So if Eddie Murphy can portray multiple characters in what seems like every other one of his movies, why not LeBron James?

Or maybe the fact that Murphy insists on donning either the fat suit or prosthetic breasts with disturbing frequency is actually an argument against the eventual creation of LeBrons: The Movie.

Now I love Grandpa LeBron as much as the next guy ... but the mere possibility that Cavs star LeBron James' Nike-fabricated family is being considered for the silver screen should make it completely evident that we've run out of Saturday Night Live sketches to try to stretch out to 90 minutes and Hollywood is officially scraping the bottom of the idea barrel.

Just when I thought Utah Jazz forward Andrei Kirilenko's wife, Masha Lopatova, had put the "greatest wife ever" debate to permanent rest with her "one groupie per year" allowance, along comes Colleen Pavelka.

The Chicago-area school teacher opted to have the birth of her second child induced a few days early so her husband, Mark, could attend the NFC championship game between the Bears and the Saints.

Now all of a sudden it's a serious race, one compounded by considerable uncertainty over which would have personally landed me in more marital hot water -- attempting to attend a sporting event, no matter its significance, just two days after the birth of either of my daughters or lobbying for one, shall we say, extracurricular activity per calendar year.

POSTSCRIPT: Much to the dismay (I imagine) of the handful of you who responded to this entry by shamelessly rooting for the Bears to go down to humiliating defeat right in front of Mark Pavelka's eyes, Chicago is heading to the Super Bowl.

I have no way of knowing whether his car was sideswiped in the parking lot during the Bears' victory, as at least one of you hoped would happen. You know who you are.

It would be way too easy to make the requisite "you drive like an old man" joke in response to the news that 72-year-old James Hylton is attempting a comeback at the Daytona 500 more than 40 years after he won NASCAR Rookie of the Year honors.

It would also be way too hard to pass up the aforementioned joke, no matter how easy (not to mention ageist) it may be.

So here goes ...

We can only imagine how ticked off Tony Stewart is going to be when Hylton spends 500 laps at Daytona going just 125 miles per hour (hey, that's slow for Daytona) with his lights on in the middle of the day and his turn signal on the entire time.

His right-hand turn signal, mind you.