Let's see if I've got this straight.

Britney Spears, who got almost as much air time at the Super Bowl in the early 2000s as Kurt Warner's wife, is suddenly deemed too skanky for the NFL Network to consider using in a commercial during the Super Bowl.

And that's presumably even if she promises to wear underwear.

But 40 million viewers in the U.S. are going to see her soon-to-be ex-husband shilling for Nationwide Mutual Insurance?

Now, I know when I look at K-Fed, I think corporate pitchman. However, when that very disturbing thought crosses my mind, he's pimping for Valtrex.

But this turn of events in which uber-Pepsi spokesperson Spears can't volunteer her way into a Super Bowl ad but a failed former dancer, a wannabe rapper and a future deadbeat dad is going to sell insurance on advertising's biggest stage may very well qualify as one of the four signs of the apocalypse.

Fortunately for those of us a little nervous about the end times, Peyton Manning gravy-training his way to the Super Bowl on the backs of his defensive line is also one of the forerunners to the end of the world.

And that could never happen, right?