As the midterm elections approach, the latest rumor making its way through the corridors of power in Washington has Vice President Dick Cheney resigning so that he can compete during the inaugural season of the World Hunting Association.

OK, so the only part of that sentence that is true (at least as far as we know) is that there will, in fact, be an inaugural season for the World Hunting Association.

And since ESPN recently decided to categorize bass fishing (along with competitive spelling and cup stacking) as a sport, deer hunters apparently wondered, "Why not us?" And while the notion of a professional hunting league is largely laughable to us, it's really, really difficult to argue with that logic.

It will be a rarity when there exists an event so utterly bizarre that no commentary on our part will be necessary, where it will be sufficient to let whatever oddity we've unearthed from the fringes of sport stand on its own merits.

This is one of those cases.

We give you ... shin kicking.

Players, wearing the traditional white smocks of shepherds, grasp each other by the shoulders and attempt to land well-timed blows to their opponent's shins.

Nothing more really needs be said.

I, for one, will sleep much better at night secure in the knowledge that science is not yet capable of cloning a race of super mules that will dominate their naturally bred brethren in the ultra-competitive field of mule racing.

Now, on the other hand, the knowledge that they actually race mules may be just disturbing enough to cost me a few winks.

Because you know, nothing says your sport is poised for a return to the big time like having a trained monkey picking winners. And beating the so-called experts.

Well, nothing except having your playoff games broadcast by a cable station that may be getting crushed in the Nielsens by the Home Shopping Network.

But for those of you who are comfortable taking gambling advice from simians -- and admittedly, there may be room for debate over who's more evolved, macaques or hockey fans (just kidding, Roger) -- Maggie is picking the Oilers to beat the Hurricanes in the Stanley Cup finals.

Why are we getting the sense that the World Cup is going to be a verifiable treasure trove of strange but true sports stories?

Maybe it's the World Cup trivia toilet paper we're hoping to get for our next birthday. Or the Bangladesh university that will suspend final exams during the tournament after hundreds of students laid siege to the vice-chancellor's office in protest. More likely, it's the warnings about unlicensed products that COULD KILL YOU if you're not careful.

It's going to take some serious self control on our part not to go to the World Cup well too often during the next month or so.