense along with QB Jim Kelly. Led the NFL in total offense a record four consecutive seasons. Ran for more yardage in the 1990s than anyone not named Emmitt Smith or Barry Sanders. Five consecutive All-Pro selections, and should have been named MVP of Super Bowl XXV. Who cares that he was on the losing team of the closest Super Bowl ever? With career totals of 12,074 yards rushing and over 400 receptions. Besides Thomas, only Marcus Allen and Walter Payton are members of the 10,000 yard/400 catch club. Played in four Super Bowls, and is the all-time playoff record holder for touchdowns and points. He was drafted in the second round after a stellar college career at Oklahoma State (Barry Sanders sat behind him for two years), and used that snub as fuel. Sometimes, he seemed to never get over it, but can you argue with performance?

Why he is a lock: Thomas was a rare talent as double-threat runner/receiver with a high level of production.

Got to put them in…

Harry Carson – In an earlier article, I noted that Harry Carson was one of the greatest players not to be in a Hall Of Fame in his sport. The heart and soul of those great Giant defenses, the signal-caller for the best linebacking corps of the decade, Carson made 9 Pro Bowls, and six times made the All-NFL first or second team. Respected football analyst Paul Zimmerman calls Carson, “The best short yardage and goal line linebacker who ever played.” As solid in pass coverage as he was against the run, Carson maintained a high level for his entire 13 year career. Stirred a controversy last year when he told the Hall Of Fame to take him off the ballot and leave him alone. I love his style.

Chances – I think he probably helped himself last year with his comments. Harry should have been in years ago, and is probably wondering, “What in the hell happened to that advantage I was supposed to get from playing in New York?” He’s on Dr. Midnight’s ballot, and I give him a 75-25 chance of being in this year.

Warren Moon – He didn’t throw his first NFL pass until he was almost 28 years old. Coming out of U-Dub, scouts saw the strong arm, the mobility, and thought, "There goes a safety...". So off Moon went to the Edmonton Eskimos, where he won five titles in six seasons. Moon reminds me of the great black baseball players of the 1930's and 40's who spent their best years in the Negro Leagues, then got a late start in the so-called majors and dominated.

Even now, some scouts from the late 1970s will say that he would have been drafted as a quarterback. Sure you did. Moon and Steve Young are the two most underrated quarterbacks in NFL history.

Consider that despite the late start, he finished his career third all-time in attempts, completions, and yardage, and fourth in touchdown passes. If he had had those six years in the NFL instead of Canada, Dan Marino (and everyone else) would be chasing Moon in the record books.

As it happens, over his 23 seasons in two leagues, Moon threw for 70,325 yards and 425 touchdowns. But let’s just stick to the NFL numbers no? His 527 yards in a 1990 game versus Kansas City is second in NFL history, and the most since the AFL-NFL merger. A record eight straight Pro Bowls, and nine total (the last appearance an MVP one at 40!). 49 300-yard games in his career, only behind Marino and Dan Fouts. Nearly 50,000 NFL passing yards and 292 touchdown passes. Strictly on an aesthetic level, Moon threw the prettiest, most effortless ball ever.

Chances – I say he is a lock. However some critics have tried to diminish his numbers as a product of his offense (overrated nonsense), and the fact that his teams never went to a Super Bowl (didn’t stop Dan Fouts and Sonny Jurgensen to name two) will hurt him in the eyes of some. Rate him as an 85% chance of induction this year.

Claude Humphrey – I’m always on the lookout for guys who were overlooked by the general public. Humphrey is already forgotten by many, but this was one of the great pass rushers of all-time. In an earlier blog on great pass rushers, I left him off my list as well. Shame on me.

Part of the problem is that most of his best years were on some bad – really bad – Atlanta Falcon teams. Yet he still had 122 career sacks in 14 seasons, and he missed all of one season due to an injury. In his second-to-last season, he had 14.5 sacks for the Eagles, helping them reach the Super Bowl. Seven times he was selected to the All-Pro team, all while with Atlanta. In the 13 seasons he played, he led his team in sacks nine of those seasons.

Chances – Playing on mostly mediocre teams, where opponents could scheme him out o####ame plan without penalty, he still averaged nearly 9.5 sacks a season. L.C. Greenwood played in the same era and did not approach his pass rushing numbers (although Atlanta was usually bad enough where Humphrey probably got considerably more snaps to sack a passer). Humphrey gets my vote, but I think his chances are 30% of getting in this year.

John Madden –  I have more on Big John in my earlier column on the Top 10 players/coaches not in the Hall Of Fame. Madden has the highest winning percentage (an incredible .739) in NFL history for coaches with 100+ wins. I can’t ignore a raw number that impressive, and let us not forget that the Raiders played in seven conference championship games during his tenure. Six times, the Raiders fell to the eventual Super Bowl champions, including twice each to the great Steeler and Dolphin dynasties.

Chances – Being a Senior’s selection is a great booster. Big John is in on my ballot. My regret is that I have to sacrifice a spot for a player, and an offensive lineman paid for that. Another factoid I heard driving yesterday:

Madden's record against 10 other Hall Of Fame coaches? 33-12-1. Not bad at all...

In case you haven’t noticed by now. I’ve got seven on my ballot: Aikman, T. Thomas, White, Moon, Madden, Humphries, and Carson. The dance card is full.

With deep regrets, here are the guys who have to "Wait ‘til Next Year:

Michael Irvin – Ironic that his nickname “The Playmaker”, while being accurate, also eerily recalls the short-lived and controversial TV show on that Other Sports Network. Irvin certainly was a magnet for off the field drama, but on the field, he was a beast. Specialized in pushing off and shielding defenders from the ball. Worked the deep routes, short routes and everything in between. Averaged an outstanding 15.9 yards a catch in his career.

There is a temptation to compare Irvin to Art Monk because of their size, but Irvin was faster and more explosive, and an equally tenacious blocker. Despite playing in a run-oriented offense, and having his career end early due to a neck injury, Irvin still put up impressive numbers with 750 catches in 12 seasons, despite losing most of two seasons to injury. Five Pro Bowls, three Super Bowl rings as part of the “The Trinity” (Irvin, Aikman, and Smith), and 47 100 yard receiving games.

Chances – Most years, an absolute lock. But given his occasional off-field issues, including the incident that got him in hot water a month ago, he may get bumped for a year especially given the depth of the candidates this year. He gets in next year on my ballot, but only because I have no room for him this year. I think Da Hall selects him this year at the expense of Moon and Grimm.

Derrick Thomas – I suggest you read my Great Pass Rushers blog for more stats on Derrick. Another nominee that will sadly be a posthumous one, Derrick was a devastating edge rusher who still had some good football left in him when an auto accident paralyzed him and eventually ended his life far too early. Based on his body of work, while impressive, I can’t put him in ahead of someone as deserving (and long-suffering) as Harry Carson, who was a steadier player who was a shutdown defender against the run, an area while DT was sometimes indifferent to.

Bob Kuechenberg – It pains me to say nice things about anyone who went to Notre Dame. But how can I not sing the praises about a player who got cut twice, played semipro ball for seven games (and only got paid for two of them) before getting signed by the team where he found fame? Miami signed a free agent salesman. They got a six-time Pro Bowler who was durable, tough, and versatile enough to be named an All-Pro at two different positions in the same season. In 1978 he spilt the season between guard and tackle. He made the Pro Bowl at guard and was named All-AFC at tackle. Was a key part of the Dolphins’ offensive line that set an NFL record for rushing yardage in 1972, and made three straight Super Bowl appearances.

Chances – Great story, great player. Not enough offensive linemen get in as far as I’m concerned. But, the competition is a bit too stiff this year. I count three locks (White, Aikman, and T. Thomas), and at least one of the senior’s selections will make it. The Hall Of Fame almost never takes more than four to five selections, and even with me maxing out my seven slots, I can’t fit him in. This year.

Art Monk – Like Chris Noth on “Sex in the City”, “Big” is usually the adjective that is used to describe Art Monk. And in his case, no Hollywood embellishment is needed. 6-3 and a solid 210 pounds, Monk was the prototype of a trend away from small, quick receivers to the type of player who could muscle through jam coverage and go across the middle and operate between the hashmarks. Caught an NFL record 940 passes at the time of his retirement. Set a single season record of 106 catches, both marks have been surpassed since. As tough blocking as he was going over the middle. As devoid of ego as they come. Twice made All-Pro, and selected to three Pro Bowls.

Chances – Not all that good. I know, I rated him as highly deserving previously, but when going into the “Upon Further Review” mode, Art Monk has some flaws that put him behind some of his peers. While he has three Super Bowl rings, which should count for something, his lack of a downfield game and only three Pro Bowls in a long career will hurt him. Career average of just 13.5 yards a catch (Irvin averaged 15.9 by comparison), and never scored in double figures in touchdowns. My feeling is that Art will need some help from the Senior's Committee down the road if he doesn’t get voted in within the next 3-5 years.

Russ Grimm – Oink oink baby. The last thing a hapless defender often saw in the 1980’s was number 66 pulling on the famed Washington “Counter Gap”. Russ Grimm and Joe Jacoby were the Gene Upshaw and Art Shell of the 1980’s – in other words, a utterly devastating left side on offense. Grimm was a charter member of “The Hogs”, the premiere offensive line of the 1980’s. When the Hogs ran left it was behind Grimm and Jacoby. In the clutch, Washington went left, and usually they got the job done. Grimm‘s excellence was rewarded with four straight Pro Bowls and All-Pro selections. He topped it off by being voted to the All-Decade Team of the 1980s.

Chances – Grimm is worthy. But more worthy than Gary Zimmerman, who was first or second team All-NFL eight times? You can’t beat the marketing edge that being A Hog gives you. But fairness says that Russ waits another year or two.

Rayfield Wright - My earlier version of this post did not have my views on Rayfield. My apologies, because the "Big Cat" was hard to miss. An anchor of the Cowboys offensive line for fourteen years, he was the only Cowboy to have played in the Ice Bowl and also play on all five Super Bowl teams of the 1970s. Six straight All-Pro selections, six Pro Bowls, and he made the All-Decade Team of the 1970s.

Chances - In my mind, if you make an All-Decade team, you should be in the Hall. That denotes a high level of play for an extended period of time. The Senior's tag certainly helps. And he clearly has been overlooked. I do NOT believe in this silly "anti-Cowboy bias" talk that has been going around - and note that Wright just entered the Cowboys Ring Of Honor two years ago. Clearly, he hadn't been getting the love for a while. Having said all of that, Wright should get in. The question is, will there been enough room in this year's very impressive class?

L.C. Greenwood – I don’t what it is, but “L.C.” just sounds like a bad-#### football name. I don't know about the rest of y'all, but I'm running FAR away from a 6’6” man named L.C. you know? And for 13 seasons, many NFL offenses tried. Most of them didn’t make out too well. Ask Fran Tarkenton!

Few defensive lines in NFL history could approach the tandem of Greenwood and Joe Greene. Only 74.5 sacks in his career, but he had to share with teammates on probably the greatest defense in NFL history. Tremendous big game performer with two sacks, three batted down passes and a safety in SB IX, and three sacks in SB X. Twice an All-Pro, five times an All-AFC performer.

Chances - Strong performer, but not quite in a class with some of his peers. We’ve also seen darn near every teammate and ballboy of his on the Steelers teams of the 70's inducted already. That tends to work against you after a while. 

Oh and the gold shoes? “#### Eye for the All-Pro” can’t be far away...

Gary Zimmerman – Eight Pro Bowl selections for an outstanding offensive guard who made All-Pro with Minnesota and Denver. Even by offensive line standards, he flew under the radar. This is one reason why he will not make it in this year. I rate him as a lock within five years. It should be sooner, but Russ Grimm and Bruce Matthews (when eligible) will get press ahead of Gary.

Last night, ABC called it a wrap for Monday Night Football, a TV institution on a par with I Love Lucy, Seinfeld, and The Cosby Show. In fact, it outlasted the lot of them combined. It moves to ESPN, and let's face it, even if you have cable and hang at sports bars (for the women or men I'm sure), free football moving to cable is never a warm moment.

I mean really, image Cheers or Living Single moving to the Wifetime, uh Lifetime Network. Yeah, I thought so.

Of course MNF was two entitles. The Game and The Show. The first 15 years, the game was secondary to The Show. And if you are under 35 or so, I pity you, because you'll truly never get it. Dandy Don Meredith, Frank Gifford, and the legendary Humble Howard Cosell created a dynamic that will never, EVER be duplicated. Don't think that ABC didn't keep trying to do so either. When MNF-The Show jumped the shark, MNF-The Game lived on.

But when the show was about The Show, Lord help us. It was Don deflating Howard, Howard pontificating, Frank (or Keith Jackson) marching forward through the flak, not quite oblivious, but knowing that SOMEBODY had to keep the show grounded in this reality. At its best, it was by a thread.

It was the impromptu moments that made even a dog game worth watching, because you just didn't know what would happen next.

And since it was on free TV, you knew you could talk about it with a co-worker, and even a female one. My mom would have paid good money to throw a brick through the TV set at Howard, just like a bar in Denver famously did. Mom didn't hate Howie either - it was the toupee that irritated her. The Voice just closed the deal.

You wonder about the future of The Game though. Monday Night was a sign of Respect. I'm talking La Costa Nostra respect. When your team played on Monday Night, it was like having 45 instant Made Men. Instant national recognition. The entire nation would be watching, and in the pre-cable, pre-Direct TV-NFL package era, that meant EVERYTHING.

Teams that weren't MNF regulars like Dallas, Oakland, and Miami knew the deal - don't screw that #$%# up. Win! At least be competitive! The Oilers got smoked bad on Monday Night in the early 70’s and didn't show up again for years. Somehow, the Chargers made Monday Night in the mid-1970's when they stunk, and it was big news. The city didn't want the stigma of a blacked-out Monday Night game, and bought up the extra tickets.

Back in the day people. Back In The Day...

Alas, you will never have a Howard Cosell again. We're far too PC a society. Bill Walton probably comes closest in sheer obnoxiousness, and the TNT NBA crew has amazingly funny chemistry with Charles Barkley, Ernie Johnson, and Kenny Smith. But they're on cable.

With that in mind, here are my favorite memories of MNF, in no special order:

1. Earl Campbell's Coming Out Party - The Perfect Storm of The Show and The Game. Houston and Miami. Don Shula and Bum Phillips. The Tyler Rose already was a sensation his rookie year, with a package of power and speed not seen in the NFL since that Brown guy was blowing up linebackers in Cleveland. The Fish featured Delvin Williams (out of Kashmere High in Houston), who was the number two rusher in the league behind Campbell. Houston hadn't been that amped since Santa Ana rolled The Alamo. That night over 53,000 lunatics packed the Astrodome and actually silenced Cosell for a minute with a 60 minute roar that seldom let up. Powder blue pom-poms. Love Ya Blue signs. A corny but infectious fight song.

If  you ever wonder why the NFL wanted football back in Houston, just pull out a tape of that game.

Oh, and Earl rolled for 199 yards and 4 TDs, including a clinching 83 yard run that still sucks the breath out of the room. Houston 35, Miami 30. Some still say it was the greatest game in Monday Night History. You will get no argument from me.

2. Halftime Highlights - For those of you born in the ESPN era, you don't understand how it was to see maybe 2-3 games a week. And that was IT. No ESPN, very little footage of other games. Except for when Howard would do his halftime highlights from around the NFL. Years later, we all find out that he was watching a monitor and recording what he saw, just as we would do it. And we didn't care.

"Joe ...Willie...Namath throwing to THAT MAN - RICH-ARD CASTER, down the middle, touchdown JETS!"

Don't act like you didn't do a "Cosell". We all did. I knew a girl in junior high who did.

3. Bo Knows The Boz - Some called it the Irresistible Force and the Immovable Object. Bull. It was the Phenomenally Talented meeting the Phenomenally Hyped. Since Earl, only Bo Jackson could come with the power (6-1 225), and the speed (allegedly 4.25) like that. His rookie year, he met the Other Rookie. Brian Bosworth. A tackling machine in college, his talent was only exceeded by his mouth. I never saw a white guy channel Ali like that, so I can't be too mad at him.

Then came the game. Bo smoked Boz on a short TD run, I mean blew him up, and it was showed repeatedly for the next....hell, I think I saw it this morning. Jim Brown grumped, "You'd think that Bo was the first man to run somebody over..." Jim, it wasn't his fault (or yours) that MNF didn't catch up drilling Sam Huff my brother.

Then the exclamation point, Bo turns left on a pitch, and goes 91 yards, posterized the Boz again, and ran away from half the Seahawks as he took it to the house. It was capped with the greatest Non-Celebration Celebration, as Bo ran through the end zone and into the tunnel. Rumor has it he made it to the Bay Area before coming back. A perfect ending, demanding a curtain call. In a road game.

4. Sky Fan - Bears-Packers game. Pretty ordinary game...can't remember the year (it was the early 90's) but an extra point is attempted. And this was the tunnel end of Soldier’s Field. The net hadn't gone up, and it was all this guy needed to leap from the stands and catch the ball as it passed through the uprights - at least 15 feet off the ground before gravity took over and he crashed to earth. That is an American hero!

5. Tony Dorsett Takes It To The House - My Vikings and the hated Cowboys. Danny White hands off to T.D. from his own 1. Dorsett, who might have been the fastest great back in NFL history got a seam, blasted through hit, veered right to the sidelines, and it was over. 99 yards. A record that can be equaled, but not surpassed.

And the Cowboys only had 10 men on field. Damn.

Well, at least the Vikes won the game.

6. Howard Cosell and The Little #### - It was the Cowboys and Redskins 1983, and Washington wideout Alvin Garrett, one of the famed Smurfs, was undressing the Cowboys secondary with his running after the catch. At 5-8 and weighing slightly more than Sarah Jessica Parker, he basically skittered all over the field. Howard could nothing but exclaim in admiration, "Look at that little #### run!" I guess waterbug, squirrel, and jackrabbit were taken. Worse, Alvin Garrett was black. Oops.

But the funny part was, Howard got embarrassed, and took a LOT of heat. But but no one black I knew thought he meant any harm. And well they shouldn't, after all black athletes from Ali, to Carlos and Smith to Ray Leonard never had a better friend in the media. It was just a bad - and hysterically funny - choice of words. Humble Howie survived. But the incident did hurt him. A pity. Howard was no Al Campanis.

7. The Juice Was On The Loose - Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, we all liked O.J. Simpson. It didn't matter if he ran through an airport or the Steelers - we wanted The Juice On The Loose. It was a game in Cincinnati and when Riverfront Stadium got wet, everything on the field started to hydroplane. People, footballs, refs...you'd better have an anchor. O.J. gets the ball makes two or three of his patented sick moves, breaks into the broken field - and then it gets fun.

He goes right, puts on the brakes - and slips on his butt. Slides a good five yards, gets up in one smooth motion, cuts back completely across the field and outraces at least four Bengals into the endzone.  At least four others still have groin issues from his cutback.

8. Obi-Wan Montana Strikes Back - Denver and Kansas City met in a 90's Monday Night game with a high level of hype. One of the rare times John Elway and Joe Montana faced each other. And the game matched the hype. Less than two minutes to go, and Mr. Ed led one of his patented drives to put the Donkeys up by four. One small problem. He left about a minute on the clock. And just like Obi-Wan, Joe cut off Anakin Elway and the Broncos off at the knees with a 70 yard drive in about 50 seconds, capped by a TD to Willie Davis (?) with 5 seconds on the clock.

I tell ya, Joe left Mile High Stadium with nothing but smoldering stumps.

Legend has it that Montana whispered to Elway during their post-game hug, "I am the master..."

9. Randall Cunningham Goes Straight "Matrix" - Giants and Eagles. Randall always had a little something special for the Giants. This 1992 game was no different. From around the 10 yard line, Rocket Randal rolled right. Carl Banks zeros in on him and drills him square in the midsection. Knocks Cunningham into a three point stance, but his knees never touched the ground. Uses his off hand to stabilize himself, and straightens up, backs up and fires a TD to Keith Jackson.

The only thing better than the play was the look of utter and absolute disbelief on the face of Carl Banks.

10. John Lennon Visits The Booth - I don't even remember the game. I can't tell you who played. But it was John Lennon, less than year before his death hanging out with Cosell and Meredith. It sounds really trite to say "you had to be there", but you really and truly did. Kayne West might get a similar reaction today, maybe Diddy. But who would play Cosell? Who COULD?

10a. The Lonesome Oiler Fan - It was the early 70's and the Oilers were getting killed (yet again), and in the 4th period, the cameras caught a solitary fan. He caught them too. With a middle finger. Meredith, in a superb moment of adlibbing, said, "He's saying the Oilers are Number One."

11. George Blanda's Last Stand - It must have been 1974. The United States was 198 years old. The NFL was 55 years old. Blanda was 46.

It was late in a game against the Dallas Cowboys, and Blanda comes in to play quarterback. The guys in the booth had a field day with The Old Man. Humor with more than a little love for a guy who inspires me when I play ball in my late 30's.

My mom, ever the voice of sanity and common sense, was in disbelief more than anyone, "That old goat? They're going kill that man, why won't sit down before he gets hurt?" Dad and I were dying laughing. And we all were rooting for The Old Goat to throw one more TD.

And he did, I think he drilled a strike to Cliff Branch. It was the last TD pass (number 242 I think), of an incredible career.

Ok, gang. Now it's your turn!