For years, I've marveled at the level of animosity that existed among NASCAR fans for Jeff Gordon. Sure, the guy had the temerity to dominate the sport without being a redneck. But that hardly seemed sufficient reason to question his sexuality or openly root for him to perish in a fiery wreck.

But now I think I understand where the hatred comes from.

If the allegations in a recent lawsuit are to be believed, Gordon has devised a nefarious plan to put wings on the No. 24 car and fly it into Fort Knox, has a secret trap door in the car which he uses to "drop tic tacs and oil" onto the track and stole Kitt, the talking Trans Am from the television show Knight Rider.

Now I'm even starting to hate that bastard Gordon.

Of course, the litigant in question, a South Carolina inmate named Jonathan Lee Riches, may not exactly be reliable when it comes to documenting Gordon's various misdeeds.

Riches, who is serving 10 years for his participation in an identity theft ring, has filed 31 lawsuits from prison since 2004 -- many of which were directed at high-profile sports figures.

Among the more notable of Mr. Riches' accusations:

-- Michael Vick, Wayne Gretzky, Michael Jordan, Joe Montana, Tony Montana (yes, Mr. Riches is filing legal actions against fictional characters ... which somehow makes sense given the level of legitimacy of the lawsuits), Mickey Mantle and Allen Iverson failed to build an anti-UFO defense system at the prison Riches currently calls home, were behind the break-in at the Watergate and picked on Riches in high school, stealing his lunch money and using it to purchase performance-enhancing drugs.

-- In a separate suit, Riches claimed Vick stole two pit bull dogs from him, sold them on eBay and used the proceeds from that sale to purchase missiles from Iran. Riches also believes Vick has ties to Al-qaeda, which would make that alleged acquisition of weapons from Iran particularly frightening.

-- Barry Bonds and Bud Selig conspired together to drive up television ratings, with Selig himself providing Bonds with the steroids under the supervision of Sammy Sosa. According to Riches, Bonds also used Hank Aaron's corked bat (using a secret chamber within the bat to hide his stash of HGH), sold steroids to nuns and bench-pressed Riches without his permission.

So maybe we'll hold off on a rush to judgment as far as Jeff Gordon is concerned.