Sometimes you can have too much of a good thing.

Between the rogue fan ripping Carolina Hurricanes jerseys off Raleigh-area statues, the demise of the greatest sporting event I'd never heard of until it was sadly too late and the impending introduction of Driven, the cologne for people who want to smell like Derek Jeter (presumably after his postgame shower), it was getting difficult to put all the weirdness into its proper perspective.

That's when IMs from former college roommates come in awfully handy.

"News flash: Not to be outdone, A-Rod has just announced his new cologne ... Choke."

Thanks for the assist, Guy.