Here's a modern twist on an age-old philosophical question. If a player demands a trade and nobody pays attention, did he really say it?

After the end of last season, Manny Ramirez informed the Red Sox he wished to be traded, as he had done at least once during the season and at various other times in his career. So far, nothing has come of that request. But does Manny really want to be traded or doesn't he? Who can tell; he may not even have the same opinion on the subject today that he had yesterday.

Here's a little recap of Manny's recent past:

----------July 19,2005 - During a pitching change in the middle of an inning at Fenway, Manny disappears into the left-field scoreboard through the door the operator uses to get in and out. No one except the television cameraman notices, and to complete the bizarre tableau, the new Red Sox pitcher (I can't recall exactly who it was) actually throws a pitch as Manny is stepping back out through the door. (Can you imagine the look on the face of the college kid operating the scoreboard? "Dude, I have you in my fantasy league. Get back out there!")

----------July, 2005, just prior to the trading deadline- Manny decides he's not happy in Boston and requests a trade as soon as possible.

----------August 1, 2005, just after the trading deadline - Manny says he doesn't really want to be traded and, in fact, is so happy in Boston that he'd like to finish his career here. He says this while wearing a "Manny Being Manny" t-shirt and the happy-go-lucky grin that makes him look like the kid you remember from high school who could get away with stuff you would never dream of doing because he could make the teachers laugh too.

----------October, 2005 - After the Red Sox are eliminated from the postseason, Manny again decides he needs a change of scenery.

----------January 5, 2006 - It's reported in the Boston newspapers that Manny no longer wishes to be traded. No one can be sure, however, because no one seems to know where he is, including his best friend on the Red Sox, David Ortiz who can say only that he hopes Manny stays.

----------February 21, 2006 - The Red Sox issue a statement saying Manny has been given permission to report to camp one day late, on March 1. This is understandable, of course. It's only been 127 days since he last worked, clearly not enough time to complete all his personal affairs.

This business of Manny being Manny is exhausting. Lance Armstrong would get tired trying to keep up. It's lucky for Red Sox skipper Terry Francona that he started out with a shaved head when he came to town, because he almost certainly would be bald by now anyway. Either that, or he would look like that guy on American Idol with the gray hair, who is 28 but looks like he's 50.

In the midst of all this chaos is Manny Ramirez himself, a sea of tranquility, at least while he's standing at the plate. Year in and year out, he puts up numbers that make your jaw drop. More than 40 home runs and 130-150 RBI per year are pretty much constants for him. It's a tribute to how monumentally bloated Ramirez' contract is that so far no one has been willing to trade for that kind of offensive production.

Manny is lucky to be blessed with so much baseball ability. Can you imagine him trying to hold down a regular job? Just finding his way to work in the morning would be a major accomplishment. Boss: "Mr. Ramirez, don't forget I'll need the Acme proposal tomorrow. We really need to blow them away on this one." Manny: "Riiiight....the Acme proposal....uhhh....Acme....uhhh....what do they make again?"

It appears increasingly likely that there will be no trade and that Manny Ramirez will, in fact, report to camp and be the left fielder on opening day for the Red Sox. If that turns out to be the case, you can probably count on two things. Manny will be one of the most dangerous hitters in the American League all season, and he will do or say a few things over the summer that will leave everyone scratching their heads in disbelief.