When the average person thinks about a bowler, they normally visualize a beer-gutted man, with a cigarette in one hand and a mug of beer in the other, slowly raising the mug to his scruffy face between frames. This unfair stereotype of a fat, uneducated man loaded up on beer and tobacco is a stereotype that many hold upon me and my fellow bowlers.

Stereotypes in the sports world have been going on for years. In your school, you might of sit next to a football player and frequently think "dumb jock" or hang out with a golfer and secretly perceive him as stuck up or a richy-rich kid. Bowlers tend to get this prejudice more than any other sport because most people's warped minds won't allow them to include educated or athlete in the same sentence as bowling.

Bowling is one of the most mentally demanding games the world has to offer. While golfers have sand traps and trees to avoid, bowlers cannot see the obstacles that are in front of them. The oil pattern on the lanes is invisible, and you have to be smart enough to adjust to this ever-changing environment. If you're nothing but a nimrod, you won't be able to meet the grueling pressure. The mental part of the game makes the stereotypes hard to hear.

I attribute these judgments to a movie that put bowling in a bad light. That movie is "Kingpin," and an image of Woody Harrelson and Bill Murray floats into my head. A rubber hand and comb-overs, while funny, gave the non-bowling world an unfair assumption that that's how bowling tournaments run and that bowlers are fools who simply throw a ball down the lane.

These misconceptions carry on to the TV world also. Homer Simpson is made out to be the world's dumbest cartoon character ever. He is often depicted bowling in a tight, button-down shirt, with his belly hanging out, and he slurs every word but "Doh!" while holding a beer. Why does my beloved game have to be relegated to stupid cartoon characters?

These stereotypes must stop! Bowlers, I call on you to write your congressmen and your local governments with these complaints. These injustices must cease. Especially in a world of political correctness and apparently big, drunk guys who could kill the common man, you would figure people wouldn't be so cruel.

The bottom line is that bowlers are people, too, and we really aren't all big and stupid. Some of us are educated and compete in things like forensics or even write for the paper. Some are academic all-stars or some play football or basketball. The truth is, you can be a bowler and a debate champion at the same time. Bowlers can be smart, sober, hairy and fat, or none of the above. We are who we are, so accept it and don't categorize us into a preconceived mold.

So if you still feel like playing all bowlers for fools and expecting nothing but drunk, fat guys after league night with comb-overs, spare me. Women bowl, too, after all, but that's another story.

The rise of NASCAR in our society has made me ill. NASCAR's continued coverage and fan-fare over the last few years has made me wonder how anyone could actually proclaim it as a sport.

This mind-numbing question has clouded my thoughts for several weeks now and has brought me to make my own criteria for what is a sport and what isn't.

It has brought me great pain and joy in blowing up certain games, but I think I have been fair in my judgment.

First of all, if the contest is judged and not officiated, it is not a sport. This means that if a judge makes the final decision on who wins and not some sort of scoring system the contest is forever axed as being considered a sport.

The French can fix any competition they want, but they can't do it to true sports anymore. This new rule brings death to cheerleading, gymnastics, juggling, figure skating, and the X-Games as sports.

Sorry boys and girls but your competitions have been downgraded to games.

Secondly, the contest must take physical activity. If a driver is sitting down, pressing a pedal down, that doesn't count as enough activity.

I have heard the arguments that NASCAR takes endurance and focus for the three to four hours that they sit in their intensely hot car. I understand that, and respect it, but siting in a hot car doesn't make NASCAR a sport.

If endurance and focus constitutes something being a sport then ESPN would have to add sex, constipation, and binge drinking to their lineups too, and I'm not personally ready to see that.

The last part of these criteria is, if you can smoke, drink alcohol, or eat while participating, it's not a sport. Getting cut off the air of ESPN are bowling, spelling bees, pool, fishing, and poker.

I know slaughtering NASCAR, bowling, and figure skating may get me hurt in sports circles, but I have to stick with my beliefs. NASCAR isn't a legitimate sport and bowling and figure skating are maybe on the bubble if they made a few changes.

NASCAR may eventually get passed if they started pedaling the cars instead of having them run on gas fuel.

That would make democrats happy because the mindless waste of gas for a race in a circle would be over. It's not like fossil fuels are depleting or anything. It would also pass the physical activity part.

If they decide against racing Flintstones style, they will have to pull their teethless heads together and find another way. NASCAR may take my suggestion or may not. I truly don't give a damn. The truth of the matter is NASCAR isn't a sport and hopefully one day will not be regarded as one.