WASHINGTON, D.C.  Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was placed on the twenty-day disabled list by President Barack Obama today after she suffered a broken elbow, and former Secretary of State Madeline Albright was signed to a one-year contract to take her spot in the cabinet.

"I landed on my funny bone."

"Madeline Albright will give us the Secretary of State experience we need as we come out of the All-Star break," Obama told the Sporting News.  "She's a seasoned white female with experience handling the weird erotic obsessions of Arab dictators."

"Have I still got it?  Yes.  Was that an intelligent question?  No."

Clinton will undergo Tammy Wynette surgery to repair her elbow, and will play winter ball in less-troubled areas of the world to rehab her diplomatic skills.  "I'm thinking we'd send her to a Baltic state, somewhere where she'll be able to ease her way back to the big leagues," said White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel.  "You can't expect her to stare down Kim Jong-il on her first day back, or tell the difference between Iraq and Iran."

Kim Jong-il baseball shirt.

Albright, the first female Secretary of State, served from 1997 until 2001.  Her tenure was distinguished by mash notes sent to her through diplomatic pouch from Libyan strong man Muammar Qaddafi, and by the fact that she was only woman in a three-block radius of the Oval Office whom President Clinton did not hit on during his eight years in the White House. 

Muammar Qaddafi, at the release party for his "Thriller" album.

Clinton has three and a half years left on a four-year contract, and would then be eligible for free agency. 

"That's a lovely dress.  I've always wanted to see the Alps."

"Obama might try to work a sign-and-trade deal with another western power on the eve of the 2012 elections," said George Will, who writes about both baseball and politics.  "Maybe send her to Germany in exchange for Andrea Merkel and an undersecretary of commerce to be named later."