A wise man once said, "It's okay to look at the menu as long as you eat at home."

So for those of you who love posting pics of booties and boobies galore, keep bringing 'em. Fox bloggers get to see so much eye candy around here that they'll actually begin thinking their lady is 18 again when it's time to hit the sack.

In other news, it looks like there are two elite teams in the No-Nonsense Ballerz Association and 28 teams in the NBA. Here's how I got 'em stacked so far...

1. Lakers - Why wasn't Mitch Kupchak trippin' on getting defensive specialist James Posey in the offseason? Two words: Trevor Ariza. He's happening so much that exactly zero people in Los Angeles remembers who Maurice Evans and Brian Cook are.

2. Celtics - If they still had Posey, maybe they wouldn't have lost to Indiana and be 9-0 instead. I'm callin' it right now. The Mean Green Machine will miss P.J. Brown even more come playoff time. 

3. Cleveland - King James and the Knights of the Brown Table are looking majestic right now, as Mo Williams happens while Ben Wallace happens to be all but retired.

4. Pistons - They're .500 with Allen Iverson. A sign of things to come for Detroit? We'll see how they fare tonight against the Young Guns of Figueroa.

5. Hawks - What's most impressive about their start is their 4-1 road record. Flip 'n' Mo making everyone in Atlanta forget about the dude from Mayfair High in Lakewood who went Euro on 'em.

6. Jazz - They're like the Tennesse Titans. Always strong in the regular season but when it's time to dance, not everyone shows up.

7. Trailblazers - Second-best current winning streak in the West, and they just got Lebron Sr. back. Rudy Fernandez is the frontrunner for Sixth Man Award. He's Ginobili without the wear and tear.

8. Rockets - I will keep saying this throughout the year: Their good but they have no backup for Yao. No backup for Yao... No backup for Yao.... Houston, it will be a problem.

9. Hornets - What's wrong with the Hornets? Peja Stojakovic. He's a major liability and he was the reason they lost to the Spurs in the playoffs last year and he's the reason they won't get by the Lakers. If you ask me, I'd rather have Julian Wright in the game.

10. Magic - If only Dwight Howard could develop post moves and hook shots. If only...

11. Suns - Nash is old. Hill is older. Shaq is Shaq. Barbosa and Bell aren't the same without The Matrix. And their coaching staff consists of three unproven leaders - Terry Porter, Bill Cartwright, and Dan Majerle. Yikes!! At least they still have Amare.

12. Pacers - Big win over the champs proved something to themselves. And now they're on a three-game win streak. Somewhere, Larry Legend is smiling.

13. Knicks - I never thought I'd have them ranked this high, but I guess this is what happens when you put an end to Starbury. Mike D'Antoni has got the team playing inspired ball. Let's see how long this offense-without-defense experiment lasts.

14. Raptors - They desperately need consistency from Anthony Parker and Jason Kapono in order to contend in the East, where two-guards and small forwards dominate. Otherwise they'll be first round feeders once again, and I could care less if they have C.B. and J.O.

 15. Nuggets - The addition of Chauncey Billups will help their balance, but sadly enough they're still the Nuggets. Which means first round and out.

16. Heat - Sometimes they look brilliant, sometimes they look like a college team. How much more of this can Dwyane Wade and his aching body handle?

17. Bulls - Derrick Rose, so far, is looking like the rookie of the year. Bulls (with all that talent), so far, are once again looking like disappointments of the year.

18. Bucks - They don't play any defense. In real life, bucks don't have much of a defense either against hunters and predators.

19. 76ers - With a new leader at power forward, the first month will be like training camp. Once the rest of the players get familiar with Elton Brand's tendencies, Philly will take off. I expect the Sixers to be one of the hotter teams after the All-Star break.

20. Kings - There is absolutely no reason for 80-year old Brad Miller to be on this team.

21. Spurs - They're really a top ten team, but when two of your top three players are out, well, you know the outcome. With the way things are going for the 4-time champs, Coach Pop might start sitting in at malls dressed up as Santa Claus come December.

22. Mavericks - Mark Cuban will not have this. I'm sure of it. For the very first time, he will be seriously entertaining trade offers for Dirk Nowitzki this season if the Mavs keep this up.

23. Grizzlies - Marc Gasol is looking to be the suprise rookie thus far. O.J. Mayo looks like a future star in this league. Rudy Gizzay is already a star. Mike Conley is promising. This looks like a college team.

24. Warriors - Hurry up Monta. They need ya. Corey Maggette is tired of jacking up shots.

25. Bobcats - There's only so much Brown can do for you.

26. Wizards - The sad thing about the Wizards is that even if Hibachi were in uniform, they'd wouldn't be much better than what we're seeing now. The reason they're 1-5 is because of the absence of Brendan Haywood.

27. Nets - Vince Carter slowly missing R.J. and J-Kidd after each mounting loss. Devin Harris says he doesn't really care, so he goes out and scores a career-high 38 without regard for Carter's touches.

28. Clippers - B-Diddy looks uninspired. Marcus Camby looks old. Chris Kaman looks nothing like himself. Cuttino Mobley looks the same. Coach Dunleavy looks lost. In other words, same old Clips.

29. Timberwolves - Not much to say here except for Mike Miller acquisition looking like it's not paying dividends.

30. Thunder - The only thing thunderous about Oklahoma City is its weather. Their season is FUBAR.

More stuff...

- Overhyped Italian Danilo Gallinari looks to me like he will be another European bust because he can't seem to stay healthy and strong enough to compete with NBA-level competition. He looked good in preseason but then again so did Slava Medvedenko...

- Why the Cavaliers will be elite: the core group has had valuable playoff experience, they've suffered growing pains and heartbreaking losses together as a unit, they're solid defensively, and now they're generating a ton of momentum and cohesion while Lebron James evolves into a more complete force...

- Why the Pistons won't be any better with Iverson: He holds on to the ball way too much, which will inevitably take away the impact of guys like Tayshaun Prince and Richard Hamilton, players who move extremely well without the ball...

- Atlanta is one solid shot blocker away from really bothering the Celtics. They should find a way to bring back Dikembe Mutombo...

- Big-time trade proposal:  Dirk Nowitzki to Miami for Shawn Marion. Impact: Dallas gets to run-n-gun with Kidd, Matrix, and Howard while Miami gets the legitimate second scorer they need to complement D-Weezy.

- Is it just me or does anyone else here think Gilbert Arenas' glory days are all but over?...

- The most exciting divisional race in the West this year will be the one between Utah, Portland, and Denver...

- Now that everyone is witnessing the Lakers' dominance on a consistent basis, raise your hand if you believe the Lakers would have defeated the Celtics in the NBA Finals had Andrew Bynum and Trevor Ariza been 100% for the playoffs...

As always, the you-know-what continues.