This will be the last thing I write before the judges tell us who won . . . though with the way things have gone the last day or so, I really wouldn’t be surprised if they just called this whole thing off. I bet it stinks for them to watch this really fun experiment turn nasty because a few people got out of control . . . But anyway . . .

I just wanted to take the chance to sincerely say to those who took the time to read and comment . . . “thank you.” It means a lot to know that, in a competition with odds such as this one, what you are putting out there is entertaining to some people.

I would also like to say that there are some very talented writers out there. It has been a blast reading all of your work. I would list my favorites, but I don’t want to start another ridiculous round of accusations, hyperbole, etc. You know who you are.


To whomever wins, I look forward to reading your stuff. Good luck and God Bless.

Last night I watched a regular season college basketball game.

Big deal, right?

Well, for me it is. You see, I used to be a pretty huge hoops fan. I was weaned on Larry Legend and Magic. Came into my own in Jordan’s heyday. Was captivated by Clyde, wowed by Worthy, and dazzled by Dumars. Scottie, The Dream, Isiah, The Mailman . . . I knew them all well.

And it wasn’t just the pro game. Some of my first college sport memories were of the March Madness variety: the epic Georgetown/Houston matchup in ’84; Bob Knight’s Indiana team in ’85; the Running Rebs’ of UNLV in ’90; Duke’s run with Hurley, Hill, Laettner, et. al. There was a time when I loved college hoops. But something happened on the way to “middle-aged.”

I lost interest in the game.

I can’t figure out exactly why this happened. I have tried to pin it on the emergent hip-hop culture that pervades the NBA. I have wondered if being a nearly thirty, middle-class white guy makes it hard to relate to the mostly young, mostly black, mostly wealthy athletes who play the game. But I’m convinced this isn’t it. When I have followed basketball sporadically over the last few years, I have been watching AI, Ben Wallace, KG, LeBron. These men definitely represent a culture to which I cannot relate very much. But when you watch them play, you don’t see culture, you see game. Besides, I never identified with Stockton's tighty-whities either.

I think maybe the changing nature of the pro-game has something to do with it . . . the departure from the fundamental team game and the prevalence of the “1-on-1 at the top of the key, clear out the lane, drive to the hole” playground mentality. But even this complaint seems flimsy. There will always be good teams playing sound basketball. And this only explains the reason for not watching the pro game. College ball is still fairly solid in terms of fundamentals.

So, I don’t know exactly why I stopped watching the game. Maybe it’s a combination of things. But I do know this. I know why I tuned in last night, why for the first time in years I made a concerted effort to be in front of the TV when a basketball game tipped off.

The reason? Simple. Adam Morrison.

I know, I know. Some of you hoops aficionados out there might scoff: “He’s not a complete player.” Yeah, I’ve heard that. And it may be true. But I’m not interested in all that right now. I’m just trying to see if this kid is for real. And you know what? I think he may be.

Like many, I tuned in to the Memphis-Gonzaga matchup hoping to see a game that lived up to the hype. But unlike many, I cared less about the game itself and more about Morrison. I had heard the comparisons to Bird, and was intrigued. Other than Morrison going stone cold in the last 9 minutes (due to Memphis lock-down D), he lived up to my expectations. But it’s funny . . . there’s something about the way Morrison carries himself that reminds me less of Bird and more of Pistol Pete. Obviously, Maravich and Morrison’s game aren’t reminiscent of one another, but there is something about Morrison’s swagger that reminds me of that air of confidence that Maravich had. Not ego, per se, but confidence in the skill, confidence in the ability to beat you, to hit the clutch shot, to go off for 40. Morrison has that.

Morrison is averaging 28 a game, and last night against Memphis, went for 34. He is so fun to watch. The way he moves away from the ball, his high release, the moppish hair, the Freddie Prinze ala “Chico and the Man” moustache . . . He draws in the casual fan and reminds me why college hoops are so enjoyable. (He also reminds me a lot of Jimmie Fallon, but that is beside the point.) But I think the comparisons to Bird are not completely accurate. Bird played relentless, tenacious defense. Morrison admits he doesn’t care to D-up. Bird wasn’t necessarily an assist machine, but was the master of the timely “dime.” Morrison could use some improvement in this area. But when it comes to shooting . . . dang. The boy’s a gunner. And I can definitely understand the Bird comparisons there.

Will Morrison lead ‘Zaga to the Dance? I don’t know. Will he be able to make the leap to the pros? Can’t say. But I do know he has helped a former fan find new interest in the game. That should count for something, right?

I said I’d keep the office stuff to a minimum, but people, it’s just too much to bear. I need an outlet.

So I got cornered by our IT guy today. My bet is that every office has “this guy.” He knows so little about sports, yet, because he’s from Green Bay, considers himself a Packers aficionado. When I first met Cheesehead (his real name has been changed because . . . well, because I don’t know it, OK? I’m a terrible person.) several years ago, I noticed the “Wis-CAN-sin” accent. I live in Alabama so this is unusual. I say, “Where are you from?” He says, “Green Bay.” I say, “Ohhhhh! A real, live Packer fan!” For a nano-second, I am in heaven. Like Bartolo Colon at Denny’s, I believe I have just entered the promise land. “Another sports fan? Hallelujah! My days of toiling in the sports fan’s black hole are over.” I am ecstatic. And then all my hope is destroyed. I say, “So, do you think it was a good move taking Nick Barnet in the first round?” The blank stare said more than words ever could. Cheesehead obviously spent most of his life in his parent’s basement tinkering with various electronic devices. When his mom bought him his first Commodore 64 back in ’83, he was hooked. 20 years later he’s my IT guy. Which is not so bad, except now we have made the Packer connection. Anytime he sees me, and I mean every, single time, he’s says something like, “Heey there, the PAY-ckers are REE-ly gittin’ it DUN, this YEER, HUH?” I don’t have the heart to mention Farve’s demise, his 42 interceptions, Samkon Gado, etc. So I laugh and say, “Oh, yeah. Tearing it up.” And shuffle along. Sigh . . .

On to my ramblings . . .

NBA
I am convinced Ron Artest has no friends. Know how I know? If he had friends, they would have never let him get that stupid haircut (what’s with me and haircuts today?). There is not one person is his life who has the chutzpah to say, "Yo, Ron Ron . . . ummmm . . . about that hair cut idea . . . " I have, like, two friends. Not that tight with either of them. But they would call foul if I proposed something that stupid. But then again, they're not scared that I might attack them.

Oh, my gosh! Did anyone see that Charlotte-New Jersey game on Wednesday night? I didn’t think so.

Is it just me or does Carmelo Anthony look like Andruw Jones with braids? I can't help but wonder if their careers will be similar: tons of potential, moments of brilliance, but overall lacking the drive to push themselves to the next level (though Jones finally put together a great year this season). We'll see . . .


NCAA Football
I am so tired of ESPN broadcasting news conferences for recruits to announce what school they're attending. What’s next: “Tim Tebo will announce in a press conference on Monday his choice of breakfast cereal. He's narrowed it down to Frosted Flakes, Lucky Charms, and Smacks!. (Word is that he eliminated Rice Crispies because of some questions regarding the "alternate lifestyle" of Snap, Crackle, and Pop.) "We're excited to be in the running for Tebo's services," said Tony the Tiger. "We think he has GREEEEAAAATTT potential." Lucky the Leprechaun entertained reporters for half an hour or so at his complex, but no newsworthy quotes emerged during what could only be described as a continuous stream of unintelligible gibberish. "Dig 'em the Frog” did not return phone calls left at his office.”

For whatever it's worth. I think Texas has the best chance of any team in the last two seasons of beating USC. USC's defense is fallible, especially in the secondary. Besides, Vince Young looks a lot like R Kelly. Just an observation.


NCAA Basketball
October through March = pre-season.

Check back with me after Selection Sunday.