OK, he's not really. And the story behind that photo at the right isn't really all that weird; Moss was merely in his native West Virginia to open an Inta Juice franchise in Charleston.

But we just couldn't pass up the opportunity to 1.) write that completely misleading (although technically 100 percent accurate) headline and 2.) show the world just one of the employment options that will be at Moss' disposal should (heaven forbid) he accidentally run down another traffic control officer with his car and get booted out of the NFL.